


Je Suis Amoureux de Toi

by Snowberry



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Amusement Park, Angst stuff, Artist Eren Yeager, Awkward Encounters, College Student Eren, Eren can be damn reckless, Eventual Levi/Eren Yeager, F/F, F/M, First Time, Fluff, France moment, Lawyer Levi, Levi is so gentle here, M/M, Minor Character Death, Mystery Case, ereri, lots and lots of fluff, make-up sex, riren - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-07
Updated: 2015-07-16
Packaged: 2018-03-16 18:58:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 30
Words: 154,682
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3499331
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Snowberry/pseuds/Snowberry
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A breakup. An amusement park. A broken phone. A snot-filled handkerchief. A hundred meters rides. Some Ice cream. An expensive car. And feathery kisses. All in one day.<br/>It was an unexpected encounter with Mr. Stranger and before he knew it, he was already being pulled towards him with this unknown force. Attraction that was hard to cut off had led him to believe in something he thought didn't exist—love. And fate. But along with the package came in the hard truth that could end everything he once believed in.<br/>Love. Lies. Betrayal. This is a story of the college boy and a lawyer who have given their hearts to each other, not expecting what the future has installed for them.</p><p>This is CrimsonHazelEyes from Fanfiction.net. Some of you had probably already read or heard of this~ Hope that for those who have not, would like this ^^</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A Hundred Meters High with Mr. Stranger

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Their first awkward encounter.

**I don’t own SnK**

* * *

  _Fate is like a strange unpopular restaurant, filled with odd waiters who bring you things you never asked for and don't always like._

_-Lemony Snicket_

* * *

 

 

**~Chapter One: A Hundred Meters High with Mr. Stranger~**

 

Eren was completely staring into space, standing in the midst of a crowd.

The roar of the screaming children and adults were drowned in his ears and his eyes were blurred with tears, unable to comprehend why was there a sea of people around him. His held his phone in his right hand loosely and if someone were to accidentally bump into him, they would without a doubt knock his phone out of his hand. But he wasn't conscious of that, either.

His head was still filled with nothing but the same sentence his boyfriend uttered from the other line of his ended call: _I'm breaking up with you._

The brunet sniffled and began walking without destination in mind. He remembered that he was in the amusement park, where he was supposed to meet his boyfr— _ex_ -boyfriend and ride all the attractions that they wanted to get on before...well, before the break-up.

Suddenly, Eren's eyes flashed dangerously and he stopped in his tracks.

"How dare he do this to me..." he muttered between his teeth. He closed his eyes and attempted to calm his nerves by breathing in and out, until someone really fucking did it and bumped into him. His iPhone clattered on the ground and then the next second, the person's expensive polished shoe was _on_ his precious device. His sight heightened and he could see that there were cracks visible. And Eren was ready to flip.

"What the _fu_ —"

Eren trailed off as he turned to face the offender who, by the way, turned out to be half a foot shorter than he was. However, those laser-beam-like eyes with dark half-moon circles underneath were enough to send Eren back to his six-year-old crybaby-self.

"You _brat_ ," the stranger hissed under his breath, his teeth seemed to look like canines of a wolf in Eren's eyes and his tone showing promise of death. The younger man could have sworn that he really did see that nasty glint in the other man's gray eyes.

And Eren cried.

It started with tears flowing one by one, until he full-blown sob and cry in the middle of the freaking pathway of people walking back and forth around the stands.

"I'm s _oooo_ sowwrry!" Eren sobbed out, voice muffled by his cries at the back of his throat. He rubbed his eyes in an attempt to stop his tears, not managing to see the vein that pulsed on the forehead of the stranger in front of him. Why would he apologize wasn't even known to him.

"Stop. _Fucking_. Crying. You, _shitty_ brat," the black-haired man ground out between his teeth as he pulled Eren away from the stares of people, and the pointing fingers of many children who looked a little more-than concerned about the man who randomly cried in the middle of the freaking road.

"Mama! He made onii-san cry!"

"Shh. They'll hear you."

"Oh. Look at that. He really has the nerve to create a scene."

"Youngsters."

"What are they doing?"

"Why is he crying?"

"What? Are they breaking up?"

After the last comment, Eren was dragged to a bench, shaded by a tree that was meant to be a decoration but it was thanks to the adornment that they were shielded from the many weird stares of people. The younger man sat there and wiped his tears harshly on the pads of his palms. There was stillness, but Eren knew that the stranger was still in front of him and was probably waiting for him to stop his whole mess, with little patient threatening to snap any second now.

Finally breaking the silence, the gray-eyed man growled, "What the fuck is wrong with you, kid?" The harsh tone of his voice made Eren flinch and he lowered his hands from his eyes to his laps, looking everywhere but the said irritated man in front of him.

"I-I-I'm sorry!" Eren exclaimed and lowered his head to apologize. Then, something clicked in his mind that made him look at the man abruptly, almost getting a whiplash.

"W-Wait... Why am I apologizing to _you_ when you were the one who broke my phone?!" He yelled out as he pointed an accusing finger to the black-haired man.

Eren stopped for a moment when he realized that he never properly look at the stranger. The same scary expression was plastered on the shorter man, but Eren didn't notice until now how sharply defined the former's features were; a little pointed nose, a strong jaw and a pair of thin lips. His raven hair was parted in the middle and the sides were shaved, kinda like an army under-cut hairstyle. He was wearing torn, dark blue jeans and a black blazer over a white v-neck shirt. Eren swallowed, not knowing what to say about the embarrassing difference between the maturity oozing from the man compared to his.

"First of all, phones get _fucking_ dropped all the time by spoiled brats like _you_. (Eren jumped at the hostility of the man) Second, you were the one walking like you _fucking_ owned the road. (Eren flinched again, shoulders shaking) And third, you caused unnecessary shit by bawling your fucking eyes out in the middle of the _fucking_ crowd like a—"

The stranger stopped in his rant as Eren began crying again, fresh tears escaping his eyes. The brunet sniffled and rubbed the mucus flowing down from his nose with his sleeve, and the shorter man cringed, mentally and physically repulsed.

"Oh, for the love of god..." the black-haired man muttered under his breath, trying to make sense if this young man in front of him was _really_ crying. Again. "You're really like a child."

The brunet avoided looking at the man in front of him, humiliated by the fact that he looked really pathetic that moment. But he was startled when he felt a soft sensation brushing over his eyes, and he gathered up his remaining dignity to glance up at the stranger.

"You look really pathetic." _Wow, thanks for stating the obvious_ , Eren thought sardonically, but he was really surprised that the annoyed old man who was about to blow a fuse just half a minute ago, was wiping his tears away on his face with his handkerchief. He was close enough to see that the stranger's eyes were tinted blue and not all steel-gray, but he also made out the distaste contorted on the stranger's face, and Eren tugged away the cloth from his hand to take over in wiping his self-diminuting tears. He took the chance to blow his nose, too.

"That's disgusting," gray-eyed man said between his teeth and keeping away from the brunet. "Don't you dare return that to me, brat."

Eren nodded immediately, knowing that he couldn't go against the five-feet-three mass of menacing aura. He felt bad, though, because the handkerchief seemed to be a lot expensive and nicer than his whole outfit altogether.

"I-I'll wash it," Eren said softly, ears turning red from embarrassment and holding the piece of cloth tightly in his hand. He heard a sigh which made him look at the stranger again, and Eren almost forgot his manners. He spoke to thank the man, which ended up becoming awkward the next second.

"Thank you for the handkerchief!"

"I'm sorry for crushing your phone."

They spoke simultaneously, with the stranger saying his piece a a lot softer than Eren did. But Eren did hear it. The black-haired man was even handing his cracked smartphone to him, which the brunet gingerly took. He sighed, knowing that he had to go to a repair shop or just buy a new one, _if_ he could even afford another one. He had some money from his part-time—

"I'll fix it," the man took away his phone again, which Eren attempted to grab back but he wasn't fast enough. The stranger pocketed _Eren's_ phone in his jacket and Eren protested, "I can fix it!"

"How about you wash my handkerchief and I'll return this to you undamaged?" The gray-eyed man suggested, face not showing anything; not even a sign of irritation anymore.

"Eh... but...," Eren hesitated. This would mean that he would not have any source of communication with his friends or important people in his college for god-knows-how-long.

"It would only take two days, given my work schedule," the man answered his thoughts, startling Eren.

"Ah. Okay, then," the brunet agreed, smiling a bit. He didn't even question on how would they exchange their possessions for he was too overwhelmed about the series of events that just happened.

"So you were crying because you got ditched and was dumped by your girlfriend?" It came out more of a statement than a question, but it broke Eren's smile and his blood boiled at the sudden intrusion of the subject.

 _It was a_ boy _friend, you scary bastard_ , Eren thought, but he continued to painfully tug his lips upwards.

"I don't think it is any of your business, _sir_ ," Eren gritted out, eye twitching in annoyance. He didn't want to think about it. No, he wouldn't think about freaking Jean, that lying-son-of-a—

"Let's get on to that ride," the stranger suddenly intercepted his thoughts and pointed at the ride across from them. Eren looked at what he was pointing at and he thought that maybe the ride was at least 80 meters. He was suddenly up for any challenges and thought that he really would just rather enjoy his time here and his ticket, without thinking of that—

"Oi. Are you just going to stand there like an idiot?" the older man asked, a few feet away from Eren already. The latter sighed in exasperation and jogged towards the black-haired man, briefly wondering if the stranger would be able to take the ride, given his age. _He's probably like in his late 20's though; shouldn't be a big deal_ , the brunet thought. He didn't even notice that the man already distracted him, and it had just been five minutes after their horrifying encounter.

 

* * *

 

"You didn't even give me your name," the brunet said. Then Levi merely glanced at him for a second before facing forward. They were strapped into their seats securely, and the ride was starting to move. They were rising into the sky in a painfully slow speed and the brat had this shit-eating grin on his face to show his excitement while Levi showed indifference.

"It's Le—"

And they were dropped. He didn't know, maybe from 140 meters? The ride he thought was only 80 meters was actually doubled that and he really could feel the freaking wind mushing his face like a piece of clay in the air.

"Whoooooop!" He heard the green-eyed brat screamed happily. Well, at least he wasn't crying like a freaking toddler anymore.

When the ride stopped, Levi felt cold sweat on the back of his neck and he was completely repulsed by the thought because if he hated something more than anything in this damn universe, it would be dirt or sweat or just being utterly disgusting and dirty and gross and sweaty and—you get the idea.

"That was nice," the brat exhaled a breath and smiled big. Levi didn't know why would such a cheery teenager like him would randomly lose some screw in his head in the middle of the fucking crowd and cry horrifically. It wasn't amusing, to say the least.

"Oh, my name is Eren, by the way," the green-eyed teen said as they exited out of the area. Levi was about to introduce himself but the brunet got distracted by the ice cream truck.

He shook his head in utter disappointment and mild amusement, and Eren looked at him with confused expression on his face. And no, it wasn't adorable (period). "You really are like a child."

"Sure, sure. Whatever," the brat laughed.

Eren bought ice cream, and Levi made sure that both his and the brat's phones were in his inside pockets. Though, he was sure that he could just buy a new one if he dropped it by accident.

The afternoon rolled by and the night came. On the wooden bench near the fountain were two guys who looked like they practically lost their souls. The black-haired man looked like he was exhausted beyond his expectations as he laid his head on the bench with his arm cushioning it, his body turned to the side, and his blazer taken off, lying on the bench. Eren didn't look any better because he already took off his shoes, legs stretched out, his head bent leaning backwards and arms stretched wide on the bench. This time, they didn't care if they got weird looks from other strangers.

A sudden shuffling and the crinkling sound of a plastic bag tore the silence between them.

"Bleechh—"

Levi basically threw up everything he had in his stomach from morning up to that point. Eren's chest weighed with sympathy but with slight hilarity because he didn't think that the stranger who made him cry earlier would be puking next to him.

"You shouldn't have forced yourself," Eren said, voice was hoarse and cracking from screaming.

"Sh-Shut up, brat! Bleechh—"

Eren leaned in closer to the black-haired man and patted his back, which gradually turned into a soothing massage. Levi didn't complain or even let his pride get in the way anymore because it really did eased the convulsions of his innards, as much as he hated to admit it. The kid really gave good massages. And it made him shudder at the one-layer-away physical contact.

"Better?" Eren asked nicely. Levi just nodded.

They sat back in peace, exhaustion weighing on their shoulders and Levi got up before he could be completely taken over by the tiredness rolling behind his eyes.

"I have a car," he stopped and looked down at the younger man, "do you want a ride?"

The brunet didn't want to ask for more favors from the man who basically gave him some company for this particular shitty day. However, he really didn't feel like asking any of his best friends for a ride either because they would probably skin him alive in order to get answers from him. He really wasn't in the mood to respond to questions that would lead to _that_ topic.

"Are you just gonna sit there or what?"

Eren then said, "I don't even know your name and you're asking me to get into your car? How would I know that you're not a psychopathic dentist whose hobby is to pull teeth out of—"

"Oh, Jesus. You never shut up, do you?" the black-haired man interrupted, tapping his foot impatiently. Eren slowly got up and looked him in the eye. Levi wouldn't admit that it stopped everything for a second—the slight buzz of the people in the background, the music from the small arcade, the screaming in the distance—as he stared back to those clear green eyes. Eren's eyes were full of that innocence and honesty and so much more he couldn't point out.

He snapped out of it, looked away and jabbed his thumb to the direction of his car.

Eren obediently followed him and it was weird how they got comfortable around each other that day; with a little chat on the side and just riding stuff around the amusement park for ten whole freaking hours. They questioned each other with some stupid things, like 'What's your favorite food?', 'Do you eat burgers?', 'Do you have a fish or a dog?', and it kept things interesting.

"What _exactly_ is your job?" Eren asked, stopping in front of a silver Maserati. Suspicion raised his voice an octave higher and Levi just snorted at the inexperience of the teen.

"A hitman."

"I'm not getting in." Eren backed up.

Levi rolled his eyes. "Part of a syndicate."

"Holy shit. _No_."

"I'm joking, brat. I'm a lawyer."

Eren narrowed his eyes in suspicion and Levi was really tempted to laugh, but that would absolutely ruin his character. The brunet got in anyway, but not before Levi showed some evidence, like his ID. Thus, finding out the identity of the _benevolent_ stranger.

"So your name is Levi," the green-eyed brat mumbled when they got into the car. Eren would never admit how the name of the not-so-stranger-anymore fit his _decent_ looks. Okay, maybe more than decent. His eyes wandered inside of the expensive vehicle and he was careful not to touch anything because he knew so well how much his bank account would pale in comparison to the cost of one part of this car.

"And your name is Eren. I think we already established that, brat."

"Why are you calling me brat?" the younger man asked, slightly annoyed when he realized that Levi had been treating him like a kid the entire day.

"Because you're a kid. You're like, what? 50 years younger than I am?" Levi deadpanned.

"Excuse you. I'm probably just five years younger than you. I'm 22, _old_ man," Eren sassed.

Levi just stared at him for whole three-seconds and during that time, Eren stared back.

And Levi laughed. Just for a short moment, but he did the _deed_.

"You really are a child," Levi said as his laughter ceased. The gray-eyed man didn't really expect that Eren would think he was still in his 20's. The naive guy was still looking at him like Levi just grew another mouth next to his original one, because he could _not_ believe that the demon stranger he met a while ago could manage this _sincere_ , _whole-hearty_ laugh. And it strangely warmed Eren in the inside, which made everything weird for him.

"I'm 31, stupid." Levi smirked and Eren blinked. No, he did _not_ just think that was sexy as hell. _And what?!_

"What?!" the teen exclaimed. "That's bullshit."

"Want another look at my ID?"

"No way... But, you don't look like a 31-year-old old man!"

"Can you drop the "old" man, brat?" Levi grumbled unhappily.

"Then, stop calling me brat, old man," Eren remarked. They were glaring at each other, emerald green eyes clashing with those blue-tinged gray ones. And they both erupted in laughter.

Levi didn't know when was the last time he genuinely show this side of him to anyone—carefree, happy, and young. He did feel like he was a teenager again, even though he was supposed to be a 31-year old lawyer whose boring life was to remain in an isolated cubicle in the law firm almost everyday from 7 in the morning 'til 10 at night. Why would he overworked himself was unbeknownst to him. And somehow, Eren ended that cycle of misery.

Eren also didn't mean to have this much fun after just experiencing the shittiest break-up in the record of the shittiest relationships. If he were told that he would be spending a day with a stranger, he would have laughed at their face because his best friend, Mikasa, would no doubt kick the stranger's ass just for talking to him.

Which made him snap back to reality and cursed out loud.

"Ohmygodohmygodohmygodohmygod. Mikasa _is_ going to skin me alive," Eren cried out, putting his face on his hands and dreading going home.

"You alright?" Levi asked, unsure if Eren was having another childish episode.

The green-eyed young man looked at Levi with begging look. " _Please_ , take me home before I get killed."

The raven-haired man raised an eyebrow, and started the engine. They were out of the parking lot in no time, with Eren sweating nervously in his sweat and rubbing his sweaty palms on his pants.

"Is she that scary? Your girlfriend?" Levi asked, breaking the silence.

"She's not my girlfriend. And for the record, I dated a _guy_."

Levi shrugged the last part off like it didn't matter, though it was actually really _did_ matter, and pressed on, "So why are you scared of this woman?"

"I'd rather not think about the horrible experience that some of my friends had because of me...and well, her. My best friend is rather protective," Eren explained. He sighed, tiredness sweeping him off the passing scenery outside and he let out a yawn.

"What's your address?" Levi asked instead. Eren managed to answer him before he drifted off to lalaland, not even bothering to think that he could have just used Levi's phone to call Mikasa...but that would probably lead to another bad thing which he'd rather not think about.

 

* * *

 

 

They were at their destination, but Levi didn't know what to do at his current situation. Eren was sleeping, his head almost slipping off the headrest, and his arms were lying on his side. Levi glanced at the apartment building and noticed that there were only a few lights lit up. It was already 12:10 am.

"Aren't you gonna get in trouble?" Levi hissed at the sleeping figure and he leaned in closer to Eren, trying to wake up the brunet. The young man stirred, his head totally slipping off the headrest and Levi was glad that he was able to catch Eren's head on his shoulder.

"You have to wake up, you know—" Levi was cut off as he turned to look at the young man beside him. He really did look like a teenager, with slightly tanned skin and boyish features. His eyelashes were mad long, and Levi found that genuinely attractive. Not that he would admit that out loud.

"I spent one day with him and I'm getting all mushy," Levi muttered under his breath, attempting to look away from the tempting young man on him. But it was difficult and somehow, Levi found himself leaning more closely until his lips hover the green-eyed brat's forehead.

 _I'm probably gonna regret this_ was his final thought and Levi finally pressed his thin lips on the smooth temple of the young man, who was suddenly breathing unevenly but Levi didn't even notice it. He was busy trying to get a hold of the rampaging beast inside of his chest, namely his heart.

The older man turned his face to the front and really resolved to wake the heck up of the brat on his shoulder. He swiveled to his side again, raising his unpreoccupied hand to pinch the young man's cheek, but he was met with staring green orbs.

"Uh..."

Eren blinked. One, two, and three times before backing away slowly. Levi hastily put down his hand and looked everywhere but the brunet, not until he noticed the redness on the tips of the brat's ears and his cheeks tinted pink.

"I-I-I'm go-gonna go! T-T-Thank you f-for the r-ride!" Eren stuttered out. Badly.

Levi chuckled and he reached out to mess Eren's brown hair, which had some sticking out strands with the way he fell asleep. The blush on Eren's face deepened tenfold, which made the older man smirk in more satisfaction.

"Y-You're we-welcome," Levi stammered, mocking Eren. He then said, "See you later, brat."

Eren removed his seatbelt and attempted to narrow his eyes on Levi to glare at him, but it didn't work when the black-haired man was obviously having fun making fun of _him_. However, he really owed him.

"Thanks...for giving me company today."

Levi looked a bit surprised and he shocked Eren, for the third time of the day, because the former was wearing a small _genuine_ smile on his face. It was... really softening and wonderful, and Eren suddenly didn't want Levi to do that around other people.

 _As if I have any right..._ Erin's mind trailed off.

The green-eyed young man got out of the car, and Levi was going to unbuckle his seatbelt, too, but Eren stopped him by holding out a hand.

"You don't have to see me off. Just...drive safely and good night, Levi," he said softly.

"...Okay. Good night, Eren."

Eren closed the door but not after he gave an endearing smile to Levi, who swallowed the invisible lump in his throat and restrained himself from really getting out of his car. He didn't want to look desperate.

However, it was Eren who came back knocking on his window.

"What? Forgot something?" Levi asked, eyebrows meeting together in confusion. Eren contemplated before opening the car carefully.

"Yeah. Phone and..." He leaned in and Levi felt a pair of lips pressed on his right cheek. Eren pulled back quickly, "...that."

Nothing was said after that and Eren, out of adrenaline soaring through his veins and his mind being filled with nothing but blood (making him ultimately red), slammed the door of the Maserati with a little too much force that made Levi jump. Eren hurried back to the front door of his apartment building but not without hearing Levi's last words of the night (or day, for that matter).

"Brat. You'll pay for the damages next time!"

_Next time._

Oh, how those two words made Eren toss around in his bed that early morning, not even getting any wink of sleep until the sun really started rising. He totally forgot about his phone, webbed with cracks.

And unbeknownst to Eren, Levi was in the same, exact predicament.

The thought of those feathery kisses somehow left a promise of the beginning of many more beginnings for these two people.


	2. Spark Between Us

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eren sees Levi for the second time.

**I don't own SnK**

* * *

 

_"_ _According to Greek mythology, humans were originally created with four arms, four legs and a head with two faces. Fearing their power, Zeus split them into two separate beings, condemning them to spend their lives in search of their other halves."_

_-Plato's_ The Symposium

* * *

 

 

**~Chapter Two: Spark Between Us~**

_Bang! Bang! Bang!_

Eren's eyes snapped open and he sat straight up on his bed, wincing when his back cracked loudly.

_Bang! Bang!_

"Eren! Open the damn door!"

 _Oh shit_. He knew that voice everywhere; well, how could he not when that person had practically grow up with him. She was the protective mother hen among their friends, and the one he knew the longest. Eren knew what her reactions were going to be in particular situations, what she liked and extremely hated. There was no in-between for her or mildly disliked because she was the type of person who would instantly categorized one thing (or a person) in her list of likes and hates. And Eren would _not_ want to be on her hate side.

He hastily got up from his bed and put a pair of sweatpants on, the one hanging on the swivel chair in front of his desk, almost tripping face-first on the ground. He left his room in haste, forgetting the other pair of his slippers and passed the kitchen connected to a living room, to the small hallway of his apartment. The young man breathed out a large huff of air and stilled his nerves when he put his hand on the doorknob.

_Here goes nothing..._

_Bang! Bang!_

Eren finally opened the door and there, his childhood friend greeted him with an angry glare. Her dark brown eyes seemed to penetrate his whole being and he felt a chill running down his spine as he met those icy daggers shooting around from her eyes.

"Where the hell have you been? And why couldn't I contact you?" the young woman snarled, and Eren imagined some four paws ready to tear him apart. Not that she would. _Right?_

"E-Err... Amusement park? And I broke and lost my phone?" the green-eyed lad answered unsurely.

Suddenly, images from last night's events came rushing back to him and almost knocked him away from his ground. Mikasa must have had noticed that he staggered slightly because the furious expression on her face cracked with lines of worry. She grabbed a hold of his arm before Eren could actually drop dead.

"You haven't been drinking, have you?" Mikasa asked, voice was interlaced with accusation, betrayal, and disappointment. Only Eren could actually tell those emotions in one-go because he knew Mikasa inside-out, and she probably knew him better than himself. Well, at least, not at his given circumstance right now.

Eren sat on the mini-step at the entrance hall and slumped his shoulders down, letting himself relax a bit. Mikasa let herself completely inside the apartment and closed the door behind her, sitting beside her best friend and ready to support him in case he were to fall.

"I haven't gotten much sleep," the brunet said. _That_ didn't provide any explanation but Mikasa looked like she was ready to let go of the issue at hand. Eren could finally get some peace and quiet.

"Why? I'm asking you what happened yesterday because I bumped to Jean last night. I thought you guys were supposed to be together at the amusement park?"

Or not.

Mikasa was _totally_ not just going to drop the subject and the newfound information about Jean just increased Eren's incoming headache. This was the subject that he had been dreading to discuss for he wasn't ready to relay the lame break-up that just happened yesterday. On a happy note, a certain short, older man certainly made yesterday a bit more fun than Eren originally intended to.

"Why are you smiling?" Mikasa asked, scrunching her eyebrows together in confusion. Eren immediately tried to cover his mouth, which was indeed displaying an embarrassing smile, but he ended up slapping himself in the process.

"Ow..." He yelped and he attempted to rub the skin that was slightly turning red. Mikasa shook her head and grabbed Eren's chin a bit non-too-gently. The green-eyed man watched as his friend caressed his skin with obvious affection. She rubbed his cheek and around his mouth, her eyes focused on what she was doing like she was trained to do this, and her fingers stopped moving on the side of Eren's lips.

Eren didn't know whether he found the atmosphere a bit too comforting or just plain awkward. Mikasa's hair were untucked from her ears and Eren noticed how much it had grown since a year and a half ago when she decided to cut it just _slightly_ above her shoulders. Her eyes that seemed black were actually dark brown in the light, and her feminine features were defined. She was known in their college for just about everything; looks, brains, AND her notorious glare. He wasn't that clueless as to why Mikasa turned all her suitors down.

Eren knew.

He knew that behind those mother-like gestures that seemed natural for her was something _more._ It sprouted like wings and made Mikasa stood out more among the other girls in his university. He knew that the way she looked at him wasn't a look of a sister ready to scold her brother but more of a woman concerned about the one she loved.

Yeah, Eren knew that Mikasa loved him. No, she was _in love_ with him. He didn't know when it started and Eren was afraid to know.

He was afraid to know how long had he been unintentionally hurting her.

"Are you really okay?" she asked him, breaking his trance. The brunet blinked once, twice, and thrice until he shook out his thoughts. He smiled to Mikasa and slowly pulled away from their close proximity.

"I'm fine."

"Then, are you really not gonna tell me what happened?"

He knew that she wasn't gonna stop asking until he told her, especially since he used to recount every incident that happened to his life to Mikasa and Armin. However, his love life wasn't supposed to be open to her. Recounting his stories would be like pouring salt onto the wound and Eren didn't want to give her more pain.

"Do you really want to know?"

"Eren," she paused and stared him square in the eye, "I'm just worried that something happened. I'm always here for you and if that bastard needs some beating up—"

"No one needs one," Eren laughed. He turned his head away from the woman and stared at his plain, white door.

"Then..."

"We broke up."

"...What?"

"He called me and told me that he's not gonna make it to our date. That we're done."

"That _shit_."

Eren couldn't help but smile. Mikasa getting overprotective of him wasn't something new, and if not a little over-the-top he actually found it a bit endearing. Regardless, he loved her, too. But in a different way.

Mikasa would always be the sister whom he'd never had.

"Well, he is a _shit_ for doing that," he agreed. He leaned back on the floor with his hands propping him up. Eren could feel the gaze that Mikasa fixed upon him. By telling Mikasa about his break-up, she would either offer to comfort him or really beat up Jean. He really didn't want either of them because none would make him feel better. Unless _he_ would be the one throwing the fist to the little bastard of a horseface.

"How did you get home?"

The sudden question caught him off guard; he really did feel his muscles tense under the intrusion of the said question. The green-eyed lad didn't know whether to reveal the stranger he met last night, or keep Mikasa calm and just tell her a white lie. He really didn't want her to get stressed out, especially since her law school was definitely making things tough for her already.

"I took a taxi." A lame, common lie but it was worth a try.

"You weren't home when I visited at 8," Mikasa pointed out. Eren bit the inside of his cheek. Well, how would he get through this interrogation without the mention of the name _Levi_?

Luckily for the brunet, Mikasa's phone rang; the soft piano tune filled the hallway a song that Eren was familiar with. She picked it up and answered curtly due to the unwanted interruption.

"Annie? Yeah. I'm gonna be on my way."

She hung up after the brief conversation and Eren silently exhaled a sigh of relief. He would have to give the certain blonde some coffee in the morning on her way to work as an appreciation for preventing the unavoidable questioning.

Mikasa averted her eyes from the screen of her phone and looked at her best friend.

"We're continuing this conversation later when we meet up with Armin," she stated. No disagreements. No whatsoever. There was really no use going against her because she would totally grill him either way. If not now, she certainly would in the future.

"Are you gonna meet up with your law-buddies now?" Eren asked, a smile playing on his lips. He got up and Mikasa followed after him, picking up the black messenger bag that she put down on the floor, which Eren didn't notice earlier.

"Yeah. I'm gonna see you later. Feel better," she said with a small smile and her stern expression softened up. She reached out for him and he hugged her close.

Mikasa, the one who cared for him and took care of him for five years after his parents died, seemed so strong and dependable. However, Eren was only one of the few people who could hold her close like that and think of how breakable this petite girl really was. And Eren would hate to think that he was the one who could potentially break this form and her heart that was so giving and loving.

Which was why he would never let her know that he knew. At least, not now.

They broke their hug and bid their goodbyes. Eren watched as the gap of the door decreased in size, waiting until the figure of Mikasa was totally gone. Once the click of the door sounded in the hall, he got tempted to sit down and get his shit together.

He had to go through his classes today, which actually could help him divert his attention elsewhere.

 

* * *

 

 

Going to the school by the train was the usual. Going to classes with his old, paint-smudged shirt was also what he had done almost every other day. And greeting Marco in painting class with the usual high five was also part of the routine. No signs of Jean, Mikasa, or Armin, which was good so far.

However, getting out of the class and being greeted with the sight of a vertically challenged man was not at all, the usual.

Levi was leaning on his Maserati car like he was just casually going for a midday sunbathing, which would be something he would need because he was paler than Eren. Not that he minded his skin color or whatsoever; he could be a sun-kissed, tanned old man for all he cared.

The only thing that Eren didn't like at the moment was the fact that he was hiding behind a pillar of the building.

His back was pressed against the cemented surface and he gripped his sketchbook, which was under his armpit. _Oh god, why is he here?_ Eren thought, blinking the sweat out of his eyelids.

"Because of the phone, maybe?" he mumbled under his breath.

He peeked over his shoulder and saw that the gray-eyed man was still just ten yards or so away from him. The brunet wanted to come out from his hiding and ask the shorter man what was up, not that he was expecting him or anything.

He sighed and gave in. He was about to come out when he saw the intern, Hanji Zoe, from the Biology department and she was walking towards Levi.

Back up.

_Don't tell me they're..._

Eren didn't finish his thought as his mind instantly went blank when Hanji threw her arms around Levi, squeezing the life out of him but this went unnoticed by Eren. He was too focused by the fact that the uber-scary man that he just met yesterday would actually allow someone to _hug_ him.

And the green-eyed lad came to the conclusion that the 31-year-old was totally and utterly unattainable for him.

He turned away from the spot; not bothering to look back, as his disappointment and growing frustration gnawed him from the inside.

Thus, he failed to see Levi look at his way as the older man pushed the overly hyped woman away from him.

 

* * *

 

 

Eren's shift at the bakery ended at 7:30 PM. He left the building and bid goodbye to Mike, his boss. The green-eyed lad ran across the street towards the usual cafe he went to. He was supposed to meet up Mikasa and Armin there. He entered the shop and was instantly greeted with the waft of coffee beans, making him close his eyes for a moment and bask in that glorious smell. He went to the counter and waved a "hi" to his friend.

"Can I have the usual?" The green-eyed young man said politely to the blond-haired woman.

"Sure. How's work?" Annie asked him, a slight change from her usual indifferent attitude.

"Good. How's your day so far?"

"I have to prepare for some trial tomorrow."

"Oh, good luck. By the way, did you see Mika—" He trailed off as his eye caught a certain black-haired man, sitting at the corner of the cafe. With Hanji Zoe.

Oh, shoot.

"Oi. Earth to Eren?" Annie waved a hand in front of his face, eyebrows were meeting together in curiosity.

"H-Huh?"

"Who are you looking at?"

"Uh-Nothing. No one." Eren shook his head a bit too eagerly and Annie turned her head a bit just to find out what (or rather who) distracted the young man.

"I've never seen him around here before," the blonde murmured, but Eren heard it.

 _So they don't see each other a lot?_ the brunet thought, hope sprouting in his chest despite his mind telling him to stop his delusions.

"Here's your coffee. I already put two creamers and two sugars in it," Annie said thoughtfully and Eren mumbled a thanks, paying for his drinks before he sat down a couple of tables down the isle from where Levi was.

The green-eyed lad glanced at the gray-eyed man every once in a while. The older man hadn't changed within the twenty hours they didn't see each other; he was still the same grumpy-looking, hot mess of a short person Eren met yesterday. The latter tried to concentrate to find some inspiration from people passing by the cafe and so far, nothing was able to distract him from looking at Levi.

"Have you been sleeping enough?"

"Who cares, four-eyes."

"I know being a lawyer is tough but you _seriously_ need to sleep."

"And I'll appreciate it if you just hand in the documents I came here for."

"I can _not_ believe you didn't tell me that you came back from Japan! What the hell, Levi?!" Hanji's excited voice reached Eren's ears and his interest was suddenly piqued.

"Yeah, well. Yesterday, Erwin told me to go to the amusement park, and god knows why did he send me there just to get some fucking documents from him. And now he's telling me to get them from _you_ ," Levi's uncaring attitude and irritation were presented in his tone.

"And he forgot about it yesterday, didn't he?!" the redhead woman laughed out loud without getting embarrassed and continued, "By the way, why has he been looking over _this_ way?" She was pointing at Eren with her eyes on him.

Eren, who was drinking his coffee and eyes trained on the back of Levi, choked on his drink. He coughed loudly and he cursed, stabbed himself mentally out of shame. His lips were wet, coffee trickling down his chin and his green orbs met Levi's silver ones, which widened at the sudden revelation.

"Brat?"

 _Of course_ , he would call him that.

Eren wiped his chin with a napkin before responding, "H-Hi, old man."

Levi swiveled his small, taut body so he was facing the brunet's direction, much to the latter's embarrassment. He was suddenly guilty that he had been eavesdropping, wishing that the older man would notice his presence. And now that he did, Eren wanted a black hole to swallow him whole because the situation didn't turn out like he wanted it to be.

"Are you stalking my boyfriend?" Hanji asked, mouth was opened in an exaggerating gasp. But the green-eyed man just froze on his seat, almost letting the cup of coffee slip from his hand. He nervously laughed and scratched his head, refusing to meet the look that Levi was heatedly sending him.

"U-Uh. NO. I mean, y-you look familiar and it's my first time seeing you here in the cafe so I was curious," Eren stuttered out. He wiped his now-sticky hands on his pants. _Ugh, gross._

Silence ensued. Except from the quiet rambling noise that a machine nearby was making, and Annie flipping pages of her book like she was just a silent bystander. And Eren needed her to intervene one way or the other. Badly.

Hanji burst out laughing, much to Eren's surprise, and he gathered up his remaining courage and dignity to look at Levi. The gray-eyed man was seemingly distressed, rubbing his temples with his fingers.

"Are you done messing with the brat now, shitty-glasses?" the short man grumbled. He suddenly stood up and stalked towards Eren, who was visibly trembling in nervousness.

"U-Uh. Lo-Long time no see?" Eren mumbled dumbly, raising his hand to silently wave which made him more awkward.

"It hasn't even been a day, brat." Some response, that was.

Levi sat down across from Eren, crossing his legs, and they both heard Hanji whined, "Levi~! Why are you leaving me here?"

"A-Aren't you s-supposed to be with your g-g-girlfriend?" the green-eyed young man stammered, which sent the redhead woman into a laughing fit again, much to Eren's confusion.

"Ignore the insane woman. She's _not_ my girlfriend," Levi gritted between his teeth, like he was disgusted with the idea. Eren's emerald orbs brightened significantly, which didn't go unnoticed by the older man. If only the young man knew what effect he had on Levi...

"E-Eh? U-Uh. W-Why are you here, by the way? I-I mean, not that I mind! Actually I-I don't mind at all that you're here. I-It's just that I haven't seen you here before." Eren mentally punched himself for being such a wuss and for his rambling. Since when was it that he lost all his rationality and spit out words whenever he was in the presence of this oh-so-handsome man?

"Well, if you get your knotted-tongue straightened out, then I'll talk to you properly," Levi responded, a smirk plastered on his face. Eren would never admit that he found that hot. Really...hot—

Eren pinched his arm under the table and grimaced. He had to stop his daydreaming or he would really get in trouble. The young man sighed and he jumped conspicuously when Hanji grabbed a chair from the nearby table and sat down next to him.

"You're young. How old are you?" she asked, curiosity laced in her voice. _Typical medical student..._ Eren thought.

He, nonetheless, answered her, "I just turned 22 a week ago."

"Oooh. Belated happy birthday!" A lazy but playful smile shaped the woman's lips and with her eyebrows wiggling mischievously, her eyes turned to Levi, who was obviously ignoring her and was staring at Eren with such intensity that made the taller man squirm in his seat.

"A-Are you Hanji Zoe from the Biology department?" Eren asked, attempting to strike a conversation and to break the tension hanging in the air.

"Yeah! I'm with some researchers and scientists conducting experiments in the department's laboratory. And you are...?"

"E-Eren Jaeger."

"Jaeger? You're German." Levi joined into the conversation but his question sounded more like a statement. Eren nodded vigorously, a bit pleased with the idea that Levi was indeed a bit interested in him.

"Wait!" Hang exclaimed, eyes shining like she just discovered something amusing. "Does the title _Under Water_ ring any bell to you?" she asked.

Eren, who met Levi's gaze, snapped his head towards Hanji in recognition.

"Yeah. That's the name of the piece that I—"

"I knew it! You were that amazing artist! I saw your work in the gallery show last month and I totally fell in love with your art!" Hang suddenly clasped Eren's hands with hers and his green eyes widened in surprised. Hanji was about to go on to another lengthy rant when Levi tugged Eren's hands off the woman's.

"Eh...!"

Levi stood up abruptly, the chair made a scraping sound on the floor, and he enveloped Eren's left hand with his. The young man looked shocked and his heart suddenly raced a hundred km/hr. Fainting because of the sudden stimulation would be so lame...

He then realized that, even given the fact they spent the whole day together, the two of them had never once held hands. Not that he had ever heard of strangers doing that.

Then again, no strangers would actually share some kisses on the day they met each other.

"I'm going to talk to this brat," he merely stated before dragging away the confused Eren out of Hanji's sight. The redhead woman smirked at the scene in front of her; Levi was pushing Eren out of the door until they totally left the cafe.

"Uh-huh. He's so possessive of him even though he has yet to mark him his," Hanji muttered curiously, starting to hum in amusement. She now had finally found something to tease her friend with, and that embarrassed expression that Levi would have on was enough to make her laugh evilly.

Annie, who was watching the entire play-like scenario with her nose buried under her book, mumbled softly, "Mikasa is going to kill that shorty."

 

* * *

 

 

"Sorry. My friend is really nosy and boisterous," Levi said softly that Eren was afraid he heard it wrong.

They were outside of the cafe, in an alley where there was no one around. A cat jumped on the stack of the wooden crates which startled Eren and made him jump nervously.

"U-Uh. It's okay."

A pause ensued. Surely, Levi wasn't really a criminal, was he?

"Are you really an artist student?"

Eren turned to Levi and nodded, albeit unsurely because he was suddenly hyper-aware that the two of them were alone. The situation could only lead to two ways—him being dead or him being ravished. He gulped; none of those two possible outcomes could potentially benefit him. Not that he minded the second one—

"Oh? Hard to believe that a brat like who you just cried in the middle of the fucking street—"

The taller man huffed incredulously. Eren didn't really want to be reminded of _that_ right now.

"You're really not letting that go, are you? And for your information, I'm a _decent_ artist."

"Pfft. Yeah, right. And no, a crybaby like you is kinda hard to forget."

Eren stopped and thought, _Does that have any other meaning?_

"Then, I'll show you all of my work!"

"Oh? Little puppy ready to bark now, eh?" Levi smirked.

Eren's ears turned visibly red and he crossed his arms in mocked anger. He refused to look at Levi and he knew that it was childish but he couldn't help it. On the inside though, he was glad that the awkward atmosphere melted between them.

"Your phone. I was going to fix it, but it was too troublesome," Levi suddenly brought up. Eren's thoughts flew out of the window as the statement sank it. _Oh, shit._ Mikasa would _kill_ him.

"EH?! Please, give it back to me then. I have important contact information—"

Out of the blue, a smartphone was thrusted upon his face, and the young man blinked in confusion and tilted his head sideways.

"I bought you a new one earlier."

Holy shit. What.

"What...?!"

"Don't worry, I already transferred all of your contacts and necessary data from your old shitty one. I was gonna give it to you tomorrow but didn't know I'd ran into you tonight," the black-haired man said casually like he just didn't spend $500 on a phone. Eren knew that it cost that much because the phone presented to him was undoubtedly the brand new one issued recently.

"I-I can't accept that! I mean, I was prepared to fix or buy a new one, anyway—"

He was cut off by a glare from Levi, and the green-eyed young man gulped. It seemed like he had to be afraid of two people in his life now.

"I was the one who broke your phone, even though it was partially your fault for being an idiot. Consider it a late birthday gift so accept it. Or I'll throw it away," Levi threatened. Conveniently, he was next to a trash bin and Eren didn't want to waste the poor phone so he gingerly took it, his head downcast.

"Th-Thank you..."

As he held his hand to take the object from Levi, his fingertips touched the man's skin, a spark suddenly coursed through his vein and he jerked his hand away.

They really didn't have to take the whole spark thing literally, you know.

Nonetheless, it was enough to make Eren self-conscious again.

"Oi, brat." Levi's husky voice was enough to make the hesitant Eren look at him. Unbeknownst to him, Levi became rooted on the ground as Eren's green eyes lightened under that one lamppost next to them. The man's eyes were enough for Levi to be captivated—completely taken—as the shadows swallowed them whole and only those green eyes sparked with innocence and that mysterious warmth he felt the day he met him. And before Levi knew what he was doing, the he was already on his tiptoes and pressing his lips on Eren's cheek.

It seemed like an eternity long before Levi pulled back, indifference was on his face but Eren couldn't have mistaken the faint blush on the older man's cheeks.

"Payback for last time. And belated happy birthday," Levi simply said and he hastily walked away, leaving a stunned Eren.

And the green-eyed lad was surely thankful that Mikasa and Armin arrived before they could see his beet-red face and the man named Levi. Keeping him a secret would probably the best for now. It wasn't like they would meet each other again, right? After all, he already got back his phone, so there would be no reason to meet each other again. Much to his disappointment.

Except for fact that Fate loved to mess with them, just waiting to strike at the young, blushing student and the stubborn, short lawyer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am going to be uploading chapters everyday if nothing will hinder me from doing so XD I'm just going to catch up with the chapters I have in FFn. Thanks for the kudos *bows*


	3. Fate Says Third Time's the Charm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Third time accidentally meeting each other ;)

**I don't own SnK**

* * *

 

_"One small crack does not mean that you are broken, it means that you were put to the test and you didn't fall apart."_

_-Linda Poindexter_

* * *

 

 **~Chapter Three: Fate Says Third Time's the Charm** ~

 

That week passed by like a blur and Eren didn't remember most of it. Except from those soft, feathery kisses that he'd shared with a certain short man.

The only reminder that it happened was the constant visits he got from Hanji, her always appearing in her painting class uninvited and stirring up quite a fuss. Oh, and there was that cream-colored handkerchief, a piece of Levi's possession. Eren found the object, which lacked the omnipresence to tell him that he indeed forgot to give it back to Levi.

And he thought that he wouldn't be seeing him anytime soon.

The young man sighed loudly, placing his head on the drafting desk and grumbling at his luck. It wasn't like he didn't want to see Levi, because in fact, he _really_ wished to gaze upon that smirk on that man's face and the quirk in his eyebrow whenever he found something stupid. Eren felt his cheeks heat up at the thought—an image of Levi popping out in his head—and he let out whiny noises despite the fact that he was not the only one in the art room.

"What's been up in your ass these days?"

That familiar voice brought everything into a screeching halt. Eren's head snapped forward (he really was glad that he didn't get a stiff neck because of that) and he was faced with that recognizable long face and those intense light brown eyes.

"J-Jean..." he muttered weakly. Holy shit, he certainly didn't see this— _him_ —coming.

"What's up?" his ex-lover asked so casually to the point that Eren's blood started boiling at the sight of the man.

Jean Kirstein leaned back to the seat in front of Eren and he was wearing that playful smile on his face like it was the everyday routine; to disturb Eren in his classroom and ask him how was he doing. _Wow, fucking douchebag,_ the green-eyed lad thought as his mind went reeling with memories of him and this guy.

Eren hadn't thought of Jean that often during that week, too. The cause of that would be the constant intrusion of a certain black-haired man's picture in his head, like a bird that wouldn't just drown and kept on resurfacing on the waters of his thoughts.

"Do I know you?" Eren sassed back.

Jean looked genuinely taken aback, like he wasn't expecting a goddamn retort from Eren, and the latter couldn't help but snort at that.          His light ash brown hair swayed as Jean shook his head.

"Eren, look. I'm sorry about what happened last week and I know that it was out of the blue and I told you to wait for me—"

Uh. Yeah. NO. They were NOT gonna have this conversation right now.

"Jean," Eren looked at him square in the eye and fueled his gaze with enough intensity that would melt down a rock, and he continued, "go fuck yourself."

The brown-haired guy's mouth drop in shock and Eren could see that he was calculating a some type of a response to that, but he ended up spluttering some non-existent words. Eren grabbed his sketchbook, stood up and kicked his chair back to its place. The movement startled Jean out of his dumbfounded state and the guy began to walk after the leaving young man. He caught up to the brunet in the lobby just before he pushed the door; Jean grabbed his unoccupied hand. Looking down at those painted hands, he started to interweave them, much to Eren's surprise whose eyes went wide at the action. It made him turn and look at the brown-haired lad.

"I-It was a dare." Jean took a breath, not averting his eyes from their interlocked hands, and then he gave him a light squeeze.

"What...?"

"I was dared to break up with you," he explained more clearly. However, none of his words made sense to Eren, as he remained frozen on his position like Jean dumped an ice-cold bucket of water on him.

"What the fuck did you just say...?" The brunet's words contained no anger but the breathy question seemed more than enough to deliver the surprise of his mental state.

"I thought it was ridiculous! And I still think that it is the worst... I got mad and Reiner told me that I'm completely wrapped around your finger and then—"

Eren stopped him mid-sentence, roughly pulling his hand away from the offending ex-lover.

"You broke up with me because of a _dare_...?" His tone was enveloped with poisonous hatred and incredulity. Somewhere along the lines, Eren truly cared for Jean and even developed feelings for him during the time that they were together, which was only seven months but it was enough for Eren to experience the exultation of liking someone. And finding that the foundation of their relationship was weak enough that a simple _dare_ would crumble it to dust was blowing Eren's mind away.

"I-I-I was furious and I-I was motivated by anger, Eren. I planned on apologizing to you but I got caught up with some assignment. Eren, I swear that I'll make it up to you," Jean pleaded and attempted to take the brunet's hand but Eren backed away from him.

"You're a selfish bastard."

Hurt flashed across Jean's face.

"I know, I am. But, Eren—"

"Did you even love me? Care about me?" He didn't know why he asked that, but without the image of Levi, he was finally seeing what he had and what he had lost.

Jean's eyes watered and Eren didn't know if he still wanted to know the answer to his question. His deep feelings for the brown-eyed man had gradually faded away over time and the amusement park incident was the final push. He wasn't expecting his answer though, because it was the least anticipated response he wanted to hear from him.

"Yeah. I did. I cared about you and I loved you. I still do, Eren."

_Stop. You're just making things complicated._

"Ever since five years ago, that time when you lost your mom, I've only wanted to support you and be your friend but...it changed."

_No, nothing changed. You just pity me; you don't love me._

"When I got to go out with you, I found that loving you was almost the most natural thing to do—"

"Stop. You're the one who broke up with me, right? I said okay before you ended the line, so it was a mutual agreement," Eren said with hardened resolve.

No, Jean would not crumble his bubble now. He was the type of person to move on with life after encountering things and bad omens, because if he let them make him hesitate or stop, he would be the one hurting in the end. _No need to dwell in the past._

"Bye, Jean." And with that, Eren pushed the heavy, glass door and welcomed the breeze that passed by outside of the building. He didn't fail to hear Jean calling out after him, as he remained inside of the building with the door between him and Eren's back.

"Eren..."

 

* * *

 

The green-eyed college student leaned back against his swivel chair and the object groaned in the midst of the silence in his apartment. It was almost seven in the evening, and Eren was supposed to write a longass essay for his psychology class. Doing the activity deemed impossible because 1) his mind was completely blanking out and 2) he was waiting for the clock to tick away since he was supposed to go to Mikasa's house for dinner.

Finally giving up on writing the damn essay and on waiting, he stood up and grabbed his black jacket from the coat-hanger stand. He left his room, not bothering to look at his opened laptop, and went to grab his combat boots.

As he was tying his shoelaces, his mind wandered to his conversation with Jean. He knew him ever since high school—practically for eight years—and dating him was also part of his decision. He was harsh earlier and Eren thought of apologizing for being such an arse.

At that moment, he seemed to emphatically understand Jean's position.

_Anger brings out the worse of you._

And whoever said that anger also brought your honest side was wrong, because that certain emotion merely riled up the other bad aspects of you.

Eren closed his eyes to block out all of the other incoming thoughts and he shook his head to dispel the apprehension residing in his mind. He got up from the step he was sitting on and opened the door.

A dinner with his friend and her family would be a nice change...and a distraction.

 

* * *

 

Mikasa's mom was still the same with her eyes and her hair similar to her daughter. There was a spark of kindness behind those dark brown eyes, and her hands were calloused with the housework at home, an evidence of her being a mother. Her husband didn't change, except from the few grays that were starting to change his blond hair. Mikasa had her father's heart-shaped face and their temperament was also the same that sometimes when they got annoyed, Eren had to stifle a laugh. It was amusing how those two pairs of eyes narrow suspiciously or in irritation, and with a pair of eyebrows pulled down right on the middle of their foreheads.

"I wish I could eat your mom's food everyday," Eren said, sighing in contentment as he rubbed his now-bloated stomach.

Mikasa was sitting next to him on the couch and she swiveled around to look at him before saying, "Eren, you know that you're welcome here anytime. You can also move in with us."

The brunet shook his head but with a smile on his face. This family had been good to him ever since he became orphaned at the end of his high school days. They offered him food, clothes, shelter, and _love_ —things that he never asked from them but they gladly gave those things to him like he was their own son.

"I'm grateful, really."

A pause ensued. The voices from the flat screen TV were ignored and Eren could hear the clanking of the dishes in the kitchen, where Mikasa's parents were. Those were the sounds he heard in his everyday life for five years after his mom passed away.

"But I want to stand on my own Mikasa." That was the same response he told her when he decided to leave his second home. Eren wanted to be able to become independent; to become strong enough and hold his ground with his own power. There was that money from his parents' savings and he used that for what it was intended for—his college. He adamantly refused to take it at first, both surprised at the number of zeros in it and stubborn at that thought of contradicting himself since he said that he would stand on his own.

However, he remembered that his parents would want that for him. And the thought of disappointing them was enough to pierce his inflexible resolve, and he went to Trost University where he pursued arts.

Mikasa placed her hand on his forearm, and during these times that Eren thought Mikasa was more like his mom. It was a funny thought, really.

The doorbell buzzed and Mikasa shot up from her seat. She went to the kitchen and the green-eyed man vaguely heard them.

"Are you expecting someone?"

"Yeah. You should open it."

"I heard that he's an acquaintance of your dad. Please, open the door."

"M'kay."

His best friend came out and Eren felt awkward just sitting there like a lazy guest so he followed her. It had only been two years since he moved out but for this family, he was always part of this house no matter what.

He felt the presence of Mikasa's dad behind him and he raised a curious eyebrow to him.

"He's someone I know from years ago," he responded, offering a smile. Eren shrugged and nodded his head like "Okay." He was suddenly interested in the little turtle paddling in the aquarium at the corner of the living room. His lips tugged upwards as he remembered the day Armin, Mikasa, and him had acquired the sea creature. It was the first time they went to the beach and a visit to the aquarium followed suit. They were seventeen back then and five years had already passed. That was probably the happiest day of his life ever since his mom died.

"Levi!"

The sudden outburst from Mikasa's dad caused Eren's head to whip towards their guest. His eyes widened comically as the oh-godly-handsome-man who had been haunting him in his night and day dreams, had somehow manifested inside of Mikasa's house. It didn't help that the older man's gray eyes reflected the equal surprise in it, and Eren would have laughed at those lips slight hanging agape if not for the fact that Mikasa _would_ hang the short man upside down if she found out about their not-even-budding relationship.

"Hello, Mr. Ackerman. I haven't seen you in so long," Levi said politely, snapping out of his trance.

"I was surprised to hear the news that you came back from Japan! I was glad that Erwin called and told me about it. I hope that inviting you for a late dinner wouldn't be too much of a trouble," the blond-haired man said.

_Oh god. Didn't we just eat?_

"This is my daughter, Mikasa (She gave a small nod to him and vice versa). And this is Eren, mmm, our child as well, you could say." He gave a throaty laugh and something swelled in Eren's chest in those words.

"H-Hi."

He faced Levi and offered a hand to shake. The older man took the hint and they shook hands as if they never met before. The spark was back, though. And it was something that ran through their veins and made Eren jumped. Even Levi was surprised and they jerked their hands away. There was a small portion of warmth that remained and Eren caught Levi smoothing his expression back to the usual indifference.

Eren's emerald orbs trailed Levi's actions from the time he slipped off his shoes and properly put it on the side, and to the point when he put away his light jacket, leaving him for Eren to admire. He was wearing black slacks and a dark blue button-up shirt, and Eren felt totally _not-so_ -mature with his faded jeans and Pikachu shirt. He had his head downcast, stealing glances to the older male who seemed to be heeding no attention to him as he chatted away with Mikasa's dad.

When they arrived at the dining table, the blond-haired man looked curiously at Eren and Mikasa.

"You don't have to eat again. We're just gonna catch up with each other," he informed them.

For some reason, Eren wanted to stay. It had been a week and some days since he last saw the gray-eyed man and he really wanted to stay and talk to him, too. But the situation would definitely get worse since Mikasa's eyes were already narrowing in suspicion. And he was right, because she totally cornered him when they went to the living room.

"Do you know that man? Why do you seem so shocked? Where did you meet him? When? Was it the amusement part? Oh, _holy_ —"

"Mikasa," Eren cut her off, not wanting to further arise her conjecture. He bit back his tongue as he contemplated whether to tell her the truth or not. His mouth ran off before he could even stop it, "He broke my phone."

His black-haired friend stopped to think and Eren really thought how much he hated the fact that she could read body language.

"Oh. Did he fix it?"

"Yeah. We accidentally met up because of Hanji, she's from Biology department, and then he gave me back, err... a brand new phone."

"...Why would he give you a new phone?"

"He's a lawyer."

"So he's rich. He's not your sugar—"

"Oh, for heaven's sake! NO!" Eren exclaimed, eyes widening at the idea. The thought of itself was ridiculous and Levi being his sugar daddy would totally ruin his perfect image of him!

"Good. Well, if he's dad's friend, then maybe he's not at all that bad," Mikasa decided at the end. Eren held his tongue from saying more, like _Yeah! He agreed with our not-so-much-but-looked-like-it date, even went to rides and ended up throwing up for MY sake._ But he couldn't tell her that. Admiring a stranger after a day of spending time with him was...not right. But it was _not_ wrong either.

 

* * *

 

After an hour of watching random TV shows, Levi and Mikasa's dad left the dining room.

"Thank you for coming, Levi."

"It was no problem. It's nice seeing you again."

The childhood friends rose from the couch and were about to see Levi out when Mikasa's dad stopped abruptly.

"Oh! I didn't tell you, did I, Mikasa?" he exclaimed.

"Tell me what?" Mikasa asked, scrunching her eyebrows in confusion.

"Levi is a distant relative. He's an Ackerman and we only found out about that a few years back." He laughed like it was a hilarious prank. However, Mikasa didn't look amused.

"Huh?" She simply mumbled. She took the opportunity to seize up Levi, and Eren did the same. The two of them shared the same color of their hair but other than that, Eren didn't see any similarities.

Then, the brunet saw it.

The intensity of their glares were equal to a wolf fastening its eyes on its prey, and he remembered the day he met Levi; he made him cry with a simple you'll-pay-for-this-you-brat look. The young man couldn't hold back the laugh that threatened to bubble from him after that memory resurfaced. Before he knew it, he was already clutching his stomach and doubling forward. Mikasa's dad also burst in hysterics. He probably saw what he saw, too.

"What's so damn funny, brat?" He heard Levi asked in irritation. The green-eyed man ceased my laughter, wiping a tear from the corner of his eye and grinning to them.

"Because you guys are so alike."

"No, we don't," they said in synchronization but this time, the brunet held back his laugh. Eren saw them glare at each other afterwards and he wondered if it was their charisma that drew him towards these two people.

It was already 11 and Eren was barely aware of the time so upon seeing the clock, he scrambled out of the living room and put on his jacket. He wore his paint-stained Converse sneakers. _Oh shit. I have to finish that damn essay!_

"Eren? Are you going back?" he heard Mikasa's mother called out.

"Yeah! I have to finish an essay and I'm probably gonna stay up for it," he answered back.

Levi, Mikasa and her family were now in front of him. He was trying not to look at Levi a bit closely because he didn't want to give away anything to Mikasa. He received hugs from his second _parents_ and Mikasa tightened her hold on him when it was her turn.

"You should stay the night here."

"No, it's fine. Thank you for the delicious food," he said softly. The warmth of the house enveloped him and the sudden urge for his tears to spill out of his eyes came to him. He closed his eyes and quickly wiped them away before Mikasa pulled away to see him.

"I'll drive you home," Levi suddenly spoke that it startled everyone. The sudden suggestion made Eren happy and even if Mikasa didn't like the idea, she seemed to comply to it because her priority was Eren's safety.

"Please do, Levi. Thank you," Mikasa's dad said, smiling gratefully.

He left the smiling family and the cold wind instantly hit him, making him shiver. There was still that warmth, though, inside him and it was the only thing he could hold onto as the wind blew towards his direction.

"Cold?" the shorter man asked. He didn't wait for Eren to reply as he pulled a blue scarf from the inside pocket of his jacket. They stopped before his silver car and Levi gently put the scarf around Eren's neck, successfully bundling him up and hiding his mouth away from the sight. Those gray eyes wandered around his face until they settled on his green eyes.

"Get in," Levi commanded, still not taking his eyes off Eren. However, they had to break their contact in order to get in the car. Once inside, Levi heated up the car which gradually soothed the numbing hands which Eren was rubbing together for more friction. Once comfortable, they sped away and Levi didn't have to ask Eren's address the second time.

They arrived at Eren's apartment and the young man was awake this time. During the ride, there was only a silence between them but it was strangely comfortable. Now, though, was a different story.

"You don't have a car?" the older male asked.

"No, I don't," Eren shook his head. He then added, "I was supposed to take my driver's test when I turn 18 until it got postponed. Well, it gets postponed every time I make an appointment."

Levi stopped, deep in thought, then he asked, "Then, whose car are you going to take when you get your license?"

It made the brunet smile. Levi seemed so concerned about him even if it was only a trivial matter. It made Eren want to be honest with him.

"My mom bought me a car and it was supposed to be a surprise gift from her. It's not brand new but I want to drive it," he told him.

Levi's lips twitched, repressing a smile. He was right about Eren—he was an honest brat. He lifted his hand and looked at him idly, his hand was softly placed on Eren's brown locks. He patted his head like a gesture of rewarding him of something, feeling the softness of the strands of his hair. Eren found that a bit endearing. Levi might looked like a rough man but he certainly was a gentle person towards Eren (minus that first terrifying exchange between them).

His train of thoughts led him to remember something. A certain object that sat on top of his desk.

"Oh! I forgot to give your handkerchief. Let me go get it and—" Eren was cut off by the older male.

"Give it to me next time," Levi told him. Eren didn't know what to make out of that; it was either he was just lazy or...

"S-So, we're going to meet up?" the brunet asked, keeping away the hopeful tone from his voice deemed to be a little more difficult than he thought it would be.

"Mhmm. Yeah," he replied to him. Levi looked at him with that unhidden curiosity and the younger man had the desire to stay in the car and talk to the no-longer-stranger for hours until the crack of the dawn. If only that was possible.

"You should go in, brat. Even if your mom lets you live by yourself—"

 _Lets_. Eren couldn't ignore the fact that Levi addressed his mom in a present tense and before he knew it, his mouth was already moving before his brain could even process what he just said.

"My mom can't do that anymore. She's dead."

Tension that wasn't present before between them was now hanging in the thin space of air around them. The stillness was unnerving and the younger man regretted that he opened his mouth. He didn't know what prompted him to tell Levi something so personal, and it scared him because he _wanted_ to tell him everything. He wanted to make Levi that special person.

"No, she's not," Levi said softly, breaking the entrapping silence in the car. "Isn't she still alive in your heart, Eren?"

Eren was surprised at his name coming from the lips of the man who cast a mysterious spell on him. He suddenly wanted to cry. Nobody ever asked him that question or even conjectured up that idea...not in a really long time. Levi seemed to give him unexpected things since the day they met and at that point, Eren realized it.

He grasped the possibility that he might fall in love with Mr. Stranger. Upon the realization, instead of the usual blush that would creep onto his cheeks, it was fear that gripped his heart and made it difficult to breathe.

"I-I have to go," the brunet said, breaking the spell. He was scrambling to get out of the car, clumsily trying to remove his seatbelt. He heard a sigh from Levi and the black-haired man removed his seatbelt and leaned over to Eren to take off his.

"I'm sorry, if I said something that offended you," the man apologized and Eren halted in his futile efforts in removing the damn thing off him to look at Levi.

"Why are you apologizing? I-It's just me. It was... I'm just fucking confused," he admitted with bitterness in his tone. He ran a hand through his hair, showing his growing frustration. What was it that confused him? What was it that was making his head pound with foreboding thoughts?

It was always like that whenever he was trying to remember his mom. And now...

"What?" Levi asked, not bothering to mask his own confusion. He successfully removed the offending thing off Eren but the younger man did not attempt to get out this time around.

"I got dumped because of a dare. My best friend wants to pamper me and she wants me to live with her and her family. I'm grateful but I feel like I need to do _something_. Then, you," Eren turned his gaze on Levi to emphasize his point and continued, " _you_ happened. Like, every time I'm with you I feel like... like I get ran over by a bus."

The gray-eyed man rolled his eyes at him and said, "Speak in something I can comprehend. Because I will assume that my presence instantly kills you every time."

"Exactly," the brunet said, which further deepened the furrow between Levi's eyebrows. "I mean, I feel like I'm... invisible. I've been living my life the same way since five years ago, then when you came, it's been turned upside down. And I feel like... _something_ is gonna happen."

"We've met _three_ times. And all of them are coincidental, brat," the shorter man pointed out, oblivious as to what his statement could mean.

Eren just looked at him and Levi, not understanding what point he was making, simply stared back. After a minute of a heated staring contest, Eren shrugged and that was when Levi caught on.

"I can't fucking believe it. Of course, a crybaby like you—"

"HEY!"

"—believes in Fate. Well, I'll tell you what."

"...What?"

"I don't believe in that magical shit. I believe in opportunities and chances, but not in myth—"

"OKAY! Geez, forget it."

"—No, because I don't think you understand, brat."

"Stop calling me that..."

"I didn't fucking believe it until I fucking met you and saw your goddamned beautiful eyes."

That final statement stopped Eren in what-in-the-seven-hells he was saying, making his mouth open comically. His eyes seemed to bulge out of their sockets and he swallowed the thick lump in his throat. He saw Levi's neck turning red, and that said a lot about a man whose skin was comparable to the snow.

"Go now before I really ravish you here in this car," Levi said, voice was husky enough to send shivers down Eren's spine and it made him snap forward and clutter out of the silver vehicle. Once he was out though, his feet remained rooted on the ground like he was waiting for Levi to say something else, because it looked like his conversational skills were impaired at the moment.

The gray-eyed man didn't fail and his words flowed through those pink lips.

"You're welcome to run away, but I promise I'll be on your fucking trail because I don't want to miss my chances. Goodnight, brat."

If it was possible, the deep shade of red on Eren's face further brightened like a color of a ripe tomato.

"Wait, c'mere," Levi suddenly interjected and the younger male couldn't help but comply, as if he was under a powerful compulsion. He peeked inside the car through the rolled-down window, his head was poking inside and he was averting his eyes from the man who was causing him to have butterflies in his stomach.

"You're always welcome to call me when you feel like you're having a shitty day," Levi stated. At that statement, Eren properly looked at him and their eyes locked together until he processed what was just said.

"Huh?"

"Tsk. Are you shitting me, brat? You haven't seen my name in your contacts, have you?" Disbelief was clearly in his voice and Eren took out his unscratched phone from his jacket's pocket. Scrolling down his list, he unquestionably saw the name "Levi" and he felt stupid for not even bothering to check any changes in his data.

"You didn't change anything else, did you?" he asked, unsure if he really should be asking that question when the man was already generous enough to do everything for him; buy him a mad expensive phone and transfer what needs to be transferred.

"No."

"Okay."

"Well? Say your piece now."

Uh. Eren clearly didn't know what to say, but he remembered his manners and said, "Thank you for driving me home."

Levi didn't immediately reply to that but he said, "I wasn't talking about that, but you're welcome."

"Wait. What do you mean, then?!"

"Not telling you."

Eren felt a little bold and curious so he opened the car door and let half of his body inside. He had the urge to tease the older male who seemed arrogant enough to leave Eren confused and unanswered in their every little encounter. So he did what he thought of.

The brunet leaned closer to that flawless face of Levi and his nose caught a whiff of vanilla scent with a mix of a manly smell, before he rubbed his nose gently to the lobe of Levi's ear. He felt him shudder and it fueled Eren's desire to venture the effects he had on the man.

"If it's fate, I have no complaints," Eren whispered, tone was low and seductive in Levi's ears. His companion let out a low and almost-inconspicuous growl, but Eren heard it loud and clear.

His desires. His affection. And his growing impatience.

And then he went inside the apartment in a blinding speed, refusing to let Levi catch him.

For the first time, he felt like he was up high in the sky with blood drumming in his ears and his heart free to throb for someone. It was intoxicating. Breathtaking.

That feeling didn't last, though, as Eren's eyes fell upon his open laptop.

"SHIT! MY ESSAY!"

Unbeknownst to him, Levi was still outside of his apartment, looking at the now-lit window and thinking of how this day brought them together again. For _the third time._

"That brat will be the death of me," he mumbled in surrender and he finally sped away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow..well..That's a bit cliche and OC on Levi's part (maybe...) LOL XD what do you guys think?


	4. Home Cooked Meal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A bizarre love triangle. Eren finds himself inviting Levi to his apartment.

**I don't own SnK**

* * *

 

_It hurt because it mattered._

_-John Green_

* * *

 

**~Chapter Four: Home Cooked Meal~**

 

_"Eren."_

_Those light brown eyes had the spark of kindness in them, and he felt comforted upon gazing those orbs._

_"Come here. Let me give you a hug."_

_Her black hair fell past her shoulders, and there was an affectionate smile presented on her lips. Happiness overflowed from her whole being, and he couldn't help but reach out his arms and wrap them around her shoulders._

_"Mom."_

_"Mhm. I love you, Eren. Always and forever."_

"Mom."

Eren's sea-green eyes snapped open and the white ceiling came into his view. No smiling face of her mother. No wrinkles around her eyes when she tried to envelop him in her warmth. He sat up on his bed, unaware that there were droplets of porcelain tears running down on his cheeks. His eyes fell on the picture frame by his bedside table.

It was a photo taken after he got into high school. He had an arm slung around his mother's shoulders and she was holding onto him by his waist. Bliss was displayed by their big smiles. It made Eren become aware of the lack of warmth in his apartment; he couldn't even call it his home.

The clock said that it was just seven in the morning, but there was probably no way that Eren could fall back asleep now. So he got out of his bed and put a dark green hoodie on; he would always sleep without a shirt on and going naked outside in the middle of April would only result to the common cold. He spent a few minutes in his bathroom before leaving his empty dwelling.

A good jog would be the best distraction as of now.

The neighborhood didn't change since he moved to the apartment complex two years ago; Marco's house was still down the block, the granny who kept swatting at the invisible bugs was already up, the children who usually played in the streets or went out to the park, were still asleep—Eren remembered them all, the people outside his lonely world.

"Hey, Eren!" He heard a familiar voice called out to him as he jogged past a light blue house. He strode backwards until the same freckled guy came into his view.

"Hey, Marco. Up so early?" he greeted him, trying to sound upbeat.

"Uh, actually I'm just about to sleep. Stayed up to do some work like, Shadis just _loves_ to torture us." Marco yawned, bending his neck to crack it.

"Tell me about it. I had to stay until five in the morning just for one essay." Oh, how he _loved_ college. Majoring in art still wouldn't let him escape those bothersome alternative classes.

"Oh, that one from few days ago?"

"Yup."

"That was hell."

"Uh-huh."

"Good thing we don't have any assignments the following week, 'cause I really wanna work on my painting. Have you thought of what do you wanna do yet?"

Eren shook his head and said, "I'll try to find some inspiration, I guess. I don't wanna hand in some shitty artwork."

"Shitty artwork? Are you kidding me, Jaeger?! You got a spot in the gallery last month!"

"M-Mhm, well." He really wasn't the type of a person to boast about his work since he merely enjoyed being on the sidelines and watching people wonder about his art. He couldn't possibly tell them what was going on in his head—they would probably have a heart attack.

Marco yawned again and Eren told him to go inside and sleep. The other man didn't complain and he bid Eren goodbye before his wooden door shut close. And once again, there was peace and quiet surrounding Eren. He resumed his activity, passing by the park nearby and heading towards the street of where he worked at. Mike's Bakery was now open since it was already eight, and he really wanted to go grab some cheese-strawberry-filled croissant before he head towards the cafe across the street. It suddenly reminded him of a certain gray-eyed man.

"Hey, Eren. You're up so early," Mike greeted him. The sweet smell of bread and other available pastries filled Eren's nostrils and he wanted to sit down and just inhale the intoxicating smell. But he had to stay awake, because he needed to find this so-called-inspiration for his assignment.

He scratched his head, feeling icky when his hand came in contact with the sweat plastered on his dark fringes. He then said, "Bad dreams. And need to find some kind of an inspiration for my art."

"You always do that, don't you? Last time, you made a drawing of this bakery. I hope you'll show me what's gonna be your next subject," the older man said. The green-eyed man couldn't help but smile because Mike had been so nice to him, even before he started working here.

"Sure. Oh for work, I'll probably be available tomorrow afternoon so I'll come in here," he informed him.

"That's fine. Customers usually come in before ten and in the afternoon."

Mike handed him his bread and Eren happily took it. He paid Mike as he took his first bite, groaning at the usual buttery taste that he loved. The sweetness of the strawberry with the cheese just rightly balanced the bread. Oh, how he would love to have this every morning.

"I'm gonna get my coffee across the street. See ya." Eren gave a wave as he finished his last bite and Mike returned his gesture with a small smile on his face.

Eren jogged across the street, glad that there were only a couple of cars passing by. He pulled the door of the cafe open and he suddenly remembered that this was one of the places where he accidentally encountered Levi. There was something special with those meetings and it made Eren blush upon recalling them. He went inside and was about to go to the counter when he saw one of his friends. Well, douchebag friends, apparently.

It was Reiner. The sight of the blond-haired guy reminded Eren of what Jean told him—that it was Reiner who dared him to break up with him. He was about to turn his heels away, but the blonde shit just had to call out to him so casually that it made Eren's eyes narrow in anger.

"Eren! Hey! Aren't you gonna buy something?"

He had no choice but to turn back. He couldn't possibly continue his walking out of the shop because that would just prove that he was running away. And Eren didn't want that. He had to show that he was no guy who they could just toss around for their mere _games_.

"Coffee. Two creamers and two sugars," the green-eyed man coldly told the cashier.

"Coming right up. $3.59, please." He gave him the money and got back his change, and the brunet thought Reiner wouldn't bother to say anything. But he was wrong. So wrong and he wanted to punch the blond dude for it.

"Hey. Y-You see, Jean and I talked yesterday. He was so mad, like dude, he was furious. And I'm so fucking sorry about what happened—"

Eren cut him off, "I don't care. Just give me my damn coffee."

"Oh my god, Eren. You don't understand. Jean, he—"

"Look," the brunet snapped, "I DO understand that he was a fucking egoistic bastard and that it was you who gave that shitty dare. So don't tell me that I DON'T fucking understand. I DO understand that it was a mutual break-up."

The fact that he just had an outburst should've made him at least a bit frightened because Reiner was like, twice his size. The blond-haired guy was tall and muscular; Eren wouldn't stand a chance against him. However, the big man merely shook his head like he was saying 'such a waste' and Eren was about to flip his shit but stopped when the #1 person in his I-don't-want-to-see list just came in through the effin' door.

"Oh god. What the hell," he grumbled incredulously under his breath as his eyes met Jean's surprised light brown eyes. Reiner, the supposedly huge guy made an audible squeak and immediately went to work for Eren's coffee.

The silence in the cafe was already deafening and now, the tension was up high and thick enough to be slashed by a knife. Eren wanted nothing but to get out of the hellhole.

"Eren," Jean uttered softly, and the said person couldn't bear to look at him any longer.

Is my coffee done?" he gritted out between his teeth, ignoring the ashbrown-haired man behind him. Reiner responded with a stuttered 'o-one sec' and all the brunet could do was to impatiently tap his sneaker on the polished floor. He heard steps and he knew that Jean was walking closer to him.

"H-How are you?" the poor guy stammered.

Eren closed his eyes. _I decided to stop being a dick to him. C'mon!_ He turned around, and the other man was mildly surprised that he unconsciously backed away. He probably thought that Eren would lash out to him. He couldn't blame him since he could be an arse when he was driven with anger.

"Sorry. And I'm fine," he responded with an edge on his voice. Well, it was certainly hard to get rid of his remaining animosity towards his ex-boyfriend. On the other hand, Jean's face lit up like a freaking Christmas tree, about to open his mouth, and Eren couldn't thank Reiner's timing enough.

"Your coffee, Eren." He handed him his coffee and the green-eyed student finally breathed out a sigh of relief because he could finally get out of that suffocating place. He really wasn't expecting that encounter—he was supposed to have a peaceful and an inspiring morning, like c'mon!

And as if his routine was not ruined enough, person #1 on his I-wanna-see-list came through the door. Like, what the hell?!

Levi decided to make an appearance just when he was about to walk towards the exit passageway of his hellhole. Well, couldn't this day get any worse?

The brunet locked eyes with the shorter man as the latter made his way inside the cafe. Eren couldn't move from his spot and he was painfully aware that Jean and Reiner behind him were boring holes on his back. Levi continued to stroll towards him before he completely stopped right _in front_ of him.

The unmoving young man started making faces and signals using his eyes to Levi and the older man either didn't get his signs, _or_ he was totally teasing him.

"Well, how are you, _Eren_?" he asked ever-so-sweetly that Eren's knees went soft at the sound of his name rolling on his tongue.

"H-Hi, Levi. I... I was just jogging and getting my early breakfast," he stuttered dumbly, his mind clicking at the difference between his response to Jean and to the person in front of him now.

"Mhm," Levi turned to Reiner, eyes swiping to the cashier's face and to the long-faced guy before saying, "Can I get an espresso here?"

Reiner was confused, following the order anyway, and Jean's eyes were narrowing into slits, considering the situation at hand. Eren knew that he wasn't the brightest bulb but there was that fact that the guy was pursuing law and was actually one of the best students; so it would be no wonder if he figured out that something was going on between him and Levi.

"Well, Eren, _dear,_ you should definitely tell me when you feel like doing something. You know that my name is still under your contacts, _right_?" Levi stated so calmly, but his smirk told a different story. Yeah, that expression was sexy as hell but Eren was flabbergasted as to how the older male was using freaking endearment to him right now. He was _totally_ teasing him! He didn't fail to catch the underlying threat of his last question because it was true—Eren still hadn't gather up his courage to call Levi.

The brunet felt his phone digging in his ribs and he gingerly took it out, the pair of earphones that was still connected dropped on the floor and he clumsily tried to put it back in his hoodie pocket.

"Uh. I'll keep that in mind," Eren said softly and he whispered to the gray-eyed man, "But why are you here?!"

"Getting my coffee," the other answered plainly and as if to prove his point, Reiner gave his cup of espresso and paid him. He casually strode back to Eren and _of course_ , Jean just had to say something.

"...Are you his friend?" The direction was directly to Levi and Eren cursed his timing.

"...You could say that," the shorter male replied.

_What's up with the pause anyway?!_

"I've known Eren since high school, and I don't know he'd ever mention having a friend like you," Jean stated, emphasizing the word 'friend' with some underlying tone.

"Jean—" Eren tried to interject but Levi beat him to it.

"Well, I certainly don't see why is this any of your business."

The brown-eyed guy looked a bit taken aback but regained his composure as he scrutinized Levi from head to toe, and Eren could practically hear his gears turning as he tried to find some comeback. His almost-constipated-look was the evidence of it.

"If you have nothing else to say then I'll take _my_ Eren since we have _a lot_ to discuss. Right, _dear?_ " The green-eyed student didn't know what response to give to that so he let Levi grab his wrist to finally drag him away from the blasted place.

"Wait."

Jean's own hand shot up and wrapped itself around Eren's other hand—not his wrist, but his _hand_. It seemed a silly thing to think about but Eren could practically see electric sparks flying everywhere and a freaking thundercloud would've possibly manifest right above them. Blood rushed to his face and he could feel his heart hammering loudly against his chest. He didn't fail to see that Levi's wolfish glare was back and was fixed on Jean's own glare, which was one level feeble compared to the older male.

"Let him go," Jean ordered, eyebrows were pulled together as if concentrating his willpower not to stammer in front of his rival. Reiner had somehow disappeared through the backroom and Eren certainly realized that he was all alone in this now.

"Why would I?" Levi asked, also determined not to lose and to prove that, his grip tightened around Eren's. His silver eyes became stormy as they fell on Jean's hold around Eren's hand. Oh, he just did _not_...

"Because I am—"

"What? His lover? Last time I checked, some asshole ended things with Eren."

"What did you say?!"

"And it was because of a shitty dare. Really. That's _low_ ," the shorter man growled. A look of anger flashed across his face. And even if it was merely a glimpse, Eren was ten times scared of that expression than the one that he saw the first time they met each other.

With that last counter, Jean's grip loosened on Eren's until it dropped on his side. His head was downcast and the green-eyed lad couldn't see his face or those familiar brown eyes. The shorter man took that opportunity to leave the cafe, pulling Eren alongside him and not stopping until they reached the silver Maserati. Levi told him to go inside and the brunet complied, not really wanting to stay there any longer. Once they were inside though, Levi was the one who broke their silence first.

"Was that your ex?"

The taller man just nodded. He couldn't tell Levi that guilt was clutching his heart as the image of the defeated figure of the ashbrown-haired guy kept flashing before his eyes. He didn't want to admit that he was too soft on almost everyone—that he couldn't bear to hold grudges.

That would make him look weak.

"Sorry."

It startled Eren to hear Levi apologize because he should be the one apologizing. Not him.

"The reason I pulled you away was because that horse-face was fucking irritating me. He had a vice grip on you even though you're not fucking his," the gray-eyed man admitted, bitterness in his voice.

The green-eyed man was surprised to hear that since he was not used to this side of Levi. Levi, who always maintained his cool no matter what, was actually admitting that he was bothered by someone. Mind you, this was the same man who made him look like a crybaby in the amusement park.

Oh, how he kept going back to that day.

"Did you just call him horse-face?" A grin broke out on his face.

"Yeah, got a problem with that, brat?"

The brunet couldn't help but chuckle, but his eyes turned serious once again.

"I... wanna hear him out. But I don't think I'll get back with him anymore," Eren explained, gazing forward as Levi switched gears and proceeded to drive.

"You better not, brat." It was faint but Eren caught that statement from Levi and it made him red on the face.

"Why are you there anyway?" he asked, changing the topic.

It took a moment for the older male to respond and he said, "I like their coffee." Now, that was one thing they had in common.

"Me too," the younger man agreed, a grin making its way on his face.

"I didn't know you go on morning jogs."

Eren bashfully scratched his cheek and mumbled, "I still wanna be fit, you know."

"I thought you're like those weirdos who never gain weight no matter how much of a pig they are." Well, no-filtered Levi was certainly back.

"I'm not a weirdo, geez. I'm looking for an inspiration for my art, too."

"Oh? I don't think you'll find it in a pissed-filled neighborhood."

Eren face-palmed himself after he figured out what category Levi belonged to.

"You're one clean freak, aren't you?" he asked, though it was unnecessary. He couldn't believe that he missed that detail about the black-haired man. Who wouldn't? Levi allowed himself to puke after a day at the amusement park and he also lent Eren his handkerchief.

Oh. Wait.

"Aren't you gonna take back your handkerchief? I washed it, you know," he told him. Something clicked in his mind and he thought, _Oh wow. I should've figured by that time he rejected to take back his hanky. He would've burned the object, but I don't think he would've touched it to begin with._

His thoughts were broken when Levi answered, "Yeah. Pick it up from your place; I have nothing to do anyway."

It only took a few minutes before they arrived in front of Eren's apartment building, and as Levi cut off the engine, Eren finally realized what was going to happen. He had two delicate options: 1) he could just go get the handkerchief and make Levi wait for him to come out or 2) he could invite him inside. The lad was leaning towards the second option and by the heavens, how he knew what would be the consequences of that. However, he didn't want to be rude towards the certain man, especially since he already owed him many favors.

So he chose the most dangerous option.

They headed towards apartment 0845 and Eren introduced Levi to his place, shrugging off his sneakers and was about to tug off his hoodie when he remembered that he wasn't alone in the room, and that he had no shirt underneath. That was close.

"Do you even know how to clean your own place, brat? It's a wonder how haven't you suffocated yet with this amount of dust," the shorter man complained as he went inside the living room.

Oh, his clean-freak level was absolutely exceeding Eren's assumption.

"I'm only alone in the house so... I just clean what I see," he replied a little weakly.

Eren blinked, suddenly feeling something was odd—like oddly _small_. It was like his apartment was ten times narrower than before, letting him feel a bit ashamed in front of Levi. The older male paid no heed to it, though, as if he never noticed anything. The brunet came to the revelation that it was probably because his place wasn't really designed for another person besides from him.

He never thought of how lonely it was, until Levi walked in.

Mikasa and Armin had been there a couple of times but he rarely got that feeling of isolation or degradation because those two managed to keep him away from those thoughts. With Levi though...

It was like he was able to feel the need of a companion in the house, and he wondered why would he feel that way towards a man whom he had just known for a short span of two weeks.

"Aren't you even gonna serve some breakfast?" Levi demanded, his tone was obnoxiously laughable that it made Eren snicker a bit.

"Yes, yes. Would you like some ramen?"

The gray-eyed man's mouth dropped and his eyes glinted with some bloody scary intent. It was so out of the blue that Eren wondered what he had just said wrong.

"Have you been eating right, brat?"

"Eh?"

"Don't tell me... You've only eaten ramen...?

"Uh... sometimes I eat at the bakery or order Chinese food..."

"Oh for the love of—" Levi planted his face on his palm for a moment and then he looked at Eren and asked, "Kitchen. Where is it?"

The younger man timidly pointed to the direction of his kitchen, which was already visible so Levi probably just had the urge to be polite. His guest was quick to his refrigerator and the intimidating look on his face certainly intensified and he could feel chills on his spine as Levi's glare turned to him.

"Wh-What?"

"You don't have food."

"I-I have juice..."

"Hah?!"

"...And apples."

The shorter man strode towards him in three steps and Eren backed away towards his brown couch until his knees buckled and he fell on the cushioned object headfirst.

"Ooof!"

"Dumbass, what are you doing? I'm taking you to the supermarket," Levi declared, dark aura enveloped him and Eren tried to sit up and defend himself. His guest was totally scaring him off; he gulped loudly and the next thing he knew, he was being pulled out of his living room and out of his apartment, towards that silver car of Mr. Clean Freak.

Why did he even think that his second option was dangerous?

They got to the grocery store in no time and Eren decided to keep his mouth since Levi had gone into papa-mode, or mama-mode if he were allowed to muse. Oh, he could feel that it was going to be a long day.

 

* * *

 

It was already eight in the evening. The day, without a doubt, had passed like a blur but for Eren, it felt like it was long enough to make him want to sleep forever.

How did a simple encounter at the cafe become a day to spend with Levi, that—he didn't even know.

His supposedly-guest had practically dragged him in the grocery store, picking vegetables and meat and other necessities that Eren didn't find the need to buy (like a vacuum...). The worse was he certainly felt guilty because the money for all of those expenses came from the lawyer's card. The only thing that he paid for, with a great amount of force exerted, was the pizza they had for lunch.

Now...

_Why is Levi wearing an apron in front of the stove and cooking dinner?_

The fact that the apron that the older man was wearing had this rabbit design was supposed to be ridiculous, but Eren's thoughts were running wild. He thought of Levi's delicate hand on the spatula and a wine on the other. The way his ass was—

_Ah, shit. Stop it, Eren Jaeger._

He shook his head and was pulled back to reality, which was him sitting at the table with two plates already set and a couple of cups ready. The sight of it was very nostalgic and it made him recall his dream this morning.

His mom would usually wake up early in the morning to prepare breakfast for him, even if he already told her that he didn't like eating anything during that time of the day. She would scold him and tell him that it was supposed to be the important meal of the day, then he would eat his food anyway. His lunchbox was ready before he went to school, too, and he would give her a kiss on the cheek before he left the house. After school, he would help with the laundry and other household chores before doing his homework. His mom would then call out for him and tell him that the dinner was ready.

_"Eren. Come down and eat."_

"Eren. It's done. Now eat, brat."

Levi's voice broke his trance and he realized how directly he was staring at Levi who was standing in front of him with two plates of the delicious-looking steaks. He set them down on the table and Eren scrambled out of his seat to get some rice. As he scraped out some rice for him and for the older male, he felt like there was a lump in his throat that refused to go down. There was that squeezing feeling in his heart, too. He couldn't get rid of the ache and the more he thought about it, the more the tears in his eyes were threatening to spill.

He tried to compose himself and then he settled down on his seat, noticing that Levi was pouring some white wine for himself and giving Eren some apple cider.

"I'm legal, you know," he reminded him.

"I know, but you're still a brat. Already crying when you still haven't taste my food," the gray-eyed man retorted.

"I'm not!" the brunet quickly wiped away the invisible tears that haven't even fell yet. He suddenly felt exposed; it felt like Levi could see right through him and he didn't want him to see what turmoil was building inside him.

After admiring the pleasantly presented food right in front of him, he went to dig in. The taste of the steak burst in his mouth and made him hungry for more. He was unaware that Levi was staring at him the whole time, though there was that prickling sensation that he got.

"T-This is delicious! Totally different from any take-outs!" he exclaimed, a bright smile made its way on his face.

"It IS the best, you brat. Don't even compare my food with those fucking grease-filled take-outs."

He laughed. He couldn't help it. A companion in the house for the first time in like a year, and a home-cooked meal right in front of him. Those two things have been deprived of him ever since he decided to move out from the Ackerman's house. And ironically, another Ackerman was filling the space in.

Warmth spread from his mouth and to his whole body, and his chest felt like it would cave in because there were several swirling emotions that have been brought by his memories. One by one, tears escaped from his eyes but his smile never left its place.

"Is it that good that it's making you cry?" Levi asked, his voice had an edge of sarcasm but Eren saw through it. There was concern and gentleness on the usual indifferent mask of Levi, and Eren's cheeks turned pink a little.

"Mm. Y-yeah," he replied, silently sobbing and he watched as his tears fell on the tablecloth.

There was silence that ensued afterwards, and the green-eyed lad was more than glad to have that because it calmed him down. After dinner, he went to his room and grabbed the familiar handkerchief that had been sitting on his desk for two weeks. He really did clean it after his second encounter with Levi, and that was the smartest idea he thought of since he knew now that the certain man didn't really tolerate dirt.

"Here," he handed him the said object and Levi looked up to him. They were standing in the middle of the hallway that led to the front door. The older man slowly took his possession back from Eren and he let himself become lost in those sea-green eyes.

"I'll...cook for you, again."

The younger man's mouth opened in surprise and he tried for any signs of just... _anything_ on the older man's face, but his stoic facade was already up. He rubbed the nape of his neck, embarrassed at their current situation.

"You don't have to—"

"I want to."

He searched those gray eyes again, trying to find the reason why would he go that far for him. A simple trick of fate wasn't enough and Eren knew that. One would have to start caring and it was hard to figure out things because Levi wasn't exactly the expressive type of a person.

"Why?" He breathed out.

The other man didn't hesitate one bit as he replied, "Because I care."

"Don't pamper me..."

"I'm not."

"No, you certainly—"

"I'm not. I'm not taking away your freedom, right? Treat it as bonus from the effin sky, you brat."

It was enough to make those emerald orbs water again, but the brunet held it in this time. Before his mind could process what he was doing, his body was already moving on its own accord and his arms were wrapping around Levi's shoulder.

"Ere—"

"J-Just a sec."

There was that warmth again, filling his chest with bliss and opening his mind to possibilities that could potentially change his life. His dream resurfaced in his mind—his mom's kind eyes brightened in happiness. He never felt that kind of warmth with anyone else in a long time, besides from his second family and his childhood friends.

_So how come Levi could give me this much comfort?_

Somehow, the idea of having Levi walk around in his apartment almost everyday with that silly apron didn't seem too bad.

And Eren said, "I think I just found my inspiration."

Levi couldn't help but let his fingers tug on the younger's shirt, slowly returning the warm embrace.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Almost didn't make it :O Work and school is a bad combination D: I hope you'd like this chapter though :) Thank you for the kudos~


	5. A Month's Worth of Tales

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A month since Eren first met Levi. A date at an art gallery show ;)

**I don't own SnK**

* * *

 

_"It's a funny thing about looking for things. If you hunt for a needle in a haystack you don't find it. If you don't give a darn whether you ever see the needle or not it runs into you the first time you lean against the stack._

_" -P.G. Wodehouse_

* * *

 

**~Chapter Five: A Month's Worth of Tales~**

 

"You have a lunchbox—a home cooked meal."

Armin's cerulean eyes were fixed on the tasty-looking beef with leafy vegetables on top of the white rice. Thank God Levi didn't decide to put Eren's food in an embarrassing plastic container, like he did a week ago when he handed him a hello-freaking-kitty lunchbox. The green-eyed student was almost afraid to open his alarming food package at the cafeteria.

"Is it... that surprising?" he asked, gingerly taking the beef between his chopsticks.

"Yes. Because you _never_ cooked, let alone know _how to_ , Eren," his blond-haired friend bluntly stated. Oh, some trust he had in him.

They were at their usual hangout—the cafe across Mike's bakery—and Armin insisted to treat him to lunch but Eren obviously already had his share of food. Levi's home-cooked meal. The said man had fulfilled his promise and Eren could still remember the day he had gotten his first lunchbox from him.

And it was very important to note that the skies were dark and neither the crickets were awake that day.

"Here" was what Levi said as he shove a clothed-wrapped container to Eren, who just woke up as evident with the slight marks of his drool on his chin. The older man looked a bit repulsed at the sight of the younger one and he would have already left the apartment if the brunet hadn't stopped him.

"What time is it?" was what Eren asked dumbly, accepting the gift from the shorter man without really knowing what he was doing.

"6:30."

The teal-eyed man's eyes widened and his mouth gaped in shock as he exclaimed on top of his lungs, "WHAT?! WAIT. WHY ARE YOU HERE?"

Levi glared at Eren for causing such commotion and they were both glad that no neighbor had the energy to actually yell at them or reprimand Eren for being a noisy brat. The narrowed gaze on the taller guy made him want to cower in fear, then his mind finally awoke and everything clicked together.

The older man was most likely going to work, with his black dress pants, a black suit jacket over a deep crimson button-up shirt. Two buttons were popped open, revealing that smooth, pale skin, his defined collarbones and that delicious curve of his neck, thanks to his Adam's apple. Teal orbs traveled higher, from that freshly shaved lower part of his face to that perfect size of a nose and to those blue-tinged-gray eyes...staring at him with one eyebrow raised.

"Are you done undressing me with your eyes, brat?" Levi asked nonchalantly, though his silver eyes told a different story, a conspicuous amusement presented in them.

Blood rushing upwards, Eren's cheeks colored a good shade of tomato red, almost comparable to the lawyer's shirt, when he realized that he was indeed gawking. Trying to hide his embarrassment, he hid his red face behind the back of hand and averted his eyes from the shorter male.

He then remembered that he was carrying something, which he accepted while he was still half-asleep.

"What is this, Levi?" he asked, finally looking at the said person with curious eyes. Unbeknownst to him, those innocent eyes almost made Levi lose his ability to respond back, thinking of how he would love to kiss the younger's soft-looking skin around those caribbean eyes. The older male would punch himself first before he could admit that he was indeed having indecent thoughts about Eren.

"It's a lunchbox. I told you last night that I'll cook for you," he said under his breath, frustrated that this brat was making him say everything. However, the big smile that made its way to Eren's face completely washed away all his thoughts, warming his heart a bit.

"Th-Thank you!" the younger male stammered, hugging close the wrapped container.

That was a month ago, and Eren recently found out that Levi had been waking up at five in the bloody morning to cook for him. How did he find out? The green-eyed lad visited the lawyer at their law firm not too long ago and he got to chat with this brunette at the reception desk in the lobby when he looked for that certain man. The woman had this short-cropped hair and she had the nicest smile and personality among the strangers that Eren had ever met. At first, when she heard that he was trying to get a hold of Levi, her jaw dropped in shock.

"Eh?! Co-Corporal Levi? Why are you looking for him?" she asked, a bit frantic and the brunet could only guess that the visitors that the certain black-haired man had gotten in the past was close to zero. And _Corporal Levi_? Seriously? Could this man get any more terrifyingly perfect?

Eren told her bashfully, "N-No particular reason. I just thought that maybe I could visit him."

"Are you his friend?" she asked, eyes were a bit manic and Eren didn't want an interrogation from her. Though, her question kinda raised a point in Eren's mind.

_What are we, really?_

"I-I guess," he replied hesitantly, scratching the back of his head.

"He comes in at seven in the morning on the dot and his lunch break starts at about one—"

"Did you just say SEVEN in the morning?!" Eren sputtered, gasping in shock.

 _Doesn't that mean... that he's been waking up really_ yyy _early every other morning just to cook something for me?!_

"Uh. Yes. Why—"

"Brat?" And the younger man already knew whose voice it was before he turned 180 degrees and came face-to-face with his newly acquired-wife—

Wife _. Really, Eren? What the hell are you thinking?_

"What are you doing here?" Levi asked, one elegant eyebrow raised. He went up to the lady whom Eren was just talking to and told her, "Petra, I'll be taking my lunch break. Tell Gunther to send the files to me later."

"Yes, Corporal Levi!"

"I told you to stop calling me that," the older man hissed at the woman who just laughed like she wasn't affected at all. There was a twinge in Eren's heart that made him blink and shift his attention to looking at the glass windows around the firm. He was definitely _not_ thinking of how there seemed to be a comfortable atmosphere between the two. Oh, he was certainly _not_ jealous.

He felt his wrist being grabbed in a strong grip and he let Levi take him away out of the lobby. Eren then noticed that they were still inside the building, but the lawyer was dragging him somewhere on the second level. Once they were outside of the elevator, the teal-eyed student was guided towards a patio-like place and he could assume that this was the hang-out area for those who either wanted to socialize _or_ get back some precious sleep lost in the midst of their working papers. The latter one seemed to be the frequent crisis.

"So, why are you here?" Levi asked him again once they settled down on the comfortable love seat.

Instead of answering, Eren had the urge to tease the older male and a slow, playful smile broke out on his face. Levi's eye twitched. But the younger man knew that he was _really_ gonna go through this hell rising revenge. Revenge for what? For making him jealous? Nope. Not at all.

"I heard your work starts _at seven_ in the morning. Does that mean that you wake up at like five, like a sweet wife you are, and cook—"

Needless to say, a bruised shin was what he got and he didn't get his cup of coffee, which Levi asked his assistant, Petra Ral, to bring for them. Oh, well. Those pink-tinged cheeks were worth the trouble and the damage.

"Earth to Eren!" Armin shouted, startling some nearby customers and receiving some weird looks.

The brunet blinked once and twice, until he finally asked, "What did you say?"

His childhood friend gave a sigh of exasperation and regarded him with those dead-fish-like eyes, which Eren could almost interpret as "You-really-are-hopeless."

"So you're okay with Jean, now? Friends again, I mean," Armin asked, tone was evidently concerned and Eren smiled to shake away his worries.

"Yeah. I mean, aside from our usual attempt to flush the other's head in the toilet—I mean, my attempt to flush _his_ face in the toilet, I guess we're fine," he told him sincerely.

Armin made a snorting sound like an attempt to hide his laughter and Eren scrunched his eyebrows together.

"Well, I've heard that he's been visiting you in your class whenever he could. Are you sure you guys are _just_ friends? You didn't get back together without telling me or Mikasa, did you?" the blonde pressed on and Eren's mouth twitched into a frown.

"Yes. I'm sure pretty damn sure that it didn't happen, nor will it happen again, unless the horse-face got me bloody drunk and took advantage of me," he gritted out sarcastically, not liking where the topic was going. He was already remembering unwanted memories and it was hard to keep them at bay especially since Armin appeared to know something.

"I feel like this has something to do with your _wifey_."

"M-M-My _what_?!" Eren stuttered, cheeks reddening and he snapped his chopsticks together making a loud sound.

Oh, his friend was dead on.

The brunet recalled that _painful_ encounter from two weeks ago. He was in his painting class and Jean was indeed present in the room like a lost puppy, looking for its owner. Eren wasn't really in the mood to deal with him and he regretted apologizing for his rude actions towards that brown-eyed guy because the latter took that as a sign to continue pursuing Eren. Again.

_Like, seriously, who does that?_

That morning, the young man was clearly gonna ignore the poor attempts of Jean wooing him, getting a bit annoyed because every time he had painting class, he would see flowers or chocolates or sappy-ass love letters. At first, he accepted them in order to spare his suitor's feelings, but it got worse as the days passed on. Marco was giving him suggestive smiles and the others were clapping his back and were trying to tell him to just accept the other's feelings for him and go out with him.

Well, he doubted that they would still say that if they knew what that Jean did.

However, that day he was really gonna tell him off. Until they got interrupted. The thing was, in their class there were no rules if you had the incentive and the actually physical effort and motivation to do your work. So, when a certain vertically challenged, gray-eyed man sauntered into the room like he owned that blasted place, Eren was ready to explode.

A neatly packed lunchbox was dropped on his drafting desk and those teal eyes went wide in shock. _What the actual_ fuck _is he doing here?!_ His mouth opened and closed like an effin' fish, unable to formulate a some kind of an explanation to the sudden appearance of Levi oh-Lord Ackerman.

"You _clearly_ didn't see my text to you, didn't you? And close your goddamned mouth, you look stupid." Oh, how Eren _loved_ this no-filter Levi.

"W-W-Why are you here?!"

"To drop this off, brat," he simply answered like it was the most obvious thing in the world. Well, it probably was, at the moment. And the younger man completely forgot that Jean Oh-Shit Kirstein was next to him. That was, until the damn idiot freaking opened his mouth.

"You're that guy from the coffee shop," the ash brown-haired guy said, eyes were narrowing and scrutinizing the older man from head to toe.

"Ah, the horse-faced guy."

A clanking sound of a fallen paintbrush bounced onto the walls of the room. A sharp intake of breath followed.

_HOLY SHIT. HE'S BLUNT._

Jean's face darkened and his mouth opened in anger, then he raised his hand as if to grab Levi by his freshly cleaned (Oh, Eren knew this, alright) collar. That was when the person in-between snapped out of his trance and stepped out.

And apparently, there was no need for that because a screech from a certain redhead from outside tore the tense atmosphere.

"LEVI~! I TOLD YOU TO WAIT FOR ME!" Hanji came into the room screaming with the usual grin on her face. She spotted Eren and she dashed towards him to give him a bone-crushing hug, something he should and would've dodged if he wasn't preoccupied by _those_ two.

"EREN~!"

"H-H-Hanji! I-I'm choking!" He gasped out and the woman let him go, muttering a sorry. Levi had somehow kicked her out of the way, and by that, he meant out of Eren's space.

"Aren't you a bit too old to be Eren's friend?" Jean suddenly asked, not backing down. Nope, not one bit. He was totally disregarding all the distractions around him, which had probably took a great effort to do.

"Aren't you a bit of a shit-face to be his friend?" Levi countered with that impassive expression on his face, but his eyes glittered with something Eren would want to avoid.

"I'm not _just_ his friend. We have history. And I'm asking him out."

"Well, sorry to disappoint but we're practically married since I've been cooking lunches for him," the gray-eyed man bluntly said.

Eren had died there. With face and ears burning, he slumped on his seat, face slammed on the desk and covered with his arms, in defeat. He begrudgingly muttered, "Do whatever you want."

"HAH?! Wait! EREN! YOU TOLD ME YOU'RE JUST FRIENDS!" Jean exclaimed indignantly.

"'Friends' my ass," Levi snorted, eyes glaring at the other man.

"Shut up, old man!"

"Quit your yapping, you grass-eating-motherfucking-herbivore. Your immaturity is the reason why you got dumped."

"OOOOOHHHHHH! Shots fired," Hanji commented on the sidelines, resorting to patting Eren's head like she was saying, "Oh, I feel bad for you, having to deal with these two hard-headed idiots."

 _Rivals. Oh, Eren, you're so damn lucky._ It was already obvious as to what his other classmates were thinking, and the brunet could've sworn that someone did say it out loud.

That was the reason why Eren dreaded going to his painting class now, and he even considered dropping the damned class just to get away from Jean who was now as pestering as ever. He shot him down every single time since that accursed morning for he couldn't figure out anymore if Jean was really being serious about him or if it was his effort of trying to defend his pride after seeing Levi. Men and their egos.

However, in the midst of the craziness and turbulence around him, the young man confirmed something.

And Eren Jaeger could now honestly admit to himself that he was unequivocally captivated by Levi Ackerman. Without a doubt.

"So... this Levi, who is he?" Armin suddenly asked, pulling Eren's head out of his thoughts.

"H-HUH?!" he stammered, swallowing what was in his mouth down to his throat without knowing it, so he ended up choking. Armin handed him a bottle of water and the brunet quickly gulped down the liquid.

"Are you okay?"

"Y-Yeah," he replied, setting down the water bottle on the table. He closed the lid of his lunchbox, calming down and smoothing his shirt away. Somewhere on the back of his mind, he was happy to note he was able to finish his meal like he always did. Wasting food was also one on his dislike-list.

"Look, Eren," Armin paused to propped his arms on the table and his innocent blue eyes were placed on Eren's wandering ones before he continued, "I'm just concerned. I heard from some rumors that Levi is an older man, who is apparently "so hot he could melt my ice cubes". Hey, I'm just quoting what they said to me. Stop glaring!"

"Okay. Okay. I'll tell you everything, but promise me one thing," he said, eyes pleading and tone was serious now.

Armin nodded his head for him to go on and the green-eyed lad said, "Do not tell Mikasa about this. I will tell her later, but not now."

His friend's mouth opened, then closed like he was contemplating about what to say next. Armin was the most rational one among Eren's friends and the most intelligent one, so it was no wonder if he already figured everything out at that point.

His assumption was further confirmed when his childhood friend said, "It's your place to tell her so my lips are sealed. I also don't want to see her get hurt."

Eyes softening, Eren looked down. He would hate to receive the sad gaze that Mikasa would surely give him if she were to find out that the brunet could only love her as his sister. Or the now-established fact that he was indeed attracted to a certain lawyer.

He told Armin everything then, from the moment he broke up with Jean to the point where Levi started making him lunches. However, he did not dare say what feelings he had for the certain gray-eyed man out loud.

"I'm happy for you, Eren. I feel like he's that someone who can balance out the brattiness in you," Armin told him, tone was playful, and he was chuckling.

"Thank you very much, Armin. Why do I have a feeling you're not on my side? Huh?"

"Don't blame me. It's true that you really need some taking care of."

"I'm 22. I have a job. I'm not broke; not yet anyway. I have my own apartment. I'm perfectly fine living alone," Eren defended himself.

"So _ooo_ it's okay even if Levi stops cooking for you?" his blond-haired friend teased, and the other's mouth ran quickly before he stopped himself.

"Of course not."

"HAH! See?" The blue-eyed young man laughed.

"O-Okay! Maybe besides from the cooking part." The brunet rolled his eyes, but his lips tugged upwards in a lopsided grin. He then continued, "But you gotta congratulate me."

"For what?"

"Lower East Side Art Gallery. That's where my art—"

Eren didn't even finish his sentence because his best friend was already hugging the life out of him over the table. He smiled, nonetheless, and returned the hug with equal enthusiasm.

"I'm so happy for you! I feel like I'm more excited than you are!" Armin exclaimed, pulling back and beaming at his friend. Eren threw his head back a bit and laughed.

"Are you gonna visit the gallery? When did they put your work there?"

"Mhm. Three days ago. And yes, I'm planning to go to the gallery show tomorrow with..." The green-eyed lad blushed a bit, scratching his cheek in embarrassment.

"With Levi?" Armin smiled playfully, poking Eren's arm.

"Y-Yeah," he replied.

"Have fun! And you know, you gotta introduce him to me sometime. I gotta know if he's fit to be your lover."

The blush on Eren's face deepened and he stammered, "H-He's not my lover! Geez."

And thus, his mind got wrapped around that one question again. _What are we, really?_

 _"_ Not yet, anyway," Armin murmured softly.

 

* * *

 

The art gallery in the city had this simplicity that shouldn't be overlooked, because those white walls looked like they were part of a whole artistic work as they hugged the paintings hanging on them. Eren's caribbean eyes swept from one artwork to another and he wasn't regretting going there at all.

"This is like a maze. Where is your artwork?" Levi asked him, standing next to him as they both examined the art before them. It was oil on canvas; the green forest was presented in shades of verdant color and a giant eagle was placed in the middle, like the viewers were supposed look at the scene below from the creature's perspective.

It was fairly vague for normal onlookers, yet Eren knew what the artist's theme was. _Freedom._

"I think it's on the other side. Let's go," the brunet replied, nodding his head to his left side. He tore his gaze away from the artwork and spun on his heels to the other direction. Levi was right behind him and when they arrived at their destination, they saw a good amount of people admiring a painting on a large canvas displayed in the center of the hall.

Eren halted on his tracks and he heard Levi's breath hitched on his throat. Together, they stared at the object right in front of their eyes. The green-eyed young man could still remember the day he started his painting. And that was the day when Levi began filling in the void in his life.

It was an abstract depiction of various vibrant colors enveloped in black, and on the right side of the portrait was the side profile of Levi. His features were sharpened with strokes of the paintbrush, and his silver eyes seemed to glow in that darkness, determination and bravery were presented on them. A brown jacket hung on the raven-haired man's shoulders, and a green cape-like coat was fully presented to the viewers. A pair of wings, interweaved together, was displayed on the coat; one wing was painted midnight blue, and the other was a contrasting white.

It was—

"Amazing," Levi breathed out next to him. Eren sharply turned to the older man whose eyes seemed to spark and brighten every moment and then.

" _Jiyuu no Tsubasa_. Wings of Freedom. It is literally pulled out of this vivid dream I had more than once. I thought it fits you," the younger man said. He continued to gaze on Levi, watching his reactions changing fast, something that he thought he wouldn't be able to witness in his lifetime.

"I'm speechless," the gray-eyed man admitted, a small smirk tugged one side of his lips upward.

"I told you, I found my inspiration," the brunet smiled. The shorter man turned his head to meet Eren's eyes and that smirk grew a bit more playful.

"So how'd you paint this without a model?" he asked. That question made the teal-eyed man blush. As if he could admit that he already got Levi's features memorized in his mind, even with his eyes closed.

Thankfully, they were interrupted before the gray-eyed man could continue to poke fun on Eren. Dot Pixis was a bald-headed old man who happened to be Eren's art professor. He was also the head of the staff in the Art Department, and he was really fond of the student's artwork.

"Eren! Glad to see that you've made it. I knew that you're gonna make it big!" the old man said, clapping the Eren's back. The young man scratched his cheek modestly.

"Thank you for giving my artwork a chance, Mr. Pixis," the brunet said politely.

"Don't thank me. This is happening because you really do have talent," Pixis told him, smiling broadly. He must have had noticed Levi because his eyes turned on him and he asked, "Are you Mr. Jaeger's friend?"

"Yes," the other man simply replied.

"Isn't he a wonderful artist—Wait, are you—" the bald man trailed off and narrowed his eyes, scrutinizing Levi's face and switching his eyes from the man to Eren's painting.

"I see," Pixis merely said, smiling at Eren and Levi. "Well, then. Enjoy your visit here and Eren, you must watch out for buyers since I've been asked by one or two people if they could buy your artwork."

"I-I'm not planning on selling it, though," the green-eyed lad said.

"Yes, I know," the old man nodded, as if understanding his reason for turning the buyers down. "I'll be going now. I have to finish some work back in the university. Goodnight, gentlemen."

"Goodnight, Mr. Pixis," Eren bid goodbye. Levi nodded in acknowledgement and the couple was once again on their own.

"Are you ready to leave? Should we go get dinner?"

The brunet swiveled around and blinked at Levi before asking, "Where are we gonna eat? AND I refuse being treated to a meal. I have my own money, thank you very much."

"Geez. Just treat this as a congratulatory gift," the older man said, holding back the other thought, _And as a thank you gift for letting me become a part of your fucking fantastic art._

The younger man seemed to contemplate his options and circumstances at hand and he decided that maybe this one time he would make an exception. And thus, he agreed and they started to leave when a voice spoke, something that only Eren's ears had caught.

"Eren Jaeger. Another Jaeger proving to be an extraordinary man."

He turned around, intrigued and wanting to see if it was someone he knew. He did say about "another" Jaeger and Eren could surely count the few people who knew about him and his family. His teal eyes landed on a man, whose age could be in the 40s, wearing a black bowler hat. He was wearing what looked like an expensive suit and he had his hand in his pocket, eyes were fixed on the label of Eren's artwork.

"Oi, brat. Are you coming or not?" Levi called out, pulling Eren out of his curious stare. However, he didn't fail to commit in his memory that look that the man gave him before he left.

 _That_ look that flickered in victorious recognition, which was followed by a knowing smile, that seemed to say: _Found you._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the kudos :) There will be an update everyday until chapter 11 (there will be a new update in my FFn account tomorrow :D) and if some of you are wondering when do I usually update new chapters, I always post one on Thursdays :) I have work Friday nights so nope T.T


	6. Getting To Know You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eren and Levi getting to know each other's story. A date night with some comedy movie. And a bizarre surprise for Eren at his doorstep.

**I don't own SnK or the other movie names about to be mentioned**

* * *

 

_"Dreams are true while they last, and do we not live in dreams?" -Alfred, Lord Tennyson_

* * *

 

**~Chapter Six: Getting To Know You~**

 

The green-eyed lad had practically anchored himself on the ground as Levi proceeded to drag him inside of a five-star, fancy-ass restaurant. The shorter man interpreted that as his not liking the place and asked him if he wanted to go somewhere else. Eren didn't want to act spoiled so he admitted that he was afraid of seeing the bills after their meal. And thus, Levi took him inside the second time, with little resistance from the artist.

The raven-haired man managed to convince the Eren that he deserved to eat a lot that night so he ended up ordering this humongous dish of chicken carbonara pasta. He also didn't let him order anything alcoholic even though the man himself had ordered something fruity mixed with vodka. While eating, they talked about how Eren's classes were going and how Petra, along with the other SOS (Levi's Special Operation Squad) members, was dying to see him again. The brunet also mentioned about Armin and how his _dear_ friend wanted to see Levi.

"I see no problems in meeting your friends" was what he plainly told him.

"Did you get to talk with Mikasa and her family again...?" Eren trailed off. He wondered if the two Ackermans ever met up again after that awkward encounter last time he came over to their house.

"I don't visit them unless it's necessary," Levi told him.

"But it looks like Mr. Ackerman hadn't seen you in years. Wait, Hanji also mentioned that you just came back from Japan."

The black-haired man eyed him across the velvet-clothed table and he answered him, "It was a break from work. I travel quite a lot but I stayed in France the longest since it's my home."

Eren's Caribbean eyes widened in interest and he bombarded Levi with questions.

"Really?! So, you're French? Can you speak French? Where did you live in France? Are both of your parents French? Or are you mixed?"

"Slow the fuck down, kid. I'm not running away," Levi grunted but amusement danced in his silver orbs as he met Eren's curious eyes.

With pink dusted on his cheeks, the brunet muttered, "S-Sorry. I was just wondering."

"Well, fire up one question at a time, maybe?" the shorter man sighed and sipped his drink. The younger's eyes lit up again and something tugged in Levi's chest that made him want to turn away from the brat before he could embarrass himself. He thought of downing his alcohol down quickly in hopes that the blush on his cheeks would be mistaken as him being influenced by the drink. He thought better of it since he would be the one behind the steering wheel later.

As if he could afford to put their lives in danger when the time they had spent together was _barely_ enough.

And Eren was absolutely clueless to the fact that his interest in Levi's life had made the man a little happier than he allowed himself to be.

"Well," Levi cleared his throat and proceeded to speak again. "Yes, brat, I'm French and I am wholly capable of speaking my native language. My father was French and my mother was Asian. They died in a car accident and my uncle took me in."

"So-Sorry."

"It's been a long time so doesn't really affect me that much. And why the hell are you asking where did I live? Planning to stalk my old house, kid?" A smirk was plastered on the older male's face as he said this, making the "brat" across from him gasp.

"H-HAH?! What...No—I wasn't saying that!" Eren spluttered, his neck turning red.

"Uh-huh. Sure."

"HEY! Really! I—"

"I lived in Lyon. Well, I still do, technically. I make sure to visit every year."

The brunet's ears perked up at that and the previous embarrassment was now forgotten. His mind was generating more questions for Levi but there was no need to voice them out because the latter continued talking about himself, something that Eren had always wanted to hear since the day he met him.

"I left France after I became a full-time lawyer, which was five or six years ago. I got to meet Hanji and Erwin; though, you haven't met Erwin yet but you will. I visited other countries, studying cases and gaining more experience about the field that I'm in. Then, I got transferred here permanently last year and I was surprised to see those two idiots again."

The stars in Eren's eyes were the evidence of how much he loved hearing tales about Levi's life. It had been more than a month since that faithful day at the amusement park, and yet it felt like it was the first time Levi had opened up to Eren.

"Wow," he breathed out, "I wish I could travel like that. I've always wanted to do that since I was a kid; I feel like I'll get more inspiration to do my art and learn a lot of things and get to meet people, _interesting_ people. Japanese culture is beautiful, then there's that scenery in France that I've always wanted to see." There was this dazzling wonder in Eren's voice that made Levi lean in and listen closely to the younger, but the table between them proved to be _hella_ annoying.

"Did you ever visit Germany?" his companion asked him.

Eren nodded his head. "Actually, I used to live in Berlin with my parents but we decided to move here when I was five. We met Mikasa and her family because of my dad's job; he was a doctor. Then I went to school here and somehow forgot how to speak German. I know some phrases, though, because of my mom (he scratched his cheek shyly). Then, I met Armin and he became my best friends along with Mikasa. It was..." he suddenly faltered, turbulence of emotions passed through the glaze of his eyes in one swift moment. And Levi noticed it.

"...fun."

The gray-eyed man leaned back against his cushioned seat and he looked squarely at Eren, whose teal eyes were now wandering around. The young man thought that maybe he had somehow ruined the almost-perfect atmosphere between him and Levi, and he felt guilty for sounding like a pathetic person when this moment was supposed to be pleasantly romantic for the two of them.

_Ugh, did I really just think of "pleasantly romantic"?_

"Do you regret moving here?"

The brunet snapped his head towards Levi with widened eyes before he slowly replied, "No." The older man let out a small smile on his face and said something that threw away all of Eren's worries, making him smile appreciatively to the man in front of him.

"Good. Otherwise, we probably won't be having this dinner right now." The sentiment made the younger laugh—a genuine, carefree one—and it made Levi tugged his lips upward more in satisfaction.

"Do you wanna go home?"

There was a slight hesitation in Eren's eyes and the shorter male raised his eyebrow as if to gesture him to go on and say what he had in mind.

"I'd like to go somewhere else, if that's alright."

Levi huffed in mocked exasperation then turned to the young man across from him and said, "As if you'd have to ask, brat."

  

* * *

 

And thus, Eren was now swiping his gaze from one cake to another. Mike's bakery was open, as he predicted, and the green-eyed lad was more than happy to skip around the familiar place and greet its owner before leaning down to the glass case, the only barrier that was preventing Eren from grabbing the pastries.

"It's unusual for you to be here so late," Mike noted, putting down a ragged dishcloth on the counter. The young man knew that the shop was already closing (well, he worked there, so...) but he couldn't resist going at 9:30 in the evening just to grab his favorite cake.

His teal eyes moved from the remaining few cakes and finally looked at the blonde-haired man.

"Y-You don't have the strawberry shortcake anymore...?" His voice cracked, holding in the whine that was threatening to bubble on the surface.

_This would mean that I dragged Levi here for nothing then..._

"Actually," Mike started, and the brunet's head lifted forward. The kind owner smiled slightly and disappeared to the kitchen. A heartbeat later, Levi swung the door open and he instantly looked at Eren.

"I thought you're not gonna be long?" he asked, though his tone wasn't impatient at all.

"I thought they still have it, but—"

"Here."

Eren glanced to where the baker suddenly appeared with a white box in his hand, and it took a massive amount of effort for the brunet not to jump over the counter.

"C-C-Captain!" he exclaimed excitedly as his boss gave him his favorite cake.

"For some reason, I thought I should spare one tonight. And what do you know, you actually came here, Eren. Looks like my hypersensitive nose isn't for nothing." Mike meant to joke around but his tired and drawled out voice didn't really reach the hilarity level, so Eren merely chuckled at the effort.

"Thank you, Cap!" The grin on Eren's face was so big that the older men in the place had to laugh (well, Levi let out a "pfft" sound). It was during that moment that the other two acknowledged each other's presence and the green-eyed lad hastily began to acquaint the two with each other. Well, he _tried_ to, but Levi beat him to it.

"Mike Zacharius?"

The boss of the bakery grew rigid, almost unnoticeable but Eren caught it because he was near him. He never really knew what Mike's last name was and somehow the fact that Levi knew the man seemed a bit...foreboding. The lawyer stepped closer and the baker's face was suddenly expressionless, not that Mike was the expressive type but there was something troubling about it.

"Le-Levi? You know him? You two know each other?" Eren asked, eyebrows disappearing behind his chestnut fringes. The gray-eyed man was now next to Eren, a foot away from the counter, and he tugged the sleeve of the younger's light jacket.

"Have I met you before?" Mike asked, and his voice was full of utter confusion, though alert. His eyes examined Levi's and the two of them looked like they were sizing each other up, which made the air a bit suffocating because the tension was definitely building up in the close-spaced shop.

"What is an FBI agent doing in a place like this?" Levi asked, tone was hard and suspicious. His silver eyes glinted with something dangerous that made Eren grip the older man's hand.

Eren was beyond surprised; lips parted, eyes widening like saucers and head turned towards the man in question. Mike seemed to relax though, as if the question wasn't about him changing from that perilous worker to this harmless-looking owner of a bakery.

"So you've seen me before," he simply said.

"Yeah. Was it five years ago? I saw you with Erwin," Levi replied casually.

The smothering atmosphere gradually lifted off them and Eren could finally breathe again.

"I was in his team in an investigation that year. I apologize if I don't recall meeting you," the baker politely said.

"We didn't really meet each other. More like, I just saw you."

"Ah. That makes sense."

"So you're a baker now?" The shorter man raised an amused eyebrow.

"Yes, and it's quite more relaxing, taking a break from the everyday sleepless mess. Are you also a FBI agent like Mr. Smith?"

"No. I'm more of the type to corner a criminal in the court and defend the victim single-handedly."

"Ah. I see. A lawyer, then."

Eren listened to their conversation, shocked at the sudden revelation. He couldn't believe that his employer, who gave him a job when he first moved to his apartment two years ago, was actually this badass mystery-solver. Mike had been this older brother-like or father-like figure to him because he had been so kind to Eren, flexible with his work schedule and he let him do whatever he wanted in the bakery. Like that time when he decided to put some Christmas decoration last year and Mike just continued to bake in the kitchen. Then, there was that _one_ time (he never tried this again) when he attempted to use the oven and it ended up spewing flames. Mike never got mad at him but he was critically alarmed and concerned about Eren's safety.

The brunet was so immersed in his own thoughts that he jumped when Levi said, "Thanks. And good night."

Mike bid them goodbye, too, and Eren was pulled inside the silver Maserati. Once settled in and his seatbelt was securely in place, the brunet started to open the lid of the box where his delicious dessert awaited but Levi flicked his hand away. He glanced up and was about to demand what was that for, when his teal eyes clashed with that promising glare.

"Do _not_ eat here. No matter how much fucking _adorable_ you are, I won't let you get any cream in this car."

The threat was there, alright. But Eren's head kept repeating that phrase " _fucking adorable_ " and his blood rushed upwards, tainting his skin red up to the tips of his ears. He couldn't help the bubbling happiness inside him, cursing inwardly at the thought that a permanent blush would be on his face forever.

"Did you just say I'm _adorable_?" he asked teasingly despite the fact that he was embarrassed as hell. Those rose-tinged cheeks of Levi that came as result was definitely worth it.

"Shut up or I'll kick you out of this car."

Levi then changed gears and put his blinker on to get on the road, and all the while Eren's laughter bounced inside the car. It didn't take them a long time to reach their destination and upon seeing the exterior of his apartment, Eren frowned. He was enjoying his night so far and the thought of being separated by his now-favorite person was prickling his heart.

"Aren't you gonna go in?" the gray-eyed man asked indifferently.

The green-eyed man chewed his bottom lip.

"Stop that," Levi suddenly reprimanded him, tone was low and sharp. Eren let go of his lip.

"Stop what?" he asked, completely oblivious to the fact that he was the reason why Levi's thoughts started going wild in a matter of seconds.

"Nothing," the other replied, clicking his tongue and tearing his eyes away from the innocent brunet.

Eren took that opportunity to look at Levi and looking at his side profile made him remember of his artwork. The gray-eyed man really looked _so_ out of his league. Eren was just that clumsy young adult who was still in college and was honestly wondering how would he be able to support himself in the following years. The thought just made him feel bad about himself, wallowing in that self-pity that he created in a second. _Great going, Eren._

"Hey," he softly called out, successfully achieving the goal of making the older man look at him with those fierce gray eyes he had.

"Mhm?"

"T-Thank you. I mean, that's... for coming with me tonight and the dinner and for the bakery and—" he stopped after he realized that he was rambling, the tips of his ears reddening shyly.

Levi's lips tugged upwards, truly a sight to behold since it wasn't often that the lawyer would let anyone read his expressions—a gentle one at that—and Eren indeed stared at him in awe.

"I think it's a privilege for the model to see the artist's artwork."

They laughed softly, slowly easing the remaining tension in the car and soothing Eren off his lousy thoughts.

"I really wouldn't have done it without you," he declared sincerely, earning a smirk from the raven-haired.

"Because I'm fucking awesome."

"Sure, you are," Eren rolled his eyes.

"Are you okay, though?" Levi suddenly asked, startling the brunet a bit.

He knew that the man was observant, considering that his job was also about reading other people, and Eren felt like he could honestly confide to him. However, he didn't want to rely on anyone; he'd been relying on his best friends and on Mikasa's family since he became an orphan and now Levi would without a doubt lend his shoulder whenever Eren needed it. The thought was comforting, warming his heart and taking away all his worries, but the fact that Levi was more than ready to offer anything to him was scary, too. What if they suddenly got separated? What if this attraction that he felt for him was merely a small infatuation bound to dissipate in no time? But what if he got too attached to him? Wouldn't it be hard to let go?

A flick on his forehead woke the brunet out of his reverie and a pair of scrunched-up eyebrows came into his sight.

"Are you sure your brain cells are not imploding thinking like that?" Levi deadpanned. The teal-eyed student shook his head slightly to get rid of his past thoughts. No, he wasn't going to think. He would just need to act impulsively if that was what his heart was telling him to do.

And that was what he did. He hugged Levi.

Eren could smell _Levi's_ scent and he suddenly didn't care if the older male would punch him for being an affectionate and a spoiled brat. Right now, he needed a reassurance. He needed him.

"I ought to start charging you fees for hugs, you know," his companion told him, a teasing edge was in his tone. Nonetheless, the raven-haired man returned his embrace, patting Eren's head and stroking the nape of his neck, sending shivers down his spine. The brunet further buried his face on the crook of Levi's neck and the older man stiffened in place.

"You really need to get going. You have to get your ass up tomorrow morning," Levi warned; though his voice was almost seductively low, contradicting his threat.

"It's Sunday tomorrow. I can sleep whenever I want," Eren pointed out as a matter-of-fact.

Stillness in the car followed that statement and Levi slowly relaxed in Eren's arms. The younger man wanted nothing else but to feel the warmth of the body pressed against him, the faint smell of detergent (which was so Levi-like), and the smoothness of his skin as his nose brushed across Levi's collarbone. It made him shudder.

And Levi wanted nothing but for the time to stop.

Suddenly, Eren remembered the man from the gallery, jostling him away from the calm feeling that he was having. He pulled away from the embrace, finding that he had to forcibly pull every fiber in his body away because he seemed too attracted to Levi, apparently. There was that strange look on Levi's face when they put the existing distance between them, but he smoothed his expression back to his bland look.

Then, unexpected words echoed inside the interior of the car.

"Eren, can I kiss you?"

Eyes widening, the lad stammered, "W-W-What?!"

"Never mind."

"W-Wait!"

Eren grabbed Levi's wrist, successfully pulling the gray-eyed man towards him and shortening the distance between them, and when he became aware of this, he tried to pull back only to be jerked back and have something soft pressed upon his...

Left cheek.

"EH?!" He yelped and pulled back, the back of his head colliding with the car window. He muttered a pained 'ow' and attempted to rub the sore spot on his head. A soft chuckle snapped his attention back to the cunning shorter man, and he narrowed his eyes before pointing an accusing finger to the penetrator.

"Y-You-You kissed my cheek!"

That sexy smirk was back on Levi's face and he idly teased, "Why? Were you expecting _something else_?"

Eren's face flushed in indignation and embarrassment, and he literally could feel steam coming off his skin. _The_ question in his head was back, but he really didn't want to linger on that certain thought. Not when Levi was making fun of him. Again.

"Oi, your cake."

The brunet's eyes darted to the box he set down on the car floor and upon seeing that his feet were close together, one on either side of the object, to the point that they could squash his cake, he immediately parted his legs. An idea then came in his mind.

Green eyes met Levi's gray ones and Eren asked straightforwardly, "Do you want to go inside and eat the cake?"

Levi's eye twitched and the younger man thought that maybe he put on the wrong move, so he was about to apologize and say 'forget it' when the older male unbuckled his seatbelt.

"Let's go, then."

With pulse drumming against his ears, Eren enthusiastically followed.

  

* * *

 

The ivory leather couch was for more than two people so they had space between each other as it dipped with Eren's weight. Levi was sitting on the opposite end and his eyes were fixed on the black screen of the plasma TV, which Mikasa's parents bought for Eren because his apartment was "too empty". Two plates were on the table; smudges of cream were on the side of one plate while the other was almost wiped clean. He really gotta hand it to Levi for being a clean-freak because apparently, he also hated wasting food.

"D-Do you want to watch something?" the brunet asked nervously. He didn't know what was different this time; the lawyer had been in his house a couple of times before and it was to cook for him, so why did this situation feel a little more than nerve-wracking?

"What do you have?" Levi asked, as if he wasn't aware of the painful silence in the place aside from the constant hum of the refrigerator.

"Ehh... uhm..." he quickly went to the box of DVDs next to the TV stand and enumerated, " _Rush Hour, Fast & Furious, Conjuring, Legally Blonde_—"

He trailed off, realizing his mistake. _Ah, shit._

Levi's lips threatened to tug upwards to a smirk; an elegant eyebrow disappeared behind his black fringes.

" _Legally Blonde_ sounds good."

"This...isn't just to tease me, right?"

"Depends. Did you buy that thinking of me as a lawyer, though, I'm not blond, or..."

"LEVI!"

The lawyer couldn't help but let his laughter escape from his lips. He didn't intend to break his composure, but the reaction that Eren gave him was more than he could ask for.

Eren was astonished. The lovely sound of Levi resonated inside his head like a broken radio. It wasn't everyday that he could see Levi expressing something else aside from his get-the-fuck-out-and-don't-talk-to-me look. Then, it hit Eren.

He really didn't know anything about Levi and he judged him as an intimidating man the first time they met. _Does he act like this around Hanji and his friend, Erwin? Does he only laugh and smile a lot around me? Does he have a lot of friends? Am I... special?_ It was that moment when Eren suddenly made it his goal to make the older man laugh and smile whenever he was there. Maybe, he really could become special to him that way.

_If could hear that laugh everyday, then I don't think I mind embarrassing myself for him._

A DVD slid off from his grasp and it clattered on the ground.

"I changed my mind. Let's watch that," Levi announced as his eyes landed on the rectangular plastic. Eren let out a laugh and he leaned on the balls of his feet as he put _White Chicks_ in his DVD player.

Hence, the entertaining night commenced. And Eren missed the count after Levi laughed the fifth time.

 

* * *

 

Eren's consciousness came back to him as his nose got a whiff of something... delicious. He cautiously opened one eye and saw that he was still in his living room, then he finally decided to straighten up. With his mind slowly clearing, he realized that there was indeed a mouth-watering aroma inside his apartment.

From his kitchen.

He let the blanket draped over him drop on his lap and he turned around, which was a bad idea because he audibly cracked some joints. He grasped that there was a numbing ache on his back and his neck, probably because he slept on his couch, a place where he wouldn't think of sleeping if he wanted a good night sleep. He stood up and he let last night's events swarm his brain. He was in the middle of processing everything when a voice spoke.

"Brat, you awake?"

Nonetheless, he almost got a whiplash as to how fast he turned his head towards the owner of that deep voice. He balled up the blanket he used and put it on the sofa before he quickly went to his kitchen.

He practically drooled at the sight. Omelet, sausages and fried rice were presented on the table and the brewed coffee was waiting to be poured into those two mugs. When was the last time he had a _real_ breakfast? Eren was glad that he picked up his grocery shopping from that time Levi lectured him about eating properly, otherwise there wouldn't be anything to cook at all. Which would probably piss off a certain short lawyer.

"I figured I should cook something for us. But I'm not letting you have a bite unless you wash up and get rid of that stinking morning breath."

The brunet looked up and was about to give Levi a bearhug but thought better of it. Giving the older man a surprise attack early in the morning would probably give him some bruised shin or worse... However, he didn't argue that he really needed to go to the bathroom first, but a question popped in his mind.

"Don't you have work?"

"It's Sunday," the gray-eyed man answered as if his reply would suffice. And it did.

"What time is it?" Eren asked, yawning at the end of his question. He stretched his arms, his long-sleeve shirt riding up, and he failed to notice those gray eyes flicking towards the exposed skin above the waistband of his cotton pants.

"E-Eight in the morning."

Eren blinked and looked sharply at Levi's face, which was now turned away from him.

_Did he just stutter?_

His eyes fell on that pink, bunny apron.

"That looks good on you," he commented playfully, a big smile on his face. Levi lightly kicked him in the shin and shoved him aside as he took off the apron. He really should've just risked the bear hug...

"It really is a wonder why you have that apron," Levi muttered.

The teasing smile on Eren's face turned into a soft one and the shorter man expectantly looked at him.

"It's my mom's. She made that apron to cheer me up, I don't even remember from what. Sometimes I would wear it whenever she wanted to teach me how to cook."

The older male gave out a small smile, and he leaned closer to Eren to ruffle his brown hair. The younger closed his eyes and let himself incline into that light touch of Levi's hand. It was comforting and once again, he had that hope that his companion in this empty apartment would be Levi. However, he knew that it was impossible.

Their moment was broken with the annoying doorbell. The brunet's eyes snapped open in surprise and Levi let his hand drop on his side.

"Who could that be?" he murmured.

"Are you expecting someone?" Levi asked curiously.

Eren shook his head in response.

"Better check if it's something important, then."

He then hesitantly walked away from that warm atmosphere and turned begrudgingly towards the front door of his place. He didn't bother to see who it was through the peephole because he really needed to get back to Levi and his delectable breakfast. Fast.

Eren twisted the metal knob and pulled his door open, only to find...no one. A painful nerve twitched in his forehead for he was irritated that maybe his neighbor's child was messing with the doorbells early in the morning. He was about to slam the door close when he saw it.

The first thing he noticed was the oddly familiar handwriting on the white paper, taped on the top of a brown box.

_Eren Jaeger._

He picked up the item and stepped outside his apartment, looking around the hallway. He saw no one and curiosity got the better of him and he opened the box (it wasn't even taped close) as he made his way inside his place. It wasn't heavy and was in fact, weirdly light. He stuck his hand in and searched for whatever was inside the box. He touched a cold, thin object.

"Who is it?" Levi asked as he approached Eren who stopped in the middle of his living room.

"I don't know," he answered honestly, eyebrows meeting together together in confusion. He lifted the object that he felt in the box and the light from his windows hit it, making it shine.

"A key?" his companion muttered questioningly.

The younger man didn't answer right away, a lump in his throat prevented him from speaking, but he elicited a sharp intake of breath. He felt his stomach drop and his heart stopped at the moment recognition flashed before his eyes. Slightly trembling, he held the gold, ancient-looking key on his palm.

"It's...It's my dad's key."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let's face it: we all want to see a gentle Levi in real life hahaha I can't believe I'm typing new chapters away and I don't even have a date to senior prom yet XD Terrific. 
> 
> New chapter in my FFn account today~!


	7. Loving A Rose with Its Thorns

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mike shows up at Eren's apartment. Eren spends some time with Levi at his workplace. Levi gets to know Eren's turmoil a bit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm wondering who read the new chapter on FFn yesterday? Did you? :D

**I don't own SnK**

* * *

 

_"Learn to love with all your heart and accept the unlovable side of others. For anyone can love a rose, but it takes a great heart to include the thorns."  
-Anonymous._

* * *

 

**~Chapter Seven: Loving A Rose with Its Thorns~**

          

The fact that Levi was late made Eren worry.

The brunet was awake at six in the morning sharp, expecting that he would hear his doorbell at the exact time. Levi liked to be punctual and since he was making Eren's lunches, the younger man thought that setting his alarm clock to full blast at six in the morning would somehow show even half of his appreciation to the lawyer's home-cooked meal. And it was a feat, really, because Eren never woke up early for someone else's sake.

So hearing silence at the start of the sunrise was unusual. It prompted him to climb out of his bed and walk to the foyer, just to pace around anxiously. His couch caught his eyes, remembering the time he spent with Levi watching comedy movies and falling asleep together as if they had been doing those since forever.

It made him giddy thinking about it, but it didn't erase the cloud of worry enveloping his heart.

His train of thoughts led to his recalling of his father's key, which somehow manifested right in front of his apartment two weeks ago. Eren and Levi tensely joked around that maybe it was his dad's ghost visiting him, though, the former knew better than a slight trick of imagination could do this phenomenon. The object now hung around his neck with a silver chain that he found randomly lying in his drawer, cold and stinging as if a constant reminder of the dread he felt upon receiving the key.

It was like a message.

_Ding Dong!_

The sound tore him from his reverie and the green-eyed lad jumped, halting in his step, before he fled through the hallway and pulling the door with so much unnecessary force that the knob could've had been severed from it.

"Levi!" he called out, expecting to meet those familiar fierce silver eyes, but he faced Mike.

Mike who was supposed to be his boss and who was supposed to be opening the shop in a matter of an hour. Mike who was supposedly a FBI agent but was selling cakes and bread instead. Mike who stood up as his friend or brother or father in any given circumstance that Eren was grateful for.

However, he wasn't feeling grateful at the moment. The hole in his chest was enlarging, threatening to cut off the air in his lungs.

"Sorry. I'm probably the person you least expected to come," the baker said sheepishly, an apologetic smile on his face and it only made the brunet feel bad. But he was right that he was definitely not expecting his presence in his apartment.

"Is something wrong?" Eren asked, finally noticing that Mike was sweating furiously as if he had been running ten miles to get to the younger man's place.

"Eren," Mike said, his voice was turning dangerously serious and low enough to the point that Eren assumed that Mike was going to tell him something private. He was about to offer him to go inside when he noticed how his boss shifted around uncomfortably. The brunet audibly gasped, eyes falling on the arm that was in a cast behind that big jacket that swallowed Mike's frame, something that should be deemed impossible since the blonde had this huge built comparable to a former soldier.

"W-What happened?"

The older man's eyes locked on his teal eyes and hesitation surfaced before he finally spoke, "Eren, do you mind watching the shop for a week? I have...stuff to do. Ymir will be there to help you when it's not your shift. Hitch will assist with the baking, and you guys will only need to work for three or four days."

Mike completely dodged the question.

There was plea in his voice; a silent plea for his employee not to ask anything, like it was for his own good. Eren wondered if the "stuff" that Mike had to do was related to the whole FBI business, which was most likely the case by how Mike's guard was up. He was more alert than usual. The younger didn't want to question it, so he bit the inside of his cheek and allowed the older man to have a sigh of relief.

"It's no problem, Captain."

"Thank you, Eren. Thank you."

"I would like...to ask you about—" he trailed off, openly staring at the peeking blue cast around Mike's arm. The older man seemed to notice this and Eren was glad that he didn't attempt to cover it up because it meant that Mike didn't intend to hide it from him. Or did he?

"An accident," he simply said. It was an answer that barely satisfied the brunet's curiosity, but he knew better than to pry on other people's business, especially if it was bound to be troublesome and could potentially put his life on danger.

"Oi, brat."

That deep voice came from the right side of the hallway and Eren poked his head out immediately to make sure that he wasn't merely hearing things. And indeed, Levi was there, slightly panting even though his face told him nothing about his rush to get there.

"Ah. Eren's friend?" Mike acknowledged him. Levi walked closer to them, his gaze instantly finding the cast that was hidden in Mike's jacket.

"Rough work?" he simply asked, face was emotionless and the young lad knew that Levi was somehow calculating the situation under his means.

However, Mike's guard was unassailable. He scratched the back of his head and laughed nervously, "You could say that."

Eren could tell that Levi was gonna say something more but his boss was quick to act, deliberately cutting off the unspoken question before he could ask him about it.

"I really need to go now. Sorry for troubling you, Eren, and thank you."

"It really is no problem," the younger insisted, smiling to Mike. There was that nagging thought in his mind, that Mike could've had just texted him or called him on his phone, but the man himself had oddly turned up in his apartment instead.

His employer turned on his heels, eyes falling on Levi who was still a few feet away from Eren. Mike then shifted those panicked eyes to Eren, who was the only one who saw the change in him, and he whispered to him, "Please, be careful, Eren." And he was gone.

His stomach dropped and he felt that hollow gap in his chest, threatening to cave in any moment since that day. The key pressed upon his skin had spread the coldness in him, making him want to buckle and just hide away. It didn't take a genius to know that there was a storm coming their— _his_ —way. But seeing that worried expression on Levi willed him to show a smile and shake all his apprehension away for now.

_I'll deal with it when the time comes._

  

* * *

 

"How long have you known that guy?" Levi asked him once they got to his car.

The brunet buckled his seatbelt and leaned into the warmth of the leather seat behind him. The lawyer had ushered him out of his apartment after he made sure that he was wearing clean clothes, which he barely had time to pick so he went with the dark blue long-sleeve on top of the stack in his drawer, and some jeans. Levi reprimanded him about washing his face and getting rid of his morning breath first thing he wakes up, and Eren had rolled his eyes at how the shorter man seemed to act like a mom.

Or a wife.

And now they were suddenly on their way to Levi's law firm, another unexpected event that the younger man didn't foresee. _Gee, and I thought I would be watching anime. Can't really complain if I get to spend time with Levi._

"Two years," Eren answered. He then added after a heartbeat of silence, "Why?"

Levi didn't provide any explanation and the brunet thought if that was the end of the discussion, which he highly doubt because the gray-eyed man had this look of confusion on his face, eyebrows meeting on the center of his forehead and a frown upon his lips. Eren wanted to get the atmosphere a bit lighter, but he couldn't help but remember Mike's pleading request before he left the building.

_"Please, be careful, Eren."_

"He's not someone suspicious?" It was meant to be a statement, but Levi made it a question and the teal-eyed lad quickly replied.

"No, he's not. He's been taking care of me and if he wasn't there, I'd probably asking people from their cars for loose change or something." The feeling of appreciation was presented in his voice and the shorter man didn't miss it.

"Then, gotta thank him for that. But him showing up like that is really making me fucking uneasy," Levi gritted out, hands were tense on the wheel and a look of concentration was in his eyes.

Eren wanted to say that he shouldn't mind it, but he would be lying if he said that it wasn't making him agitated, too. It was like Mike knew something that they did not know about, like he could read it on Eren's face but the young man himself couldn't see it. It was unsettling.

He unknowingly gripped the key around his neck and his companion saw this. Levi leaned slowly towards Eren and he took the brunet's hand in his own, caressing it with soft touches, making ticklish circles on the skin.

"Sorry, I shouldn't have said anything. I woke up late for the first time in years and it's making me fucking restless. I should ask Petra for coffee," Levi said, though it seemed like he was convincing himself instead of Eren, and he also said the last sentence like an afterthought. The former, nonetheless, smiled at his effort and squeeze Levi's hand. He never would've expected that it would be this man who could bring him comfort and reassurance at times like this, instead of his two close friends. Spending time with him and getting to know him couldn't make the brunet any happier.

"Yeah."

Levi then sped away, and all the while, intertwining his fingers with Eren's to sooth him off his worries. And the younger was more than glad to shove the foreboding thoughts at the back of his mind.

 

* * *

 

"EREN~!"

Petra's shrill reached Eren's ears just as he stepped inside the lobby, and the petite young woman behind the reception desk jumped at the sight of the young man. Gunther and Erd were with her, bent over the desk and were talking to Petra before she called out to Eren. He started to go to them when Levi stopped him by grabbing his wrist. The shorter man was looking at his team who seemed to be gushing over something and it made him twitch.

"Please, don't indulge their stupidity any further and avoid answering questions you don't like to answer," he told him with lack of enthusiasm. The brunet knew that Levi had to have his coffee at that moment.

Petra, who seemed ready to greet and pacify the irritated lawyer, walked up to them with a sheepish smile on her beautiful face and a cup of coffee in her hand. She was wearing a blue shirt with ruffles tucked into her black pencil skirt. It was no wonder that Eren felt a little jealous when the said woman was comfortably joking around with Levi. Well, not that he had any right to be jealous when him and Levi actually didn't have anything _official_ going on, like maybe Levi asking him out? The thought merely made the young adult sigh.

"Good morning, Corporal. Good morning, Eren. I'm assuming that you have your sketchbook with you?" the brunette asked, and Eren smiled at her, lifting his hand that was preoccupied with the black, leather bound object.

"Have it with me," he replied. Petra handed the coffee to her boss who eagerly took and brought it upon his lips. The action made the brunet a little distracted because he was right in front of Levi, whose pale neck was now exposed to him as he took a careful gulp of his morning wakeup.

"You're showing them to us, right?" Petra interjected his thoughts that were obviously not innocent. The green-eyed lad swallowed hard and gave the woman a half smile. He could only wish that she didn't see him ogling at Levi.

"Sure."

She proceeded to drag him away by taking a hold of his forearm, and Eren yelped when Levi tugged him back by his collar.

"W-What the hell?!" He exclaimed, a bit caught off guard. The raven stared at him for a few seconds—three, tense and painful seconds—before he slowly loosened his hold on the younger's shirt. His long fingers found themselves peeling Petra's hand away from the brunet's arm, and the woman blinked a couple of times before her cheeks colored red. And she burst out laughing.

"O-Oh my god! You're so possessive, holy crap!" The assistant would've had found herself kicked if not for the fact that Levi could actually control his violent urges, which were entirely reserved for those who had the guts to make fun of him. Petra was already prancing away from them, though, before the lawyer could spew out some morning-stressed profanity to her.

Eren couldn't get himself to stop grinning, though. While he was wallowing in his own thoughts about his real relationship with Levi, the older man seemed to show him what he needed the most. His affections were obvious indications that he was very much interested in the brunet and the feelings were indisputably mutual. It made him wonder why did it seem like Levi was waiting for something though, because last week when he asked Eren if he could kiss him was a very bold move on his part. But he ended up just getting one on his cheek again. _Why is he holding back? Is he doubting his feelings for me? Or my feelings for him, for that matter? Are we gonna be forever flirting? What if he falls for another person? Ah, crap_ —

"Sorry, I can't be with you until my break. But we'll go out for lunch later, okay?" Levi said, breaking the young man's train of thoughts. This gray-eyed man seemed to have the best timing to intercept his thinking when it was going to the bad direction, and he silently hoped that Levi didn't have some kind of a mind-reading power. That would be hella embarrassing.

"It's okay. I'll wait for you, and besides I agreed to come with you today. It's not my first time here, Levi," Eren reminded him. Levi breathed out a sigh before unlatching his hand from his arm that was originally gripped by Petra a while ago.

"Okay. Have fun, I guess. Those idiots are good at entertaining people, so you can count on them. Probably." His voice held no irritation, but he sounded a little less lethargic so maybe the caffeine was starting to kick in.

Eren gave him a lopsided smile and crossed his arms before remarking, "Yeah, they'll probably be more entertaining than a bundle of joy like you."

It was Levi's turn to roll his eyes at him and it just made the younger chuckle. "Shut up."

"Well, do your best. Don't work too hard."

"Yeah, yeah. See you later, brat." He swiveled around and started walking to the elevators.

"Yup. See you later, Levi," Eren said, the words were lost in the sudden crowd of people flowing into the lobby. It seemed like Levi heard him though, despite being yards away from him, because he lifted a hand and gave Eren a gentle wave.

And the teal-eyed young man returned to his newfound friends with a smile plastered on his face.

  

* * *

 

"Wow, that's amazing! I never knew that you drew Levi!"

"Holy shit, Eren. That's Lower East Side Gallery?"

"That's amazing! Draw me next!"

There was enough flattering to drown Eren behind the reception desk. Gunter, Erd, and Petra had been flipping through the pages of his sketchbook for the past couple of hours. They had been interrupted more than three times by people asking for necessary information or just by a certain individual who looked suspiciously a certain lawyer-wannabe. His name was Oluo; dirty blond hair with undercut, _really_ small hazel eyes and failed attempt with course language. The older man was obviously interested in Petra and it made Eren wonder if he couldn't get any more noticeable about that matter, or the other one—which practically screamed that he idolized Levi way too much. The brunet had to shake away the jabs aimed by him, like calling him a "brat" and whatnot, because he felt bad. He felt bad because the poor man would never ever be able to impersonate Levi. Nope. Not even one percent.

And the laughter that followed suit after his departure from the lobby had been a proof of that. Oh, and Petra also knew that Oluo was trying to hit on her.

Gunter and Erd were called a few times upstairs and they came back, chatting away with the group. The young man couldn't help but feel funny because a college student like him was hanging out with a bunch of adults who seemed to know a lot more immature ways to poke fun of random people coming in than him. Telling them that he could make fun of Levi was obviously off the list, because it seemed like the idea was too absurd and too frightening for them to even think about.

Then, he showed them a picture on his phone. His painting of Levi, _Jiyuu no Tsubasa,_ to be exact. And they began their shower of compliments and open eye gawking at the image.

"I'm so jealous of your artistic talents! I can't draw for my life!" Petra whined, sounding childish and the student bashfully scratched the back of his head.

"I-I'm not really—" A glare from her snapped my mouth shut.

"I don't know why, but it seemed like those who have unbelievable skills like this are pretty adamant in denying their sacred talents. Like, please, shut up. Just draw," she deadpanned.

"The painting suits Corporal though," Erd said thoughtfully. They all agreed on that.

"I just saw this in a dream. It gave me the idea and I started working on it," Eren told them.

Petra looked at him with sparkles in her eyes. "Pretty amazing. I wish my dreams can bring me my hidden abilities, too!"

"I think being an assistant suits you better. Go yell at Oluo or something. Maybe you should say 'yes' to his proposal while you're on it," Gunther commented, snickering.

"Hey! Wh—"

"Are you guys done bickering like children or are you going to give Eren back to me?"

The sudden intrusion of the deep voice made them all turn to the front of the desk; they were bending down to the ground while Eren's sketchbook was resting on Petra's black swiveling chair. Now, it seemed like Levi was three feet taller than them and they didn't hide their clumsy smiles on their faces.

"It's not lunch yet, though?" Eren said, head tilting to the side in confusion. And Levi did NOT think how adorable the gesture was or the sudden urge to tear the young man away from those imbeciles. And he was certainly NOT jealous that the so-called members of his squad managed to spend time with Eren when he couldn't lift his ass off his office chair because of the amount of work left on his desk.

Levi sighed. He seemed to be doing that a lot lately, and he was sure that a certain person who owned those Caribbean blue-green eyes was the cause of it. He told him, "I want you to come with me. Maybe you can help me sort out some papers or something."

The brunet stood up and was followed by the three adults who had some impish grins on their faces. Before they could have the chance to open their mouth and blabber some unnecessary shit, Levi went around the desk and yanked Eren away from them.

"Let's go."

"O-Okay." The young man didn't forget his sketchbook, and if there was something that Levi was smug about, it was the fact that he was the first to see that precious book. Or maybe Armin, or Mikasa. But still.

He just pulled Eren away from there, but Petra just helped herself with a little remark.

"Go get him, tiger!"

The lawyer would've had chucked a stapler towards them if he had the chance to grab it.

  

* * *

 

"Okay... So what are we doing here? Or better yet, what am I doing here?" Eren asked, utterly at loss as he watched Levi went to the love seat that adorned his little office on the fourth floor. The older man had his legs crossed and his arm stretched on the sofa. His eyebrow was raised and the brunet took that as a sign that he should be sitting next to him than standing there looking like a lost child.

"I just wanna relax for a few minutes. Or maybe half an hour."

Levi was on the other end of the couch, and he managed to tackle the distance that the young man had put on between them by sitting on the other side, by unceremoniously swinging his legs around and falling back with his head softly hitting Eren's lap. The teal-eyed lad squeaked in surprise and he rigidly put his hands on either side of his thighs, not knowing where else to put them when the black-haired man was occupying his lap.

"W-What are you doing?" he stammered, full-out embarrassed at their current position. Levi was lying with his head on Eren's lap, for heaven's sake!

"Gonna take a nap. Wake me up." And that was it. He was out cold.

"I thought you woke up late... Did you actually manage to sleep at all?" the brunet mumbled under his breath, eyes settling on the man lying on him. He couldn't fight down the blush that threatened to attack his face but one look at those closed eyes and the serene face of Levi managed to calm him down. He was unmoving except from the becoming steady rise and fall of his chest. Eren took the moment to observe and memorize the older man's features further more. He already knew that Levi's face was smooth, unblemished and unscarred, and those lips were soft as evidence of the few times they were pressed upon the brunette's cheek or forehead. His jet-black hair looked so soft and he had the desire to touch them and play with them between his fingers.

He couldn't help himself. He did just that.

His touches were feathery light, not wanting to rouse the man who could turn grumpy in one wrong shake, and he could feel the heat from his body right on his thighs. The fact that Levi could sleep and show his invulnerable state to Eren was the only key he could ask for. Levi trusted him.

There used to be only two important people in his life before, Mikasa and Armin, after his mom died. After the accident, the Ackermans took him in like he was their own child and he couldn't be any more grateful to their family. He wholeheartedly trusted them. But he couldn't do it to others. Jean came close because he was one of his friends whom he knew he longest, and the fact that they dated should be taken in account, as well. Eren realized then that there were no real feelings between them, and that they were merely in love with the idea of falling in love. Or maybe Eren was just in love with the idea of building a trust between people. He obviously couldn't do it with Jean.

But he had that inkling that he could trust Levi.

Eren never felt that strong attraction for anyone before. Their first meeting wasn't the greatest but it was the most exhilarating touch of his life, and the start of the many beginnings. But if there were beginnings, there would be endings too, right? Putting your heart out there and offering it to someone was easier to be said than done. Especially when Eren Jaeger couldn't even begin to trust himself. He didn't want to hurt anyone, especially not Levi, but he wanted that connection with him. Badly.

The electrifying sparks between them weren't enough. Those innocent kisses weren't fiery enough. And those gazes weren't long enough.

Eren wanted Levi to only look at him, to tell him that he would be there for him, to kiss him goodnights and good mornings. He wanted to be there for him, too, when he's tired or has that childish impulse to see the brunette. He wanted to support Levi, help him with his job and visit him when he has shitty mornings like this one. He wanted him to smile more and turn those scowls upwards whenever he sees him. He wanted him to know how much he meant to him at that point. He wanted to fall in love with him more.

Yes, he was irrevocably falling in love with Levi. And he could no longer deny it. He wanted to be with him.

He wanted them to be together.

_"Please, be careful, Eren."_

Mike's warning suddenly startled him out of his thoughts, making him reel in pain. Levi was suddenly becoming a little doubly and Eren realized that his sight was just getting a bit woozy, like the feeling of suddenly getting up after you just woke up. He was unaware that his caresses on that raven hair had stopped, or the fact that his hands were slightly trembling. One of them found the key touching his chest, seemingly burning hot when he touched it. He grasped it anyway and the searing feeling stopped, and he realized that it was just his mind overreacting.

No, his mind was definitely reacting to something. And soon voices started filling his head, familiar and unforgivingly trying to remind him of something.

_"I love you, Eren. Always and forever."_

_"Mom."_

_"MOM!"_

There was that painful yet familiar ringing in his ears, rattling his insides and shaking away any coherent thoughts in his brain, and he instinctively grabbed both sides of his head with his hands. He bit his lower lip to keep him from screaming in pain, a throbbing agony was drumming against his ears and his temples. The loopy feeling that he got was worse on that second time around and he could feel his eyeballs rolling back. He gave in to the pain, no longer able to hold back that unmistakably groan of torment. He was shaking, and Levi snapped his eyes open, narrowing at first before widening in shock and alert, before he sat up.

"Eren?!" He gasped out, obviously surprised to be awoken that way. He slid closer to Eren until there was no distance left between them, and he proceeded to rub the brunet's back and gently turning his face towards the older man by grabbing his chin.

"Tell me what to do." Those were simple words yet the concern and panic were there.

"J-Just give me a sec."

The oppressive pain was over and Eren dropped his arms, like his energy was suddenly sucked out of him just by grasping on his ears. There was still throbbing but it soon turned dull, like a siren that just passed and yet its sound could still be heard. The ringing was becoming small and he wondered how did Levi's voice got through that ear-splitting shrill. His shoulders slumped and he noticed how hard he was breathing, like the oxygen had suddenly been denied from his lungs and now they were given access again. Levi was still not talking, but his eyebrows were furrowed and his gray eyes were focused on the young man. He decided to talk now since it was mostly gone—the pain that had yet again penetrate his whole being.

"Sorry. Didn't mean to wake you." Eren sounded exhausted and he grimaced. He knew that Levi caught on the tone and he spoke after what seemed like an eternity.

"Didn't mean to wake me? You looked like you were dying! I swear if that was some prank—"

"No," the teal-eyed lad interrupted. He hesitated but the worried look that Levi was shooting at him prompted him to say the truth. "It's...It's an episode."

"What..? Why? Anxiety attacks? How often? How do you feel right now? Please, tell me if you need to be taken to the hospital because I won't waste a goddamn second and I'll carry you out of this damn building."

Eren blinked. That was the first time that Levi fired some rapid questions and a statement in the mix. The agitation presented in his voice meant that he was genuinely concerned, and the brunet really couldn't blame him because witnessing someone have a some kind of an attack out of the blue would probably scare the shit out of him, too. Especially if he was someone he cared about.

"...Maybe I didn't get enough sleep or coffee?" he offered, but when Levi narrowed his eyes on him, he knew that he wouldn't let the topic go. Or maybe not.

"I'm not gonna force you to tell me anything. I...I was just...worried," he admitted. Those gray eyes were downcast and Eren felt a stab in his chest because he hated that expression on Levi—a disappointed and defeated look on him—and he hated that he was the one who put it there.

"I'm sorry. It's just that..." he paused and the young man knew that Levi would tell him not to force himself to say something but Eren knew that he had to. He wanted to. So he put it to test. He wanted to know if he could place his trust on Levi.

"That's the third time it happened. The first time was the night after I lost my mom."

Levi's eyes flickered with emotions and they passed each other one by one; anguish, sorrow, and regret. Eren's breath hitched on his throat. _No. He's gonna pity me. He's gonna tell me "I'm sorry." His response will be the same as the others._

Two arms pulled him gently forward and his arms awkwardly fell on those broad shoulders. His face was pressed upon a hard chest and the deep rumble told him that it was Levi's heartbeat, as if silently stomping and weeping in pain. Hands began stroking his chestnut brown hair and rubbing his head softly, like he was saying, "It's okay."

A few moments passed before the older spoke.

"I regret that I wasn't there for you. I wish I could have been there for you." Levi's voice trembled the slightest and it sprung tears in the younger's eyes.

And for the first time in five years, Eren really wanted to cry. He wanted to let it all out and open himself to someone. He wanted to trust Levi.

But the fear of losing him gnawed him from the inside, rendering him unable to admit that glaring fact in his heart.

That he truly cared for him.

That he loved him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Suspense, suspense, it's building up. Someone commented about what they think is happening in the story and I was shocked *hint*hint* If you're reading this now, I'm impressed that you came up with that speculation just from a few chapters hahaha If you guys want to catch up with all the 11 chapters I posted on FFn, you're welcome to read them. Or you can just wait here too XD  
> Thank you for the kudos and I hope you had fun reading~


	8. Launching Into Something Great

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eren meets Erwin. Ymir stirs something that will make Levi take that step forward. Eren and Levi finally establish something solid between them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you very much for the kudos :D And sorry if there's some mistakes. I type way too fast... *groans*

**I don't own SnK**

* * *

 

_"An arrow can only be shot by pulling it backward. When life is dragging you back with difficulties, it means it's going to launch you into something great. So just focus, and keep aiming."_

_-Anonymous_  

* * *

 

**~Chapter Eight: Launching Into Something Great~**

 

Eren vaguely heard the door of the office open because all sounds surrounding him seemed to be muffled. It wasn't after he heard Levi hissed under his breath that he finally lifted himself up, albeit reluctantly, from his position and turned his body around. He was greeted with a sight of a tall man whose blond hair was meticulously combed flat and seemed to possess an intimidating body built under that white button-up shirt. The stranger was wearing a gentle smile on his face, though.

"Hi, Levi. And Levi's friend...?" If he didn't know any better, he would've had thought that the man was confused about their sudden meeting. But Eren knew that he was asking if the way he addressed him as "Levi's friend" was okay. And he didn't know if he was really comfortable with that...

"Erwin, don't you know the term "knocking before coming in"? I'm pretty sure your manners are better than that." Levi's tone was clipped and the brunet felt a bit empty when the older pulled away from him, putting a safe distance from him. Well, it wasn't like he could blame him since they were still in his office; getting caught while in an intimate embrace wasn't the way to greet your coworkers.

"I didn't mean to disturb you. I was just gonna ask you about the case from yesterday," Erwin told him. There was amusement dancing in those blue eyes at first, but at the mention of the "case," they turned coldly serious. The green-eyed lad also noted that the blonde didn't come into the room; instead, he lingered on the doorframe. Eren suddenly felt conscious and thought that maybe he was getting in the way of some important matters, which probably couldn't be discussed in front of strangers like him. And the thought of him as a stranger to Levi sent a pang to his heart.

Unbeknownst to the brunet, Levi was eyeing him curiously; he already knew how to read the younger's expressions by then. He very much preferred that silly grin on his face anytime, any day instead of that forming scowl upon those kissable lips. He wanted to lift the brat's spirits a little so he turned to his friend.

"This is Eren. And Eren, this is Erwin," Levi acquainted both of each other; at least formally because they already had heard of each other from Levi. Eren looked at him, surprised, and panicked; he didn't know if he should stand up and shake hands with the older man at the door. Erwin saved him the trouble by finally inviting himself into the room. Was he just waiting for Levi to proceed with the introductions?

"Hello, Eren. I've heard so much about you," the blonde said as he proceeded to take the student's hand in his. His grasp was strong and firm compared to Eren's clumsy one, and it brought color in the younger's cheeks and had him stuttering.

"H-Hi," the brunet squeaked. They let go of their hands when a soft chuckle erupted from Levi. The teal-eyed lad sharply turned to the lawyer and the latter merely smirked at him.

"Come here," Levi beckoned him to occupy his seat next to him once again, and Eren could neither refuse the older nor want to stay awkward just standing there with Erwin. The thought of Levi wanting him to be close to him was a little endearing for the brunet, and he had to bite the inside of his cheeks in order to stop himself from grinning as he took his seat beside the black-haired man. Levi then spoke to Erwin, "Are you talking about the Reiss case?"

Erwin grew serious as his cerulean eyes grew a shade darker at the mention of the case. Eren noted that there was a beat or two after Levi said something, and he realized that Erwin was probably questioning his presence there. The lawyer seemed to catch on because he averted his eyes from Erwin and glanced at the younger.

"Looks like we're talking some serious business here. Would you wait for me outside...?" Levi asked hesitantly, concern flicking across his gray eyes despite his stoic facade. It was obvious that he didn't like the idea of Eren leaving his side, but the solemn tone of the FBI agent was something that Levi couldn't ignore. The matter that they were going to talk about was dangerous, and he'd rather put some distance between him and the younger if that would keep him from harm.

Those green eyes held understanding and the lawyer could only be grateful at how much his brat could become reasonably compliant to him at certain times like this. Eren gave a small smile and nodded before he rose from the love seat and nervously regarded Erwin as he made his way out of the little office. Before the brunet could close the door, he heard Levi said, "This better not be a waste of my time."

Once he was out of the lawyer's office, he scanned his surroundings and found the little lodge area to his right. There was a little hallway to his left where cubicles of workers were located, and by the shrills of the telephones ringing at least once every five minutes, the area seemed to be soundly hectic. He strolled towards the mini sofa in the area and he checked his phone for any missed calls or text messages. And there was one from Mikasa.

 _Mikasa_ : Good morning! Don't forget about the dinner later!

 _Huh? What dinner?_ And everything suddenly clicked in his mind, which was followed by a gasp on his part. _Oh, shit. I forgot._

 _Eren_ : Good morning to you, too! And yeah, I'll go. This isn't gonna be at the Wall Maria, is it?

The brunet really didn't like going to that bar or just the idea of getting intoxicated itself. The thought of the hangover that could potentially split his head open the next day or the fact that he could embarrass himself, something that would last forever in everyone's memories, wasn't exactly thrilling. He still could remember the one and only time he got drunk and he ended up ruining Armin's hairdo by throwing up his dinner _on_ him. The bruise on his eye that greeted the lousy him the next morning was not pretty, and he found out that his little blonde friend could mess up his face pretty badly if he wanted to.

He shuddered at the memory and read Mikasa's reply after a couple of minutes.

 _Mikasa_ : You really think I'll let you drink, dimwit?

He smiled and held back the laughter that bubbled up in his chest. No matter what happened, Mikasa really was the mother hen in the group and she was overly protective of Eren, regardless of her feelings for him. They treated each other like siblings and there wasn't a time when Eren hadn't wished that the two of them could really become true family.

 _Eren:_ Okay, I'll see you later.

 _Mikasa_ : K. See ya.

After that little conversation, he still hadn't heard the door open or close from Levi's office so he figured that their talk would be lengthy. The stupid game, flappy bird, caught his eye and before he knew it, he was aggressively jabbing his thumb on the screen as if the not-so-much-bird-looking-thing could actually fly higher or lower to avoid those Mario-looking green pipes. Well, then.

It must have been just a couple of minutes or maybe ten or twenty or half an hour, but the hot air that was blown in his ear startled him to death and he dropped his phone on the carpeted floor. He jumped from his seat and yelled out, "What the hell?!"

"Were you seriously playing that stupid game?" Levi asked nonchalantly but amusement sparked in those eyes of his and the brunet felt himself heat up. He bent down to grab his phone and clutched it protectively against his chest.

"Leave my games alone. You probably play it during your free time, too," he retorted back. Somewhere at the back of his mind, he cursed himself for being too focused in the game because he hadn't even heard the door from the office close or open, and he certainly didn't notice Levi's presence behind him until then. His gaze wandered back to that little hallway and didn't see the other man.

"Erwin left. He has some investigation to do," the lawyer said as if he could read the younger's thoughts. It made him self-conscious because he knew that Levi could read his expressions well and at that point, he could only wonder if the man had also heard his thoughts while they were wrapped in each other's arms a while ago. The memory made his blood rush to his cheeks, coloring it red, and he momentarily forgot that Levi was able to see right through him. Before the older man could open his mouth and embarrass Eren, the latter opened his mouth to speak.

"Aren't you gonna finish your paperwork first? Lunch is in a couple of hours, you know," he reminded him hastily.

The gray-eyed man just shook his head and the student knew that he could be laughing at him, but Levi just gestured to join him in his office again.

"You'll help me finish these paperwork then," he told Eren before handing him a stack of paper.

_Why does it feel like that today is gonna be a long day?_

  

* * *

 

"So you mean, you defended the man who almost killed the barista? Uh, why?"

It was almost one in the afternoon and Levi was already putting his pen down, ready to walk out of the office. Eren was following him like a little puppy, curiosity filled his voice as he voiced out his question.

"Because he should be defended," the lawyer merely told him.

They took the elevator and Levi pressed down the button for the ground floor, finally looking at the brunette next to him. He found it adorable (and he would never admit this out loud) how Eren's nose scrunched up and his brown eyebrows met together in confusion. He really seemed to be putting a lot of thought about this case that he read when he was helping Levi.

"He beat the shit out of the barista," Eren said, like it would make sense if repeated his words again, but it didn't and only Levi knew the answer to his question.

"Why would one have the drive to kill someone?" the gray-eyed man asked, his eyes were now directed to the little blinking lights that were indicating which floor they were up to and that they were steadily descending to their destination. The brunet was also looking at the same spot but his mind was running and was trying to come up with answers to that vague question of his companion.

"I don't know. Is it because he did something to him? Revenge, perhaps?"

"Yes. But why would he want revenge?" the lawyer pressed on, though his voice sounded a little too indifferent to be deemed appropriate with the discussion that they were having.

"Because he hurt him? Or..." Eren trailed off, and like a puzzle that fell back on its rightful place, everything clicked together. "He did it because the barista hurt someone he loved."

And as if on cue, the elevator let out a ' _ding_ ' and both men stepped out. Levi confirmed his answer, "Yes, but in my point of view, it wasn't a revenge."

"Why?"

"Because I think he did it to protect his girlfriend from that asshole."

It took a moment for him to realize the underlying meaning and green eyes widened in the revelation, biting his lip while his eyebrows further furrowed in concentration. Thoughts like, _How could someone do that? Why didn't they see that the man was trying to protect someone? Why?_ ran in his mind, and his scowl deepened as he realized that he was also like them; he also questioned the man's innocence.

"The others were pointing fingers at him, but I knew with one look that he wasn't the only guilty one. I had a hard time making him confess of his reasons because he didn't want the world to know about his lover," Levi explained further and his squad at the reception desk gave a playful salute, and Eren waved them goodbye, before they were out of the building and to that familiar silver car. "This world isn't just black and white. There are sides that need to be taken into consideration, because humans are not fucking innocent. We are capable of hurting other people no matter what our intentions are, whether you're sane or motivated by those deadly sins. That's why I knew that the man had a motive in doing what he did to that barista."

It was the first time that Eren heard Levi talk about justice or his work in general, and he wondered if those years spent studying cases that involved the human action and the human mind had somehow hardened the lawyer as a person—as a human. Somewhere in this world, someone was being accused unjustly, or being sentenced without hearing the truth. To choose to protect someone when their head was in the line was more than noble of them; it was remarkably courageous.

"I...," Eren started, eyes looking forward as Levi drove through the maze of streets. "I don't remember much about my mom's death. I just remember going to the hospital then to the funeral. For some reason, I don't even know what I was doing that night...that night when I lost her." He paused and looked at his fingers, "I just know that the person responsible for the car crash had ran and hid himself." He closed his mouth as his thoughts began to go to directions he didn't like.

They were silent for a while, until Levi spoke with bitterness under his tone, "And the man who did that is probably rotting in fear and guilt right now. The fact that he doesn't have the balls to tell the truth about his crime just tells us that he's also a monster in human form."

"Does...Does it get better?" he asked hesitantly, still not looking at the black-haired man. He didn't need to voice out what specifically he was talking about because Levi already answered.

"Truthfully, no. As a lawyer, I just need to deal with it as best as I can. And..."

"And...?"

"Situations come up when you're stuck between two decisions; whether you are to defend your client against your beliefs or you'll just follow what you think is right and not accept the case at all." Levi glanced up to him, hitting the breaks as the red light came on, and he continued, "And I wouldn't know what to do if I were to turn a loved one to the law."

The car ride was silent after that. Eren couldn't help but think about the last thing that Levi said. If he were in his position and he had to turn Levi or Mikasa or Armin to the police, would he be able to do it?

No, he wouldn't be able to. It probably wouldn't be long until the guilt of putting them through that, consumed him and his whole being. He wouldn't be able to live knowing that he destroyed someone else's happiness, especially if that someone he held dear to his heart. But... wouldn't it be wrong to ignore what was right?

_But how could it be wrong if the man who killed my mom hasn't been found yet?_

"Hey."

_How could it be wrong if there are many criminals out there who still haven't been caught?_

"Brat...!"

Levi shook him out of his thoughts, making him jump on his seat. Eren realized that he had been spacing out, gaze was now at the familiar bakery store of Mike. He wondered if this was where they were going to have lunch.

"Are you okay?" Levi asked him, concern colored his voice and the way he didn't bother to hide his emotions at that time told Eren that he somehow freaked out Levi.

He gave him a smile to reassure him and said, "Yeah. I was just thinking."

"I don't know if thinking is good for you or not..." It didn't feel like a joke, but the brunet laughed anyway. The lawyer seemed worried about him ever since his episode in the office earlier, and the young lad didn't want him to feel that way anymore.

"Let's go eat. I have work later so I'm not gonna come back to the firm with you. Oh, and I have class tomorrow morning," Eren reminded him sheepishly. Honestly, spending time with Levi was what he wanted the most. And speaking of spending time... he forgot about the dinner again.

_I’m just gonna tell him later._

They went out of the car and together, they stepped into the bakery. Eren inhaled the air filled with that familiar aroma of bread and sweets. This was the place where he spent his time at, building something for himself—a step towards his independence. It was where Mike took him in after seeing him wandering around the streets, looking for a job right after he moved in. It was where he learned that there were different kinds of people that he was bound to meet, people who ranged from a sweet little child to a very grumpy business man. Now that the bakery had no Mike in it, something felt out of place. It was very rare for the baker to take a break and now that he thought about it, he was always there in the bakery.

It reminded him of those ominous thoughts that were intertwined with Mike's warning before he left the apartment complex. It also made him recall of that blue cast around the baker's arm, indicating that he might have had been under a very dangerous job. It made the younger worry about him, and he couldn't erase the thought in his mind that he was missing something—something that was somehow connected to him.

His thoughts were interrupted by Ymir, his coworker, when she whistled a suggestive tune.

"Eren! I didn't know you have a new boyfriend!"

 _Uh-Oh._ _Well, shit._

"Uh," he started, wanting to collect his thoughts that somehow got scrambled after hearing _that_ word. His face was already beet red, and he really cursed the timing of Ymir's question. He had been thinking about the status of his relationship with Levi and he really didn't want another person jabbing it to him, reminding him of the painful fact that Levi and him weren't official. _If there's really a relationship to be considered..._

"Can I get a butter croissant?" Levi asked (it was more like an order, really) curtly. He looked perfectly indifferent for someone who sounded a bit annoyed, and Eren wondered if he was also affected by the greeting.

"Is that all you're getting?" the brunet asked. They really could've had gone somewhere else with real food (or fast-food...) but Levi drove here.

"No, I was thinking of dropping by Subway after this."

"This isn't the first time you've been here..."

"I like their croissant here. I once stopped by when I got coffee from that cafe across the street."

"Ohh."

Ymir went to work and without their knowledge, she had been observing the couple with scrutinizing eyes. Seeing Eren get flustered and embarrassed was damn amusing, so she decided to tease him.

"So he's not your boyfriend?" she asked, a playful grin was threatening to break out of her face.

There was no response and it merely encouraged her to press on, not the slightest frightened of the dangerous aura around the short man.

"So _oooo_ you and Jean are okay?"

There was an instant response: "Hah?! How is that related?!" It gave Ymir the satisfaction to smirk, because she wanted to prod and prod until that stubborn shortie finally snaps, instead of the twitch that she happened to catch from him.

"Because if you don't have a boyfriend, then that means that you guys are back together!" she stated as if it was the most obvious thing in the world, and it merely fueled the fire on Eren's face and this time, it was out of frustration and annoyance.

"No! That doesn't make sense!" Eren defensively squeaked, and by the way his eyes were nervously darting back and forth between his coworker and Levi, Ymir could guess that there was definitely something going on with the odd couple.

"Then, maybe you'll re-ignite that fire again tonight at the dinner? You and Jean will definitely gonna be there since it's a class reunion."

The sound of a water bottle being crumpled echoed between the silence and Eren reluctantly turned to look at Levi, who was currently burning a hole on the wall next to Ymir. The woman didn't even budge and merely smirked wider, and Eren could only guess that the courage she had came from that fact that she was _a lot_ taller than the lawyer. It was rare for Levi to be openly angry which was why the young man started to sweat anxiously when shorter man started glaring at Ymir. He really was glad that there weren't that many customers because they would surely be holding up the line by now.

"How much is the croissant?" the black-haired man asked, his low voice sent chills down the spine of the green-eyed lad. And before World War III could start, he stepped in between them ( _What the hell? Deja vu?)_ and attempted to appease the irritated man behind him.

"H-Hey. We're gonna go now, and I'll start my shift after lunch! Here!" He slammed a five-dollar bill on the counter and grabbed the wrapped croissant before he pulled Levi out of the door. It wasn't an easy escape, especially since Levi was damn adamant about paying with his own money, but the younger managed to put him in the car. It didn't erase the tense atmosphere that they somehow brought inside though, because there was still that line between the older's eyebrows and a scowl that was threatening to take permanent residence upon those nice, thin lips. Eren didn't want to further ruin Levi's mood but he knew that he had to speak sooner or later.

"A-Are you sulking?" If looks could kill, the brunet would be dead by now. Those silver eyes flashed but upon seeing the troubled face of the teal-eyed student, they softened, almost unwillingly. Levi shook his head as he stepped on the gas after the light turned green.

"I'm not."

"Yes, you are."

"I told you, I'm not."

"But you're annoyed!"

"No. I'm just thinking."

"Huh? Thinking about what?"

"You didn't tell me you're going to a dinner."

"Ohh."

 _That makes sense... Of course, he would be annoyed that I didn't tell him. But I was planning to tell him anyway, before Ymir beat me to it!_ Eren then remembered Ymir's remark: " _So he's not your boyfriend?_ " Levi was annoyed, sulking even. But if there was no relationship between them, then why should he be obligated to tell him things about his everyday life?

 _Because he cares. And because you care._ The brunet didn't want to admit that his subconscious was right—that it didn't matter what they really had. He decided just a while ago to trust Levi just like how he trusted him. Surely, it meant something special to them, right?

And while Eren was busy thinking, Levi had somehow reached the Subway, leaving the younger in the car with his own thoughts without telling him that he was leaving or if the brunet had to follow him.

Oh. Levi was definitely sulking.

It was amusing to some extent, because the sight of that stoic lawyer brooding over something trivial wasn't an everyday occurrence. Levi had rarely express his emotions candidly. And what were his thoughts about being special again? Yeah, the man definitely cared, alright. _He's probably worried. Or..._

_Is he jealous of Jean?_

The assumption was not unreasonable (far from it, actually) because Eren remembered the time when things were rough between Jean and Levi after the latter had shamelessly announced that he prepared Eren's lunches. Of course, it might have been also because of pride but there were no recent sightings of the two bickering whenever Levi decided to pay the student a visit in his campus. His ex had also toned it down over the past weeks and whether he was just being passive aggressive or had completely given up, Eren was appreciative of the little peace that he had now.

Levi came back after several minutes and he still wasn't looking directly to the green-eyed lad. The action seemed to hurt Eren more than he expected it to, and he thought that whether Levi was mad or not, he couldn't help but feel sorry. Yes, his reaction was entertainingly childish, but it was also reasonable. The younger didn't mean to forget to tell about the dinner, and the way he was being ignored right now told him that the shorter man must be disappointed, or perhaps a little betrayed by him.

And it hurt. So he decided to break the silence again before he chickened out.

"I-I'm sorry. I was gonna tell you but Ymir just beat me to it," he apologized, head downcast. It must have had been a couple of minutes before the car was filled with a voice again.

"Don't worry about it." Levi's response was tense and it only made the student turn his gaze everywhere but him.

This was the first (serious) argument they had. And Eren wanted to rewind the last twenty minutes of their time together and make things right. But he knew that what was done have already been done, and that thinking of running away would definitely _not_ make things right between them. He already decided to put his trust on Levi, and this was because the man was someone he could share his feelings honestly. If he feared his reaction, then that would be the same thing as not trusting him at all. If he really wanted to build something between the two of them, then he had to start right there.

Before he could even start talking, Levi had already pulled over to a curb and in front of his apartment complex. It made Eren disappointed and disheartened because the notion seemed to be the gray-eyed man's way of saying that their day was over and that they wouldn't talk about it anymore. However, it also angered him. Levi still hadn't heard his reasons, for crying out loud!

"Levi—"

"Eren, do you want to be in a relationship with me?"

He blinked. And blinked. And blinked.

The brunet's throat seemed to be a little constrained because his mouth opened and closed, like a fish, without any sound coming out. His green eyes were widened to the extent that Levi could see the different shades of bright blues and greens around the pupil of the student. His cheeks were pale at first, and then as the seconds ticked by, they exploded with tomato red. Levi couldn't count the times when he didn't see Eren blush, and while he was damn amused about the little reactions that the young man had showed around him, he was also worried that his little veins wouldn't be able to take it anymore.

"W-What?" Eren gasped out, finally speaking but ended up choking at the question. He couldn't comprehend how the situation had turned out like that, and his mind was running a thousand miles without him really understanding any of it.

Levi pinched the bridge of his nose in mocked impatience (maybe he really was, a bit) and looked at the artist square in the eye. There was something that was undoubtedly sincere in those gray eyes, and it prompted Eren to finally think properly.

"In other words..."

"In other words...?"

"Will you be my lover, Eren?"

 _Lover. Oh, god. He didn't just say that word._ Being the crybaby he was, the brunet let some tears leak out of his eyes. The sight of Eren tearing up, biting his bottom lip to keep more tears from coming down, was utterly cute... but the idea of making him cry drained the color from Levi's face.

"I'm not forcing you to do it, brat. Why are you crying?"

The taller man glanced up to him with those big, bright eyes and Levi wondered how could he not get any heart attack whenever he saw those goddamned beautiful eyes. And those thoughts that were running in his head was unknown to Eren, and he'd rather kept it that way.

"I'm sorry... I thought you were mad at me." The brunet was sniffling and the lawyer offered some tissues without truly looking at him because he couldn't take more of the sight. Eren, on the other hand, was still staring at Levi with pure adoration and disbelief. He still didn't understand how did things become that way, but he didn't want to take this opportunity for granted. So he would take it.

"That means that you'll be my boyfriend, you know," he said bashfully, keeping what Ymir mentioned earlier. He wouldn't need to worry about those kinds of things if what was happening right now was real. And he wouldn't constantly question himself about Levi anymore or feel insecure about their relationship.

"Whatever you call it, brat. And here I was expecting to ask you on the right time." Levi mumbled the last line in a super quiet voice, but with Eren restraining his ears to hear everything that the black-haired man was saying, he was able to catch it.

"You were planning on asking me out?" he asked dubiously.

Levi looked at him like he was the tiniest bug on the earth and it made the younger squirm under the gaze. "Are you seriously dense or were you dropped on the head when you were a baby?"

"Hey!"

"Because no one can be this dumb—"

"—Are you looking for a fight?!"

"—because I'm pretty damn sure that I made myself straight—"

"You're not."

"..."

"..."

"Shut the fuck up and let me finish. I told you that I care about you, and I'm more than willing to take care of you. But I know that you're not a child who needs pampering—"

"—Damn right, I'm not."

"Fucking let me finish or I'll kick your ass. And I just thought..." Gray eyes finally met those Caribbean green eyes, and they were interlaced with some worry and uncertainty.

"...thought...?" Eren tried to urge him on—tried to put some force behind his eyes—and Levi finally exhaled the words that he wanted to say.

"You're too precious that I didn't want you to get hurt, especially by me."

Eren's insecurities paled in comparison to that and he knew it. And he spoke, "So, the reason why you avoided that question was because you're afraid that you'll hurt me?"

The silence he got was enough for an answer and then he took that pale hand, idly resting on the steering wheel, in his slightly tanned ones. He raised it close to his chest, to his heart where it was beating drums once again, loud and enthralling against his ears.

"Can you hear that?" he asked, closing his eyes, and he knew that Levi was now watching him. "You said that people do what they do with certain motives. We're just the same. Keeping other people at an arm's length to protect them... But I'm probably different."

"...Why do you think that?"

"Because before I met you, I only thought about protecting myself. I wanted to protect myself from hurting—save myself from experiencing something painful again—so I put distance between me and the people I care about. But after meeting you..." Eren's green eyes opened, glistened with unshed tears. "I want to keep believing in people. I want to trust them and myself not to crumble after I let them into my bubble. I realized that don't want to be alone, Levi."

"Trust me, you're far from being alone."

It made Eren smile and he continued, "I built my own walls in order to keep the others out, and yet you were the first one to kick them all down in one go. I want to believe that I can trust you, that you won't betray me."

There was a small desperation for assurance in his eyes, and Levi caught it. He wrapped his other hand around their hands that were entangled together on Eren's chest, and he slowly leaned forward, pressing his forehead to their hands.

"I think I'll break before I could even break your trust." Those words took away the breath that the brunet was unconsciously holding back. Levi soothed him off his worries that instant, and it was still astonishing how could this man manage to affect Eren in such a way.

"And I'm the same. Levi..."

"Mhm?"

"I...I think I lo—"

Levi used his hand, slightly angled awkwardly towards Eren, to clamp his mouth shut. The younger's eyes were bewildered and he was about to ask why, when the older male told him, "That's enough for today. Let's pace ourselves and don't say anything that we will regret later on."

"I'm not gonna regret it!" Eren insisted, voice was muffled under Levi's hand. The lawyer rolled his eyes at the blatant naivety of the college student.

"Trust me, brat, there will be a certain time when you know that it's okay to say it. And as much as I hate to wait, I'm willing to wait on you forever."

A heartbeat of two had filled the stillness that followed, but the young man refilled it once he lowered Levi's hand from his mouth, gently grazing the smooth skin with his lips. "Then... will I also be able to hear those words from you?"

Levi flashed him a rare smile, not a smirk but a genuine smile.

"I'm sure as hell that you will. So wait patiently, brat. If we're meant to be, then we are. And oh, yeah..."

"What?"

"Tell horse-face I'll fry a finger or two if he touches you."

And Eren could only laugh at his _lover's_ possessiveness. Yeah, his lover.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Your comments really make me happy hahaha and surprise surprise. Levi finally made the move :D It's official (finally *phew*) Thank you everyone for following this story :)


	9. Tearing the Walls Down

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eren goes to his high school reunion party. He finally gets closure with the two important people in his life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Seeing kudos everyday makes me really happy XD I'm so glad I found this site hahaha

**I don't own SnK**  

* * *

 

_"I do not trust people who don't love themselves and yet tell me 'I love you.' There is an African saying, which is: Be careful when a naked person offers you a shirt.  
-Maya Angelou_

* * *

 

**~Chapter Nine: Tearing The Walls Down~**

 

Wall Maria was famous for a college hangout because of its non-too-explicit theme. Eren could see young adults in his age or older and some were actually from Trost University. The pop music that was blaring at the center of the dance floor was dulled because the brunet and his friends picked an area where they could actually talk instead of shouting across the room. He appreciated that, because he was sure that someone in his group would make him drink some alcohol, and he didn't want the music to add to his incoming headache.

"Here, Eren," his blonde friend called out and to Eren's horror, there was a bottle of beer in Armin's hand. And he was handing it to him. What the actual _fuck?_

"Armin, you know I don't drink," he said, emphasizing on the 'don't' part to get his message right. His brown eyebrows shot up when his friend just put the bottle on the table right in front of Eren.

"You need to loosen up." As if that one sentence was enough to convince him.

"No."

"Yes," Armin insisted, blue eyes were narrowing in an attempt to challenge Eren to oppose him. The brunet already knew that his friend could be pretty adamant about a lot of things but surely, Armin wasn't gonna let him drink when it was beyond his control if he got drunk.

"Are you sure you want me to drink after I puked on you?" He asked, eyebrows were still raised, and he hoped that his friend would just cut it out. After what happened between him and Levi, all he wanted to do was just lay on his bed and run the events of the day in his head a hundred more times. It was hard to believe that after a couple of months of being together and all that non-too-subtle flirtations, he was finally dating the lawyer, who was stuck in his mind 24/7. The way he smiled at him after he told him that he would say those _three words_ to him in time was truly a sight to behold.

"Eren!" Armin's voice snapped him out of his happy thoughts and he was greeted with many other stares at their table. Everyone he knew was there—Armin, Mikasa, Reiner, Marco, Annie, Ymir, and his other friends that he hadn't seen since high school—and they surely took the time to reserve an area for a long table to be arranged.

Oh, and Jean. He was sitting at the farthest chair from Eren, who was sitting between Mikasa and Annie. The green-eyed lad observed that his ex wasn't happy to be there and he could wonder why.

"Sorry, what was that?" he asked sheepishly. He really didn't mean to be lost in his thoughts, especially since his best friend was right next to him and she could easily read him, like Levi. It made him think if he was really like an open book, and he made a mental note to try harder at keeping his thoughts from surfacing on his face.

"You were smiling. And creepily, at that," Armin said, truly not holding back anything tonight.

"I'm not," the young man defended uselessly, because a faint blush crept up to his cheeks.

"Oh? Is it because of that shortie?" Ymir decided to interject at the wrong moment and before Armin or Eren could speak, Mikasa beat them to it.

"Shortie? Who?" she asked, tone was coldly suspicious, and she crossed her arms while waiting expectantly for the dark-skinned woman to answer.

"He was with—mmphh—" Her words were cut off when a hand clamped over her mouth, and she made retaliation by biting it. Jean yelped in pain, glancing up to Eren before turning away.

That was unexpected. He didn't think that Jean, his former boyfriend, would be the one to save his ass. Though, the man was still brooding next to Marco. The amount of dark vibes he was giving was enough for a stranger to think that he was depressed, but Eren knew better. He had known Jean since high school—seven years of being friends with him—and he knew that the ash brown mop was troubled about something. He didn't get to think about it any further when Reiner spoke to Berthold, a huge guy who towered Eren by almost a foot.

"Here! You and Eren have to drink." He handed the black-haired guy a glass of what seemed to be vodka. The brunet grimaced; he'd rather drink the beer that Armin gave him than swallow something stronger than his own tolerance. He made a face before taking two huge gulps of the awful drink, thinking how much it smelled like piss and _why would anyone fucking drink this?!_

At the corner of his eye, Mikasa had a stone cold facade on her face but her eyes were blazing with confusion and probably the need to have the answer to what Ymir had brought up. He knew that she would start asking questions, and he thought that if Levi had the courage to finally admit his fears and ask Eren to be his lover, then the least thing he could do was finally become honest to his best friend. To the woman who had been there for him since he was a child and who had given him support when he needed it the most.

"Hey," he softly called out and Mikasa averted her eyes off the spot next to Ymir's head to look at her friend. Eren didn't say anything at first, and he could see the light bouncing off the irises of his friend, thinking how beautiful her dark brown eyes were. It would surely hurt him to see those eyes reflect pain because of him, but to avoid any more damage, he had to let her know.

"Will you speak with me later on the way home?" His voice was almost a whisper, only for his friend to hear, and yet Armin had a knowing look in his baby blue eyes and he smiled encouragingly to Eren across from them.

"Yeah," Mikasa replied after a beat and as if she already had a conjecture in her mind what would they talk about, she displayed a smile on her beautiful face.

The night then went on and after a couple more beers, the group finally decided to go to the dance floor. Upon seeing the crowd of teenagers, the DJ started the crazy remix of songs that got everyone more pumped as a couple of college students nearby started breakdancing. Reiner pushed Jean playfully and the latter seemed to complain about it, but as the other guy beckoned him to dance, his eyebrows met together angrily and he threw his black jacket up in the air. Eren was reminded of the days that he watched Jean dance during their high school days, even teaching him some moves in order to participate to this event in their junior year. The days they spent sweating and laughing at each other had brought nostalgia to him, and now that he was watching him again do his thing, it was as if nothing had changed at all.

Because he stopped dancing right after the accident happened.

There was a lot of cheering and Reiner had joined Jean, spinning their bodies like they didn’t weigh more than ten pounds. The two other students were completely beat but they kept going for fun. The crowd was getting larger by the minute, creating a circle around the dancers, and the heat was almost suffocating if not for the entertainment provided for them. Eren couldn't help but grin because he had that sense of pride for his friends being the center of the attention, and the situation was a whole lot similar to that movie he watched with Levi. The thought of the gray-eyed man made him smile more.

Those intense light brown eyes met his teal ones out of the blue, and his smile froze on his face and slowly fell off because Jean continued to stare at him as he danced the night away. Maybe, he wasn't the only one reminiscing those old times; those moments he spent happily with his friends without the constant reminder that he had no home to come to—that he was already an orphan. In Jean's eyes, he saw himself foolishly creeping into the classroom with the hope that his teacher of his first class wouldn't notice him, but he ended up getting detention anyway. He also saw himself beaming happily at how Mikasa and Armin tutored him in his least favorite subjects. And he saw himself as that outgoing guy who could carelessly laugh and smile without a care in the world. It made him think, _How could an accident take away all of those things away from me?_

"Are you okay, Eren?" Annie, who was usually indifferent, asked him. She touched his shoulder with obvious concern and the brunet felt guilty that he made her worry like that. He met this girl in his second year of high school and she was mad good at fighting (though, she wasn't really a delinquent). She even gave him lessons and taught him how to defend himself, which he still appreciated up to that day.

He was about to say that it was nothing, but he remembered that he told Levi how he would start to try and trust others. So he replied, "Just reminiscing." It was a simple response, but it brought the tiniest smile upon his friend's lips and he knew then that she understood. They continued to watch the showdown until the crowd dispersed and danced by themselves again, leaving the four dancers clapping each other’s back to say "that was nice" and whatnot. Jean was still not openly friendly, but Eren saw him try to manage at least, a friendly nod to the other two before Reiner and him went back to their own group of friends.

"That was really cool!" Sasha, his high school friend who got caught eating in class in more than one occasion, exclaimed. She could've had some sparkles in her eyes if possible because she seemed to be entrapped by what just took place.

"You _really_ need to teach us those moves," Connie, Sasha's boyfriend who had this funny buzzcut, told Reiner.

"Eh, sure?" Reiner laughed, scratching the back of his blonde hair awkwardly. He might be a big guy but he really couldn't take compliments easily.

Jean, on the other hand, was about to go back to their table, and it might've been the alcohol but Eren's hand shot up and grabbed his forearm by surprise before he could step away from the group. There were curious stares from Reiner, Armin, and Mikasa but he ignored them. It seemed like it wasn't fair that everyone was having a good time while there was one who was conspicuously brooding.

"What's been up in your ass lately?" the brunet asked bluntly, blinking because it seemed like the same question was asked to him by the same person he was now directing it to. He guided them to a spot where no gossipy ears could hear them, and by that, he meant Ymir and Reiner. The brown-eyed man scrunched his eyebrows, seemingly frustrated, and Eren wondered what would it take for Jean to finally blow up and spew whatever was on his mind.

"Are you really not gonna talk?" he asked, urging his ex. And as if the timing couldn't get any worse, some lame-ass slow music came on, and the next thing he knew, everyone was already partnering up with one or two or three people. His green eyes caught the sight of Ymir coaxing Krista, a sweet blonde girl, to her arms and the girl blushed before she agreed to dance with her. There was Connie and Sasha, goofing around and practically running everyone over nearby. Armin was beet red as he tremblingly put his hand on Annie's waist, and the woman didn't even bat an eyelash as she pulled him closer by putting her arms around his neck. Poor Armin; he was almost steaming. Berthold and Reiner were trying to make Marco and Mikasa dance with them and they seemed unfazed by the woman's murderous aura that said, "Touch me or I'll chop off your fingers."

"Eren." Jean softly called out to him that he almost he didn't hear it, and he tore his eyes away from his friends before he looked at the man who had been his lover just few months ago. The defeated look in his face was enough to send a pang to Eren's heart, and he watched as his ex-lover lifted a hand towards him. He wanted to turn away because they weren't together anymore—because they had no reason to be this close to each other anymore.

And he belonged to someone else now.

The thought was enough to jostle him away from the touch and the flash of pain across Jean's face was unbearable, but the man smiled at him. It was a smile that was meant to match his defeated look, and Eren realized that no matter what his relationship with him was, he wouldn't be able to avoid the fact that he would still care about him.

"Are you happy with him?" he asked, and while everyone was dancing their hearts away, the two of them remained standing close to each other—close enough for them to touch, yet their hearts were thousand miles distant. The brunet knew what—or rather, whom—Jean was talking about, and the thought of that certain short-stack made him smile.

He looked at Jean and said with certainty in his voice, "Yes."

He received a genuine smile in return and his companion told him, "Then, I'm happy for you. I'm sorry for being such a pain in the ass."

Jean was the type of person to protect his pride first as his first instinct, as evident with the way he broke up with the brunet. So when Eren heard his apology, he had to stare at the guy for a good thirty seconds before slowly replying, "Don't tell me you've been avoiding me like a plague for weeks because you were thinking about how to say sorry."

He was serious when he said that, yet his ex-boyfriend laughed, almost hesitantly though. Jean then said, "Close, but no. I was thinking of how to let you go."

_How to let me go... Oh._

"Did you somehow hit your head when you were dancing?" No, Eren couldn't take it seriously. Just a while ago, he was seeing the Jean who loved to play around and do whatever he wanted. He was seeing the Jean who gave him his first kiss after he told him that he would take care of him—when he saw him pushing everyone away after his mom died. Jean was there for him when he needed him, and Mikasa had even accepted him begrudgingly at first, but she vouched for him until recently.

So how come this Jean was different from who seemed to be? How come everything seemed to be changing around him?

"No, I did not." The brown-haired man rolled his eyes, a playful smile dangling on his face. It was that very smile that he grew very fond with.

"You _do_ remember that you _did_ hit your head before, right?"

"Haha. Very funny, Jaeger. Do you really have to bring that up?" He said his last name. It was like in the past; the way he would get irritated by the green-eyed lad's nagging or by how he would make fun of him.

_So maybe, something really hasn't changed._

"You were clumsy," Eren stated as a matter-of-fact.

Jean twitched and retorted back, "Says the guy who would've fell on the stairs if I wasn't there."

"But Connie was fooling around! Wasn't my fault!"

"Yeah, yeah."

"Pfft. Connie got you that one time in the bathroom, though."

Jean gave out a long, dragged sigh before muttering, "I'll never forget that. I should get back at the son-of-a-bitch for experimenting with Mentos and soda in the toilet."

Eren let the bubble of laughter escape from his mouth, and soon enough, Jean joined him. He didn't care that the other people around them were staring at them weirdly, or if his friends were smiling gently at the sight of them. It was hard to contain the memories from resurfacing; all of them were from their high school days when they didn't have a buttload of worries to think about or complicated relationships to fix. The night made them feel carefree again, like they were teenagers who merely cared about pulling pranks to strangers or to each other, which was fun to do when you were with a group of crazy people.

"Jean." The brunet let his head fall on the taller one's shoulder, and the latter seemed startled at first before he finally relaxed.

"...Yeah?"

"Thank you." _For letting me go._

He didn't touch him, but that familiar warmth was enough for Eren to know that everything was okay—that even if some things had changed around them, their memories would hold them together as friends.

"If that shortie hurts you, tell me. I'll beat him up. Though, I'm the one to talk..."

He pulled back and playfully glared at Jean. "Damn right. Though, I'll take you up with that offer."

His friend laughed, shaking his head, before saying, "I only have one request."

"Yeah?"

"Can I have my goodbye kiss?"

It sounded an innocent request, something typical that a couple breaking up would do, but it made Eren hesitate. It was true that there was only anger and frustration that occurred during his break-up; heck, no one could possibly call that a break-up! No one got a closure or some sort, and there were only yelling and words of fury that they ended up regretting in the end. It was funny how that ending of their relationship had brought Eren to the love of his life now. If Jean didn't break up with him, he wouldn't have had thrown a tantrum or scream at the first stranger who bumped to him. He probably wouldn't have met Levi. And yet, it made him wonder _if we didn't break up, if I didn't meet Levi, would I be any happier?_

No. Something probably still wouldn't feel right. Because everything that happened to him in the past couple of months was just right—almost perfect even.

And he didn't want to lose Levi.

But the fact that Jean ended up the person who was still hanging on one last piece of a thread from their relationship was breaking his heart. No matter what happened, he was still important to him, even if they had hurt each other many times. Only that, this time, they would let go any of the romantic feelings that they had for each other. And with that in mind, he nodded to Jean.

It was only a peck on the lips, and yet, it was enough to flood him with memories that sprung tears in his eyes. The warmth that lingered made him remember of the first time that they kissed, and it was when no one had the courage to break down his door after his being absent for a few days in his last year of high school. It was only Jean, who actually went and did it, and he kissed him as a comfort, something that wasn't meant to happen but it did. His friend confessed to him right there and even promised to take care of him even if he didn't return his feelings. Eren was grateful and the presence of Jean in his empty home made him calm down, and it was maybe that moment that Mikasa and Armin started to accept the goofy guy.

Jean really loved him. And the thought of that made his tears flow on his cheeks.

"H-Hey. Stop crying," the brown-eyed guy said, contemplating whether to touch the chestnut brown hair in front of him before he finally muttered a "fuck it" and tugged the slightly shorter man towards him.

"Thank you." _For loving me._ His voice was muffled but Jean heard it, and in return, Eren heard the sniffles above him.

"You're such a crybaby. Don't you dare revert back to _that_ state again." The brunet knew what he was talking about, and when he remembered about that, he further buried his face on the shirt of his caring friend.

"I'll keep that in mind. Thank you." _For caring_.

"Stop with the 'thank you's’, it's more than enough." Jean's voice trembled the slightest and even if the green-eyed lad had the urge to look up and snap a picture, he knew that this quiet and calm side of his friend wouldn't last. He decided to tease him one last time that night anyway.

"Levi said that he'll fry your fingers if you touch me."

The grin that broke out on his face was accompanied with a groan from Jean as he felt him drop his head on his.

"Oh, god. That possessive shortie."

 

* * *

 

They called a taxi at eleven thirty.

Eren and Mikasa waited on the sidewalk outside of Wall Maria as they watched their friends leave; Sasha waved them a goodbye with a chicken wing in her hand, Connie went with his girlfriend, Marco, Berthold, and Jean cramped themselves in Reiner’s car, and Ymir took Krista home. Armin insisted that he would stay and wait for his best friends to get a taxi before he drove home, but Eren shooed him away with an appreciative smile on his face and told the blonde to go home because his grandpa was probably worrying about him. He didn't further argue and said goodbye to them, telling them to be careful. Eren nudged him to take Annie home too, and Armin stammered that he initially planned to do that. Needless to say, the blonde didn’t get away from them without putting on the brightest face that Eren had seen on him.

"Come home with me," Mikasa said after minutes of silence. The hum of the music from the bar was still loud, but quiet enough for two people to have a conversation, and there were the ever-decreasing sounds coming from the cars passing by. The street looked empty since most of the shops were already closed; yet the place behind them was still lively.

"Mikasa, I—"

"Just for tonight. I know that you don't feel comfortable, and you might actually had never been in the past, but mom and dad really treat you as part of our family." Her voice was filled with concern, and Eren looked at her.

"I know." He sighed, turning his head up to gaze at the few stars that glittered the midnight blue sky. "I'm sorry. Even after so many years, I've had a hard time opening up to everyone, and I don't think I'll ever be completely ready."

"Eren..."

He closed his eyes and inhaled, liking the feeling of the slightly cool breeze passing by his warm neck. It was almost summer, the opposite season in where _that_ accident took place.

"Mikasa, I still don't remember anything," he took a shaky breath and continued, "or at least something that could help me find clues about what happened. It's hard. It's hard to let anyone in when I can't even fill in the void inside me. It's like...like this hole in my memories is preventing me from moving on."

A hand pressed upon his own brought a little comfort, and he squeezed that hand that reassured him many times that everything was gonna be okay. She spoke, "And no one is forcing you to do anything that you don't want. If you want to trust anyone, then do it. If you don't want to remember anything, then don't. Eren, everything is in the past but if you're convinced that you need some closure, then I'm more than happy to help. Just tell me what to do."

There was a pause, and the next question suddenly had Mikasa's heart stop beating.

"Mikasa, why did I wake up in the hospital that night?"

She was about to pull her hand away, but Eren didn't let her and he grasped it more tightly. His green eyes were searching those brown ones, which were avoiding his gaze, for any some answers but there was only turmoil of unspoken emotions. He slowly let her hand go and he started staring up into space.

It wasn't the first time he questioned her about it. And it also wasn't the first time he didn't get any answers.

"Do you love me?" he asked out softly. It almost seemed like retaliation for her not answering his question, and it was the cruel way to ask that. However, this was what he had been meaning to ask. What he didn't mean to happen was for her to be the second person to have their heart broken by him.

"You know I do, Eren."

"I mean... Do you love me as a man?" He turned his gaze back on her whose eyes widened a fraction, lips were tightened in a straight line.

"What do you mean?"

His eyes softened. He knew that it wasn't the best time to ask about it, but he promised himself that he would be honest with his feelings and to the people that he cared about. If he were wrong about her true feelings about him, then he wouldn't do anything about it. But if she really did have them, then he'd have to tell her everything.

"Mikasa, I'm forever thankful that your family found me and took me in after my mom died. I'll never forget that you were the one who first reached out to me when I didn't know how to stand up after that fall. Which is why I love you and I will always love you." He closed his lips, watching for some reaction but she concealed her true emotions by having her eyes turned away from him.

"You're like a sister to me—a family," he continued carefully, observing the little shaking of her shoulders. "Remember that red scarf that I gave you? You always wear that, and it's really a wonder why you don't have it tonight."

Her cheeks were now red, a first indication that she was finally letting her emotions roam on her face. "Shut up. Annie said that I'll die of suffocation if I have it wrapped around my neck all the time."

Eren laughed and agreed. "Aren't you gonna get rid of it and buy a new one? I gave that to you when we were toddlers, you know."

She rolled her eyes at him and bit back, "No, you dolt. We were six, okay. It was a year after we met each other. And as if I’ll get rid of it; dream on."

"You still remember that?" he asked incredulously.

"Yeah. Of course I do."

"Seems like my memory isn't as good as I expected it to be," he said grimly. Their smiles fell and his childhood friend was about to say something that would make him feel better, but he knew that he didn't want that. He wanted to be honest to her, even if she couldn't do that for him as of now.

"I'm sorry. I've always thought that I didn't want to hurt you, and I made you look like a helpless princess in my thoughts so I didn't tell you. I didn't want to see you get hurt, especially because of me." He stopped and he smiled sadly because he finally realized what it was like to be in Levi's shoes, telling these words to the person that held such importance in his heart. "I forgot that you're not weak."

Mikasa swallowed, getting rid of the lump in her throat that restricted her from saying anything. She then said weakly, "Damn right, I'm not."

"Mikasa (she looked up to him), I found the person that I truly love."

Traitor tears spilled from her eyes and she turned her eyes to look ahead, at a distance where Eren was facing a while ago. "Is she someone who can be by your side? Is she someone who won't hurt you? Is she... Is she someone you can let into your walls?"

".. _.He'_ s someone who broke down my walls."

"Oh my god," she muttered before facing Eren again with an amused eyebrow raised. "Ymir said a 'shortie', and last time when _he_ came over to our house—"

"Yeah, I already knew him even before that. Remember the amusement park? My broken phone? He's the reason why I'm here right now and confessing everything. He taught me that being alone in that world that I created for myself isn't really the one that I've always wanted. He made me realize I've always wished for someone to break that lonely world so I can let myself outside. Mikasa," he gave her a smile, "I'm in love with him."

His friend gave him a heartwarming smile in return and teasingly countered back, "I can't believe that fucking shortie was steps ahead of me all along."

Eren chuckled and said, "And to think that you guys are related."

She glared at him playfully and snorted. "We're hardly related. Don't go comparing me to him after you just broke my heart."

He scratched the nape of his neck sheepishly and offered, "Whoops...?"

"'Whoops' my ass," she grunted. "Jean also let you go, huh?"

"Mhm..."

"Then... It's time to let go of my feelings for you, too. But Eren, you're always gonna be family to me, no matter what happens. And I might not be your number one anymore (really, damn that shortie...), but I'm just a phone call away. So if he tries anything, remind him that I'll fry his fingers off."

He blinked and laughed out loud, clutching his stomach and it might have been that infectious sound that got Mikasa also laughing. He was holding onto the concrete wall as he wheezed out, "He legit said the same thing about Jean just few hours ago. Please, don't deny that you guys are so _ooo_ alike!"

She stopped laughing, though there was still a grin plastered on her usual stoic face, and she slipped that high-heeled stiletto off her foot before she aimed it towards the brown-haired guy. He attempted to dodge it, laughing even more, but it ended up grazing his back.

"Serves you right!"

Anyone who saw them that night might have had waved them off as drunkards (they might have been under the influence but...) because two grown-ups wouldn't end up chasing each other around the block, like ten-year olds, screaming and laughing carelessly.

It was one warm night that he would never forget. And he would not regret tearing the rest of his walls down, and finally joining all his friends in the outside world.

Finally letting the one he loved pull him into _his_ world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mhmm. For those who wanted to see this closure, what do you think? :] I know that there's no Ereri but really, this chapter is needed.


	10. With the Stars As Our Witness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eren and Levi's first date as a couple. Nuff said.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First, I wanna say thank you for those comments because they DO entertain and make me happy hahaha. And I was really excited while typing this chapter (I couldn't take the whole fluff myself hahaha) Enjoy!

**I don’t own SnK**

* * *

 

_“When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You know that your name is safe in their mouth.”  
-Jess C. Scott_

* * *

 

**~Chapter Ten: With the Stars As Our Witness~**

           

“Hello?” Eren’s voice was groggy, an evident that he just woke up, and he didn’t even bother to open his eyes when he picked up his phone from his bedside table and answered his call.

“ _Oi, brat. You don’t have classes today, right?_ ” At the sound of Levi’s voice, green eyes snapped open and excitement ran in his nerves like an addictive substance. He instantly rolled onto his bare back, gaze was now focused on his ceiling and he tried to ignore the little spider webs at the corner of the room; he made a mental note to clean that up later before a certain angry short-stuff give him a lengthy lecture about cleanliness.

“I don’t,” he answered, voice was still rough.

“ _Good. I’ll be there in ten_ ,” Levi said from the other line. It made the brunet look at the glaring lights of his alarm clock and it said: 7:00 A.M.

“It’s Sunday. Why?” he asked, ignoring the initial snort that he got from the lawyer. There was a beat of silence and Eren thought that there was something with the connection or Levi had unceremoniously hanged up.

“ _Don’t you want to go somewhere today?_ ”

He blinked and slowly said, “A date. Are you asking me out on a date?” He didn’t mean to sound so incredulous—which he really was—but it was early in the morning and he wondered if Levi was really asking him out.

“ _Get up and get ready if you want to. I don’t want to drag your ass out of your apartment. Bye._ ” He dodged the question and he really did hang up on Eren, which made him try to grasp onto the other line in futility.

“Wait—What?! Levi!”

He stared frustratingly on the smartphone, as if it was the source of all of his bad luck and whatnot even though on contrary, it was what brought him to Levi. His eyes caught the time on the bar of the screen. 7:02 AM. The time was ticking, and knowing how impatient a certain short man could get, it was better for him to get out of the bed and take care of his morning routine. Once he was in the bathroom and was brushing his teeth, he paused for one moment to think about what was really happening.

_This is gonna be our first date as a real couple._

The thought, without surprise, had sent another shot of exhilarating energy through his body and he finished his quick shower, smiling all the while and thinking of what would happen today. The last time he saw Levi was Friday and it was only brief; the older male merely gave him his lunchbox because he knew that Eren had classes that day. They talked on the phone that day with the younger telling what happened during his high school reunion, and he left what took place between him and Jean. He figured that it would be better to tell his boyfriend that one tiny yet very important detail face-to-face. Considering that Levi and Jean had never got along since day one, the lawyer wouldn’t take it that well, and the thought of him actually frying his ex-lover’s fingers on the skillet was gruesome enough. No need taking it to reality.

He was looking for clothes to wear, throwing his closet doors open and staring at what was available. He didn’t own many nice shirts because most of them would get ruined anyways, with paint and all that. That was one of the downside of being an artist—no matter how much he was proud of his paint-smudged shirts (because it actually told people that he had done something artistic and worthwhile), he couldn’t maintain one neat shirt. That might have been an understatement, he thought as his eyes caught a gray plaid button-up shirt. He paired it with dark blue, ripped jeans and a black V-neck shirt. He was busy looking at the mirror and holding up his chosen outfit on him that he almost didn’t hear his doorbell ring. The short, hard raps against his door had managed to tear his gaze away from his reflection and he sprinted to his front door.

When he pulled open the wooden door, he was greeted with that scowl and indifferent expression on that familiar man’s face. The man who was supposedly his lover was about to push Eren out of the way and make his way into the apartment, when those gray eyes finally caught on to the brunet’s appearance. A sight that only consisted of a white towel wrapped around his waist and was hanging dangerously low, exposing the curves of his hip bones and forming a V-shape, and that flat yet firm-looking stomach where a few water droplets were shamelessly rolling onto. It certainly made Levi rooted on the ground and made his mouth snap shut. He didn’t know whether it was because his mind was lagging behind because of that sinfully-looking sight before him or if it was he tend to spew out some stupid shit when Eren was involved; the option of just staring at the young man seemed more alluring than moronically running his mouth off.

“You know you can come in, right?” Eren said, squirming because the raven was openly looking at him as if he was willing the artist to melt in a pile of goo. Levi, nonetheless, had taken his offer, stepping inside without tearing his eyes off the brunet.

“Uh, can you wait for me here? I’m just gonna get dressed,” the younger stammered. Levi definitely didn’t want Eren to go away, but he knew that he had to force himself to look at anything besides from that delectable piece of meat—or Eren. Holy crap. He was sure that he was gonna lose all his sense if he remained close to the green-eyed brat but then again, the attraction was too strong to fight against it and there was also that fact that they were now officially dating.

Eren went back to his room, not bothering to shut his bedroom door close because Levi had already seen everything.

Okay, maybe not _everything_.

He changed into his clothes behind his door though even if he knew that Levi was decent enough to let him have his own privacy at that moment. He put on his shirt and noticed mindlessly how the black V-neck fabric had exposed the outlines of his collarbones. He remembered that look that the short man had given him when he was at the door—it was one that said, “I wanna ravish you right here, right now.” The idea of making Levi speechless had swelled something in him; he felt proud that it was possible for him to get that kind of a reaction from that stoic person because he seemed to be the only one who could get flustered really easily, and while Levi’s reaction wasn’t like of Eren’s, it was amusing to see it anyway. And it was hot.

Oh, yeah. It certainly was.

He put the plaid button-up over his shirt, and a smirk made its way on his face as he thought of his lover’s reaction about his clothes. He felt a bit confident when he walked out of his room and motioned for Levi that it was time to leave, even though he wasn’t really the one who initiated this whole date thing.

“You really took your time, huh, brat?” he grunted.  The older male didn’t let Eren to be on the lead because he immediately stepped ahead of the younger as the latter locked up his apartment with his key.

They exited out of the building in no time and Levi guided them to his silver car. It was already 7:25 in the morning and Eren wondered what would they do that would require an early wakeup call. They settled into their seats and buckled up wordlessly before Levi started the engine. He made a mistake of swiping his gaze from the front to the younger man next to him. His gray eyes flicked accidentally to that exposed tanned skin, showing the curves of his collar. Eren bit his bottom lip to keep himself from smiling or laughing and he figured that it was no longer a laughing matter if Levi’s eyes had dilated for a fraction second.

The lawyer turned his eyes to the front again before he changed gears and muttered under his breath, “You’re in it, brat.”

 

* * *

 

They stopped by at a Deli store where Levi bought a tuna sandwich and bagels with cream cheese, which Eren grinned at because he was unusually hungry. He normally didn’t have the appetite to stuff himself in any way early in the morning, but there was something oddly pleasant about having someone share and eat food with you. He realized that it had been that way whenever he would have a meal with his friends or just Levi in particular; it might be because it was lonely eating alone in that empty apartment of his.

“So what’s on your date agenda today?” Eren asked, taking the last bite of his raisin bagel. He had been joking about the whole agenda thing, but when Levi really did pull out a piece of paper from his compartment with scrawls of writings, he almost choked when laughter bubbled up to his chest.

“What?” the black-haired man growled, a furrow between his eyebrows had appeared.

“Sorry, sorry,” he coughed out. He took a careful gulp of his coffee, which Levi bought for him even though the man himself had refused to have it because he didn’t trust any other coffee besides from his usual one. He felt the distinct burn in his throat and he didn’t feel constrained anymore.

“You know what, never mind,” Levi suddenly said, crumpling the sheet of paper in his fist. Eren’s eyes widened in panic, thinking that he had screwed up.

“I just didn’t expect you to really have a list!” he hastily exclaimed.

“Huh?” The older male looked confused for a moment before he took in the reaction from Eren and the sight of the now-crumpled paper in his hand. “Oh.”

The brunet attempted to retrieve the list from him, but he didn’t let him and Levi threw it in the plastic bag that he reserved for their trash. As if he would allow any dirt to splatter on his newly bought car floor mats.

The lawyer rolled his eyes and said, “I’m not gonna follow that stupid list that Hanji gave me. The damn woman wouldn’t shut up so I took it from her. I don’t want this day to be scheduled; it doesn’t feel natural.”

The younger male nodded in agreement and he flashed Levi a small appreciative smile. “Well then, surprise me.”

Levi took that challenge and showed Eren his signature smirk. “Will do, princess.”

  

* * *

 

They drove around for two hours, carelessly making crude jokes and exchanging smiles every once in a while, but Levi would always flash him his smirk whenever he said something that would make Eren beet red on the face. Like that one conversation that addressed what happened this morning.

“Are you possibly _physically_ attracted to me?” the brunet asked boldly, though there was no particular tone in his voice.

“Yes.” Levi didn’t even pause for a second after the question was asked; he told him his answer equally boldly as Eren.

“Which is why you’re ogling at me this morning,” the younger mumbled. There was that satisfied feeling in his chest again as if he accomplished something special, and he actually fought down the blush that was threatening to break out on his face. It was almost an impossible feat because he could practically feel Levi’s gaze on him again—strangely smoldering.

“I would’ve jumped on you actually,” the gray-eyed man shamelessly admitted.

“What—“

“Would’ve torn off that goddamned towel off your body—“

“—Eh?!”

“—and would’ve had thrown you on your bed to eat you—“

“STOP! Oh my god!” Eren screamed, putting his hands over his ears in an attempt to block those embarrassing words that were coming from Levi, which could potentially turned worse and become an R-Rated dirty talk. Not that he would’ve mind it; except that they were currently on the road and Levi seemed to have something—or more like somewhere—in mind to go to. Given in different circumstance, he would’ve had actually allowed this whole scene to be played out. Not that he had a fetish for dirty talk, of course not! It might have been the way those provocative words had rolled off the man’s tongue seductively, or it might have been Levi’s glances that told him that he was definitely watching him, his every reaction, his every squirm, or how that blush just traitorously crept on his cheeks.

Levi started to chuckle, something that he tried to keep to himself to no avail, and it was Eren’s turn to stare at him with an amused yet slightly abashed expression.

“Keep laughing, old man,” he said begrudgingly, though there was a playful hint in his voice.

Needless to say, the glare that was thrown to him told him that he now had something to tease Levi with.

  

* * *

 

When 10:30 AM rolled around, Eren’s eyes found the words AQUARIUM somewhere on the exterior of a glass building. He rolled the car window down just to make sure that he wasn’t seeing things, because last time he checked, Levi wasn’t the type of person to insert himself in a crowd of people who could threaten the cleanliness he maintained for himself with great effort.

“That’s an aquarium,” he stated dumbly, blinking as if the place was going to disappear in front of him.

“No shit.”

He looked at Levi and was about to ask more questions but decided against it and clamped his mouth shut. It was better not to say anything because knowing the older man, his patience was as short as his stature and that wasn’t saying a lot. So he hopped out of the car when Levi killed the engine, and he proceeded to skip to the entrance with Levi behind him, a lazy smirk was on his lips. The lawyer bought their tickets, silencing Eren when he protested about buying his own by saying, “I should spend money for both of us since it’s a date.” The brunet wanted to argue back but he didn’t how it would be worth it because Levi definitely wouldn’t budge and they would only waste time. They were inside and Eren excitedly explored the cavern of the ocean wall. For Levi, it was definitely amusing to witness a 22-year-old college student wander around with a goofy smile on his face, and he laughed when Eren stood next to a similarly overhyped child.

“This is probably the first time I’ve visited the aquarium since I was little,” the artist breathed out. There was spark in his eyes that Levi couldn’t help but search out in the midst of the ever-changing blues and greens in the younger’s irises. The water was reflected on them, making him unable to tell the difference between the ocean and Eren’s eyes. It was fascinating to look at, especially when there was a brightened gleam as a sea creature swam towards the glass wall.

“I’ve never been here.”

Soon, those teal eyes were gazing back on him.

“Not even once?” he asked, a hint of doubt and surprise was in his voice.

“Mhm.”

“Oh, wow. Aren’t you glad that I’m with you during your first experience then?” The brunet grinned jokingly, but the older male merely nodded with a small smile on his mouth. It was Eren’s turn to stare at the man then. Levi finally turned his eyes to the scene right before as the younger male began memorizing his features once again. Those gray eyes had equally captivated him just the same like the first time his sight landed on him. The blue tinge was interesting to look at and with the reflection of the water on them, those gray eyes were unusually blue. He mused how even if there was no emotion hinted on the face of the man, those eyes seemed to show the hidden feelings that he had. And right now, there was fascination that widened his pupils as a giant glob of jellyfish passed by. Eren definitely felt happy that it was him whom Levi was with, and the thought of another person on his place right now had twisted a wrench in his stomach. He didn’t like the feeling—it was almost nauseating and uncomfortable. He was jealous. And he could’ve laughed out loud because his own conjecture had made him feel that way, but at the same time, it made him realize how much Levi meant to him.

They were taken into a tour of the place, and Eren happily ran to the seats where a dolphin show took place. The sight of the green-eyed lad grinning from ear to ear had also made Levi tug his lips upwards. And the smiles of the couple had somehow remained on their lips throughout the entire show.

It was around 1:30 in the afternoon when Levi stopped by a pizzeria—Eren’s suggestion. The younger male ordered two slices of Chicken Marsala and Levi went with two regular ones and garlic knots. Once heated up, they grabbed their food and drinks and sat at the corner where there was a small table and two chairs presented. Levi, having some cleanliness OCD, pulled out a handful of napkins and began wiping his portion on the table. The brunet merely snickered and shook his head in amusement.

“Where are we going after this?” he asked, biting on his pizza.

“You told me to surprise you, brat. You’ll find out after we finish this greasy shit.”

“Wow. Do you happen to hate this glorious food, Attorney?”

Levi narrowed his eyes on him before shrugging. “Never said I hate it. It’s just fucking oily and I hate slimy shit.”

“That’s why it’s called ‘greasy shit’, Levi.”

The lawyer just rolled his eyes on him. Eren then began quizzing him on the songs that came on in the place, and Levi got the names of all five songs correctly.

“Never knew that you like indie bands,” Eren said, finishing his last bite before he wiped his hands on the napkins.

“And I never knew that you’re this disgusting. Wash your hands in the bathroom, will you?” Levi told him. It was more like a command, really, but he did what he was told to anyway. But not without doing anything childishly, like sticking his tongue out to the older male. That seemed to bite his ass back though, because the lawyer started up his less-than-friendly-humor.

“I’ll bite that tongue if you don’t hurry the fuck up, brat.”

It definitely sent him to the restroom instantly, and with red tinted cheeks.

 

* * *

 

_The wind is nice._ It was Eren’s only thought as he laid down his cheek on his arm that was stretched across the hard surface of the car door. The window was rolled all the way down and he could see how the road was like on a precipice but with the blue sky all laid out for the people to gaze upon. There was no cloud in sight and he smiled as he thought that maybe Levi checked the weather news or something before he jumped the gun and asked Eren out on a date. Well, more like didn’t give him a choice and demanded him to get dressed within ten minutes. It didn’t make him love this day any less, though; it only made him happier, because everything that occurred since the moment he woke up was so Levi-like.

He closed his eyes and focused on how the gentle breeze that was caused by the car speeding up was soothingly caressing his face, loving how the strands of his hair was pushed back and the feeling of the wind. There was something strangely enticing about the idea of the air lifting him up and allowing him to fly up high. He regretted that he didn’t discover sooner how could a drive feel peaceful and exhilarating at the same time. It prompted him to break the comfortable silence between him and Levi.

“Five years ago, I wouldn’t even have second thoughts about turning down a good car ride. I wouldn’t even thought of myself riding a car,” he started; his eyes were still closed. When Levi didn’t respond to him, he continued, “After my mom’s car accident, I was…scared. That’s why I don’t have a car and I take the train to go to school.”

There was a pause as if it was needed for his words to sink in before Levi spoke, “And you’re okay now.” It was probably meant to be a question, or just an observation; Eren couldn’t tell.

“Yeah. Strangely enough, I’m okay now. It was like a rehab for me, you know. I used to get anxiety getting into a car until last year; I seem to be all right with it now,” he explained.

“At least, you won’t throw up on me or my car now,” Levi offered nonchalantly, but it was probably his way of lightening up the mood. And he succeeded because a small smile broke out of Eren’s face as he hummed.

 

* * *

 

“Oh my god. It’s the beach!”

Eren’s excited voice could’ve reached the opposite shore but Levi didn’t mind that because the young man started chasing the waves that were sashaying back and forth, dragging the sand with them. Eren stopped for a second to pull up his jeans, folding the ends of them until they reached his knees, and then he ran to the water again as Levi followed him but not too closely. He really didn’t want to slosh back inside his car with disgustingly wet shoes or pants—which brought him his current predicament.

“Oh, you brat. I’m not letting you run water in my car,” he warned him. Eren didn’t mind the insult he threw in as he conspicuously ignored it and the brunet now started heading to Levi’s direction. Oh, he had a bad feeling about this.

And sometimes, he hated it when he was right.

He tried to hightail out of there, but Eren caught him off-guard because he was stupidly full of energy even with the warm breeze that indicated that summer was approaching. The brunet grabbed his arm, and silently patted himself on back for wearing a dark gray shirt that merely reached his elbows, before he was hauled out of his safe distance from the water. He put up a fight of course, but for some reason, his usual monstrous strength wasn’t at its best when the brat was around. Curse his soft side for Eren.

“Let me go,” he demanded, voice was sounding feral without actually meaning it. Apparently, Eren had already known his way around Levi’s expressions and behavior, and he wondered if the young man could actually read his emotions that he was trying to conceal behind that cold demeanor of his. 

“It’s the beach, Levi. You’re supposed to enjoy the water and hunt for seashells or something!” Eren reprimanded him. The older male wondered if the teal-eyed lad had noticed that they weren’t the only ones around the area; there was a woman who was already walking away after her sunbathing and there was a teenager climbing up the rocks like he was showing off that he owned the world. Knowing that the cheery buzz around Eren wouldn’t die off soon, he silently surrendered.

He grumbled, “Fine.” Levi then rolled his black jeans (he really should’ve worn shorts, instead), and he watched his little brat run back to the water. Hesitating a little, he stopped short to the distance where the waves caught his toes.

“Here,” Eren softly called out, a hand was raised and being offered to Levi. For some reason, a whole stupid cliché popped out in his head. Eren’s figure was behind the freaking horizon with the sun slowly setting down, for crying out loud! And don’t get him started with those sparkling Caribbean eyes. He was already drowning in them as he was.

He nonetheless took Eren’s hand, feeling the warmth in them that made his chest squeeze. He laid his palm against the younger’s before he intertwined them together, fingers closing in between. There were no words needed at that moment because the smiles that they exchanged with each other had already said a lot. Levi was definitely pulled into that fast current called Eren Jaeger and he had no way of freeing himself nor he wanted to. Because next to his lover was where he found his place.

It was where he found himself genuinely happy.

 

* * *

 

They stayed in the beach for hours and had dried themselves outside of the car, squeezing the ends of their jeans to get the water out. Not that it helped. Before they knew it, the night had already fallen and the crickets were already causing a racket. Eren’s eyes caught the twinkling stars littered on the sky and he let out an audible gasp which was most likely heard by his companion because Levi turned around to face him. The older male also started looking up, wanting to find out what had kept the younger entranced, and he found himself also staring at the small fireballs seemingly blinking in the dark sky.

“They’re so pretty,” Eren said. Unbeknownst to him, Levi’s gray eyes were averted off the stars to the certain brunet who was still distracted by the sight before him.

“Yeah, so beautiful,” Levi murmured softly. Eren had heard him though, and he lifted his eyes off the sky and settle them to the older man whose head turned away from him. He raised an eyebrow and was about to ask him questions about it, but an idea popped out in his mind. A grin formed on his face before he unceremoniously dropped his whole weight on the hood of Levi’s car.

“What are you doing?”

“Lying down?”

“Tsk.”

Eren felt the cold, hard metal against his slightly damped shirt (he had taken off the button-up shirt earlier), and he got himself comfortable by welcoming the chilliness that initially made him shiver to the bones. His eyes found the stars again before Levi blocked them for a second, then settled himself next to the brunet. Their fingers touched and a spark lit up their nerves, leaving their skin tingling and desiring for more, and that one touch didn’t make them flinch this time. It was something that they got used to and had learned to indulge. And as cheesy as it would sound like, it was like a sign that was telling them that they were meant to be.

Like they were fated to be together.

“I told Mikasa about us,” Eren said. The atmosphere around them was so serene that he was afraid to break it, because the topic that he was going to discuss was in no way a casual one.

“She gave me a phone call after she got my number from her dad, threatening to burn me alive if I hurt you. She sounded like she was drunk though,” Levi told him, amusement danced in his eyes.

“Well, I certainly did _not_ know that. That was probably after the reunion.”

“She got wasted?”

“Nah. She’s responsible, and even made sure that I slept over at her house. She’s really, _really, really_ overprotective.”

Levi smirked. “I can tell.”

Eren shifted nervously, eyes darting from the sky to the beach at the corner of his eyes. He had to tell Levi; it was now or never. He promised that he would trust Levi and the same went with him so there was really no need to hesitate around and let his conscience smack-talk him. But he knew what was eating him in the inside. It wasn’t only about the trust between them that he was worrying about. Sure, the conversation, or rather his confession, could potentially crack what they had built together, but it could be fixed if they let each other try and give it another chance, right? There was another thing that was making Eren’s heart throb painfully, sending pangs to his chest and squeezing it tight until he couldn’t breath despite the plentiful of air around him. The thought flying around his mind was unbearable.

The thought of hurting Levi was unbearable.

“I let Jean kiss me.”

The insects were still chirping and there was the audible crashing of the waves against the rocks. The road was silent and so were the stars. And so was Levi. It was all too much, and Eren was already on the brink of tears because he knew that he fucked up something. He knew that he hurt Levi when he caught that flash of pain across the older man’s face.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t keep my promise.” His voice cracked and Levi turned his body sideways so he was completely facing Eren as their legs dangled together but not touching.

“Why?” Levi simply asked, face was devoid of any emotions but there was the pressing need for answers in his eyes.

“Because he needed it. I think I also needed it,” Eren replied. His voice didn’t waver nor stuttered, and he felt like he had to be strangely calm about it because Levi seemed to take it so well. There was no anger or pain or confusion in his eyes or face anymore, but there was something else—something familiar that made Eren’s heart flutter relentlessly.

“Eren.” The way he called his name made his stomach twist in an oddly pleasant way, and the organ caged in his ribcage wasn’t doing any better because its endless fluttering was now accompanied by that usual throb he felt around Levi. He wondered if it were possible to get a heart attack just by seeing the love of your life right in front of your eyes because if it was, then he would surely be fucked.

 “Mmm?” he hummed mindlessly, staring into those silver pools.

“I can’t say those words to you yet because I’m afraid that I would fuck this whole thing up, and knowing myself, I probably will.” He was about to argue against him but he was silenced by Levi’s hand. “I’m not a guy who will be openly romantic with you, but I can take you to wherever you want, be it the gates of heaven or hell. I’m not the guy who will incessantly please you because I have a fucking stubborn personality and trust me when I say that we’ll clash against each other, have those stupid fights. But we will _definitely_ make up, whether it be words or kisses or a mind-blowing sex.” Eren blushed at the last one, and Levi flashed him a grin. “What? Are you telling me that you don’t want to have sex with me?”

“I didn’t say that!” Eren spluttered, turning redder and redder by the second. Even with his face tomato red, he managed to gather his thoughts and murmured softly, “Nothing’s definite, you know. We might…leave each other.”

Levi leaned in closer, pulling Eren towards him until their bodies were touching; legs and feet were tangled together. He closed the space between them until they were a breath away as the night swallowed more of the light shade of the sky, turning midnight blue and letting the stars shine more brightly than before. Hearts drumming against their chest, almost painfully yet welcoming, they shared the air between them as their lips slightly brushed against each other. The surface underneath them was now warm and was comforting enough that they completely forgot that they were lying on the hood of the car. The world fell away; the waves stopped, the insects were quiet, and the breeze was absent. There was only the sky above them, reflecting their own image in each other’s eyes as they refused to tear their gaze down. Levi spoke, and it was only that familiar deep voice that Eren all heard.

“Nothing’s may be definite, but I’m willing to make you an exception, Eren.”

And he sealed it with a kiss, with the stars as the witness of his promise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What do you think? XD omg this is like the second to the last chapter before I get to my regular update, which is Thursdays D: Sorry guys, after Chapter 11, you'll have to wait every week until I type up the next chapter. Thank you very much for your comments and kudos!


	11. Red

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eren's nightmare resurfaces and becomes reality.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woah thank you so much for reading this and I hope well... I hope you don't kill me after this chapter. LOL

**I don’t own Snk**

* * *

 

_“The loneliest people are the kindest. The saddest people smile the brightest. The most damaged people are the wisest. All because they do not wish to see anyone else suffer the way they do.”  
-Anonymous_

* * *

 

**~Chapter Eleven: Red~**

           

_“Hey, Eren! Come back here!”_

_A woman with long, brown hair had her hands on her hips and there was a playful scolding look in her light brown eyes. She was beckoning for a little boy to approach her but the boy was merely grinning and incessantly running in circles around her._

_“I’ll tickle you!” she teasingly threatened, making claws with her hands before she started chasing the little child. They were on some lawn, grass was freshly mowed and the leaves on the trees were happily swaying around with the breeze. The woman made sounds that were meant to be frightening like it came out of a children’s cartoon show, and the boy showed his enthusiasm in playing the role of the victim. The tuft of chestnut brown hair was moving with the wind as he excitedly ran across the lawn with the woman behind him._

_“Mom!” he squealed as his mother caught his arms, and he was lifted into the air the next second. His grin was so wide that his two missing front teeth were showing as he flapped his arms around and his mother danced them around in circles._

_“Mom!” he called out happily again, his eyes finding the soft smile on the woman’s face and the shine that was reflected on her irises. He laughed and laughed until he was out of breath, ready to be put down and play on the solid ground again. He called out again, but it was different this time._

_“MOM!”_

_His voice changed from that boyish, innocent one into a much deeper voice. The sound that he made was almost stuck in his throat, like some lump had clogged it, and there was that tremble that indicated how frightened he was. He was not on a lawn anymore, no more fresh green grass or the tall trees that provided a shade from the direct beating of the sunlight. He was in total darkness, grasping into nothingness with no ray of light to guide him, and he was sure that he was alone. He realized that the woman he called his mom wasn’t holding him anymore, and he tried to work his voice again to no avail. He couldn’t speak—couldn’t see—anything. The sensation that seized up his heart was outright daunting and he felt himself heaving as his lips opened and closed to cooperate with his organ that was breathing fire now. The air was too thin for his comfort and he wondered if he would suffocate and die. The lack of companion by his side—his own isolation—made him think that maybe dying wasn’t the worst thing that could happen now. He just wanted air._

_He wanted to breathe again._

_But he had no time to even mouth a prayer to hope for a better disposition, because his eyes opened without him meaning them to. They were just pried open like his brain was doing its own function without his really controlling it. It was a weird feeling. He knew that he was there, drowning—suffocating—in darkness, which somehow turned into something with colors. However, it was not the hue that he wanted to see._

_Because he only saw red._

_Red behind his eyelids, red on his hands, red on the webbed-crack of the glass, red on his mother’s cheeks, and red on her temples._

_He reached out to touch her, but the thread of his breath snapped and he stopped breathing._

_“Eren?”_

“Eren!”

He gasped, coughing and spluttering as he tried to take mouthfuls of air because that sickening squeeze in his chest was probably going to send him to the hospital for cardiac arrest. His heart was loud— _very_ loud—that his ears couldn’t make out the sounds surrounding him and his eyes weren’t helping either, because they were swirling and tilting the world around. The throbbing in his chest didn’t go away, but it slowed down to a manageable rate where he could actually make out the ceiling of grey right in front of his eyes. He also remembered that he was still in the car, strapped to a seat with a seatbelt across his chest and he vaguely noticed that the car wasn’t moving anymore.

“Wh-What?” he choked out, turning his head to the front where he could make out distinct lights twinkling and tall buildings looming ahead of them. It took him a moment to realize that he was not alone in the car and that there was Levi, the person that he spent his entire day with. With a hazy mind, he recalled falling asleep on the headrest of the passenger seat after stargazing and sharing kisses with the grey-eyed man. However, these all seemed so distant with his mind swimming with fragmented memories of his dream.

“Are you okay?” Levi asked, worry was laced in his voice, and he didn’t bother to even hide the expression on his face. He looked downright freaked out and concerned about Eren. There was panic in those usual fierce grey eyes and the young man couldn’t help but feel guilty because he must have had done something that made Levi pull over to one corner of the road.

“I-I’m okay,” he replied weakly despite his effort of putting force onto his voice to reassure his lover. It didn’t work, especially because he finally noticed that his whole body was trembling—from shaking that should’ve rattled the bones of his fingers to his legs that had turned into a pile of jelly. The sight of him had definitely scared Levi, because he was scared himself.

“You were screaming. Is this another attack?” Levi slowly asked him, as if afraid of his reaction _. As if it could get any worse_. Eren closed his eyes, inhaling and exhaling as his current mantra, and calming himself was no easy task. It must have had taken ten or twenty minutes or even longer than that, but the older male patiently waited for him. Levi even rubbed his back after telling him to lean forward and unbuckle the strap that was certainly not helping his breathing.

“It’s usually not this bad,” he said, blood was flowing to his body and was finally cooperating, bringing the oxygen that he needed.

“Is there a trigger or something?”

The brunet caught the lack of rumble of the vehicle and thought that Levi might have had killed the engine, just to proved the fact that they had stayed on the side of the road longer than he intended to. His eyes landed on the clock, green lights were dully flashing in the car, and it said 11:10 PM.

“No—I mean, I don’t know. I haven’t had consecutive attacks before. I only had two, and—it’s probably just a dream. I’m-I’m even starting to forget it now,” he stammered, frustrated because his dream was really fading away. And the last thing he wanted to remain in his mind seemed to be the only fragment that he could keep, and it was that damn color: red.

“Did you ask your doctor about it?” Levi asked, eyebrows were furrowed at the thought, as he cautiously eyed Eren and stopped his soothing gestures on the lad’s back. The brunet looked conflicted, a flurry of more emotions brewing in his chest, and he thought of the last time he had visited a doctor. It had been five years.

“No,” he answered honestly. It earned a sigh from Levi who pinched the bridge of his nose, not in irritation but in agitation. It caused Eren to bite his lip, slightly regretting that he didn’t just tell a white lie so Levi wouldn’t have to worry about it. However, what took place between them today had made him more motivated in his goal of being candid and open to his lover. And what he probably needed right there was someone he could confide with, but the fear in his heart had paralyzed him again.

_No. I can’t tell Levi about this if I don’t know what’s going on myself._

“I promise that I’ll do that, though,” he compromised. Hearing that made Levi look at him appreciatively, and he returned the small smile that Eren gave him.

“Alright. I’ll hold onto your word, brat. Or I’ll have Hanji bother you every damn second until you get that check up.”

It was all endearing, really, but the thought of a certain redhead showing up to his classes unceremoniously would be a little mortifying, especially if his professors would mind the not-so-little intrusion.

“Come here,” Levi gently gesture, his hand motioning for Eren to come closer and he did. The older male put his hand on Eren’s soft brown locks and lightly pulled him to his shoulder, where the brunet could rest his head. It made him feel warm inside, thawing the ice that froze his veins and his heart, making him breathe normally. He still couldn’t get rid the pieces of his dream—his nightmare—out of his mind, but they were shoved to the back of his brain as the comfort that Levi was providing him now was making him forget all of those bad things. It made him focus on what he had now.

On what he could lose.

The thought made his nerves freeze up again, and he buried his face on the crook of Levi’s neck, seeking more of that warmth that could dissolve his worries. He felt an arm wound up around his shoulder and his nose worked with that familiar scent, letting himself be drugged with it and take him to heights. His mouth opened to speak but like in his dream, he was rendered incapable of voicing anything out. He couldn’t ask Levi the reassurance that he needed.

_Please, don’t leave me._

* * *

Eren pushed open the door of the bakery and his eyes immediately caught the face of a familiar friend of his, one that he just saw last week. Those baby blue eyes glittered in recognition and a smile made it to her angelic face.

“Krista!”

“Hello, Eren!”

He made his way to the table she was sitting at, glancing at the counter to check if Ymir was there but she was not. The blonde-haired girl had probably seen the question in his eyes because she said “she’s at the kitchen, helping Hitch.”

It wasn’t his time to clock in yet and he probably had more time because today was the day that Mike would come back to the shop. Hitch was a good baker too, but there was no denying that there was something different in her bread and pastries compared to the owner’s. It really was a wonder how could a FBI agent have such good cooking skills. Ymir had been a great help in the bakery too, putting aside her crude humor and sarcastic remarks, and the thought of the dark-skinned woman made Eren curious so he took a seat across from Krista.

“Are you visiting Ymir?” he asked, not wanting to be outright blunt with the gentle girl.

“Yes,” she said and her smile never left her face. If Eren were straight, there would be no doubt that he would fall for this goddess-looking young woman. He remembered that times when Krista had helped him out patch some of his bruises or cuts during high school; he was a delinquent-looking guy so he somehow attracted the worst students from other school. Jean, of course, was there to help him beat up some of those belligerent kids, or in some occasions, it was actually the two of them who threw punches to each other. Wow, he was really…different back then, now that he thought about it.

“What are you thinking about, Eren?” Krista asked, snapping him out of his train of thoughts.

The green-eyed lad made a straight face and stated, “I just can’t believe that I was a delinquent back in high school.”

His friend giggled and no matter how girly it sounded, it was nothing compared to the other girls. It was in fact infectious and soothing, which led to his thinking that maybe the blue-eyed woman had some hidden healing abilities.

“That’s true. But you did protect me that one time,” she told him.

Eren remembered that day clearly. It was this one autumn night when he was about to go home and he saw a bunch of guys crowding at a corner of the street. He just got back from Armin’s house, playing video games with him, Jean and Mikasa. Then, he got a glimpse of a familiar face with straight blonde hair and blue eyes, which he thought was Armin’s at first before his mind countered that he just saw his friend a while ago. When he got closer to the three guys wearing uniforms (he gathered that they were from a private school), he made out the timid voice that he usually heard in his class. That was when he swung his fist towards the first guy who was terribly close to the girl and that led to more involvement of kicks and punches.

“And Ymir showed up, knocking the last asshole out,” he added, an amused grin on his face.

“I’ll never forget that day. It was like two heroes suddenly showed up in front of me!” Krista exclaimed happily. She looked genuinely entertained with the memory like Eren was.

“Then, I took you to Annie the next day and we both learned karate. That was fun.”

“It was. Ymir made me practice with her and I, err, almost broke her rib,” the blonde said bashfully. Eren could imagine Ymir convincing a hesitant Krista to do self-defense with her and the look of surprise on her face when the angelic-looking girl displayed some exceptional physical power to her must had been priceless. He learned that firsthand when Annie coached them, and he’d rather not challenge the blonde again.

“Really, but I’m thankful that you did those things to me, though. Thank you, Eren,” Krista sincerely said.

The brunet smiled and replied, “You’re welcome. I call it even though, because you did help wrapping me up with bandages.”

She laughed and told him, “It’s thanks to you that I learned how to bandage someone up, you know.”

“Really? Wow.”

“Yup.”

“Well, are you just gonna sit around there or are you gonna work?” Ymir’s voice startled the calm atmosphere around the two of them, but the woman looked amused because she had a small smile on her face. Her golden brown eyes held that tenderness in them as they landed on Krista. It reminded Eren that he didn’t manage to ask Krista the question that he wanted to ask.

“Fine, fine. I’ll clock in. Have fun with your girlfriend now,” he said, intentionally testing the waters. The response that he got was more than satisfying because neither of them denied it; there was a smirk on Ymir’s lips and a blush on Krista’s face _. Ohh_. _So I was right._

He hurried to the back room but was stopped by Ymir’s straightforwardness, which he wasn’t able to show earlier.

“Are you with that shortie now?”

 He eyed her curiously and thought _how does she know_ , before replying, “Yeah…”

“Good.”

Well, that was odd. It prompted him to ask, “Why do you ask?”

She stared at him like he was the least interesting human being on the planet before rolling her eyes. “I didn’t just poke fun on that midget for nothing. I knew that he would explode one way or the other.”

“You planned that?!” he squeaked incredulously.

Ymir walked up to him and patted his shoulder. “I feel like neither of you has the balls to actually push your relationship so I did it for you, hun.”

“Ymir, you shouldn’t have done that! Maybe they were trying to work it out themselves,” Krista scolded her, intercepting into their conversation.

The brunet merely gave both girls a smile. “Don’t worry. It worked out, alright. I thought you were just spewing your wonderful sarcasm as always, Ymir.”

“And you’re definitely learning. You better cover my shift tomorrow night,” she sang before she went back to Krista. The blonde sent the other woman a smile full of fondness and there was something that looked recognizable in it—it was love. He had seen it many times in the unusual small smiles of Levi and they were only reserved for him and him alone. He’d never seen the lawyer smile that often with anybody else and he felt special because he was the one to witness that side of him. It was the same thing for Ymir and Krista, and the cloud of bliss and ease between the two made him miss the certain grey-eyed man. And it hadn’t been a day when he last saw him.

He went to the backroom, watching the couple leave the bakery, and he started working. It was already late in the afternoon and there was usually a swarm of students ready to buy some snacks after a day of enduring what seemed to be the evil-invention called school. He could sympathize with them because he had been there, and he was thankful that his art classes in college had given him a break from his other subjects that were unnecessarily difficult.

His shift rolled by and he only had half an hour left before he should close down. Hitch had already left a few hours ago, leaving him to listen to the music he put on his iPod. He also took the chance to bring out his homework and somehow study the lesson that they went over in his psychology class this morning. However, he ended up taking out his sketchbook and began drawing things that he could see. At some point, he was in the middle of contouring the outline of his boyfriend’s face when he heard that light chime, indicating that someone had entered the shop. He looked up and smiled when he saw his blonde-haired boss.

“Yo, Captain,” he greeted him with a salute.

“Hey, Eren. It’s been a while. How’s the shop?” Mike asked, returning his smile. Before Eren could reply, his boss was already sniffing the air like he usually did.

 “Well, that certainly doesn’t smell burnt dough, which means that you hadn’t tried to go to the kitchen.” Mike laughed.

The brunet resisted rolling his eyes and resorted to shaking his head in playful disapproval. “You’re the one who took me in, Cap. You tell me.”

“Yeah… it’s been more than two years, eh?”

“Mhm. How’s your vacation?” Eren asked, interested as to how the owner had spent his vacation after unceremoniously dropping by at his apartment a week ago. That felt like months ago, but he somehow recalled Mike having a blue cast in his arm.

“It was okay, I guess. I still did work, though.” There was a troubled look that flickered across his face before he smoothed it out. It made the green-eyed lad more curious than ever.

“FBI stuff?” he pressed on.

Mike raised an eyebrow at him, and from where he was standing with the lights from the outside casting a big shadow in the background, the blonde never looked more dangerous. Eren swallowed his saliva as quietly as possible.

“Eren, has there been anything weird happening around you lately?” Mike asked, and like last week, he had dodged the young man’s question again.

“Define weird.”

His boss simply laughed like he was just messing around with him but there was that definite edge that made Eren wonder if half of the stuff that they were about to say was actually true, because he said, “I don’t know, like strangers talking to you? Pulling a weapon on you and holding you at gunpoint? There is a lot of dangerous stuff happening around, kid. You really should be careful.”

  _Well, I did talk to a stranger a few months ago and now he’s my boyfriend._ He held that thought though.

“It could happen to anyone, you know,” Eren slowly said, scrutinizing any reaction that he could get from the older man. “So why are you telling me this?”

 “No particular reason,” Mike replied casually, shrugging his shoulders. Though, he repeated solemnly, “I’m worried about you. I’ve seen you wandered around at night and I’m telling you that you’re bound to get in trouble if you’re alone. You should ask Levi to be with you after work.” He started cleaning up, pushing the chairs into the table and shutting the blinds of the big window, as Eren got a dishrag and began wiping the counter.

“Okay.” He wanted to ask if he had talked to Levi, by how he was addressing him now like he was a friend, and maybe they were now more than acquaintances considering that Erwin was one of Levi’s close friends.

He stopped in the middle of his cleaning as he felt the hard object pressed on his chest. He remembered now that there _was_ something strange that had happened to him, but the subject was too personal for him. He never really thought about how his dad’s key somehow ended up in a box right in front of his door. It was suspicious, and it made him think if his memories were just screwed up and he somehow mistook the key as his father’s. But why would it be delivered under his name and at his apartment?

Then, he recalled that night of the gallery show. There was a man who was looking at his artwork like it was such an extraordinary sight to be gaze upon, but Eren knew that he wasn’t interested in it. The man with the bowler hat was fixated on his _name_. He hadn’t really given time to think about that occurrence and now that Mike seemed so freaked out about a lot of things regarding Eren, it was now making him a little spooked too. He checked the time on his iPod, which was next to his black leather-bound sketchbook, and he couldn’t help the smile that graced his face. Levi was going to pick him up and they were going to watch movies again, but this time they were going to the lawyer’s house.

However, every thought of his flew out of the window as it shattered with the sounds that echoed through the creeping night.

“EREN, DUCK DOWN!” He heard Mike shout out, and he was already crouched down behind the counter as multiple more bullets started to put holes on everything, glass bursting into million pieces and wood being punctured.

His ears were ringing even if he had his hands over them, threatening to deafen him as if the erratic thudding of his heart was not loud enough. He thought his ribcage was going to break because of how strong its rhythm was, and it reminded him of his dream he had not too long ago. All of a sudden, his chest tightened without his control and air rushed out of his lungs, his organ seemingly burning.

“EREN, STAY DOWN! DON’T MOVE!” Mike began yelling orders out again, and the brunet wanted to reply sarcastically “I think my legs became a pile of jell-o, anyways.” He really could use some of Ymir’s crude humor now. And Levi…

Oh no…

Before he could think further about his lover, the glass around the counter exploded, showering some sharp chunks to Eren.  He pulled himself closer until he was just a ball of fear. He was already breaking out in sweat and he vaguely noticed that the gunshots had somehow decreased, but there was a closer sound to him and it prompted him to look around the wooden counter that he was hiding at. His green eyes scanned his surroundings, heart at his throat as he took in the chairs and walls patched with bullet holes and there was that table that was turned sideways. Mike had probably used it as a shield. Then, he found his boss leaning at the corner where an awkward jutted wall was located. He had a gun in his hand, and his eyes met Eren’s. They held urgency and he mouthed for him to go to the back room, motioning with his hand frantically, and the frightened man realized that the gunshots had ceased. He exhaled a shaky breath, letting his adrenaline kicked in.

Then, he took flight.

His legs almost buckled, a bit numb from his uncomfortable position behind his hiding spot, but he willed them to work. He could hear his blood rushing and without a doubt, he would most likely have a heart attack before he could reach his destination. Time seemed to slow down dramatically at that moment, but he didn’t let it hinder him. He kept running, pumping blood to his body, and the room that was merely six steps away seemed to be six miles now. He kicked the door open and shut it close, gasping like a fish out of the water.

He needed air.

He needed to breathe.

Eren flared up his nostrils and open his mouth to gain the oxygen that he needed, to get his mind working again. He heard gunshots again and he instinctively hunched down behind the door, his back pressed on it almost painfully so. His heart didn’t stop its abnormal heartbeat, and he remembered his phone in the back pocket of his jeans. He reached out, arms were severely shaking, to pull the smartphone out. He couldn’t get any coherent thoughts from his brain, but he knew that he had to call 911. He pressed the numbers and the call button immediately.

He didn’t know what he told them but there were words “gunshots”, “bakery” and “Rose St” before he fumbled with his phone again. He was unaware that his tears were spilling down his cheeks. He really was scared. So scared.

He thought of his mom, Mikasa, Armin, and his second family. He thought of his friends—Jean, Annie, Krista, Ymir. And Levi…

Before he knew it, he was already calling the lawyer. His phone was pressed on his ear again as he flinched when a round of bullets caused vibrations against the door.

_“Eren?”_

“Le-Levi…” he sobbed out. He swallowed, his mind clearing and was focusing on one thought—on one image. He focused on those grey eyes that would warm up at the sight of him, those soft lips that were upon his under the stars, that short stature, and his face that would unconsciously glow when he was with Eren.

More gunshots.

_“EREN, WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING THERE?!”_

“Do-Don’t come. If y-you do, b-bring the cops. Promise me, L-Levi,” Eren gritted between his teeth. He couldn’t stop his trembling.

_“Holy shit. Eren—“_

“LEVI, PLEASE!”

_“Shh, okay. Okay. J-Just don’t move from where you are. I’ll bring Erwin with me.”_

There were sharp raps on the door and he dropped his phone in surprise. Eyes widening, his eyes looked for anything that he could protect himself with. He stopped when he heard ragged breaths and that deep voice of Mike.

“Eren…hah…it’s me.”

The brunet let out a big sigh of relief, hastily opening the door. He yelped in shock and almost fell backward when a weight was unexpectedly dropped on him.

“M-MIKE!” He shouted as the older man wheezed out on his shoulder. Eren held his body, not wanting for the man to suddenly drop on the floor, and he felt a slick, warm sensation. His mind reeled at the thought that it could be what he thought it was. His heart was about to break as he lifted one of his hands to his vision.

It was that color again.

He felt nauseous; his eyes were trained on the crimson liquid on his hand as he held Mike with one arm. His rapid breathing was almost comparable to the older man’s.

“We have to get you to the hospital,” he said steadily. Mike was most likely losing more blood by the passing moment, and watching the man bleed his life out was not something that Eren wanted to witness. He wanted to prevent it.

He carefully laid his boss on the floor, once white was now red too, and this time he looked for the gauges. His friends took care of the bandaging for him in the past, but he needed something to stop or clean up Mike’s wounds himself now. He found paper towels, which was better than nothing, and dropped on his knees in front of the blonde, examining where his injury was. When he saw the bleeding hole in his torso, he forced down the bitter revulsion that went through his body. He couldn’t afford to vomit right now when he had to help someone. His hands were shaking even more badly than before and he glanced at Mike, whose eyes were tightly closed, a look of pain on his face, before he started to clean the blood.

An image resurfaced behind his eyelids, replacing Mike’s face, and he gasped loudly when he recognized it. He blinked and blinked and blinked, trying to get rid of the haunting picture. He shut his eyes tightly, tears flowing down, as he was determined to not think of it.

Of his mom. Oh her, bleeding to death.

“Eren.” Mike softly called out, eyes were now staring worriedly at him. Heck, his boss really should be worried about himself, not Eren!

“Why are you protecting me? Is-Is this why you were so worried?” he asked, but the FBI agent kept his mouth in a tight line.

“Eren—“

“This has something to do with me. Right? What are you hiding from me?”

A beat of silence passed and there was a look of pity in those brown eyes staring down to him. He then spoke with utter gravity, “Your life is in danger, and I’ve been protecting you. If you find out more information about this—“

His breath hitched in his throat. “Why am I in danger? What information?”

“I can’t tell you that…”

“MIKE! MY LIFE IS IN DANGER AND YOU CAN’T—“

“Your mom’s death is _not_ an accident, Eren.”

He felt his stomach drop. His heart had probably stopped beating because he couldn’t hear the throbbing pulse in his ears anymore. He could only feel icy cold, his nerves were stilled and his mind shut down. It was as if the ground beneath him had opened up and he was falling into an endless abyss, dark and frightening with no definite end.

His green eyes stared at Mike, unbelieving and now unforgiving.

“What…What did you just say?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry... Oh God, I know, that's like the worst cliffhanger (or one of the worst anyway). But I hope that I kept you on the edge throughout the entire chapter hahaha My regular updates will start now, I'm sorry. I hope you start looking forward to Thursdays :D And yes, there will be one this Thursday :)


	12. Turbulence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eren wakes up in the hospital with Levi by his side. He finds out the truth that will restrain him from becoming the Eren Jaeger he once was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry if there are some mistakes D: I tried my best to proofread and everything. Hope you'll enjoy this~

**I don’t own SnK**

* * *

 

_“The truth is that airports saw more sincere kisses than wedding halls. The walls of hospitals have heard more prayers than the walls of the churches.”  
-Anonymous_

* * *

 

**~Chapter Twelve: Turbulence~**

 

Numbness. That was the only thing he could feel. Really, how ironic was that? The water behind his eyelids that slid down his cheeks, the warm, slick blood on his hands, his heart that seemed to stop with the time and his stomach that flipped with bitter nausea—they were the things that he _should_ feel, but his senses were dulled. He couldn’t even hear the deafening sounds of the sirens, which couldn’t be far from him but they seemed like a hundred miles away. He just saw and heard Mike, his boss with a hole on his stomach, uttering that statement.

_“Your mom’s death is not an accident, Eren.”_

Five years of his life—and he was forced to give up on looking for the coward who caused the car crash that took his mom’s life away. It was five years ago when he had to stand there near the case where the cold body of his mother was put into, obligated to accept everyone’s condolences even though he wanted nothing more than to dash away from that place and find the source of all the grief and sorrow hallowing his heart. The most important person in his life was stolen away from him because of an accident. And now he found out that it was _not_ like that at all?

He felt the ground beneath his feet caved away, like his entire being was falling and falling and falling, because everything that he had believed on at that point had turned out to be a lie. He believed that the man who caused the accident might have been scared because he had a family to feed and he couldn’t afford to get behind the bars. He believed that even though he didn’t remember anything that night it happened, he would still be able to find peace for himself and he would be able to let go of the past.

So how come everything seemed to be crumbling into pieces?

He barely registered the door of the back room being pushed from the outside; they could’ve had crashed it open and he wouldn’t even notice it. Mike had moved away, calling out something to the people on the other side of the door, but Eren didn’t hear any of it. Three men and a woman held their guns and all of them were dressed with that dark material of clothing. He recognized one of them, a tall guy with a meticulously combed blonde hair, and he was shaking the brunet away out of his stupor. He was still kneeling on the ground while the others were taking Mike away; a stretcher was ready for him to be placed on. The blonde agent knelt in front of him; his mouth was opening and closing like he was saying something to him. And he really was.

“Eren, can you hear me? Are you alright?” he asked frantically, thick eyebrows were furrowing in deep worry. He placed a hand on the young man’s shoulder and attempted to shake him out of his trance, but he didn’t—couldn’t—respond. He then placed both of those big hands of his on Eren’s and shook him a little harder, but not hard enough that his head would roll back and forth. The last thing that both of them needed was for the brunet to worsen his mental and emotional state.

When he regained a bit of his bearings, Eren first noticed the feeling of the dampness on his cheeks, which was slowly turning crusty.  He then recognized the man in front of him. Erwin, Levi’s friend.

Levi.

At the thought of that name, it was like an ice cold bucket of water was dumped on him and he convulsed out of his unconsciousness. He whipped his head everywhere, trying to piece everything together, from the gunshots in the bakery that seemed to echo in his ears even now, to the moment Mike slid on his shoulder, a wound threatening to spill his life out of him. There were traces of that crimson liquid on the once white tiled floors, and the revulsion that he kept down inside had hit him with its full force. His green eyes widened in panic and he found the garbage can near the lockers. Erwin seemed to get the gist of it and he immediately ran to the wastebasket and placed it in front of Eren with a loud thud. The brunet let the vomit come out; head almost halfway into the bin and his fringes was stuck to his sweat. It could’ve been just several seconds of keeling on the bloody floor, guts seemed to be clogged in his throat, or maybe a few minutes or even an hour had passed.

However, nothing came.

It insistently remained stuck somewhere in him and he could only cry because it was painful.

It was _goddamned painful._

He didn’t know when Erwin walked away from him; barely even felt that he was rubbing his back soothingly when he was trying to puke all his nerves out. It was when that familiar warm hand touched his cheek that he knew.

He knew that _he_ was there.

Levi was giving him an atypical look and Eren’s own teal eyes stared back at the reflection presented on those gray ones. He saw a terrified and disheveled man, looking lost with no instrument to find his way back. Then he realized with a jolt that the same fear he felt was mirrored in those beautiful eyes. He wasn’t the one who felt that frightening feeling clawing at his chest.

Levi had also been scared.

And Eren felt guilty because he was the one who put that expression on his beloved’s face. He could see by how those eyes followed the traces of the blood on the floor to the brunet’s hands, that he was shaken by what happened. It wasn’t only Eren who was affected, he realized, and that deep tug in his heart made him want to hit himself. He almost lost Mike and yet he yelled at him after he saved his life. Erwin was trying to help him but he ignored his presence and focused on himself alone. He wasn’t the one who got injured and yet Levi was showing that face like he had lost him. How many people were going to get hurt because of him?

He wondered if maybe he also had something to do with his mom’s death.

_No._

He shook his head, trying to get rid of the thoughts that were threatening to kill him in the inside. He willed himself to focus on that familiar face inches away from him, and he tried to regain a hold of his five senses again, wanting nothing more than to reassure his lover that everything was fine. That it was all going to be okay.

But he knew that it was not, and would not be by a long shot.

“Eren?” He called out to him, anxiety laced with his voice, and he touched both of his cheeks. The sound of his name rolling off his tongue was more than reassuring enough and it reminded him of how loving he was—how he felt at home when his presence was around. The younger man closed his eyes and the thought of shutting everything down, giving into the darkness, was suddenly too tempting to pass up. At that moment, he desired nothing but to fall asleep in the arms of the man that he loved. He just wanted to pretend that none of these had happened and he could go on to his normal life as that lousy college art student. It was so much better that way.

Because right now his tears were traitorously running down his face again.

“Shh. I’m here, I’m here.” Levi pulled him into those awaiting, comforting arms and he rocked them on his heels, as they remained crouched on the ground.

“Levi…Levi…Levi…” Eren repeatedly whispered his name as a mantra, trying to soothe his aching and most likely breaking heart. He didn’t know if anything—or anyone—could actually fix this one, because he knew that this incident was just the beginning of everything. If this had happened when Levi was around, he would never be able to forgive himself. The last thing he wanted was to drag one of the most important people in his life to this dangerous mess he was involved in. It was right there when he made a vow. A vow to protect the people that mattered to him.

And with that promise resounding in his head, he let himself be consumed in the darkness.

 

* * *

 

There were muffled noises.

He felt himself twitch and he realized that a black hole was blocking his eyesight, but by the time he regained his consciousness, he knew that he had to open his eyes to see the light again.

It was hard to peel his eyelids open when they felt like they were super-glued on his skin, and it was damn painful. He had to suppress the shudder that went through his body at the thought of his eyelashes being plucked out one by one because they were stuck on his skin. However, when he finally opened his teal eyes with an excruciating effort, he merely saw the opposite of what he had originally seen: white. He blinked slowly and first managed to recognize those faint noises as actual human voices, and the understanding that he was staring at a white, spotless ceiling came in second.

“Eren?”

It was Levi, and he knew that it was the certain grey-eyed man because the way he had said his name was different from how everyone else had said it. But as much as he loved hearing his name from the older man, his confusion was too strong to be ignored and it very much needed some attention.

“W-Where am I?” He croaked out, disliking that dry feeling on his tongue like he just swallowed a mouthful of cotton balls. _Ew. Gross._ His question was answered when he moved his gaze off the ceiling and to his surroundings. Tubes were linked, like lines impossible to distinguish from one another, between his body and an IV stand. He tried to bend his head down to confirm his suspicion but it was hard when a loopy feeling got the better of him, making his eyes see a tilted world for a moment and scaring the living crap out of him. He should’ve probably taken it easy first. After readjusting his vision though, he looked at what he was wearing and he cringed when he saw that white hospital gown.

Fuck.

This was probably the worse place to be at when his mind was clouded with utter disorientation. He didn’t even see the certain short man next to his bed because his heart was hammering hard in his chest, forgetting that his vitals were in check with the stupid machines connected to him.

“Eren, are you alright?”

He would’ve had enjoyed the sound of his name again because he was not being called a “kid” or a “brat”; a moment like this was very rare. However, it was a hard hurdle to overcome the panic that gripped his chest, making him gasp unevenly and rapidly like he was drowning and he was far below to make it to the surface and get air. He immediately sat up, ignoring the silent protest of his numb limbs, making him wonder for a second of how long had he been knocked out.

“Should I call the nurse or the doctor?”

There was a slight panic in that voice and he finally lifted his gaze from the despicable white hospital sheets to the man standing beside him. Levi was looking at him worriedly; his impassive face was long forgotten as he tried to check for any signs of what was wrong with Eren. The brunet’s heart stopped its erratic beating and started to go back to its normal pace, feeling a bit calm now that he got to see the face of the person he wanted to see the most. It was like Levi had given him the air that he needed, enabling him to breathe again and relief settled in his body.

“You’re here,” he muttered softly and he slowly lifted his hand towards Levi’s that was laid on the sheets next to him. He tried to suppress a look of grimace from surfacing on his face as he caught a glimpse of a tube taped on his arm, yet it still made him falter and the older male had no doubt caught his reaction. He was startled when pale hands reached for his and he was set ablaze with one simple touch; he’d never get tired of these stimulations that were caused by his lover. The warmth in those hands was transferred to his as Levi slowly intertwined their fingers together. The sight was enough for Eren to settle in that bliss of ignorance he was in, completely forgetting his agitation and his worries.

“Are you feeling alright?” the grey-eyed man asked him cautiously. Eren couldn’t blame him for asking that because he had probably looked like a deer caught in headlights the first time he awoke.

“Yeah. My mouth feels really dry, though,” Eren replied to him with a broken voice.

A cup of water was handed to him and he took it gratefully before gulping it down to the last drop. The thirst he had felt was mostly quenched and he was confident that he would be able to talk with less difficulty now. He gave the cup back to Levi who placed it on top of the table some feet away from the hospital bed.

Right. He was in the hospital.

The brunet squeezed his eyes closed for a bit, focusing on the bits of memories coming back to him. He exhaled shakily and snapped his green eyes open when he remembered what took place at the bakery, where he had witnessed a shower of gunshots that should’ve had injured him, and Mike bleeding to death.

“Where’s Mike?” he asked, eyes seeking the door of his room, and he was quite ready to bolt out of there if not for the squeeze that Levi had provided him.

“He’s alright. He lost a lot of blood, but he’s gonna be fine. Erwin is with him right now,” he reassured the brunet.

It made him sigh in relief like a weight was taken away from his shoulders and he could move again. He could still see that crimson liquid behind his eyelids, but he was extremely thankful that the man who saved his life was alive and breathing.

_“Your mom’s death is not an accident, Eren.”_

Those words came back to him; a painful throb on his left temple left him wincing in pain. Levi had seen it and he pulled one hand away from their entangled fingers, using it to caress Eren’s cheek. He unconsciously leaned to that touch, affectionate and comforting, and it prompted him to shove away all his thoughts away. It would remain in his mind no matter what he did, but he would get nowhere worrying about it and finding answers when they could only be heard from his protector. And he was determined to get out whatever he needed to hear from him, and if Mike still wouldn’t budge then he would look for the answers himself.

His gaze landed on Levi who was staring back at him. This precious man that changed his view about love the minute he bumped to him in that amusement park had been one of the greatest blessings he had received in his life. He recalled the gunshots, the wound on Mike’s body, and it made him think that if Levi were the one bleeding his life away, Eren would’ve probably lost it. Mikasa, Armin and Jean had been the few people he trusted and he would be more than ready to shield them away from any bullets, and Levi was not any different. He would’ve given his life for him and it still wouldn’t be enough because he had given him much more. He had given him his trust, his heart, his love—and though, he still hadn’t heard those awaited three words from his mouth, he knew—and yet Eren couldn’t give him all his heart yet. Not when he still feared something.

He feared that he would lose the connection that they built together. He feared that Levi, being the older one between them, would be more likely to be disappointed if Eren made a mistake in their relationship. He feared that the man he cared about would leave him if he realized the flaws he hid behind those silly smiles of his. He feared that if he were to love him more deeply than he already had, then he would become an empty shell once again if he were to lose him. They were holding hands right now, warmth shared between them, but he didn’t know when would this last; it could be the next minute, the next hour, or the next day. And he was terrified of that.

“Stop it,” Levi suddenly spoke, his thin eyebrows meeting together at the center of his forehead.

Eren looked at him confusedly and the grey-eyed man gave out a sigh.

“You look… so far away. I feel like I can’t reach you.” There was a hint of desperation and helplessness in that voice and the green-eyed lad attempted to smile to him.

“Sorry. It’s hard not to space out when I just went through all…that.”

“I know.” The shorter man gave him a sympathetic smile and sat on the chair next to the bed, holding Eren’s hand all the while like he was afraid that he really would lose the young man if he were to take his hand away from him or even his eyes off him.

Eren wondered if Levi was ever gonna ask him about what happened, interrogate him because his boyfriend was without a doubt worried like hell. However, he remained silent and by the brunet’s side. It allowed him to gaze upon those long eyelashes touching his pale cheekbones, those thin lips that perfectly fitted upon his own, those eyes that held that silver molten liquid that never failed to make him feel exhilarated and those jet-black strands that Levi somehow maintained neat and trimmed. Eren recalled that those features were what he saw in the middle of a struggle with his life.

He’d never be able to make it through if he were not able to see that face again, that voice again.

“Levi.”

His voice quivered slightly and before he knew it, he already grasped the older man towards him, closing the distance between them in one pull. He saw Levi’s eyes widened the slightest, clearly surprised at the bold action that Eren was about to take, before his eyelids shut closed. And he felt that warm sensation again.

This time they weren’t under any stars and the situation that they were in right now should be nothing romantic at all. But the moment their lips touched, the spark that they first avoided then embraced together was back, electrifying their nerves and lighting up something inside them that made them push to each other’s heat even more closer. Their lips were firm as they pressed together and Levi moved, urging Eren to do the same. Their kiss became more heated as the older male sighed and the younger took that opportunity to swipe his tongue on his bottom lip before nipping it lightly. A light growl was heard before tongues tangled with each other, exploring the caverns that they hadn’t yet felt before. It was like a fire—blazing, hot, bright—shooting up his nerves and behind his eyelids. Chest was pressed against his, a hand tugged onto his chestnut brown hair and another hand grasped the fabric he was wearing; these stimulations were enough for him to imitate the sigh he had received a moment ago, and it was one of satisfaction. He felt like he was taken up to the heights, breathing in the scent that was so familiar to him. The bed creaked slightly, clothes rustled and noses bumped once or twice and yet none of these bothered them as evident with the little moans that escaped from their lips. Eren knew that he was running out of oxygen when he felt that burning feeling in his lungs and even though every fiber of his seemed to protest, he had to pull away.

His eyes were half-lidded and he stared at Levi whose cheeks were tinted pink, which was a feat, really, and his eyes were dilated to the point that there was only a thin ring of silver around his pupil. The wetness on his lips unconsciously made Eren lick his own, catching the taste of the older man’s—a sweet yet bitter taste, like a hint of coffee. Typical Levi. The thought caused a smile to grace his face and he was aware that there was less than an inch between the two of them; they were practically sharing the same breath. The intimacy that they were engaged in hadn’t ended when their lips weren’t locked on each other anymore; in fact, the proximity that they had right now while observing each other could still send a tingle to their bodies. Eren’s mind was successfully wiped out of any thoughts that he didn’t want to intrude in his time with his lover, and he couldn’t get any happier to disregard them at the moment.

 “Warn me next time, brat,” Levi said breathlessly. It made the young man grin; all his pain was forgotten.

“Then, I’ll kiss you again,” he said cheekily before diving in the second time. And while his lips were upon Levi’s, he felt the older male shake a bit with silent laughter.

It was one moment that Eren wouldn’t trade for anything in the world.

 

* * *

 

Eren woke up and he judged that it was in the middle of the night because the only thing that he could hear was the hum of some machine near him and he could only see a silver of light filtering through the blinds. He blinked the bleariness away and remembered that he was supposed to stay in the hospital for one more night because his doctor doubted his ability to walk straight after fainting unceremoniously like that. It was just a precaution, he said and he denied the brunet’s claim that he was perfectly fine. His doctor was without a doubt a little more than worried about the impact on his mental state than his physical being. So there he was, lying on his back and staring at that white ceiling again, wide awake because he had practically slept the whole afternoon. He was out for more than ten hours after the incident happened and he mused how that seemed to be the first time since he entered college that he was able to get that much sleep.

He recalled the bits of what happened that afternoon, chuckling at the memory. Mikasa and his friends rushed to his room fifteen minutes after he told them about what happened, thanks to Levi who had forced him to call them. It wasn’t an easy task because when Mikasa picked up her phone, she frantically asked him where he was because she had already heard from Ymir about what happened to their poor bakery—that same bakery that gave him a job and a source of living when he was currently being “independent” individual. At the thought of the bakery, he recalled his boss and the fact that he shouldn’t be too far away from his room. He had the resolve to talk to the man about what he revealed to him, and his questions that he pushed at the back of his mind were now flowing like a dam. He needed answers fast.

Like now.

Eren was freed from the lines of tubes that brought upon a wave of hatred in him when he first saw them, and he remembered the reason why. He didn’t like the idea of being in the hospital because there were lives on the verge of falling into that darkness, there were patients crying because of an incurable disease and there those who had simply given up hope after some news being delivered to them. But what made him loathe the place was because it reminded him of that dreamless night where he had woken up completely clueless about everything. That was when he first had his episode—right after he found out that his mom was dead.

He slipped out of the thin blankets swept over him and slowly placed his toes on the cold hard ground. The brunet hesitated a bit. What if Mike was asleep? Wouldn’t his effort become wasted then? But what if he wasn’t ready to hear the truth yet? What if the answer that he was seeking for could potentially end this life that he was currently living? Would he still be the same afterwards? His hesitance made him swallow hard; he couldn’t possibly back out now.

He willed himself to walk to the door of his room and open it quietly so it wouldn’t alert any staff of the hospital. The last thing he wanted was a cheeky nurse who would cause a racket in the middle of the night, reprimanding him about rules and sneaking out. He closed his door just as quietly as he opened it, and he started his search. According to what he heard from Levi earlier, Mike should only be a couple of rooms away from him but Eren didn’t know which way to go. He chose left and headed towards the door that would lead him to his wounded boss.

When he reached the room his hand hovered on the doorknob, and he contemplated whether he was really going to do this or not. He’d wondered where did all the anger and frustration he felt a little more than ten hours ago had gone to because he could really use of those right now. His nerves were wired and after a couple of minutes battling an inner conflict in his mind, he finally closed his eyes and just wished himself luck. The door swung open slowly and he thanked the heavens that the object didn’t creak; he didn’t want the FBI agent pointing a gun to him right now.

The first thing he noticed was the pair of eyes trained on him, and he knew that Mike was probably expecting him. The blonde was sitting up, a blue cast was around his arm and Eren vaguely remembered that he saw one like that just a little over a week ago.

“Eren.”

“Mike,” he called back, clearing his voice when it didn’t sound right to his ears. “Are you alright?”

His boss nodded and let out a smile to him—a smile that he knew he didn’t deserve because he couldn’t repay him enough for protecting him. “I’m fine,” he said.

“Look, I…” Eren trailed off, eyes catching Mike motioning for him to come closer. He did just that and he sat on the chair available next to his hospital bed, breathing unevenly because the atmosphere around them was heavy with tension—a totally different one compared to the one he shared with Levi.

“I know that you’re seeking for answers right now,” the FBI agent told him sympathetically. He continued, “Eren, do you remember what I told you about your mother?”

He let a beat passed before nodding.

“I’m serious when I told you that your life is danger, and I’m seriously not doing a great job if I get injured every time it happens,” he let out a dry laugh, “But I can assure you that you’re not going to be in any danger if I’m right here.”

The young man let that sink in, before he replied carefully, “How long have you been under the cover of a bakery boss?”

“Ah.” Mike fell back on the pillows, trying to get in a comfortable position but the tension on his shoulders hadn’t left yet. “It’s true that I’ve taken up that job.”

“Huh?” Confusion filled the green-eyed lad’s voice. “What do you mean? If you’ve been protecting me then—“

“It’s true that I’ve been keeping you out of any harm but also I’m taking a break from the FBI business for real.”

“But you said…”

“The responsibility of protecting you does not fall under any assignment given to me. I’m doing this out of my own will,” Mike said genuinely.

The response was not what Eren had expected, far from it actually. He had ran over the things that happened to him in his brain and he only grasped the idea that Mike had been there for him as his protector since two years ago when he found him wandering the streets looking for a job. He was the one who took him in and supported his goal, which he was grateful for. He really thought that all of those were just part of his job. But it looked like that it wasn’t the case, after all.

So why?

He wasn’t aware that he had said his thought out loud, and he was a bit startled when Mike had responded to him.

“Because I was there when the car crash happened.”

Green eyes widened upon hearing that statement and his mouth dropped a little. He felt his stomach dropped more, hearting drumming against his chest, when the blonde continued talking.

“It was on an empty intersection at a local town when I drove home after work. I stopped at the red light at the same time I saw a car that was flipped over. But that’s not all that I saw.”

He could feel the prickling of his tears and the lump in his throat grew, making him unable to speak. But he had to. He had to know this. He had to clear all the deception that those five years had blinded him with.

“I saw a man near your mom’s car and I immediately ran after I left my car in the middle of the street. He probably saw me because he started running too, and I was about to chase after him when he tried to get back to a truck on the street but I knew that there’s someone who needed my help more. I found your mom and I called the ambulance and they went to get you and your mom.”

Eren’s mind was like a puzzle now, fitting in pieces that seemed likely to fit with all the others that were already intact. It was giving him a massive headache, yet he managed to say, “Are you saying that someone intentionally crashed his truck to my mom’s to create that accident?” The sound of his questions was incredulous even to his ears, but Mike gave him the confirmation that he needed.

“He was in disguised, Eren. His truck was badly dented on the front and he somehow managed to take all the damage to your mom. He was skilled, like he knew what exactly he was doing. His plate number was faked and I checked it several times, trying to find him because he was our initial suspect. But it’s been years and nothing came up. His truck was crumpled in the junkyard and there are still no leads.”

“Wait…” Eren’s gulped down, mouth opening to gasp some air into his fluctuating lungs. “You…You said that…” He looked at Mike and the blonde’s eyes were a fraction bigger and they were suddenly filled with dread and fear.

“You said ‘they went to get you and your mom.’ Why are you telling me that I was there that night, Mike?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh gosh, I know. Pieces of the past are now coming together but there is one more thread that is missing :O I don't know about 'that' scene but I hope it's not too bad..LOL. Thank you for the kudos and for reading this! See you next week~


	13. To Protect Him

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eren makes a decision about the truth that is revealed to him. Hiding the truth is the only option to protect the one that you love.

**I don’t own SnK or the movie mentioned**

* * *

_"Love is the emblem of eternity; it confounds all notion of time; effaces all memory of a beginning, all fear of an end.”_

_-Madame De Stael_

* * *

**~Chapter Thirteen: To Protect Him~**

 

Green eyes were determined in searching the truth in those brown eyes that were staring right back at him. Eren hardened his resolve more when he saw Mike flinch as he asked that question to him. However, instead of finding a little triumph after he had been suspiciously right about something, he only found dread filling his chest and weighing him down. He suddenly wanted nothing to do with everything now; he wanted to forget what he had heard from the FBI agent, about his mom and her death, because now that his ears had been filled with the truth he had sought just thirty seconds ago, he knew that he was even more least likely to go back to his normal life.

He was no longer Eren Jaeger who had been ignorant about all these appalling facts hidden from him under his nose.

“Eren…” Mike started but the brunet cut him off effectively when his voice rose a bit higher.

“Forget that I asked that,” he told him, sounding a little dead and yet it seemed appropriate because that was what he was exactly feeling at the moment.

Mike was looking at him warily, as if the young man would sprint out of there and start gunning at anyone he deemed suspicious enough to be the suspect. The idea was ridiculous but Eren couldn’t deny that it had passed his mind for a brief second.

“I hope you do nothing stupid. This is exactly what I’m worried about. You’ve been in the dark for so long and I don’t want you to—“

“I’ve been protected by you all these years without even a single clue about what was happening around me. Hadn’t you been injured twice now because of me? Maybe even more than that. Mike,” he narrowed his gaze, “I’m not a fucking _child_. It’s true that I’ve been living in such blissful ignorance but I don’t _want_ to be like that. I’ve always believed that Carla Jaeger, my mother, died because of an accident, and now you’re telling me that someone intentionally did that to her? And you’re expecting me to stay put?!” He knew that he was probably yelling now, a noise that would most likely alert the nurses and rush to this very room he was currently in. He couldn’t afford to waste any more time as he let out what was inside him; chest was heaving slightly and face was red in anger.

“You said that you still haven’t found the suspect; so let me help you.”

Mike’s eyes narrowed on him and he muttered harshly, “There’s no way I’m exposing you to that kind of danger, Jaeger.” The way he said his name sent off warning signals to his head but he didn’t want to back down now. Not now, not ever.

“Then, I’ll work alone,” he challenged, putting intensity into his gaze as if it wasn’t already reflecting much of his anger now.

The agent looked away from him, face was downcast and eyes were on the sheets covering the bottom half of his body. He pinched the bridge of his nose with his good arm, a tube following the motion, in obvious irritation and frustration. Yet, Eren was more than sure about what he said; he would really do the digging alone if it meant that he would be able to catch the criminal that took his mom away from him. If he could just retrieve the hole in his memories, then maybe he would get more clues about what happened. He knew that Mikasa probably knew something about this but he didn’t want to drag her or her family to this mess that could put their lives in danger. No, he would rather be alone on this.

“I’m not letting you deal with this alone,” Mike suddenly said, shaking the brunet out of his train of thoughts.

“Then…” He sounded a bit hopeful; the second he heard the story from Mike, he knew that he was incapable of achieving his objective in a short amount of time without the proper equipment and authority. He’d probably spend half of his life trying to take on a case that hadn’t been deciphered these past five years, but that didn’t kill his determination.

“I’ll let you in to the case. You’re a student; barely aware of the laws and what is necessary to know about the criminal world, so let me guide you. I’ve been told that there’s a probability that some other cases are involved in this one. You’re still under my watch, got it?” There was a pressing need for an immediate response there, and Eren nodded.

“Got it.”

 

* * *

 

Two weeks had passed and everything went back to normal; the bakery was fixed and they could work there again. There were security cameras now, thanks to the FBI fussing over a chance of another incident happening again and they were more than eager to find the culprit who rained bullets down at the place.

And Levi was seething in a different manner.

Eren had been picked up and driven home by his boyfriend and when short man wasn’t available and was tied down on his desk because of the pile that had built up in the last couple of weeks, Petra or anyone in the SOS was in charge. Erwin would sometimes volunteer, even though it had only been twice. And this was one of those times.

“So Eren, is there anything you would like to eat?” the blonde asked him, his intense blue eyes were focused on the road and two hands were carefully placed on the wheel. He looked like a commander of an army or some sort with his uptight expression and all, which seemed reasonable since Erwin was like a guardian of the freaking law or something like that.

“Not really. Just drop me off?” the student said, sounding a bit unsure because turning the man down didn’t seem like a good idea.

“I’ll go to McDonald’s, drive thru,” the agent simply said, despite the brunet’s response. The picture of the FBI dude getting fries and chicken sandwich from a fast food restaurant was amusing. Levi would probably never get near the damn place because it would be “greasy as shit”. The intrusion of the certain man made Eren smile sadly. They hadn’t talked about the incident in the past couple of weeks and Levi wasn’t forcing him to spill any information to him. He loved that his lover was giving him privacy, but he also felt guilty because stress had probably built in that short stature of his, especially since Levi was the type to put an emotional barrier when it was necessary.

“Is there anything that you could possibly remember from the incident?” Erwin voiced out his question out of the blue. The gravity of all this was lessened when he snatched some fries balanced on the center console as he led them out of the place.

“I thought you’re not going to interrogate me,” Eren said cautiously, narrowing his eyes slightly. The sight of the blonde man having some fries stick out his mouth was something he would laugh at, yet he didn’t have the humor to do that. Erwin had been keeping tabs on him through Levi or Mike (he had a nagging feeling), but the agent hadn’t talked to him directly ever since that one time at the hospital when the brunet got discharged. He had asked him about what he remembered about the incident and he only told him what he saw, and the intimidating man hadn’t masked the doubt on his face. He remembered that Mike and Erwin had worked together in the past, and the reason that the latter was trying to get information out of him was most likely because he knew something about _that_ case. However, Eren didn’t want to take any chances; he promised Mike that he would keep his mouth shut about that matter no matter what happened.

“Did you talk to Levi?”

His response was quick. “No.”

Erwin looked at him hard, blue eyes sent a dangerous shudder in him and that thinned line on his lips meant that the agent wasn’t the one to beat around the bush. “Why?”

He didn’t answer. Truthfully, the brunet had been planning that day to confess to his lover about what happened, but he promised to himself that he would leave out that detail involving his mom’s death. It wasn’t something that he could openly talk about with Levi, not when his life could be in danger if that information got through him. The last thing that Eren wanted was for that to happen, and he would do everything in his power to prevent that from happening—even if it meant hiding everything from his lover.

Even if he lost Levi’s trust.

He’d rather see the one he loved living well than see a corpse of the once warm body that he found comfort in.

“I know.”

Those words screeched his thoughts to a halt, making him turn sharply to the man who appeared to be more than composed as ever. That authoritative aura of his would possibly send anyone away with their tail in-between their legs, and Eren had that inkling that he would too. Erwin wasn’t the type of person to play around, he knew that from the moment he met him in Levi’s office and right now, the blonde could directly pull the truth out of Eren’s tongue without any effort. The young man always forgot that the agent could probably read him better than Levi, and that thought irked him and sent fear right through him.

_He knew. He said he knew._

“You’re scared.”

He breathed out a huff of air before replying, “Why do you say that?”

“Because you don’t want to involve Levi. Because you know that revealing this to him would put his life in danger,” Erwin said with such certainty than Eren could ever manage to say in his life.

“What do you know?”

To a stranger, the two of them were probably exchanging a bag of gibberish or riddles that were too difficult to decipher, but the two men knew exactly what was in their minds.

“I know about your mother’s case. I helped Mike track down the criminal five years ago and we didn’t get desirable results.”

Of course, he did. He recalled Levi recognizing his boss the minute they saw each other at the bakery and the grey-eyed mad suspiciously said that he saw Mike with Erwin years ago. He was probably Mike’s partner before he decided to settle down as a baker and take up the responsibility of protecting him.

“Are you gonna tell Levi?”

“Do you want me to?”

He paused; part of him wanted to reveal everything to Levi, assure him that everything was perfectly under his control, yet a bigger part of him knew that the lawyer would absolutely do nothing like sit down and watch Eren do something dangerous _. Oh, no._ Levi would be even more protective and he’d probably jail the artist inside his house, holding a house patrol every night. That was an exaggeration of course ( _or is it?_ ), but something similar could happen. He wondered how that night under a starry night with his lover could turn into a night of terror and a shower of gunshots with Mike’s stomach sporting a bullet wound. Something worse could happen, and he’d rather not let Levi witness it.

“No.”

“Then, I won’t. Just let me know when you find something,” Erwin told him as he halted his car on the curb right in front of his apartment complex. He grimaced when an image of cops surrounding this shelter of his had come into his mind. He didn’t want any more disturbances in his life, yet the underlying tone in what Erwin told him had sent the unspoken meaning behind all this.

It wasn’t the end. It was merely the beginning.

And he begrudgingly thanked the man before he removed his seatbelt and walked into his sanctuary.

 

* * *

 

Two nights later, Eren’s phone vibrated loudly on his center table. He slid his finger on the screen and pressed the device on his ear. He didn’t expect that familiar voice to speak on the other line.

“ _Oi, brat. Are you doing something?_ ”

A warm feeling spread to his chest and he didn’t attempt to suppress the smile that formed in his lips.

“No. I’m just…doing a project.”

He was actually waiting for Mike to call him, because the investigator told him that he would give him a brief summary about the cases that could be potentially involved in his mom’s car crash. He really didn’t know how could some other incidents be connected to his mom’s death, but he wasn’t going to take anything for granted. A simple hint could be a big piece in the missing puzzle, and he wouldn’t pass up the chance to gather more evidence.

But there was that nagging feeling that he was missing something big himself.

“ _I’m coming to pick you up._ ” That statement wasn’t something to be argued with, and he knew Levi enough that he meant he was already driving to Eren’s place and could be five to ten minutes away.

The green-eyed young man suddenly felt panic rise up to his throat and he hesitated. He didn’t want to turn his boyfriend down but he also needed to talk to Mike about that important matter.

“Where are we going?” he asked instead, masking his nervousness.

“ _My house._ ”

“YOUR house?” He realized that his voice rose a bit higher, clearly surprised.

“ _What? You don’t want to?_ ”

“No, no. Of course, I want to!” he immediately replied. _Oh, shit._

“ _Good. Wait for me_.”

And the line went dead with a soft click. Eren hastily stood up from his couch, almost knocking the coffee cup down when he slammed his knee on the table. He yelped in pain and crouched down, massaging his knee that would probably turn bluish-black tomorrow. He didn’t linger to think about what could mark his battered skin and he straightened up and limped down to his room to change his clothes. He was wearing cotton pajamas and a plain white V-neck shirt. He decided to keep the shirt and replaced his bottom pants with some clean blue jeans. Levi wouldn’t appreciate him wearing something that he himself didn’t know if it had already gone through the washing machine.

And true to his word, Levi pressed the doorbell that echoed in his noiseless apartment minutes later. Eren practically flew down the entryway and opened the door with more force than necessary that could’ve had severed the knob from the rest of the object. His eagerness had most likely shown on his face because the smirk that graced upon his lover’s lips told him that he was definitely amused.

“Levi,” he breathed out.

“Yo, brat.”

He was glad that Levi’s voice was light. The atmosphere around them the past week had been severely tense; Levi had became awfully careful around Eren like he was fragile china, which the brunet hated so he confronted him about it. Their little spat led to a make-up kiss—or more like a make-out session—and they both returned to their normalcy. However, the green-eyed lad knew that nothing was completely normal in his life anymore the day he agreed to be let into this FBI business. He could only imagine Levi flipping his shit out once he found out, but Eren would rather seal his lips than let him know about it.

As painful as it was, he wouldn’t put Levi in any danger.

“You look constipated,” the shorter man remarked, an eyebrow raised. Eren realized that he had been spacing out and was probably putting a face that displayed his emotions about his thoughts. His jaw snapped shut; he really needed to be more careful around Levi. He kept forgetting that he was like an open book to him.

“Uh, let’s go?” he offered, itching to be out of the empty apartment and to distract himself with something less dreadful.

“Did you miss me that much?” There was a teasing edge in Levi’s tone and before Eren could blush shyly, the raven’s hand shot up and grabbed his to drag him out of his apartment once he switched off the lights. At least, he could conserve energy and still save some money.

“What’s with the sudden plan?” Eren asked as he got into the silver car. The sight of the vehicle had become even more familiar to him the past couple of weeks.

“It’s not sudden. We planned this before,” Levi reminded him. The younger recalled that; his mind coming back to the incident at the bakery because that was where Levi was supposed to pick him up to go to his house. He felt a bit regretful that an expected wonderful night could turn dark and sour in just one moment.

The lawyer drove on the almost empty streets, and Eren looked at the dull blinking lights that told him it was 11:30 PM already. Levi didn’t usually get off his work that late and he wondered what could’ve had held him up. The thought of him finding out everything that Eren had been trying to hide from him made his heart rattle in its ribcage, and he had to repeat a mantra in his head that Mike would never let that happen. Neither of them wanted anyone to get involved, unless it was a trusted professional person who knew everything around the criminal world—namely Erwin Smith.

They arrived to this two-story white house after a gate automatically opened for Levi, which was Eren’s first clue that his lover could possibly be more loaded than he had imagined him to be. When they were parked in the garage, the brunet let himself out of the car, followed by the engine that stopped its hum after the driver turned it off. The older male followed suit and the brunet could only awkwardly stand there because he didn’t know where to go. His teal eyes caught a sight of bike—a goddamned shiny black bike—and his voice was caught in his throat when he asked Levi a question.

“You have a motorcycle?” he squawked.

He received a sexy smirk in return as the grey-eyed man replied, “Yes. I’m pretty sure it’s not just displayed there like a freaking trophy, though it could be one.”

He let out a hesitant chuckle then scratched his head bashfully. The next thing he knew he was being pulled out of the garage and being led to the front door of his lover’s house. And he might have had noted how those door stood majestically tall with its mahogany piece. Yep, Levi was definitely rich like hell. The lawyer opened his door with a long key; the sight of it reminded him of the one that he had pressed up against his chest. He’d have to think about that later. As soon as he stepped a foot on the threshold, his breath hitched.

Oh, how meticulously _spotless_ it was.

The first thing that he noticed was the giant spiral staircase a few feet away from the foyer. There was a step in front of him, the real floor was alleviated, and he noticed that there was something Eastern about this. There was a pair of shoes and then two pairs of house slippers on the shiny black-and-white tiled floor, and he suspected that they were there to ensure that his house would remain clean. He followed Levi’s example when he took off his black combat boots, clumsily leaning on the wall as he removed his own white sneakers.

He stepped onto the cream carpeted floor and walked behind his lover as they reached a part of his house—the living room. A _bigass_ living room. There were expensive-looking couches, one was a black L-shaped one and a couple of reclining chairs on either side of the big one, and then there was that enormous TV occupying the wall. A bunch of papers and a laptop were placed on the long, glass center table and it made Eren wonder how many nights had Levi spent in this room, falling asleep or taking a dose of his caffeine as he typed the night away. The ceiling was high; the exterior appearance of the house was definitely not living up to its interior because this was no ordinary two-story house. It was a freaking _mansion_. He could see the railings of the staircase from where he was and he wondered if Levi’s room was on the second floor.

“My apartment could fit in your living room,” he dumbly uttered. His eyes caught the stools at an area, and he gulped when he walked a bit closer. He let his jaw hang open when he saw a mini bar and the dining area attached to it. A very clean kitchen and a small glass table of four were separated by an island with a bowl of different rounded fruits placed on top of it. All of the appliances surrounding him, without a doubt, could cost more than a year of his monthly down payment in his apartment, and the thought of that made him feel a bit embarrassed. Levi hadn’t really reacted much when he saw his puny place months ago, and he mused at the memory of the raven making a fuss about _his food._

“Done admiring?” Levi asked, snapping him out of his trance. Eren turned around and waved his hand around him, unable to speak properly. The short man shrugged and said, “My parents contributed to the place.” It made the younger man remember about the amount of zeros on his own parents’ savings; he could probably buy a decent house, probably (a lot) smaller than this place, but it could get him out of that stinking building he was currently living at. Only if he didn’t feel hesitant about using money that didn’t come out from his own pocket.

“Do you wanna watch movies?”

Eren nodded, smiling slightly at him, and he let Levi pull his wrist towards the living room. They settled on the big sofa, where Eren felt that comfortable soft cushion on his arse, and Levi grabbed the remote to turn on the TV. It made the younger wonder how did the grey-eyed man prepare everything in the period of time Eren was distracted, because the stacks of paper were arranged on one side of the table and a big bag of chips with cheese and jalapeno dip were placed on another side.

“Wow.”

“You don’t have classes tomorrow, right?”

“No?” he responded unsurely.

“Good,” Levi simply muttered. Before he could ask why, the familiar sound of the opening epicness reverberated in the room.

“You’re kidding,” he uttered incredulously, looking at Levi who leaned forward to the table to open the glass jar of the drip and poured it on a small plate. He helped by ripping the bag of chips open, careful about the crumbs because his short-stack could be a little anal about cleanliness and whatnot. Judging by what they were gonna watch, he knew that their junk food wouldn’t last the first hour.

“Nope.”

“ _Harry Potter_ marathon?”

“Yup.”

“Is there any ice cream?” Eren asked, even though he already knew that Levi probably had almost everything in that big fridge of his.

“You’re not eating one here,” Levi warned him with a small glare to emphasize his point, but the brunet was already immune to it. He simply leaned back and placed the small plate of dip and the bowl of chips on the sofa between the two of them to share. And as much as Levi hated the idea about spilling food on his furniture, Eren knew that his boyfriend wouldn’t be able to complain about it as he shifted comfortably on the couch, bending his legs and feet dangling, and rested his head against his lover’s. Levi also sat up in his comfortable position and focused on the movie, but not before one warning to Eren.

“Spill any dip and I’ll make you lick it.”

Eren was too light-hearted to take the threat seriously so he merely chuckled and placed a soft kiss on Levi’s temple.

“Only for you.”

Needless to say, the rose-tinted cheeks were enough to ignore that light jab on his ribs.

Oh, this night was going to be fun.

 

* * *

 

Eren was grateful for the afternoon nap that he took yesterday, because when the credits of _Prisoner of Azkaban_ rolled down, it was already seven o’clock in the morning and the sun was shining through the glass panes. Oh yeah, Levi had these gigantic glass windows at the back of his house, covering the living room and the dining room area effectively. He had noticed the sun beginning to rise a little less than two hours ago, and it reminded him that summer was quickly approaching and that his classes would end. He would then have the entire three months before he decided to take another class in college, which he was unsure of now because he was suddenly interested about a whole different field than art.

“Let’s take a break,” Levi said before he stopped the movie, voice sending a little vibration to Eren. Somewhere along the long night, they both ended up lying on their sides with Levi tucked into Eren’s chest, sometimes his black strands would tickle his chin, and the latter had his one arm hanging idly by the older male’s hip while the other was splayed above Levi’s head where he rested his cheek against on. He would’ve had preferred to stay in their position because it was damn cozy, but his freaking stomach took that opportunity to let out a low growl.

The lawyer let out a deep chuckle that successfully sent a shiver down the brunet’s spine. He’d rather not pop something up early in the morning, but the way they were pressed close together was definitely not helping him calm the heat that was threatening to spread to his body. He just buried his face on that silky black mane, hiding his burning face. It proved to be a bad idea because his nose caught that familiar scent of shampoo and—just _Levi_. It was damn frustrating.

“Let me cook breakfast for us,” his lover told him, his laughter ceased and he was already moving.

When that warmth left him, Eren unintentionally let out a small whine, which earned an amused look from Levi.

“What? Don’t tell me you’re popping a boner early in the morning.”

Wow, way to be blunt.

The deeper shade of red on his face further became worse and he could practically imagine himself steaming as that smug expression on Levi just became more conceited by the passing second. He managed to grab a small pillow, which somehow manifested during their movie marathon, and threw it to Levi who caught it with no effort.

“You’re an ass,” he grumbled, rolling on his stomach and planting his face on the soft sofa.

“Oh, you know you love it,” Levi remarked teasingly. The young man felt a smack on _those_ cheeks, which caused him to yelp loudly in surprise. Before he could get back at him, Levi had already made his way to the kitchen.

_Well, two can play that game._

He followed him to that pristine kitchen where the raven had turned up the stove in low heat and placed the skillet on it. Eren leaned onto the kitchen island, propping his elbow and resting his chin on his palm. He watched as his boyfriend opened the refrigerator and got some eggs, opened up the cabinets to get a bowl and a whisker, and then he turned to the brunet who was merely staring at him.

“Aren’t you even gonna help me, brat?” That question made him straightened up and he glanced curiously around the kitchen. Uh, did Levi forget that he couldn’t cook for shit?

The grey-eyed man seemed to get the gist of the situation and he told him, “I’m not letting you near the goddamned stove, kid. You can get the plates and set them on the table.”

Eren asked where could he retrieve those items and Levi pointed to another cabinet and he smiled at how the ceramic plates were arranged carefully. His boyfriend really _did_ have OCD. Now grinning and warmth filling his chest, he grabbed two dishes and placed them softly on the glass table before he went back to grab some cups.

_Is this what it feels like to be_ at home _with someone?_

“Do you want coffee?” he asked Levi.

“Yeah, it will help to keep me awake. Though, I prefer tea,” the raven answered back. He could hear the sizzle, and the aroma of the incoming mouth-watering food made his stomach protest a little more than necessary. He blushed in embarrassment and his suspicion that Levi had heard it was confirmed when soft laughter erupted from his direction. He tried to ignore it and focused on the coffeemaker right in front of him. He was relieved that he could at least use the appliances around here because fucking them up was not at option; they were, without a doubt, set at an eye-bulging price and he wouldn’t be able to afford a replacement. Not that Levi would let him do that, oh, no.

When Eren finished setting up the machine, he went around Levi and a thought popped out in his mind. He looked at that gorgeous ass before he took the perfect opportunity to smack it as he passed by. The strangled-like noise that indicated he was surprised had sent Eren doubling in laughter.

“Fucking brat,” Levi all but growled to him.

“Payback,” he wheezed out between his breaths.

 

* * *

 

After a little more jabs and verbal smack down, the couple settled on the chairs adjacent to each other and ate peacefully, enjoying the view of the sun illuminating the area through the windows. The Eren admired the way it lit up the big house, touching the objects that he didn’t see under the dimmed lights last night. He gazed at the little fountain next to the window; the water was spraying from a mouth of a dolphin, and a little rainbow appeared, successfully catching all his attention. Unbeknownst to him, Levi was staring at him, astonished as to how those Caribbean green eyes shine with fascination, with a little smile on his face that he hid behind his coffee cup.

“How long has it been since you had any visitors here?” Eren asked, suddenly curious as to how his lover could maintain this great place speckless and arranged accordingly.

“I don’t know. I usually come over to their house when I’m invited.”

“Hanji and Erwin?”

“Yeah.” Levi rolled his eyes and continued, “It’s hard not to say yes to that fucking glasses when she won’t let go of my leg at the law firm.”

Eren laughed. He could imagine the certain redhead clinging on Levi as he attempted to put her claws away from him, earning strange looks from the people at his workplace. He briefly admired Hanji for sticking to Levi because the man was a tough nut to crack. Well, maybe not to him. But the others most likely had a hard time making the lawyer smile, something that Eren saw every time they were together. Hanji and Levi’s relationship was like his friendship with Armin and Mikasa, and it was undoubtedly a precious one. He was glad that someone was there for Levi during those years he wasn’t there by his side.

“It’s good to have friends, you know.”

“Mhm.”

“Levi,” he called out, placing his eyes on those grey ones that looked so unusually carefree, like he wasn’t stressed and he wasn’t carrying anything on his shoulders. The image made Eren smile softly.

_I love you._

He couldn’t vocalized the words, but he knew that he got it across to the raven because Levi smiled back to him with all the gentleness and the love he could muster with that one smile. The others would surely kill to see that smile.

_I love you, too._

Eren could only hope that he interpreted that right, but even if he were mistaken, he still wouldn’t take his own feelings back. It was that moment when the house felt warm— _felt like home_ —to him that he realized that he was more than ready to give all his heart to Levi. It made Eren lean down to the shorter man and capture those lips that met him halfway.

He’d do anything to protect that smile.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love these dorks :3 Thanks for the kudos and for the amusing comments :) Never failed to make me smile hahaha


	14. Clues and Premonition

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eren and Levi have a heart-to-heart talk. Eren gets a call from Mikasa and Mike. Mike and Erwin inform Eren of something. An unexpected occurrence happens in the end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OMG a million of apologies to all of you waiting yesterday. It's my spring break and I lost track of the days. *bows profusely*

**I don’t own SnK**

* * *

 

_“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”  
-Bob Marley_

* * *

**~Chapter Fourteen: Clues and Premonition~**

There was that incessant, annoying sound. It tore the silence down and replaced it with a familiar ringtone that bounced onto Eren’s eardrums.

The brunet knew that he had to tear his eyelids open, no matter how glued they seemed to be on the skin above his cheekbones. He let out a grunt of irritation when the song from his phone didn’t get terminated after the first call. Whoever was calling him should have a good reason in stopping him from getting at least four hours of sleep after a freaking _Harry Potter_ marathon, because he wasn’t in the mood for any sales talk and he might just chuck his phone across the room.

The thought of where he was prompted him to crack one eye open and the sight that greeted him didn’t disappoint. Those black strands sticking out of a sorry excuse of a birds’ nest touched Eren’s cheeks, and the warmth coming off the lean frame pressed upon his own body had seeped through him. He wondered if it was possibly to stay like that forever, with Levi allowing him to _cuddle_ with him. It was a dream came true; and the urge to take a picture of the face that was turned away from him had light up some buzz of excitement in him. His one opened eye found his phone on the center table, and he internally groaned.

The annoying caller was still calling!

He sighed silently, not daring to wake up the short stature of bad temper and possible strings of curses lying next to him. He tried his best to maneuver around his lover on the couch, carefully lifting his arm up so he wouldn’t cause too much rustling or any creaking that could potentially deliver him a blow to his nose. He wondered if his boyfriend had some issues about being woken up; Eren knew what it felt like to suddenly get interrupted in his sleep and the memory of almost elbowing Armin in the nose made him grimace. When he blindly touched the glass table, muscles were straining and would’ve probably result to some cramps if he weren’t fit, and he merely grasped the cool feeling of the surface. When he finally managed to fetch his device off the table, he slowly took back his arm and held his phone near his face, afraid that holding it up high would lead to a bloody nose if he were to drop it on his face.

_2 missed calls. Cap. Mike_

Green eyes widened as realization sunk in. He had totally forgotten to call Mike last night! He was waiting for his boss’s call, especially since it was about _the_ case, but Levi had perfectly distracted him for more than twelve hours, effectively making him forget about Mike. He swallowed the nervous lump in his throat, and his eyes darted toward the older man curled against him. Crap. This was going to be harder than he thought.

As much as he hated texting, he knew that it was the only way to get a message to the blonde FBI agent. And he did just that.

Apparently, sending a text message required too much movement than necessary on Eren’s part, because the next thing that greeted him was that pair of gorgeous silver pools staring at him with evidence of bleariness. His mouth parted slightly in surprise, while his hand instantly hid his phone behind his back. He was suddenly glad that they were lying on their sides and that Levi was turned away from him. The last thing he wanted today was for his boyfriend to find out everything that he wasn’t meant to find out at all. No, Eren would never allow that.

“Good morning?” he said, the lack of certainty was thick in his voice.

Levi spared one glance to the windows and the lack of sunlight made him raise an elegant eyebrow. “It’s actually supposed to be goodnight but we already slept the whole afternoon, so…”

The younger chuckled nervously; his nerves were still a bit rattled after his boyfriend almost caught him with his phone. However, he also knew that Levi was too good at reading his expressions and the slight indication of that was shown by how his eyes narrowed on him.

“What were you doing?”

Eren fidgeted, thinking that maybe if he were to scoot closer to the back of the couch, then his phone would be well hidden. But being away from that comfortable bubble with Levi was not an option for him right now, not when he was practically lying to him.

“You weren’t jerking off are you?” His voice was monotone but the brunet knew that there was a hint of teasing in the raven’s tone, which caused him to blush slightly. Talking about this topic with Levi wasn’t exactly appropriate, especially when he _almost_ had a morning wood earlier. He was surprised though when the grey-eyed man turned to him, and now they were chest-to-chest and face-to-face. Eren resisted the urge to gulp; that would show how wrecked his nerves were and Levi would be able to pull the truth from him.

“I was _not_. I just woke up.”

This perfect man just rolled his eyes and Eren’s heart hammered against his chest when Levi put his head on the crook of his neck. He felt the older man yawned then his hand found the younger’s nape, fingers were rubbing slow, gentle circles around the skin, making Eren shiver involuntarily.

“Are you alright?” Levi abruptly asked, which also cleared out the foggy thoughts out of the brunet’s mind.

“Yeah, why?” he asked. He knew where this was going, and he would be lying if he said that he was completely prepared for this conversation because he obviously was not. He had a talk with Erwin just a few days ago but that night, he wasn’t able to talk to Levi because the lawyer had work to do and Eren got a call from Mr. Pixis regarding his next art piece. The next day, his nerves completely betrayed him and the words from his mouth magically disappeared when he saw his boyfriend sitting on one of the tables at their usual café. The minute they parted, he had to put his will on the line because the desire to bash his head on the wall was too great. He couldn’t believe that he would chicken out like that. And now that Levi was initiating this discussion about what occurred two weeks ago, Eren knew that he had no way out.

He didn’t want to keep hiding things from him anymore.

“Nothing,” the older male said. His usual stoic façade was already put up and the slight movement that rose from him gave Eren the inkling that he had to pull his lover towards him. Before Levi could turn around, he grasped his arms and closed the distance between them. Eren brushed his lips on Levi’s with all the gentleness that he could muster, before he pulled away to gaze at the man who captured his heart in one go.

“I’m sorry if I’d been a wuss. But you can ask me anything now,” he told him sincerely. Levi’s eyes widened before they softened to a great extent, something that Eren knew was only reserved for him and him alone.

“Were you scared?” Levi whispered softly, his grey orbs were seeking those Caribbean ones for any signs that could contradict his words.

“Yes,” he answered honestly. He still could hear the gunshots and the glass shattering next to him even if many days had already passed. He still could feel himself shaking, curling into a ball of anxiety and fear. He still could see the red on his hands and the warm liquid oozing out of Mike’s, threatening to drain away his life. He still could remember the words that his boss revealed about his mother’s death, and they remained tattooed in his mind, like a permanent reminder that he couldn’t go back to the way his life originally was.

But Levi made it feel like he was allowed to be the Eren Jaeger before that incident. Completely ignorant. Completely safe. Completely careless. Just… _him._

“But in the midst of that chaos, there was only one person in my mind,” he added breathlessly. He took in the way Levi’s eyebrows scrunched a bit, those molten irises never leaving his, and how his lips were slightly parted. The same face had popped in his mind when he was teetering on the edge where his life could be taken away from him.

“It was you.”

“Eren…” The way he said his name made the brunet smile softly. Levi leaned his face on his chest, listening to that calm rhythm of his lover’s heart and soothing him off his worries and the unnecessary anxieties that he had for the younger. Eren then began telling his story about what happened that night, holding his tongue before it slipped the detail about what he had been keeping from Levi. That was one thing he wouldn’t allow his ears to hear, and as much as he knew that Levi wouldn’t appreciate being oblivious, he knew that it was the only way to keep him from any harm that was bound to come to Eren one day. Which was probably sooner than he’d realized.

“I’m sorry. I wasn’t there for you. I called you, and then you sounded too panicked and I… I was scared,” Levi confessed, swallowing audibly at the last part. It made the green-eyed lad pull away from him so he could caress that pale cheek, smooth and warm, just as he had expected it to be.

“I’d rather not see you there with me where you could be in danger,” he said. He knew that he was on the verge of saying something to him regarding the other matter, but he didn’t let it escape from his lips. He just wanted to let Levi know of his reasons. He just wanted him to know how much he actually meant to him.

Levi glared at him. “I’d rather be the one in your position than let you experience something like that. I’m pretty sure that I’m stronger than you think I am, you know.”

The statement made his teal eyes widened a fraction, even though he knew that the raven would definitely say something like that. It was the reason behind his hiding a secret from Levi—he knew that he wouldn’t sit back and let Eren stake his life in any situation. Telling Levi was like asking for him to bind his wrists to the couch or something, just so he wouldn’t be able to set a foot away from him. It was his boyfriend’s nature that made him shut his mouth.

Because he knew that he meant so much to Levi and that he _would_ take the fall for Eren.

“But I don’t want to see you hurt.”

“Feelings mutual, brat. I’ve been exposed to many horrid things but you have not, and I’d rather not let you experience something like that. Sometimes, it’s better to remain like an innocent kid you are than face this harsh reality.”

“I’m not a kid.” He didn’t want to add another retort to that. He couldn’t possibly tell Levi that _actually I’ve been working with Mike and he’s letting me into this whole FBI business thing for my mother’s case_ because he knew that the first thing that the grey-eyed man would do was punch Mike in the face.

Eren never thought about the real reasons behind his impulsive actions, but he felt like it was necessary for him, as his mom’s son, to find the real reason behind her death. For five years he’d been unnaturally agitated thinking about the night he woke up in the hospital with no recollection of how he’d gotten there; he only remembered Mikasa and her family rushing to him. Then, he remembered how they delivered that gut-punching news to him. Mike had also slipped out that one time at the hospital, saying something about the paramedics getting _him_ and his mom out of the car. He wasn’t a genius, but the information that was piling up in the barracks of his brain was enough to signal him that there was something big— _a hole_ —that he was clearly missing. And that if he didn’t get to figure that out soon, then he would be the one falling into this dreadful, unknown abyss.

“What are you thinking about?” Levi asked, curiosity in his voice. Eren noticed that the older man didn’t bother masking his emotions around him anymore, most of the time anyways. He learned how the sides of Levi’s eyes crinkled ever so slightly he could barely see it, whenever he smiled at him. He learned how his eyes reflected most of his feelings—his apprehension, his happiness, his sadness, his fear—and sometimes his lips would quirk downward if he wasn’t pleased about something. This was probably one of those times, because a scowl was threatening to be presented to Eren.

“I wouldn’t be able to live my life if you were the one bleeding his life away, Levi.” The words had already came out of his mouth before he could even stop it, and by how the older’s eyes got bigger, he knew that Levi hadn’t also expected him to say that.

“What are you talking about, brat?” he asked, concern conspicuously displayed on his face. Eren tugged his shirt, pulling himself closer to the small frame of the raven, successfully squashing both of them together like a sandwich. Yet, it never felt like it was enough.

“Levi…”

“Don’t fucking say things like that. I’m not going anywhere, Eren. I’m not going to be apart from you.”

His breath hitched in his throat and he had to force down the urge to let out some tears, because _goddamn it_ , Levi just had to say the things that he wanted to hear the most. He wrapped his arms around his shoulders, hiding away the embarrassing almost-crying expression that was probably plastered on his face.

“Thank you, Levi. Thank you,” he repeatedly muttered on his soft jet-black hair.

The tightening hold around his waist was the only response he got, but it was more than enough.

Levi was more than enough.

He was perfect for him.

 

* * *

 

“Mikasa, I’m telling you that I’m fine. There’s no need for me to move into your house again.”

That was probably the tenth time he had said that to the other person on the phone. Eren was growing a bit frustrated because his best friend had been trying to convince him with all she had that the young man really, _really_ need to be protected at all times, and the only way for that to happen was for the brunet to live with Mikasa’s family for the second time.

It wasn’t like a really bad idea, but the thing was, Eren’s patience was about to snap because there were many people out there who had resorted to babying him. It took one heated argument with Levi before he had stopped treating him like fragile china, but Mikasa had been the only adamant one. He should’ve known. The woman would probably advice him to keep his own gun next. It shouldn’t be a surprise.

_“It’s just for your safety, Eren,”_ Mikasa pleaded on the other side of the call. He resisted rolling his eyes; after all, she was just worried (extremely at that) for him.

“Levi already got that covered.” And he hadn’t been lying.

It had been a week since his sleepover with Levi and he still remembered how they went back to scavenge more movies to watch after dinner. They both had fallen asleep halfway the second movie they put on, and he immediately regretted letting the both of them sleep on the couch because their bodies felt like they were soaked with cement. That, and he regretted not being able to sleep on a real bed. Specifically, on Levi’s bed—

“He picks me up and drops me off whenever he can,” he explained to her, effectively cutting off the direction where his inappropriate thoughts were going.

Yes, Levi was really being protective in his own means without making Eren feel like he was being smothered by a pillow, and he really appreciated that. He also invited him to his house almost everyday and the student was more than happy to accept the invitation. Who in their right mind would pass up the opportunity to spend their time with their hot boyfriend anyway?

_“That’s good. But my offer still stands,”_ she insisted.

He gave out a sigh and chuckled slightly, “Yes, _mom_.”

He could already imagine Mikasa scrunching her nose in distaste at what he had called her before he heard her reply _“I don’t remember giving a birth to a stubborn son like you.”_

“Yeah, yeah. Don’t you have a class?” he asked her.

_“Yep, but before I go, let me ask you this.”_

“Mhm?”

_“You’re not hiding something from me, Eren, right?”_ Mikasa asked him. There was an underlying tone behind that vague question, but the artist had a feeling that there was something into it. It made his chest squeeze in a painful manner, hoping that his childhood friend had nothing to do with what he was trying to do and that she wouldn’t get involved—he just needed to lie again.

“What are you talking about? If you’re talking about that one failing class I have, don’t worry about it. I’ll study for the finals,” he told her. He astonished himself when he heard how leveled his voice was, because once upon a time, not one lie had passed Mikasa undetected. Eren wasn’t exactly the right person to be given the Best Liar Award.

There was a sigh before she replied to him in a defeated tone, which quickly sent a pang of guilt to his heart because he knew what it was like to be in position of someone who was unaware of important things. He didn’t want any of his friends to experience the shock and the anger that seeped through his veins when he found out the truth—but it was completely unavoidable. He’d lose their trust, he knew that from hundreds miles away, but it was better that way.

_“Just…be careful. I gotta go. Annie is giving me a ride to school. I’m also gonna ask her about her date with Armin.”_

“Yeah. Go do that. I also have to talk to Armin about it later.” He smiled, his thoughts finally changing from its unwanted course at the thought of his blonde friend who finally gathered his guts to ask the girl he liked to a date. It made him recall that day he spent with Levi at the beach under the starry night, making his smile grow bigger.

He felt some vibration in his phone and he pulled it away from his ear. The name of the caller cut off whatever blissful thoughts he had, like it just pulled away the rugged carpet from underneath him.

_“Eren. I’ll talk to you later. Be safe.”_ He heard her faint voice before he put his device on his ear again.

“Mhm. Be safe, too.”

He ended that call before he picked up the other one that intruded into his conversation. His veins were quickly turning into ice, making him feel rigid cold and his hands tremble the slightest.

“Mike.”

_“Hey, Eren. Remember the cases that I’ve mentioned to you last week? You have to come down here to my workplace to review them. They’re certified documents. No one will block you when you come in here; Erwin will be there.”_

“O-Okay. I’ll be there in a bit.”

_“Do you want Erwin to pick you up?”_

Did he want to see that intimidating man again? He’d rather not. That would be like pouring more ice-cold water on him, and he’d rather thaw whatever it was in his veins first.

“No, it’s fine. I’ll take the train. I’ll be careful.” He quickly added the last line, knowing that the agent would ask that from him anyway. He had been everyone’s concern and he really hated the feeling that he was too vulnerable.

_“Okay. See you.”_

There was a soft click before the line went dead. Eren exhaled out the breath that he was holding, unaware that he was actually that tense. He knew that this whole matter was dangerous, that his life could potentially—if not already—be in danger. He could the one who would end up with a bullet-hole on his torso the next time he encountered this group. Yes, he suspected them to be a big group because no single person could pull that shower of gunshots unless they spent their time planting some automatic rifle machines.

His mom’s death had been made as an accident and the traces of the real cause were erased like it didn’t exist in the first place. He believed the cops when they told him that the one who caused the car crash had probably ran away in order to protect himself, but now Eren knew that it wasn’t the case at all.

That accident was a _murder_.

Who could possibly have a grudge to his mom when she had been nothing but a very caring and loving mother? Who could possibly crash their car like that, knowing that she had family to come back to? Who could possibly that inhumane to leave her to die like that?

_Who was it?_

What was their motive?

There were so many questions swirling his head and yet there was not even a single answer to put them in place. He could think there for all he wanted, but he would never be able to solve this mystery. He wished that there was someone right there by his side, without him worrying that he would drag them into this mess. He wished that his dad were here.

He jolted at the thought of his dad. He’d never thought of him for a long time because Grisha Jaeger had passed away when he was very young, so he didn’t have any vivid memories of him. He just knew that his dad was a doctor and a scientist, which could explain the amount of zeros in his parents’ savings account. He must have been nine or ten when it happened, when he had to stand there at the funeral service, hearing that his dad had died in a fire in his lab. He didn’t remember that day clearly, but ever since that one member of his family had been ripped away from him, it was only Eren and his mom. She was his anchor, his savior, his everything.

Until that night.

The brunet touched the chain clinging around his neck, fingering the thin metal and contemplating about the reasons why its presence was there. He finally pulled the necklace slowly and his green eyed came in contact with that familiar golden key. It was thin and long, just as he remembered. It was one thing that remained prominent in his memories because his dad would always carry it around him in the house, wherever he went. He used it for something—for some room or safe, maybe—but Eren couldn’t grasp that one detail from the file cabinet of his brain. It was so damn frustrating.

“What are you trying to give me, dad?” he mumbled absentmindedly.

But…it was _not_ his dad who gave it to him.

_Shit._

So, someone else knew about this.

It couldn’t be Mike because he would’ve had already told him about it if he was the one who delivered the key to him. It wasn’t Erwin because he lacked the personal history of Eren’s and as intimidating the man was, he didn’t strike him as the type to let go of such important piece in this puzzle. So who was it?

He considered calling the shipping company who had unceremoniously dropped off the package in his front door, but it would be futile. There were no other details on the box when he got it besides from that familiar handwriting that spelled out _Eren Jaeger._  

Before he had the chance to pull his hair out, thinking of impossible questions with no solutions, he grabbed his keys and phone before he finally left his apartment. Being stuck in this hopeless predicament wasn’t something he’d asked for, but to sit around and do nothing wasn’t an option either.

 

 

* * *

 

Mike’s workplace was probably the most odd area to be around with, like _what is a FBI department doing upstairs of an arcade place?_ However, it seemed reasonable considering what the members did for a living. He walked passed through the blaring sounds of giant Flappy Bird and Temple Run machines, that DDR platform, and the many kids who were furiously moving the controller of whatever game they were playing. His eyes darted around in a nervous manner, the jumpy feeling in his chest wouldn’t go away as if someone was going to gun him down from every corner of the room. The thought was ridiculous, but after that incident at the bakery, everything wasn’t impossible anymore. He wouldn’t be surprise if his killer were already in a hidden booth somewhere, waiting for the opportunity to stab him with the knife. Thinking about that made his steps feel like lead, too heavy to head towards that familiar blonde mop of hair.

Erwin was leaning on the wall next to a door that said STAFF ONLY and he wondered if the workers inside were polishing weapons or were carrying their burly bodies that could squash Eren on the wall with a splat. He shook his head to get rid off the thoughts; the last thing he wanted was to piss his pants. He had to remind himself that the FBI agents he had met so far were normal (well, Erwin kinda was…).

When he reached the agent, they didn’t exchange a word and only entered the room. It was strangely quiet and the picture of scary men dissipated in an instant.

“I heard that you want to know about the other cases,” Erwin said, breaking the tense silence between them as he led the two of them through this narrow spiral staircase. The younger almost shoved his face once or twice when his steps faltered on the steps, and he was thankful that he had a vice grip on the railing.

“Yes, Mike said that I should hear about them.”

The blonde nodded, as if agreeing silently to his old partner’s decision before he spoke, “Yes, I think it’s best for you to hear about them. I usually do not agree about letting some outsider into any case, but you are already involved this much.”

He swallowed. He didn’t like the sound of being “involved this much” and he preferred being on the sidelines, but he couldn’t help but feel like he was a main player to this game. Yes, it was like a game and there were obviously two sides to this. He didn’t know how powerful their opponent was but they sure were powerful enough to erase all their traces. However, the mention of the other cases that had caught the FBI’s attention was proof enough that they weren’t perfect as they seemed to be. No, their schemes and plays had holes and if Eren could only find out what they were, he’d dive into them.

The cemented floor he was walking on had turned into white floors with specks of granite in them. They weren’t in a small staff room now but inside of a room just as big as the arcade area was. There were lines of desk and strewn papers and opened laptops were placed on them. The surprising part of it was that there were only three people present, and one of them was sitting close to the entrance door, which Erwin had opened for him. Mike put his gaze on his and Eren wondered how could the gentle baker he had once knew, turn into this man with a firm expression on his face.

“Eren, glad that you’ve made it.” His voice sounded tired, something that Eren was finally familiar with. The small smile that was offered to him followed and the young man was grateful that he could at least breathe normally now.

“This is important,” he simply said, shrugging. He was gestured to sit on one of the wooden chairs in front of Mike’s desk and Erwin took the one on his opposite side. Knowing that he was friends with Levi had put calmness in his chest, because it meant that he could trust the older man not to pull a gun on him. _Hopefully._

“Are you familiar with Rod Reiss?”

He definitely remembered seeing the name more than once in his life; he couldn’t possibly miss it if it was constantly on one magazine or newspaper after another. Rod Reiss was a successful business tycoon who donated quite a fair share in _a lot_ of charities, told his story about rising from dirt and nothingness to someone as popular as he was now, and many people had dubbed him the “Good Samaritan on Earth.” Eren honestly felt like the whole ordeal was pretentious because no one could be that perfect—because anyone whose ground they walked on was practically kissed by everyone else around them, _always_ had dirt on them.

And by how his thoughts were clicking in place with Mike’s question, he had every right to doubt Rod Reiss.

“Yes.”

Erwin then stated, “Someone tipped us that he has an underground business.” A pause. “Apparently, the “Good Samaritan” has been feeding himself off people who seek something to quench their addiction.”

It took a few moments before he spoke. “He’s a drug lord,” Eren uttered in shock. Okay, that one he should’ve had expected but hearing it was something else entirely. This whole quagmire that he was in could _not_ possibly have anything to do with his mom’s death, right?

“A very successful one at that,” Mike added. His blonde eyebrows were pulled down to the center of his forehead, looking like he was deep in thought, before he continued, “Two years ago, someone filed a case about this black market and when we were about to investigate, the man had died in his apartment. It looked like he hung himself.”

Oh.

He was going to be sick.

The similarities of the two situations were signaling an alarm in his head, threatening to implode. He knew that his mom was clean, he was sure of that and there was no convincing otherwise. So, how come they plotted her murder?

_She knew something. And they silenced her._

It was too soon to assume anything but that one thought echoed in his mind like a siren and he could barely think of anything. He was oblivious to the fact that his hands were shaking and they stopped when one memory had presented itself to him.

His green eyes snapped towards Erwin’s direction and he tremblingly mumbled, “Levi knows something about Rod Reiss, right?”

Those blue eyes widened, something that cracked his solid composition, and before he could answer, someone’s phone tore the heavy atmosphere around them. It was Erwin’s, and the agent flicked his gaze away to look at the caller’s name. Confusion momentarily passed his expression and Eren’s impatience flared. Before he could say something, the blonde placed his gaze on him to silence him down.

“Levi?”

Oh, crap. His anger instantly ebbed away before it got replaced with blinding panic. Why the hell was Erwin answering his phone at this time?! Didn’t he know that they had practically sworn to secrecy about this case?

He couldn’t hear anything but there was a shift in Erwin’s expression that froze Eren’s nerves again. He felt cold. He felt like the air was sucked out of his lungs. A few moments later, the older man ended the call. He was still pinning Eren down with his blank stare, before he let some panic finally seep through it.

“What happened?” Mike asked. The brunet couldn’t find his voice to say something when the thudding in his chest was very loud against his eardrums. He had a bad feeling about this, and this ominous premonition was going to drive him nuts soon if Erwin still wouldn’t open his mouth.

“There was a car accident.”

That one statement sent Eren sprinting down the door, almost breaking the door in half and ignoring the shouts from the two men he sat down with just a second ago. He only had one thought in his mind.

_No, I’m not gonna lose him too._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the cliffy *sweatdrops* uhmm maybe I can post another chapter sometime this week ? XD


	15. Past, Present, Future

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eren finds Levi and Levi, being the little smartass he is, decides to drop an unknown bomb to Eren. Eren also finds Mike and makes a decision that could possibly cause his entire future with Levi.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: MAJOR FLUFF AHEAD AND YES, SOME DARK STUFF TOO, BUT MOSTLY FLUFF XD

**I don’t own SnK or any songs mentioned here.**

* * *

 

_“Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage”._

_— Lao Tzu_

* * *

**~Chapter Fifteen: Past, Present, Future~**

           

A car accident.

Of course. Just how fucking ironic was that?

Just a minute ago before he bolted out of that building, he was clearly discussing about his mother’s death and right when he was on the verge of finding something significant, this happened. This _fucking_ happened.

He didn’t bother with the details, as he was fast to running, not minding that little fact that he didn’t know where Levi was. Of course, that wasn’t wholly true. He knew that the lawyer would be at his workplace— _should_ be at his workplace—and the fact that it could be miles away was tucked away to the back of his brain. He could only think of one name, just one person, and just one face.

_Levi._

His legs were burning like they were on fire and his sweat was already clinging to his shirt, threatening to suffocate him. His lungs were begging for him to stop and take gulps of oxygen or they would fail him at some point and it was evident by his wheezing, but he couldn’t afford to stop now. He didn’t _want_ to stop. He had to get there. He had to be there for him.

He wasn’t aware that he was crying until he arrived at a busy street and a crowd of people was waiting for the sign to light up for them. However, he had already set up an invisible ticking clock in his brain and he couldn’t stop the irrational fear that pushed him towards the road that was littered with cars. Men, women, and children had halted in their tracks to stare at him and some even gasped out of shock when a car screeched into a stop centimeters away from him. He numbly apologized, hardly aware of the many honks directed to him, before he sprinted down the street and collided with some strangers as he made his way to a familiar street. His whole body was aching by the time a black Mercedes-Benz stopped at the end of the block he was in.

Erwin got out of the car and made his way to Eren, pushing through the filtering pile of people coming out from shops around them. He had a firm grasp on the brunet who attempted to pull away from the vice grip that the blonde had on him. He was a lot stronger than the brunet was. He already knew that he was losing both of his battles at the moment—one against Erwin and the other against time.

“You have to calm down, Eren,” he told him with his absurd composed expression, like the situation wasn’t grave enough to fuss over. It merely made Eren’s anger spur on.

“What the fuck are you talking about?! _Calm down?_ Are you fucking kidding me?!” He all but shouted, not giving a damn that the people around them were giving them brief looks before going to their own way. It was the city and the last thing that they would do was pry into someone else’s business, or pay attention to some deranged student who was about to lose his head because his lover could be covered in _red_ right now.

_Oh, God, no._

“You just ran out. You didn’t let me finished what I was saying,” Erwin said as a matter-of-fact, his blue eyes were narrowing accusingly to the young man. He dragged him to his car, making sure that he was buckled up before he went to the driver’s side.

He knew that he should listen to the older male but when his emotions were running on a rampage inside his chest, it was hard to think straight. The only thing that was on his mind was that smile that belonged to the man that he loved—that he promised to protect. He was oblivious to the angry, frustrated tears running down his cheeks. He was a weeping mess, needless to say. And he refused to look at Erwin at the moment, because he knew that the blonde would give him a look of pity.

“Levi isn’t in any danger. You don’t have to worry.”

Oh, how those words brought out the greatest relief in him.

His chest finally loosened up, like the strings that squeezed it tightly finally disappeared, and he began gasping for air to fill up his screaming lungs. He wasn’t aware that he was shaking badly until his hands filled his vision and he clasped them together to stop his nerves from rattling further before he fucking breaks down. He finally noticed his tears and he roughly wiped them away on his grey shirt—the color reminded him of Levi’s eyes, and he couldn’t wait until he saw them again. He’d do _anything_ to see them again.

“Then, what’s the accident all about?” he asked, voice trembling slightly, and he attempted to stop it by gritting his teeth.

“He called because he _witnessed_ an accident. He isn’t in one,” Erwin reassured him.

“Thank God. Oh, God,” he breathed out.

“You…” the older male started, making Eren glance at up and he vaguely noted that they were already on the road. “You really care about Levi.”

That should go without saying. Levi had pulled him out of the shell that he built around himself—a shell that protected him from getting hurt and thus not truly trusting anyone—and that was when he started accepting that it was possible to honestly love someone without hesitation. He cared about a lot of people—Mikasa, Armin, and Jean were a few—but he never went as far as opening up to them. They comforted him but they were not able to grab a hold of his heart. But Levi did it. Levi broke down his barriers, exposing himself to him, and without his knowledge about the possible consequences, Eren gave his heart wholly to the grey-eyed man. He let himself fall in love with him, knowing that he had given Levi an essential part of himself and that if he were to hurt Eren, he could do it anytime.    

But he trusted him _not to_.

He realized just now that he was unbelievably vulnerable when it came to Levi—that he could easily break because of him.

Because he gave his heart to him.

The moment Erwin killed the engine of the car, the brunet didn’t waste any time and he ran outside, slamming the car door close. He didn’t know where to look but by how the traffic was pointing straight ahead and how the sirens were blaring loudly not too far away, he figured where to look for Levi. He pumped the rest of his energy to his legs, knowing that one side effect of this adrenaline, the only substance that was pushing him through right now, would involve his body crashing later. But it didn’t matter.

It didn’t matter when he saw that short stature leaning on the silver Maserati parked on the curb, not too far from the cops’ vehicles.

“Levi.”

He couldn’t have shouted it because his strength was on its lowest point and his knees were threatening to buckle down as he stepped closer to the familiar man, but Levi turned around.

And he was looking at him with a surprised gaze, his figure against the background of the red-orange horizon behind him. Eren almost laughed.

His worries, his anxieties, and his fear—they all drained him the necessary vigor to get to his destination, and his knees collapsed on the rough pavement, feeling a slight burn and he knew that despite his jeans, his knees were probably scraped a bit.

“Eren?” Levi’s voice was closer now and before the brunet could lift his eyes that were staring incredulously on the sidewalk, he felt his body being pulled forward to that warm body that he longed for.

“Levi. Levi,” he murmured softly as he worked his hands around the short man’s neck, careful not to squeeze hard and not to choke him in the process. He felt arms wounding tight around his waist and he sighed contently. He wasn’t conscious of the fact that there were people staring at them—some of them might be Levi’s coworkers—because the only thing that ran in his mind at that moment was the fact that Levi was in his arms with his scent filling his nose, evidence that he was alive.

“You didn’t think that I got into that car accident, did you?” Levi asked him in a mocked shocked tone, and Eren would’ve rolled his eyes if not for the fact that he was fucking scared out of his wits just a minute ago. When he didn’t give a reply, he felt Levi shake with obvious laughter and for once, the young man wanted to slap the side of the lawyer’s head. And he was _very, very_ close to doing so.

“What’s so damn funny?” He didn’t bother to hide his growing anger and that effectively stopped Levi from bursting into laughter as Eren felt him grow rigid. The raven pulled his head from Eren’s neck and his grey eyes softened visibly to him. The irritation that he felt a moment ago had melted away from his veins and he merely looked at Levi curiously.

“Sorry. I suppose that was inappropriate. I…I didn’t know that I mean this much to you.” The slight hesitation in the older man’s part made his heart ache. _He doesn’t know how much he means to me? If I tell him that I’m possibly working with the FBI right now without his knowledge for the sake of his protection, then he’ll probably rip my innards out._

“I ran. I don’t know how far I got but I did, before Erwin…”

Levi put a finger on his lips and he immediately closed his mouth before he blabbered more. His eyes spoke such gentleness and gratefulness and Eren wanted to reply that Levi didn’t need to say anything because he would run until his heart gave out again and again…just for him.

“To go such length… Really. You’re such a brat. You have no idea how much I…” he trailed off and the green-eyed man strained his ears to listen to the rest of what the raven was about to say. “ _Je suis amoureux de toi_ , Eren. To the point that it’s totally fucking driving me crazy.”

Oh, no.

Levi just had to go all French on him at such a moment that he’d been waiting for. And Eren couldn’t decipher the exact meaning behind those foreign words. He bit his lip in order to prevent the groan that wanted to escape from his mouth. He felt like there was a deep and important message from those words, but knowing Levi, he probably wouldn’t repeat them again and Eren would never get the chance to ask _Siri_ to translate it for him.

But he somehow knew that Levi was conveying his feelings—his _love—_ for him. It was ridiculous to kneel on the sidewalk with people bristling past them and with some stopping to look at them, but Eren felt like he could already melt into a pile of goo from his nerves earlier and by the sight right in front of him. Those pale cheeks were tinted pink, without a doubt, in a bit of embarrassment, yet those beautiful grey eyes didn’t leave his teal-green ones.

He realized it at that moment.

He couldn’t afford to lie to this man any longer. He couldn’t afford to lose his trust on him. He couldn’t afford to be separated from him.

Not when Levi was practically offering him his heart right then.

He wanted to solve the mystery behind his mom’s death and now that he found out that there was a bigger picture about this whole case, he could see that it would no longer become a small matter to hide from everyone he cared about. Mikasa, Armin, Jean, and his other friends could potentially end up like Mike. And Levi…Eren wouldn’t know what it would be like to live without the other’s presence, not anymore. As much as he wanted to find his mom’s killer, he had to stop and think of the other possibilities.

_We’re dealing with Rod Reiss. Who am I to know that my friends and Levi will not get involved in this? He will find me when he knows that I’m digging around. He will find my friends and will use them against me. Can I actually go through that?_

He already knew the answer to that before his thoughts could fully form in his head.

No, he wouldn’t be able to risk the important people in his life who were alive and well. He’d have to apologize to his mother for his decision, but the only image in his mind was collectively those familiar faces that surrounded him his whole life. And the smile that he promised to protect.

He could only picture his mom’s smile though, as if telling him that she was proud of what his decision was. It brought fresh tears in his eyes and before Levi could freak out on him, he stopped him with one sentence.

That one sentence that he was willing to say whenever he could from now on.

That one sentence that would end his plan in confronting his unknown enemy.

That one sentence that would leave the past behind and would let him face his future.

That one sentence that signified his promise to never break the others’ trust again, especially Levi’s.

That one sentence…

_“I love you, Levi.”_

He felt the saltiness of his porcelain tears and before his eyes could widen in disbelief at the sight of the older man tearing up, his lips were fully captured by the man that he’d sacrificed everything for.

He whispered those three words over and over against his lips. Those three words that would always squeeze his chest tight and make his heart do a fluttering dance, just like now. Those three words that he promised to say to Levi the night that he started believing in fate. Those three words that he was willing to wait forever for Levi to say back to him. But now, he was content with what he had.

He had Levi.

He had his friends.

He would let go of the past now.

 

* * *

 

“Eren?”

The brunet smiled sheepishly at his boss who was in the process of turning the sign CLOSED when he appeared in front of the bakery. Mike motioned for him to come inside and Eren obliged. He heard the telltale sound of the chiming trinket above the entrance door, and he let his eyes wandered at the clean shop.

“Do you want something to drink? Or eat?” Mike asked him with a smile. He shook his head in response, letting the silence take over them once again.

“It’s been more than five years,” he started and he obviously caught the blonde’s attention by how his shoulders stiffened and he shifted to stand face-to-face in front of his friend. “I woke up in a hospital without a clue what I was doing there, then Mikasa told me the news. She told me that Mom had passed away. After that, I went through a phase…”

He glanced outside through the window, which reflected some lights from the cars outside as the sky turned midnight blue. He remembered that it was during this time when he woke up with tubes connecting his body to beeping machines and his body ached with the sudden confusion and frustration because he was clawing at the nothingness in his mind. He couldn’t remember what happened. And after the time he spent trying to find clues, he finally pieced them together.

There was a possibility that what the others had been hiding from him was the fact that there was a link between him and the car crash. He had a feeling…that he was _with_ his mom when it happened.

“I almost ruined my life. I fought a lot, almost got involved with gangs, barely ate, got into unhealthy…stuff.”

This was the part of his life that he was trying to forget. Whenever he started remembering things from the past, starting from his mom’s death, he would automatically shut down the rest of the influx before he could start recalling _that_ state he was in. However, now that he started discussing about it himself, he could now clearly remember his past self that was impulsive, reckless, and uncaring.

It was during his second semester as a junior in high school. After he remained by the side of his mom’s funeral, he watched people come and go and whisper things such as “look at that boy…didn’t even shed a tear.” The reason was his heart was already empty. Too empty to even let a tear leak out. Mikasa and her family raised him afterwards, and they attempted to fill in the void in his chest but it was futile. He was already past his breaking point.

He tried to find the things that could replace that emptiness inside him, and there was that one incident in his school.

This big student, the star player of the football team, surrounded this lanky guy at the back of the school where no one was around but Eren. It was his usual hangout, his escape, because he couldn’t stand being surrounded by laughing or smiling people—it was only because he didn’t want Mikasa on his ass about being absent that he still bothered coming to school. He even had to look both ways before he could skip his class. And that day, he just had to be fucking disturbed.

The shitty jock shoved the thin frame of that guy against the wall and Eren could hear what it sounded like a crunching sound and he partly hoped that it wasn’t what he thought it was. Next to blood, he hated everything about bones. He was gonna ignore them but the moment his eyes darted and met the poor student’s eyes, he felt a jolt in his body. There was some fire that ignited inside him, which was something he hadn’t felt in days, and he could laugh at that moment because he wasn’t _fucking feeling heroic_ ; it was the last thing in his To Do List. But whatever hesitance left inside him snapped the moment the bastard threw his fist to the quaking, harmless-looking boy. And faster than a lightning, he was out of that isolated bubble of his and he let everything out—his anger, his fury, his _grief_ , his sorrow, and his _loneliness_. And that was how he ended up with a battered body, thus saving Marco Bodt.

But everyone didn’t think that.

Everyone thought he was a problem child that needed to be rid of.

And Eren didn’t forget the exhilaration he felt the moment his fist collided with that asshole’s jaw. Fighting brought up the shot of adrenaline in his veins; taking him to heights and making him reel for more. That was what it all took for him to crackle into a fire hard to distinguished and neither Mikasa nor Armin could get any closer to him.

He almost died once ( _or maybe twice_ ). Once upon a time, he was unofficially fighting with a group of thugs and he had no idea—not one inkling because he was too high with this activity—that his life could be pulled right from underneath his feet. He unknowingly came to a chartered territory by a major gang and all the fighting erupted in that one area. His head was bashed once, not hard enough to make him pass out but it was obviously enough to send a waterfall of blood dripping behind his head. He barely had enough time to register that there were the indicatory sounds of police cars not from far away and he used the chance that everyone else was distracted to turn his heels away and exit from that perilous life he got involved in.

He mended his wound by himself in his old house, which was surprisingly easy to break into. He couldn’t afford to see Mikasa or anyone else in her family and face the disappointment or the worrying looks that he clearly didn’t deserve. He didn’t know what else to do as the realization crushed into him—he had ruined his life and almost lost it. He reminisced the times when he was with his mom, the moments when he was genuinely happy, and he could still see that familiar smile on her face as she told him how much she loved him. She loved him and _yet he was destroying his life._

He completely and utterly failed her.

It was during that time when Jean came into his life, his classmate who he had always argued with and talked to before the incident had happened. How did the goof even find him in the first place still remained a mystery to him. However, all his agitation and his aguish all poured out the second Jean said those words to him.

_“You’re not alone. You just can’t see them yet—that right next to you are people who care about you. And I’m willing to open your eyes, Eren.”_

That was how he started to care, about Jean, about his other friends, and about himself. He recalled that Jean had taken him to his family doctor when he told him that he hated hospitals, and he was really appreciative of the notion. That night was the start of his rebuilding his being once again, and he couldn’t have done it without his friends.

This was a story that he would now be willing to share with Levi. This was the story that he shoved at the back of his mind every single time.

This was the story of the broken boy he used to be.

“The past is something I want to bury, but I know that that’s not an option.” He looked at Mike with a sad smile on his face and continued, “I don’t want to live in the past anymore, Mike. I want to cherish those people who are still in my life.”

Much to his surprise, his boss started tearing up. “It must have been hard for you, Eren… Must have been difficult…”

The young man continued to smile at him as he said, “My friends made it easier for me.”

Mike rubbed his eyes and returned the smile that the brunet sent him. He walked closer to Eren and gently ruffled his hair. “You’ve grown this much within two years. I still remember how you innocently peered into this bakery that night, with a job list in your hand.”

“And my stomach growled then you gave me an entire loaf of bread with Nutella.” He laughed. It was one of the greatest memories that had accumulated during his stay here around this neighborhood.

Those light brown eyes softened as tears blurred their vision. “I’m sorry if I brought you unnecessary crapload of dilemma, Eren. If only I didn’t tell you…”

He shook his head and looked at him. “No, it wasn’t your fault. If anything, I should be thanking you because you told me the truth.”

“But sometimes, the truth is better left unsaid.”

“I don’t believe that. Someday, I’ll have to tell Levi about my own issues, too. Nothing can be buried forever.”

“…Are you alright, then? Letting go of all these?” Mike asked, his gaze was seeking the truth from Eren.

“Yes. I don’t want to risk my life or anybody else’s,” he answered him sincerely. That was all the reassurance that Mike sought, and he gave out a sigh. The weight on their shoulders were finally lifted off them and they both thought of how could one incident involving a loved one could quickly turn Eren’s mind a hundred eighty degrees.

 _Levi is good for Eren_ , Mike thought with a smile.

_They are indeed perfect for each other._

“Please, tell Erwin not to mention to Levi about the Reiss case again.” Mike agreed to that request without a question.

“Oh, and Cap?” Eren started with a smile.

“Yeah?”

“Can I take a month off?”

* * *

 

Eren opened the door of his apartment and the smell of something delicious immediately hit his nose. Oh, how he loved waking up and going home to _his_ cooking.

“Levi?” he called out, letting a big grin make its way on his face.

“Right here, brat,” Levi answered from inside.

He passed the living room and headed straight to the kitchen where his favorite sight had greeted him: Levi in his bunny apron. For some reason, his boyfriend seemed to be enjoying putting on that outfit ever since he told him the history of the pink material, and the green-eyed lad couldn’t really complain. In fact, he enjoyed it as much as Levi did.

“Did you get to talk to your boss?” the raven asked him. He was putting a pot on the table, where the plates and cups were already set. Eren could really get used to this.

“Mhm, yeah.”

“And he’s letting you take off an entire month?” Levi pressed on, now motioning for the younger to sit down. He followed the older male and once settled down, Levi began to place some of the stew he cooked in each other’s bowl.

“Yeah. I mean, it’s gonna be summer soon. It’s natural to travel and all,” Eren said.

“Wipe that eat-shitting grin off your face, kid,” Levi chided him but he was wearing an amused smile himself.

“But I can’t! It’s unbelievable that you’re inviting me to go to France!” the younger exclaimed, beaming as he raised a spoonful of the soup to his mouth. He let that to-die-for taste explode in his mouth and he didn’t bother suppressing the moan from his lips. “Can you cook for me forever, Levi?” he asked dreamily, closing his eyes dramatically. He heard a laugh and opened one eye to look at the shorter man.

“You gotta put a ring on me if you want that, brat,” Levi countered back with a smirk that Eren loved on him.

He felt some giddiness running inside him, which most likely because the weight that he had been carrying for the past few weeks had finally been lifted off him. This made him appear to be more playful than usual as he said, “Then, maybe I will.”

Levi’s eyes widened a fraction, but it didn’t go undetected by Eren.

“Someday,” he finished with a teasing smile hanging on his lips. There was a slight blush on his cheeks and he couldn’t help but feel a little full of himself when he witnessed the once stoic man almost choking on his soup.

“Brat,” Levi grumbled as he chugged down some water. Those grey eyes wandered around the place but Eren and the younger couldn’t help but let the bubble of laughter escape from him, because Levi was looking _downright embarrassed._

“I love you.”

Another surprise attack. And Eren was sure that he would get a nosebleed at how Levi’s face went from a baby pink to a ripe tomato red.

Eren finished the last spoonful of his food and he reached towards Levi who was sitting across from him. For a second, he wished that he had a round table instead of a four-person, rectangular one; that way, he wouldn’t have such difficulty to grab the back of the older male’s neck and crash his lips on his, just like what he was thinking of now.

Levi caught on, though, and just to tease him back, he leaned back down to his chair and Eren pouted.

“C’mon, Levi,” he whined. Then his eyes flashed in mischievousness and he began, “ _Cause you're the apple to my pie (pie). You're the straw to my berry (berry)—“_

The older male started to laugh uncontrollably, wheezing out a “Oh, my God. Stop.” But Eren merely pitched a higher note, which he surprisingly pulled off.

“ _You're the smoke to my high (high). And you're the one I wanna marry (marry)_ —“

“God, Eren, stop, you shitty brat…” More of that laughter that turned into drunken-like giggles, and it was the only thing that topped off Eren’s embarrassment at the moment.

“ _'Cause you're the one for me (for me). And I'm the one for you (for you). You take the both of us (of us). And we're the perfect two_ —“

Levi groaned loudly; now his face was placed in his hands, elbows propped on the table. He was clearly still stifling his laughter.

“ _We're the perfect two. We're the perfect two. Baby me and you. We're the perfect two_ …” Eren sang, and he burst out laughing at the last note. “Oh, my God. You could’ve at least sung with me!”

“Hello no, brat!”

Levi revealed his flushed face to Eren, tears were leaking out of his eyes and the brunet ceased his laughter and stared at his lover a meter away from him. Those silver pools seemed to draw him towards the man and he didn’t dare resist that attraction, so he walked behind his short-stack. He slowly wrapped his arms around the raven’s shoulders, his chest pressed upon his back and his lips right next to Levi’s ear. The warmth between them was shared right through the two layers of clothes, and it made Eren sigh contently.

“But I think we _are_ the perfect two,” he murmured. Levi lifted his hand and touched the younger’s arm that was laid across his chest and was encasing him. He gave it a squeeze and Eren could see him smiling right now even if he couldn’t see him directly.

“I think so, too,” he murmured back. The older man then turned around, and Eren noted how they were now only an inch away from each other and were practically sharing one breath. It was the intimacy that he always got whenever his lover was around to shower him with his care and his love. Right now, he could only think about erasing that distance between them by leaning forward.

And that was he did, but not before saying those three words again.

“I love you, Levi.”

“Eren—“

He kissed the grey-eyed man with a passion that burst into wild fire in both of their veins. The heat between them was of a starting inferno that could consume them because their emotions were poured just as intense as it was, but it wasn’t scary. It was welcoming. Eren moved without a drafted objective in mind; he merely followed the flutter of his heart and enjoyed the way his body seemed to spark when in contact with Levi.

And Levi felt just the same, to the point that he felt terrified that he wouldn’t be able to go back to how he used to be if he was to be apart from Eren. He was terrified…of this fire distinguishing right before his eyes. And these thoughts were unbeknownst to the brunet.

Eren pulled back a bit and with his glassy eyes, he said, “You’re my future, Levi.”

The grey-eyed man stared at him, his irises were being swallowed by that stirring desire in him, before he replied, “I’ve been yours since the day I met you, Eren.”

Blinking back tears, the younger man smiled, reflecting the great happiness erupting inside him.

“And I belong to you, Levi.”

_And that was one thing that would remain true in this lifetime…and in next one to follow._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did I cause a mini heart-attack last chapter? Whoops. XD I hope this makes up for that hahahaha Thanks for reading and for the kudos and the comments and I love y'all! See you next Thursday! (AP tests are coming TvT Whelp)


	16. Hometown

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Levi introduces Eren to his hometown.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow. OMG A thousand of sorry's because I forgot to update... school has been hard on me these days D: But here is the awaiting chapter~!

**I don’t own SnK**

* * *

_“Love takes off masks that we fear we cannot live without and know we cannot live within.”_

_— James Baldwin_

* * *

 

**~Chapter Sixteen: Hometown~**

“How was it?” Levi asked the first thing Eren came into his door.

It was their routine now—Eren would always drop by the lawyer’s house, sometimes with a duffle bag of clothes, after his class, but today was the day that the student would finally stop being one. Why? Well, because it was already summer break.

The brunet looked a bit forlorn and he could tell by how Levi’s face fell down the slightest that he convinced him with his acting. He placed his Converse shoes on the rack by the entryway (something that Levi reminded him every single time he came over) before settling down on the couch where the raven was standing by. He slouched a bit, seemingly upset but he was just really trying hard not to laugh. He’d learned not to look at his boyfriend whenever he was trying to hide something from him because he was definitely not the good liar around.

“There’s always next time, brat. If you just let me, I’ll fucking pay every penny for next semester—“

He couldn’t hold it in. He laughed so hard, wheezing out a “I PASSED!”

“You…” Before Levi could grab a hold of him, Eren dodged the arm that swiped above his head. He knew that his lover would retaliate someway, and he wasn’t going to have any of that. Nuh uh. So, he did every five-year-old would do.

Run.

The young man already knew his way around the raven’s house after his constant visits. He’d been to his room many times, sometimes, just to cuddle with him or talk to each other until both of them fell asleep. And ‘pristine’ wouldn’t even cut for its description. Those were the precious memories that he’d built with Levi—after he finally gave up on his _other_ objective. He wanted to spoil Levi and be spoiled in return, to love him and to be loved, and to take care of him and be taken care of. It was the future that Eren wanted with the best person he had in his life.

He ran to the kitchen, knowing fully well that his boyfriend was on his trail and that he would catch up to him soon. The green-eyed lad used the island in the middle of the kitchen and grabbed the sides of it as Levi came into his view. He tried to feign to run to the right and went to the left instead, but the raven was having none of that. The older man was faster than he was, despite Eren being nine years younger than he was. He always forgot that Levi was better at almost everything than he was—cooking, strength, speed, and his success in life just in general. Thinking that your partner was in a higher standard than you were ought to be frustrating, but not to Eren. He was always proud of his lover, to the point that sometimes he felt undeserving of him.

But he loved Levi too much to let go. He already loved him this much to the point that he couldn’t envision any other future without him in it.

“You brat!” the grey-eyed man yelled out as he grabbed Eren’s arm before the latter could even attempt to escape from him. He pulled the brunet to him with such force that the younger almost toppled backwards if not for the strong chest that his back was pressed upon. The gesture was quick at making his blood rush to his face and the heat that was spreading into his body was immediate when his short-stack propped his chin on Eren’s shoulder.

“Le-Levi?” he squeaked, blushing full-force.

“Mhm?” the man hummed, and oh, the sound of his voice. It almost made the brunet’s knees turn into a pile of goo. He bit his bottom lip, knowing that his boyfriend would react intensely if he were to see him do that, so he was glad that he wasn’t facing him. He would not let Levi do anything _hot_ in the middle of the day, for Pete’s sake!

“LEVI~!”

The couple both snapped their heads towards the shrilly voice that was becoming louder and louder. The raven forcibly detangled his arm around the younger—it was really hard to let go—and he was sure that Eren felt the same by the groan that escaped from his mouth when the warm body against him disappeared. That, or he wasn’t really just ready to face a 5’6” spring of joy _._ Or madness, really.

Hanji Zoe came into view a second later; her glasses were almost falling down the bridge of her nose and her now long hair was in ponytail. The woman was wearing plaid shirt and jeans shorts, which reminded Eren how hot it was outside and he was glad that Levi wasn’t going to be anal about turning on the AC (perhaps, the lawyer was too indifferent about his electric bills).

“Did I… interrupt something? You’re not relieving some sexual tension in the kitchen, are you?!” She exclaimed dramatically, the amusement in her eyes was dancing too wildly, which clearly indicated how much she loved teasing the couple. And this made Eren recall the days she pestered him about his relationship with Levi and how did _that_ —Levi getting into a relationship—happen in the very first place.

Apparently, Eren was Levi’s first relationship in years. And by years, he meant ten longass years.

Needless to say, the young man was ecstatic. He might not have been the older male’s first lover but it felt like it by how Levi reacted around him, by what they were together—a whole.

“Shut up, four-eyes,” Levi hissed, sounding irritated but Eren knew better. As much as annoying the redhead seemed to be, she was really important in the lawyer’s life. He could testify to that by how amused his boyfriend looked like whenever he talked about his two close friends. Eren knew the feeling; as much as overbearing Mikasa and Armin could be at times, they were the people who brought him back to the surface when he was struggling in the past.

Hanji merely laughed and she walked up to them so casually like she hadn’t commented something inappropriate about the couple just a second ago.

“I swear it was so hard getting used to this ever-so-loving Levi Ackerman who, by the way, could almost turn everyone who looked at him into shish-kebab,” she said thoughtfully. She propped her elbows on the counter, her chin resting on her palm, as she stared at Eren. He scrunched his eyebrows before lifting one up, as if to ask _what?_

“You’re good for Levi. Hell, you two are perfect together.” The subject of the discussion was getting the pitcher of water from his refrigerator, and he almost dropped it when he heard that from his friend. He sharply turned to them, as Eren watched closely for his reaction, and Levi glared at Hanji. But the thing was it wasn’t even convincing because his face was turning pink. It made the woman snicker in entertainment.

“Stop your yapping, Zoe. Why are you even here?” he grumbled, smoothing down his expression before he could embarrass himself further. But it was already too late—Eren was close to turning red himself because _Levi is so goddamned cute. Dang it!_

“I was going to ask you about your work. I heard that you’re going on a vacation again!”

He rolled his eyes at her and simply said, “I’m going to Lyon.”

“HAH?!” she yelled out. “What?! Why am I not informed of this?!”

“Because you don’t know when to fucking shut up—“ The short man didn’t even get to finish his sentence before Hanji interrupted him “oh-so-rudely”.

“Are you bringing Eren?” she asked excitedly, eyes darting between the raven and the brunet alternatively. At the mention of his name, the younger blushed and looked at Levi, waiting for him to be the one to give the answer to the overly hyped woman.

“Yes, I am.”

“OH MY GOD! I wanna go!” she screamed enthusiastically, making both men in the kitchen cringe at the sound. A vein could’ve had popped in Levi’s temple and the urge to kick his so-called-friend was growing stronger by every word she uttered.

“No way in hell I would allow that,” he deadpanned, rubbing his ear.

She gasped and slammed her hands on the counter. “What! Why not?!”

“One person with undying energy is enough. I don’t need to babysit two,” Levi stated as a matter-of-fact.

Confusion must have had shown on Eren’s face because what his boyfriend just said didn’t really make sense to him, unless he was talking about _him_. Levi was better at reading the younger’s emotions, but before he could answer his unspoken question, Hanji had already continued her incessant whining.

“Aw, c’mon! Isabel will be so glad to see me!”

“No means no.”

“But I won’t have anything to do this summer!”

“Hang out with Erwin then.”

At the mention of the blonde, she groaned loudly as if the suggestion was repulsive as a slimy old bug. “Bushy Brows is no fun to hang out with!”

“Pfft.” Eren accidentally let out a strangled noise, trying to stifle the bubble of laughter that escaped from his lips. He slightly paled; he knew that Erwin Smith would not take it well if he were to laugh at those godly eyebrows of his. Seeing the stares that he gained from the other two, he smiled sheepishly, albeit nervously, to them.

“You have to admit that those eyebrows are goddamned thick,” Levi told him with a smirk. Never in his imagination had he heard the grey-eyed man make fun of that intimidating FBI agent. _Years of friendship probably do it._

“I told Erwin that I would pluck his eyebrows for him, but he adamantly refused!” Hanji said indignantly, and the image in Eren’s head was too much for him that he burst out laughing. He couldn’t handle the possibility that Erwin would obediently sit tight in front of Hanji while she plucked his eyebrows. What killed his laughter was another picture of the said man but with thin eyebrows; it made him shudder. That was a bit… disturbing.

“You’ll pluck all his facial hair out,” Levi said as if he knew that _would_ , without a doubt, happen. And the idea of Erwin, the man he somewhat feared, with no eyebrows sent the brunet doubling in laughter again.

“I should’ve recorded Eren’s reaction. It’s better than I thought,” the woman commented cheekily. She joined the younger in the laughter that filled the area, and Levi became a laughing mess a moment after.

Oh, God. Erwin would kill them if he were to hear them talking about him.

Somewhere in an arcade building, the said blonde man sneezed loudly, catching Mike’s attention.

“Summer cold?”

Erwin shrugged, eyes narrowing as he replied, “I have a feeling that those _two_ are talking about me.”

“Huh?”

 

* * *

           

The airport was bustling with people, children were behind their parents, and the workers were checking what they needed to check from the incoming passengers. Eren was waiting for Levi to come back from the restroom, guarding their baggage, which contained the necessities they needed for their month of vacation. The excitement that was shooting in the brunet’s veins was too much, and he was glad that he didn’t have his dose of caffeine this morning or else. He felt so exhilarated by the idea of traveling, especially with his boyfriend when he hadn’t even went anywhere out of the country since he was a kid. He still couldn’t believe that he would be able to go home with Levi to his home country—he was going to introduce Eren to where he grew up! The idea made him grin so big that he thought it would take permanent residence on his face. When the older man came back, he had to cover that smile on him with his hand. Levi merely raised one eyebrow.

“Ready?”

The younger removed his hand from his face, revealing his big smile to his lover and letting him see how excited and happy he was. They had planned this for weeks, and even if Eren was worried at first because the bakery would be one less person to handle the shop, Mike had assured him that Ymir and the others would be enough for one month. Mike had also somehow reassured him about _the other matter_ , even though Eren was still worried; he insisted that he should go and enjoy himself. Levi also took some weeks off his work but he would be bringing some of it to France, too. Letting his work pile up as a lawyer would be too much to handle, even for Levi. And Eren had to convince him that getting _at least_ six hours of sleep was a must, and his boyfriend finally acquiesce to his suggestion. The younger would even offer up some of his help if deemed necessary, really.

“Yup,” he replied, bouncing off the seat that he was sitting on. He grabbed their bags and Levi took them away from him, insisting that he could carry both despite Eren’s protests. He really felt spoiled by the older male, and it made him want to spoil him in return. France would definitely be the way to romance the life out of the lawyer, and he planned just that.

They boarded the plane and as Eren sat beside the window, he couldn’t help but feel fascinated by the fact that he was actually leaving his sanctuary, the place that he lived in for years, with Levi. It was too unrealistic, but the warmth that Levi provided him as he intertwined their fingers together had said otherwise.

This was real.

And Eren couldn’t be any happier in the presence of the love of his life.

 

* * *

 

If Eren thought that the takeoff was fucking thrilling, the landing was ten times more exhilarating to the point that he thought his heart would jump out of his chest. Levi laughed at him a few times because he couldn’t “wipe that eat-shitting grin off his face” and he was too elated to actually retort to that.

The structure of the airport fascinated him, and all the scenery that he witness from the moment he took a sit on the plane up to that moment made him want to grab some paints and work on an art piece right there. He was vaguely aware that his boyfriend was wearing a small smile while staring at him, which Eren didn’t mind because he was too distracted. He could tell that Levi was amused by how he was reacting to his new surroundings, and Eren loved every bits of it. _This was where Levi grew up, and I will get to see it._

They took the cab and his amazement didn’t die down because he just heard Levi speak his native language, which something he really loved about him. He still could remember the day he first spoke French to him and it was probably the worst or the best moment of his life—he couldn’t decide, really, because he knew there was something deep behind those words, and he really, _really_ wanted to know what those exact words were. In English, please.

As they traveled from the airport, Eren rolled down the windows and his eyes darted outside. He could feel the warm breeze hitting his face but he couldn’t care less because what he was seeing right now was definitely captivating. Tall buildings—most were of Romanesque while the others were modern looking—loomed ahead and the brunet craned his neck to see where in the sky were they headed. It was very different from the glass-paned edifices in the city where he grew up in. Art was practically embedded in this city—in this very country—where the Renaissance first boomed. Right before his brain could wander to what he learned from his art history class, his ears caught the foreign conversation that Levi was having with the cab driver. He, of course, didn’t understand any of it, but he couldn’t help but smile big Levi who turned his head to him just in time.

“He’s asking if we’re tourists. I’m not, but you definitely are,” he told the younger.

“And you’re gonna be my tour guide, right?” Eren asked, though there was really need for that question because he already knew what the grey-eyed man would say.

“Do I have a choice, brat?” Levi smiled, and the brunet was glad that his lover looked very carefree right now without the load of paperwork to weigh on his mind.

The young man rested his head on the other’s shoulder and raised their interlaced fingers before peppering the pale skin with feathery and loud-smacking kisses. He felt a deep rumble off the older male’s chest and Eren stopped with his ministration to look at him. He grinned at the relaxed expression that Levi had on his face before descending down his lips.

“I love you,” he murmured against his lips and he could feel Levi smile. He knew that he would be able to hear those words back from him, but he didn’t know when. On the other hand, he also knew that Levi was full of surprises. A surprise attack would definitely cause his heart to beat faster for him. And he couldn’t wait for that day.

For now, he was content with this—with him pressed against him and with their hearts humming simultaneously for each other.

This was really the break that both of them needed, and Eren was looking forward to the weeks that they would spend here in this city.

 

* * *

 

They were dropped off in front of an ivory house. It was definitely not as big as Levi’s but it seemed like it could fit five members of a family—it looked so _cozy_. Eren didn’t know how long had he been standing there looking like a gaping fish, and Levi prompted him to move forward, towards the red gates. The raven opened them and both of them stepped inside the premises, with Eren trying not to trip. The grass looked freshly mowed and different flowers were blooming in little pots along the lining of the front lawn. Levi was moving to the wooden door and he pulled out a key from the little luggage that he was pulling behind (Eren insisted to carry his own bag with such great effort that Levi finally let him). He successfully opened it, but not before looking back over his shoulder.

“Are you coming or not?” he asked, not really sounding impatient but more entertained, like he knew how awestruck Eren was.

“Y-Yeah!” He hurried after him, carrying the big bag he had, and the couple walked inside the house.

It wasn’t anything extravagant like what he was used to seeing at Levi’s house, but the interior was definitely warm. It was the kind of warmth that a family would give inside a house— _a home_. He took off his shoes at the entrance and he stepped into the hallway where Levi bounded. His eyes caught the photographs on the walls of the slightly narrow hallway, seeing a picture of dark-haired woman sitting on a chair and a blond-haired man standing straight behind her. On her lap was a boy, a young child whose hair was of the same color as the woman and was showing a small smile on his little face. He wasn’t aware that he was smiling, too, until Levi intercepted his thoughts.

“What are you looking at, kid?”

“Mhm. Are they your parents, Levi?” he asked, genuinely curious.

“Yes.” The raven joined him in the hallway and Eren glanced down at him.

“Your mother looks beautiful,” he breathed out.

“’Looked’, Eren. She’s not…” he trailed off, a flash of pain suddenly passed by his face but it was gone the second Eren blinked. Levi told him that it didn’t matter anymore, but Eren knew—he knew that the pain didn’t and wouldn’t go away.

He placed his arm around his boyfriend’s shoulder and kissed his temple. “She’s still alive, though. Am I right?”

He recalled that night that Levi told him that his mother would always be in his heart—alive and well. He didn’t foresee that he would be saying the same thing to the man who told him that, but he was more than happy to offer him the same comfort that he always sought of every now and then.

“You’re right,” Levi said; the tension on his body was leaving and Eren used the opportunity to plant a chaste kiss on his lips. He spoke again. “Her name is Amelia.”

The younger repeated the name in his mind like he was afraid that he would forget it—the name of one of the most important persons in Levi’s life—and he felt like it was just right to say something back to him.

“That is a beautiful name. My mother’s name is Carla. A lot of people say that I look like her,” the brunet said.

“Yeah, you do. Even if she was younger in the picture you showed me, your resemblance is kinda too spot-on,” Levi agreed.

“Well, you certainly looked like your mother. I can also see the Ackerman in you. Man, Ackermans have intimidating auras around them.” Eren let a lopsided smile grace upon his face and Levi snorted at him.

“You make is sound like I don’t have that kind of an aura.”

“Well, you certainly look like a cat—or a kitten—ow!” He yelped when a slight jab in his rib sent slight pain to him. He smirked at Levi who glared at him in warning, but Eren knew that teasing the older male would be a pastime that he would never get bored of.

“And you’re like a puppy,” Levi retorted with a playful smirk. Eren rolled his eyes at him before he let himself be pulled into the true interior of the house. And he could already feel like Levi was welcoming him into his own sanctuary— _his home_.

 

* * *

 

Levi told him that his parents bought the house because they fell in love at first sight with it. He had a thoughtful look as he told Eren tales about his childhood, resisting the puppy-dog-eyes that Eren put up when he asked some embarrassing stories or baby pictures of him—he’d admitted that he’d rather let Hanji travel with him than to submit to Eren’s humiliating requests. The brunet understood the term ‘privacy’, of course, but when one photo album under the center table suddenly caught his eyes (while Levi was in the bathroom), he lost to his temptation.

And, oh, how incredibly precious it was to see a little Levi sucking his thumb. Don’t even get him started with the way the raven was wearing a cravat, looking all aristocrat at such a young age. There was one when he was on his dad’s shoulders, laughing with a cotton candy in his hand. The next picture topped all of them.

_Oh my God, Levi used to cross-dress?! Holy—_

“Brat.” That voice certainly cut off his thoughts and made his eyes snap towards the source of the growing mass of evil, but it wasn’t enough to wipe off that grin that threatened to split his face. Man, it was really hard not to laugh. Seeing a mini-Levi in a polka-dotted dress with little pigtails was enough for him to lose a month’s blood supply. It was just _priceless._

Levi was on him in three strides and he pounced on him while Eren did his best to make use of his long limbs and get the album out of the short man’s reach. He really was thankful for his extra height at the moment. The raven clawed at his shirt, and he cringed when he heard a painful _ziiip_. Oh, for Pete’s sake, he was wearing his favorite shirt! Before they knew it, the older male was already straddling him on the couch; he was hip-to-hip, chest-to-chest, and face-to-face with the younger. They were too busy wrestling with each other that they didn’t even heard the telltale sound of a door opening and closing. The photo album dropped from Eren’s grasp with a loud thud on the floor and he was about to reach forward to grab it again but Levi held his shoulders with a vice grip, forcing him to face him. It was a moment after that they finally realized what compromising position they were in, and before they could even react—or blush for that matter—they both heard a couple of gasps.

_“Levi?!”_

And that was Eren’s first awkward meeting with Isabel Magnolia and Farlan Church. 

 

* * *

 

They were sitting at the dining table and by ‘they” Eren meant him, the petite redhead, and the pale brown-haired man. Levi was making coffee and a tea for himself, even though Eren told him that he would do it. He merely gave him a strange look and the brunette had to sit down with the two strangers who came out of nowhere at such a _perfect_ timing. He recalled how Levi suddenly froze and became beet red in a matter of two seconds. It was amusing to no end and he would have enjoyed that reaction if not for the fact that he was also just as red as he was.

“I’m Isabel, Levi’s sister! Or what I told everyone else. I heard from Hanji that Levi is coming here with _his boyfriend,_ so me and Farlan rushed here.” That earned a snort from Levi who was muttering _I’ll kill that four-eyed freak. “_ Are you Levi’s lover?” the girl asked him innocently, blinking at him as if she was analyzing him thoroughly and it honestly made him squirm a bit.

“U-Uhm. Y-Yeah,” he stuttered out, cursing inwardly because he was way off his first impression.

“You’re Eren then? I’m Farlan. We’re both Levi’s close friends, almost like siblings, really, like what Isabel said.” The guy told him with a gentle smile. He seemed to be more relaxed than the redhead who seemed to be bouncing on her seat with excitement that was reflected upon those startling green eyes. They reminded Eren of his own eyes, which was more bluish-green or something like that because no one could really point out what exact color they were. However, Isabel’s were like _green_ green. They were fascinating and he itched to paint or use color pencils at that moment. On the other hand, Farlan had gray eyes but they weren’t similar to Levi’s because the latter had blue-tinged on them; they were beautiful nonetheless. Eye color indeed never ceased to astonish him.

“Y-Yes, I’m Eren.”

“Levi hasn’t told you much about us, huh?” he asked, sparing a look at the raven who went rigid at the question. He was still at the counter and Eren wondered how much was he going to take in making the drinks. Should he just help him?

“He mentioned you a couple of times before.”

“Eh?! Big Bro just mentioned us a _couple of times_?!” Isabel shrieked and she was fast getting out of her seat before she jumped on Levi’s back. Eren spluttered, surprised at the actions of the young woman, and Farlan merely gave out a smirk that said _yup, deserve that._

“I-Isabel! Get off!”

“No!”

“You…!”

“Why didn’t you ever tell Eren _everything_?! Are you ashamed of us, Big Bro?!”

“H-HAH?! Are you an idiot?”

Few more curses and struggles played out before Eren and he heard Farlan laugh across from him. He didn’t need to look at him because the man spoke anyway.

“Mmm. I’d never thought that Levi would be ashamed of his past. I think it’s just one of his insecurities,” Farlan said. Eren finally turned to him and he continued, “You see—“

“LEVI WAS A THUG!” Isabel shouted, still clinging on the short man’s back like koala. The sight was really hilarious because Levi was trying to bounce her off him but she had him in such a clutch that Eren knew it would leave angry, red marks around the man’s neck. But what Isabel shouted was far more shocking.

“Huh?”

Farlan gave him a sheepish look before shrugging. Eren pieced the new information together, something that he was getting good at, and he gasped loudly. He swiveled to look at Levi who was definitely _not_ looking at him.

“You three _broke_ laws? You _were_ a thug? Uh, when was this?” he asked, tone went a bit higher because of his growing curiosity.

“You, brat!” Levi let out a final cry before he grabbed Isabel, swiping her around him like she didn’t weigh a hundred pounds, and she shrieked with that ear-ringing sound. He carried her bridal style before he said, “I’m dropping you in three…two…”

“Okay, okay!” She jumped off him, landing gracefully on her feet, and stuck her tongue out to the older male. He seemed pissed enough to glare at her but the girl seemed to be immune to it already and she simply sauntered back to her seat next to Eren. The brunet jumped when his lover sat beside Farlan, placing the cups of coffee and tea with a little force more than necessary.

Before he let go of the metal tray, Eren took that chance to place a reassuring hand on Levi’s. His eyes softened, which somehow eased the tension in the room, before he nodded to him. The short woman was about to gush at that; the brunet could practically see the teasing grin that was about to surface on her face.

“That’s not something I would discuss with the two idiots here,” Levi stated.

Isabel pouted, like she wasn’t affected by the mood-change. “But you have to tell Eren those stories! We spent a lot of time together!”

“Yes, yes, Isabel. All in due time,” the grey-eyed man reassured her.

Eren bit his tongue; he was gonna tell them that he was actually a delinquent in high school, something not far off from being a ‘thug’—frighteningly close to it, really, or maybe even worse. If Levi was willing to tell him his story, then Eren would too. But not now.

“Levi may be a hardheaded fool at times, but it seems like you’re the good medicine for him, Eren,” Farlan told him. Levi merely looked away and Isabel grinned.

“When we heard that he’s dating someone, we knew that we had to meet him. And wow,” she gasped out. “Eren, you’re beautiful. He wasn’t lying about that.”

“Eh? H-He called me…” The brunet couldn’t even finish his sentence as he proceeded to blush from head to toe.

“Yup. Levi is _so_ honest,” Farlan said with a teasing edge in his tone. Levi huffed in his seat; his cheeks were turning rosy pink.

“Shut up,” he grumbled quietly, clearly embarrassed.

And that was when the two friends bombarded Eren with questions, which definitely reminded him of a certain glasses-woman who might be an ocean away from them. They didn’t fail to further embarrass Levi who gave up after the third attempt of making them shut up about stories of their childhood.

He’d learned that Farlan and Isabel were the ones who were there for Levi when he was dubbed anti-social in elementary school. They played, studied, and got in trouble together. They were also the ones who were there for their short-stack when he lost his parents in high school, which something that Eren sympathize with. They didn’t, however, continued the story after that, glancing at Levi as if to cue him in but the brunet didn’t get to hear it. His lover probably preferred to talk about such private things alone with him, and Eren wouldn’t complain because he wanted that as much as the other did.

He realized that Levi was far from whom he seemed to be when they first met—isolated, emotionless, and independent—because he was certainly the opposite of that character. He had friends he relied on, he laughed, smiled, and cried with them, and he definitely had a heart that practically glowed when he was happy. He thanked the heavens that Isabel and Farlan were there for him, because he knew the pain of being alone.

And he’d never let Levi experience that. No, he would never leave him.

The very reason of that was because Eren loved him. He loved him damn too much. And he was more than willing to show him that in any form, in any way, in any words.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After the last few chapters, I believe that our couple deserve this chapter :"D


	17. Wall of Memories

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Going to beautiful places is nice, but going there with someone special is definitely better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OMG I finally remember that it's Thursday XD Here's your new chapter!
> 
> Warning: Hints of um some intense scenes LOL and like major major major FLUFF. I'm sorry if i have some mistakes, I only got to read it twice D:

**I don’t own SnK**

* * *

 

_“You see, you closed your eyes. That was the difference. Sometimes you cannot believe what you see, you have to believe what you feel. And if you are ever going to have other people trust you, you must feel that you can trust them, too--even when you’re in the dark. Even when you’re falling.”_

_― Mitch Albom_

* * *

 

**~Chapter Seventeen: Wall of Memories~**

           

Isabel and Farlan stayed over until after dinner; Levi might have looked like he was annoyed by the two “intruders” but he actually missed them. Eren could tell that by how those grey eyes sparked with amusement and with something else—something _warm_ —as he exchanged stories with his two longtime friends. After the tension left, the raven seemed to be more carefree, as if all the layers of his masks that he built were peeled away, and his tinkling laughter sent welcoming twinges in Eren’s heart. He wanted Levi to be that relaxed—more open—at all times, because he knew how taxing to put up a façade in front of the others must be. And it was hard, exhausting, and sometimes heart-breaking.

The two of them became alone in the kitchen and the brunet scanned the spotless walls and to the next room’s, the dining room. Picture frames hugged them and he saw the similar faces—of Amelia, Levi, his father, Isabel, Farlan—with some recent ones with Hanji and Erwin. He suddenly recalled something that Levi told him a while ago.

“Why don’t you have a picture of your uncle here, Levi?” he asked, curiosity laced his voice.

Levi, who was starting to clean the dishes, answered back loud enough for Eren to hear, “We’re not really close. He’s more like a passive guardian than a concerned parent. He’s an Ackerman, too.”

“So, he’s your dad’s brother, then?”

“Mmm, yeah.”

“Have Mikasa and her family met him yet?”

“No,” he paused and the brunet heard footsteps behind him. “I met her dad accidentally then we somehow connected the dots and figured out that we are actually related.”

He felt the shorter man’s presence next to him and both of them stood before the six-person dining table. “Small world, huh?” he mumbled.

“Yeah,” Levi agreed. The young man swept his eyes from the walls to the face of his lover. Levi looked relaxed more than ever and Eren wondered if he would be able to do what Isabel and Farlan could do to him someday—take off his worries and laugh like there was no tomorrow.

He felt a poke on the middle of his forehead, right between his eyebrows, and his thoughts derailed because of the action.

“Don’t do that,” Levi told him, giving him a scolding look but there were concern and love in it that they could almost melt Eren on the inside.

“Do what?” he whispered softly, vaguely aware that both of them had somehow ended up leaning close to each other as if desperate to erase the distance between the two of them until they were only a breath away.

“You seemed so far away and…” the rest of his words were swallowed by a yawn, and Eren didn’t bother to stifle his own because the tiredness was actually sinking into his eyes too.

“Let’s sleep?” he suggested, eyes were half-lidded and lips were almost brushing against his lover’s.

“Mhmm.”

Eren pulled away after pressing his lips quickly on Levi’s and he gently took his hand and led them away from the dining room and to the living room. He completely forgot that he was clueless about the turns and whatnot in the house. The older male let out a deep chuckle and he took that chance to slowly drag the brunet to the staircase located in the corridor between the dining room and the living room. There was a bathroom and then three rooms upstairs; Levi explained that they were his room, his parents’ room, and a guest room. They went to the last one in that little hallway and Levi twisted the knob of a white door to open it.

What greeted Eren was the smell of jasmines—simply pure, alluring, and exquisite. He took a step carefully inside, gazing at the open window with white curtains flowing with the breeze from outside. He then let his eyes finally wander to the interior of the room. The walls had color in them, unlike the white walls back at Levi’s big house, and they were soft blue. There was a mahogany dresser on the right side and on the other side was where a large, neat bed was placed. If he thought that the pictures in the dining room were _a lot_ , the photographs in Levi’s room could be hundreds, some were colored and some were old fashioned black-and-white. They were hanged with those little clippers in a line of thin rope, encircling the room starting from above the bed’s headboard.

“Your room is amazing,” he breathed out, beyond awestruck. Levi didn’t strike him as a sentimental type when they first met, but here he was, surrounded by pictures taken in different places, which he assumed were captured during the lawyer’s trips to different countries.

“Thank you,” Levi said from behind him.

They ended up sitting on the bed, and the reality that Levi had indirectly invited him to sleep on the same bed as him finally dawned on Eren. He sharply turned to look at the older with rose-tinged cheeks.

“I-Is it okay if I sleep with you here? I could take the guest—“

“This is fine, brat,” Levi told him before his hand shot up and grabbed Eren’s forearm with it, falling back on the soft bed sheets and thus dragging the younger with him.

“A-Aren’t you gonna take a shower?” he asked nervously. The response that he got was Levi wrapping his arms around him, tucking the green-eyed lad’s head under his chin. He began caressing those chestnut brown locks and the younger sighed contently.

“We can take one later.”

“You’ll fall asleep.”

“Mhm.”

They were silent for a while, enjoying the coolness that the sheets underneath had to offer them before they could warm them up. The cicadas from outside were incessantly chirping, and the moonlight provided some luminesce in the room.

“Levi?” Eren softly called out, voice was slightly muffled as he was pressed against the hard chest of his lover.

“Yeah?”

“Are you…Do you want to tell me something?” He was hesitant, yes. He couldn’t help but feel like he had to be careful, like he was going to be stepping on eggshells, because he _knew_. He knew was it was like to have something that could potentially bring out someone’s sensitivity, and he didn’t want for Levi to be anxious or troubled about anything. Not when their vacation had only started.

“Eren,” he slightly pulled away to gaze down on those teal eyes, which stared back at him in the dark. “What you do think of me?”

His eyes widened a bit before his eyebrows met together in the center, showing his confusion. But he smoothed down his expression and gathered all his gentleness and love to scoop Levi’s face in his hands.

“I think you’re wonderful. I think you’re best thing that happened to me, and everything about you—your flaws, your skills, your personality—they’re perfect,” he said with all the honesty. “That’s why, no matter who you were in the past, it will never change who you _are_ to me.”

He could have sworn that he heard Levi sniffle a bit, but before he could see the glistening light in those silver pools, the older male gently pushed him back to where he belonged. Right next to his heart.

The raven then began telling him his story.

“I was a screw-up after my parents died. I gave up in high school, and believe it or not, I actually repeated my last year. Because that last year, I got involved in some unpleasant circumstances—I fought worthless fights, put myself in detrimental situation, and almost…got lost in drugs. My uncle was only there if I needed anything and he had no clue that I got kicked out of school because he was too preoccupied with his goddamned job.

One day, I met Farlan and Isabel again after so many years. They found out about what happened to my parents and you know what they did?

They vandalized the wall under this bridge and they told me to go on a rampage if I have to. That was probably the worst advice you could give to some delinquent.”

He laughed and Eren joined in, loving the deep rumble that reverberated from this man—this once-broken man.

“We would steal for fun, going around the pier and taking advantage of the crowd of people. Sometimes we would be at the market and steal some fruits. We were a bunch of troublemakers back then, now that I think about it.”

“Uh, Erwin would’ve had whooped your asses if he knew you back then,” Eren retorted light-heartedly, which earned a snicker from the older male.

“Tell me about it. He would probably hang us upside down. And oh my God, Isabel would probably love that. That woman may be older than you are but she still acts like a freaking ten-year-old,” Levi remarked, letting some incredulity seep in his voice.

“She’s lovely. And definitely hyper, if not as much as Hanji,” Eren added the last part quickly.

“Mhm, true. I’m grateful to her and Farlan. If they didn’t let me do those things, let me release those frustrations and anger and anxieties in me, then I would’ve exploded and I should tell you that that wouldn’t be pretty if that ever happened. I could have hurt myself or worse, someone else. But I was able to take off that lid because of those two. I changed from that Levi who was blinded with anger and grief that was directed to the world to this me—this me who could see clearly what is right in front of me and could actually…actually love someone.”

Porcelain tears escaped from Eren’s eyes and he pushed himself upwards so that he was in the eye-level of Levi. He continued to gaze at him, memorizing every contours of his face, and he felt a soft touch on his cheek, gently wiping away those tears.

“That pain and experience you went through had made the person who you are right now. I love you, including your past, your present, and the future you. I told you, you _are_ my future, Levi.”

The grey-eyed man smiled the slightest to him before giving him a peck on his nose. “And you _are_ my future, Eren.”

“Then, you should probably hear my side of story then,” he proceeded. He told him everything; from the moment he woke up in the hospital, the news about his mother was delivered to him, to how he was pulled back to his old self thanks to his friends.

“I can’t imagine how much you went through.”

Green eyes softened and he said, “But that contributed to who I am right now, and I’m happy; I wouldn’t be me if those things never happened.”

“And you’re telling me that Erwin would whoop our asses; hell, he would probably castrate you or tie you on a lamppost,” Levi deadpanned.

Eren shuddered. “Stop it. I don’t wanna dream about bushy eyebrows.”

The older male smirked. “Oh, I’m telling you on Erwin.” Before the brunet could protest, he continued with solemnness, “But really, I’m glad that _it_ stopped. I’m glad that _you_ stopped; that _I_ stopped. We were really the embodiment of teenage anxieties and troubles back then, eh?”

“Yeah.” The younger snickered.

“Tsk, I wouldn’t have imagined you as a delinquent, brat. Fucking unbelievable.”

He looked at Levi and smiled oh-so-innocently. “A lawyer as a thug is more unbelievable,” he pointed out. The only response that he got was an eye-roll, which he laughed at.

Even after he finished telling his own tale to Levi, the couple didn’t stop exchanging sweet words and comfort to each other. Their eyes closed at the same time, limbs entangled together, heads close to each other, and arms wrapped with each other. The soft breeze from the open window continued to flow into the room, providing them the soothing coolness that balanced their warm bodies, and their breathing became even. And right before Eren’s consciousness had drifted away, he could’ve sworn that his short raven had said something.

_“I love you.”_

 

* * *

 

Sightseeing in a different country had always been one on the top list that Eren wanted to accomplish in this lifetime. And Lyon with its magnificent constructions and designs and just about everything made him so happy that he could fly or just hug the living heck out of Levi. Actually, that was the biggest understatement of the year for Eren. He realized that there were so much to do in Lyon and he started to doubt that few weeks of staying here would actually do the justice of thoroughly inspecting the city.

The brunet was glad that he didn’t forget to bring some of his art materials because going to Vieux Lyon was a must and he could feel that his next artwork would bud from that place. He took many photographs with his short-stack who was surprisingly compliant about his requests, and the feeling of giddiness grew in him at the thought that his face would be splattered on Levi’s walls. It made him feel like he was really becoming part of his lover’s life, like he would actually leave footprints on his wake and these pictures would be the constant reminder that he was indeed in Levi’s life, and that would apply to him as well.

For years, he only thought of living alone, but the day the raven walked into his life, everything suddenly changed. He found himself longing for someone’s company, be it Mikasa’s or Armin’s or his other friends’, and of course, the one he wanted to call the most was Levi. Levi who gave him a reason to become more alive, to actually _feel_ that he was alive, was now his anchor to this present he was living in. He couldn’t imagine the day he would be gone from his life or would want to imagine that. Not after everything, not after he sacrificed a lot already, and not when they finally accepted each other’s flaws and everything.

They stopped by to have lunch and during that time, Eren checked the photos that they had taken in Levi’s camera. He was grinning the entire time and the older man asked him where he wanted to go next.

“Mhm. You’re the tour guide, so tell me your recommendations.”

“I do have something in mind, but I think it will be already too late to actually go there now.”

“Tomorrow then?”

“Yeah. Let’s just look around some shops after this.”

 

* * *

 

They were exhausted to the point that after taking a shower, the two of them just passed out the second their bodies hit the bed. However, at the start of their third day, Eren was practically buzzing with energy because Levi had promised that he would _love_ the place that they were going to go but he had no inkling of where could it be because, well, he was a foreigner, duh.

And yes, he did love it. He loved Parc de la Tête d'Or and everything it had to offer. The botanical and the rose gardens were amazing, but forcing Levi to ride one of those mini boats almost sent him straight into the waters because of laughing way too much. He couldn’t help it; Levi was just damn cute! He actually fitted in the boat and Eren made sure to take _lots_ of picture, which would probably get him murdered by that certain short-stack of his. The raven promised revenge afterwards and before he could chuck the camera into the water, the brunet was fast into hugging it to his chest. He thought it was really hilarious to see that side of Levi, embarrassed and yet he still did what Eren asked of him (after several attempts that resulted into verbal smack down and jabs to some ribs). But nothing could possibly beat their next activity.

“Oh, my God.” Eren was doubling in laughter, almost falling off the mini horse as the merry-go-round spun slowly.

Levi was pale as fuck. Like he totally couldn’t believe that he was actually acquiescing to this whole ludicrous idea just because he didn’t have the power to actually resist those goddamned beautiful Caribbean eyes.

“I swear, brat, I’m going to chop you off to pieces,” he gritted out, staring at the golden mast that was connecting his own pony to the whole machinery of the damn carousel.

Eren could’ve sworn that if he didn’t stop laughing right there and then, then he would actually have a heart attack. But it was just too much!

The notorious Levi Ackerman, the man that everyone in the law firm respected and admired, the man who made Eren cry with just a simple glare, the man who could be anal about pristineness and orderliness, was actually riding a little pony in this oh-so-fascinating of a carousel.

Levi snapped his head towards him and his grey eyes narrowed into a feral look, and if Eren hadn’t known the older for months, he would be shitting his pants right now. He immediately hid his phone after ensuring that the photo was saved into his camera roll. He yelped when he felt himself flying to one side, and thank God for his fast reflexes or else his head would have been smashed onto the hard ground. That wouldn’t be pretty.

“What?!” He asked in a surprised tone, practically hugging the mast.

“Delete that, you little shit.”

Eren merely grinned, not affected by how pissed Levi sounded, and he merely pushed himself to Levi who was grumpily settled on his own horse as the tinkling music of the ride resounded in the background.

“It’s for like a keepsake,” he reasoned out, staring directly to Levi and not caring that only one cheek of his arse was on his own horse.

Levi’s eyebrows were scrunched together as if he was in deep thought; no doubt, he was on the verge of giving up but his grip on Eren’s white shirt was still there.

“We can make copies and put this on your Wall of Memories.” That was the final push and he could tell by how Levi’s eyes flicked back to him that the man was ready to say ‘fine.’ Eren didn’t know when did he figure out Levi this much to the point that he could actually predict him most of the time, and it wouldn’t be surprising if his boyfriend knew him inside-out already.

“Wall of Memories?” Levi asked as his expression shifted to a more of an amused one. “Since when did you name _my_ wall?”

“Since the day I realized how much it will look better with my face on it.” He grinned.

The raven huffed out a chuckle and then he gave a final pull so that the younger was cheek-on-cheek with him, restraining himself not to completely fall off his horse, which was really impossible but Levi met him halfway.

“Say cheese,” Levi said monotonously and without warning, and the next thing Eren knew, his lover’s own camera had already flashed before them.

And that became the favorite picture Eren and Levi had taken together.

 

* * *

 

Two weeks had passed like sand in an hourglass, and Eren would always groan first thing he woke up, counting the days that they had left in France.

The couple fell into a routine the past weeks and they didn’t think that they could be this happy to the point that Eren totally forgot to call Mikasa or Armin the first week, and he was glad that his friends didn’t kill his eardrums the second he pressed the ‘call’ button.

Isabel and Farlan visited them almost everyday, as if they didn’t have job to do but they did. Isabel was actually a fashion designer and Eren didn’t doubt that because she might be eccentric but her unique style about everything just screamed that she was born to do her job. On the other hand, Farlan was a project manager and his jaw dropped when the man showed him his architectural designs for some buildings. He was an art student, not really an expert on that stuff, but he could definitely tell by his related knowledge that the designs were good—like fan _fucking_ tastic. Even Levi was impressed, and that was saying _a lot_. And when it was his turn to display some of his talents, he showed them the _Jiyuu no Tsubasa_ , in which both of the grown adults had openly gawked at.

“Holy shit, that is fucking amazing,” Isabel exclaimed, clearly awestruck.

“Language, you knucklehead,” Levi chided.

“Oh damn. Eren, I could actually ask you right now if you’d be willing to contribute to my projects because this is fantastic. Like fucking awesome, man,” Farlan said with a beam.

A sigh came from the lawyer. “Of course, you’d be doing what I just told Isabel not to do.”

Both of his friends gave him mischievous grins and they said in unison, “Go cook, Levi.”

“Fuck you,” the raven retorted before he went to the kitchen and Eren couldn’t help but smile at this close relationship that the three of them had.

“Language, Levi,” the two of them reprimanded in a singsong voice.

Out of the blue, there was something white that flew in the air and before any of them could react, Isabel’s face was already hidden behind a plate that was stuck on her face. It only lasted a second because the paper plate slid off her face and the icing was now splattered on her face.

Oh, shit, Levi did not just…

And soon, the redhead was running to the kitchen down to the fridge where she rummaged the contents to find the damn whip cream. Eren watched as Levi ran from the kitchen straight to the living room with a suspicious looking can in his hand that could only be the whip cream that Isabel was looking for. He couldn’t help but raise an amused eyebrow at the scene that was unfolding before him. He grabbed his camera, carefully dodging the _grown_ _adults_ chasing after each other with Eren remaining on the sideline and with Levi protecting him.

Before he knew it, the dining room became the landmark of a very _icing_ disaster.

And Levi would _definitely_ become the Satan later when he sees the aftermath…

 

* * *

 

“Hey, Levi.”

“Mhm?”

Eren pulled himself up from the bed, gazing at the man whose back was turned from him. His boyfriend was in front of his laptop, papers were strewn about on his desk he was wearing reading glasses. He deemed it to be a little ridiculous to actually become excited for seeing another look of Levi, but he couldn’t help it.

He walked towards him and peeked at his work. He knew that the lawyer would be bringing his work here (heck, he was the one who suggested it), but there had been something that was on his mind since long ago. He was about to open his mouth to say something but stopped himself because he knew that he would be distracting Levi from his work, and he disliked thinking that he could be a burden to his boyfriend.

He was about to turn back to the bed, where they had spend nights just cuddling and talking to each other, but Levi’s hand shot up and he held Eren’s wrist.

“What is it?” he asked him ever so softly, and it stirred something in him. He wanted to say that he missed him already even though they hadn’t talked to each other for just a couple of hours. He wanted to hug him and cuddle with him already because he wanted to feel that warmth he provided every night to him. He wanted to go him and kiss him because he couldn’t thank him enough for the wonderful trip that he gave him. This vacation had been nothing but an amazing dream came true and he wondered if he would be able to travel again with Levi in a different country. All these he wanted to do and say but he restrained himself.

“Nothing. Just wondering if you’re going to sleep soon,” he lied. He knew that he was like an open book to the older but he couldn’t help it. He didn’t want to bother him or make Levi feel like he had to do everything that Eren wanted, even though that was what he had been doing since the start of the trip. And now that everything was ending, Eren felt an even stronger force that was making him want to stay with Levi at all times.

“The tips of your ears are red,” he simply told him. Eren’s face burned next and he heard the telltale sound of a shutting sound and before he could register what was happening, he toppled backwards on the soft mattress.

“Are you lonely, Eren?” Levi asked. His hot breath was against the young man’s ears and he resisted the urge to shudder. His chest was pressed against Levi’s and he could feel the heat emanating from both of their bodies. That pale, smooth face was just an inch away from him but he held himself back.

“You still have work to do, you know,” he reminded him. He really didn’t want his lover to spend sleepless nights after this vacation because of the piled up work that he had to take care of.

“We’re leaving soon,” Levi said.

“…Yeah.” He couldn’t help the sadness that seeped into his voice and the grey-eyed man had detected it.

“We can stay here longer if you want.”

“No,” he immediately answered, shaking his head. “I’ve had the most wonderful vacation in my life, Levi. I don’t need you sacrificing your work and besides, Mikasa and Armin want to hang out when we come back. They are demanding some souvenirs, too.” He chuckled.

“Okay. Then, we’ll create more plans before you go back to college.”

“Actually, I’m thinking if...” he trailed off, a sheepish smile on his face.

“What…? Are you—? You’re gonna stop college? Why?” Levi asked, pure curiosity presented in his tone.

“Because I want to focus more on making art pieces that I can sell. Mr. Pixis told me that I can land a job somewhere as a designer because I have experience with graphics and I can make painting and the other things as side-jobs,” the younger explained.

Levi looked thoughtfully a bit before saying, “Then, accept Farlan’s offer. Their company has a branch in New York, if I’m not wrong.”

“Yeah, I’ll definitely think about it.” There was a pause before Eren asked, “Is there something you want to do before we leave?” He left the underlying meaning unspoken because he knew that since this was Levi’s hometown, then he had most likely planned to drop by somewhere.

Levi looked at him and gave him a small smile. “I want to visit my parents’ grave tomorrow.”

Eren’s eyes softened and he lifted a hand to caress his lover’s cheek. “Can I come with you?”

“Hmm. Yeah, of course. I plan to introduce you to them, too, you know.”

“Okay.” The brunet leaned in to give a chaste kiss on those lips right before him. He got a gentle one in return and he smiled. Before he could enjoy it any further, Levi suddenly pulled away.

“What were you going to ask me earlier, brat?”

The younger looked away, slightly blushing and he let his hand fall on the bed. He responded, “Never mind. It’s nothing.”

He felt his face being carefully turned forward again and he faced Levi with hesitancy. Eren knew that Levi could be pretty nagging if he wanted to, and he would without a doubt get the truth out of Eren if he knew that it was bothering him.

“Tell me, Eren,” Levi said gently. Eren wondered if this man could get any more loving than this; he was always concerned about him and he prioritized him above everything else, and Eren could think of nothing else to give him. He wanted to tell him how much he loved him but if he said it too many times, he felt like those words would lose its meaning. But it didn’t erase the fact that those words were indeed troubling him a bit.

He couldn’t help but wonder why hadn’t Levi said those three words yet.

“I…”

“Mhm?” The raven urged him on.

“Do you love me, Levi?”

He felt like the air suddenly stopped moving, like everything just screeched into a halt, and he felt his heart pound against his chest, filling in the deafening silence that was threatening to choke him down. Oh, God. He shouldn’t have asked, and yet he couldn’t tear his eyes away from the man that gave him the chance to love again—from the man that he sacrificed his past for.

The older male finally opened his lips, and what he said next were probably the sweetest and most loving words that he’d heard in five years.

“I don’t think there are any words that could describe my feelings for you, Eren. I feel like I’m drowning in this—this ecstatic feeling whenever I’m with you. As fucking cliché as this will sound like, I actually saw colors when I first saw you. It started with the moment I saw your bright eyes, shining their way into my life until I could only see nothing but them in my dreams and whenever I close my eyes. Then, your presence practically gave out rainbow colors that should’ve been shitty and I should’ve hated, but I actually longed for it, _loved every second_ of you by my side. All was black-and-white before you, and now that you’re here, making my heart beat like I’m going to have a fucking heart attack, I don’t think I can go back to who I was.”

“Then, don’t. You’re you, and I’m just me. I love you, Levi. I love you…” The rest of his words were choked down by his tears and were taken from him as Levi’s lips descended upon his firmly.

Their kiss turned fierce, became open-mouthed and exploring, and fiery touches trailed on both of their bodies. Articles of clothing slipped off them, not letting the other get away even just for a second. It was as if they could almost hear and feel their hearts and bodies protesting when they lost contact, and then they would beat in the rhythm that they found. Marks were placed on their skin, as if to say that they belonged to each other. And they did, even before this very moment; they knew that they held their hearts to each other and they both accepted what the other had to offer.

All but that _one_ secret.

Levi pulled back slightly, away from the crook of Eren’s neck. Eyes were dilated with want and love, seeking for a particular answer.

He asked, “Are you sure that you want this, Eren?”

The brunet had tears in his eyes, smiling at the man who was about to give him the best thing that he could ask for. To become one with him, the man that he’d ever loved this deeply. Levi still prioritized what his feelings, even up to this moment, and his chest grew with warmth.

“I want you, Levi. I want every part of you, and I want to feel that I truly belong to you.”

And that was all Levi needed to hear as he proceeded to give Eren, his beloved, his everything—love, pleasure, and chastity. And in return, Eren reciprocated the things that Levi gave him.

The bed creaked and rattled on the wall, moans and sweet words echoed in the room, and the faint smell of jasmine was still there—and these senses took them to heights with the moonlight shining in the night.

Finally becoming whole and complete brought them the sense of falling deeper for each other. _They fall apart and come together with a string that line their hearts next to each other with each beat that says_ I’ll never let go of you.

 

* * *

 

“Mom, Dad, I’m here.”

Levi was kneeling on one knee in front of a white tombstone, laying a bundle of white jasmines on the cemented ground. The area surrounding it were all green grass with no rustling fallen leaves and Eren knew that Levi had probably asked someone to always clean the place. The sun was beating down on their backs but neither of them cared because they were too immersed to their own thoughts.

“I’m here with someone,” he started. A warm breeze passed by, swaying their dark locks along with it and caressing their faces, and Eren took this moment to crouch next to Levi and gaze upon the words that dictated the names of his parents. “His name is Eren.” Levi took his hand, not really looking at him but it made the brunet shift his eyes towards the man.

“He’s the person that I want to be with, _always and forever_ want to be with.”

Eren bit his bottom lip, refusing to let the tears escape because he wanted to give out a nice impression to Levi’s parents. Instead, he let out his usual big smile with teary eyes and faced the husband and wife right in front of him.

“Hello, Levi’s Mom and Dad. I’m Eren, Eren Jaeger. I’m dating your son, and yes, he’s stubborn and grumpy like most of the time,” he said cheekily, earning a light playful glare from the raven next to him. He continued, “But I love him. He was the one who broke the walls that I built around me, and it was all thanks to him that I could trust someone now. He gave me reason to face my present and my possible future no matter how scary it is.” He paused and directly looked onto those grey eyes. “And he was the one who taught me that a great love conquers all.”

“Eren…”

He smiled at Levi then turned his head to those jasmines. “I don’t want to let go of your son, which is why I’m asking you to give us strength to conquer our fears. I want to be with him, _always and forever_. I wish to ask for your blessings,” he said ever so softly and another breeze whistled by, carrying his words up to the clouds in the bright blue sky.

Levi looked up at the same time with Eren, and a peaceful smile settled on both of their faces.

Levi mouthed, “Thank you Papa, Maman.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, this story has a higher rating but truthfully, as you can see, it's not in THIS chapter :P Whoops. Thank you for reading and for the kudos and comments! Love y'all!


	18. The Beginning and The End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think a no-summary chapter will be good for now... I don't wanna give anything away. Whoops. I'm sorry if there's like mistakes (I've only got to read it twice D:) But at least I actually remembered that it's Thursday today XD Thanks for the kudos and comments, everyone!

**I don’t own SnK**

* * *

 

_“Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up.”_

_-Neil Gaiman_

* * *

 

**~Chapter Eighteen: The Beginning and the End~**

           

Post-France was a mix of both content and disappointment; Eren was happy that he got to see the Eiffel Tower with Levi the last day and when they got to Paris, he had the urge to actually explore the rich city but he wasn’t able to. He was right, weeks didn’t cut it; he needed months to stay there. Levi was looking fresh after that vacation and Eren would always turn red whenever he thought of the possibilities as to what could bring the grumpy lawyer into a good mood.

“Oooohh _~ Something_ happened in France~” Hanji all but sang to them. It never failed to make Eren go red.

It didn’t help that his overprotective sister/best friend/child hood friend that went by the name Mikasa Ackerman had practically grilled him the very next day after he came back.

“That Shortie didn’t cross the line, did he, Eren?” she asked him very sinisterly and the brunet went a bit pale because he knew what the dark-haired woman was capable of. After all, Mikasa was sort of the feminine hero who rose back in high school after she sent one guy (who was picking a fight with Eren) to the nurse’s office with a bloody nose. No one dared to mess with her or with Eren (at least when she wasn’t there) anymore after that. Even Jean would piss his pants if she were to send one glare to his direction back then.

“Mikasa! You know Levi, and you know that he’s decently rational,” he told her fervently. Though, his own request to the said man the night before they left France couldn’t be really “decently rational” in the eyes of many people, but he was happy and he didn’t regret anything. And that was all that mattered, really.

Mikasa merely sighed as if she was fed up with her futile warnings to Eren because they seemed to just bounce off his head. She then muttered, “France is the place for lovesick fools like you two. Just use protection, okay?”

Oh, my God. He thought he couldn’t get any redder when Hanji had already taken up the job of the constant suggestive teasing, but when the subject was brought up by Mikasa, Eren was sure that he was going to explode in embarrassment and mortification. She was like his sister for Pete’s sake! Discussing his sexual matters with her or anyone he deemed a family member was awkward as hell, and was now making him wish that a black hole could just magically open up and swallow him whole.

Eren averted his eyes from her, hiding his flushed face behind his cup of caramel Frappuccino and grumbling, “ _Please,_ spare me the lecture.”

Mikasa complied anyway but not before sending him a smirk and saying, “About time you got laid.”

That just made Eren want to actually jump to the next car that was passing by on the road. He sunk on his seat, cringing at how his sweat was sticking on his body because it was hot—like _what the hell, it’s so freaking hot_ —and the shade that the small umbrella attached to their table looming over their heads was definitely not working. The busy people walking by or rushing out of the little café weren’t helping either; instead, the business suits that some of them had were only making Eren feel hotter than necessary.

“You’re making it sound as if I haven’t done anything before!”

Mikasa snorted. “You _were_ a virgin before France.”

Eren spluttered, “ _W-What?!_ How do you even know _that_?!”

“Jean runs his mouth, you know him. Even though you two were together for like what, seven months? He said that you’ve never breached the third base. Wow, platonic much?” Mikasa stated, bemused.

“Ugh. Can we stop talking about my sex life here?” Eren rolled his eyes, slumping in a heap on the table. His forehead touched the cool surface of the glass table and he sighed blissfully.

“Last time I checked, you never had one until Levi Ackerman,” she retorted.

“Oh, God. Stop,” Eren whined, facing the road so that his left cheek was on the table.

“Surprisingly, my parents approve of him.”

He lifted his face slightly to narrow his eyes on her and dumbly uttered, “They _know_?”

“Uh huh.”

The brunet knocked his forehead on the hard surface again and whined, “Why _yyy_? Oh, my God. Does everyone know?”

Mikasa had a playful smile on her face, as she said, “Not everyone, but probably _all_ the people that know you.”

“Thanks (he rolled his eyes), that really makes me feel _a lot_ _better_ ,” he said. His best friend across from him might have had noticed his voice dripping sarcasm but she simply shrugged it off and sipped her own Frap.

“By the way, are you serious about stopping college?” she asked him, now concerned with a whole different topic that Eren didn’t really want to go to.

“Well, I’ve been planning to work as an illustrator or a designer for some time now and I think this is a perfect opportunity for me, you know. And Levi has a friend who can land me on a job in the future; I’ll be working with architectural designs,” he said to her, now grinning. It made Mikasa smile too and she gazed on the street across from them, the sun beating down on the pavement and it made her wonder if it was possible to catch something on fire with this a hundred-degree weather.

“That’s good.”

Eren straightened up and finished his drink, taking in the sight of Mikasa turning away from him and seemingly far away. He was glad that things between them were okay now, as if there was really nothing to worry about—like tense atmosphere or awkward avoidance of a _certain_ subject—in the first place. He knew that she was a very understanding person and that she could come by when he needed help. She had helped him in many ways possible, and Eren couldn’t be any more grateful to have a friend like her. Moments like this made him appreciate more of what he had, and what he could have in the future. And he didn’t regret his decision of letting go of the past…

…Not yet.

 

* * *

 

Eren didn’t know how the hell did time just pass by in a blink of an eye, and he could now testify to the saying “time flies when you’re having fun.”

This summer had been exceptional for him because he had done almost everything that a normal guy like him would do over this kind of vacation. He went to this huge park with Armin and some of his friends to go biking and have a small picnic, and then the whole gang went to a water theme amusement park, which somehow ended up with Connie sporting a bruised face because Sasha had miraculously flipped them upside down while sliding down this tube—that was funny as hell and Reiner and Jean wouldn’t stop laughing even in the car ride heading back home. What was astonishingly frightening about that certain hangout was the fact that Levi and his own friends, Hanji, Erwin and some other people he was introduced to, had actually came with them. Like, _uh what is a group of grownup adults doing in this kind of place?_ Nonetheless, the two big groups colliding together was definitely a sight to see. Many children and teenagers had stopped and stare at them but they completely went along with it when they found out just how _crazy_ and _fun_ (two descriptions that _shouldn’t_ really go together, but they always did) the bunch of them was.

He never knew that he would describe Erwin Smith as _fun_ until that day; and he still could remember how his level of respect kinda crumbled into pieces the second he saw the blonde in a freaking rainbow _speedo_. Levi had turned into a devil and slapped some black short trunks on him before the once-intimidating-man jumped into the water tube.

And Eren couldn’t—and wouldn’t—forget how cheesy Levi became. He even took him on a date at the same amusement park they had first met. The brunet was grinning the whole day and it was _goddamned_ idiotic-looking but the infectious smile didn’t stop from infecting Levi. Oh, the two of them were truly a sight to behold. Just one season ago, people were staring at Eren who was crying because of a stranger (which was really just _partially_ true, but still…) but on that one date, they were staring at the couple because they really did look like lovesick fools. Oh, what a turn of events that was.

The young man didn’t stop taking pictures either and he couldn’t stop laughing at this one certain picture when Levi looked scared as hell when both of them went down on this waterslide. There was another one that he bought at their date at the park and he was thankful that he did because the looks on their faces as the roller coaster dropped down from above were priceless. Never had he ever imagined Levi’s eyes go wide like he just saw his house flipped a hundred eighty degrees, or the fact that Eren himself had opened his mouth so big he could fit the head of the person in front of him in the ride. Uh, totally _priceless._ The raven threatened to burn those pictures but Eren was quick to save it in his flash-drive. It was also his idea to turn Levi’s house similar to that one in Lyon; he literally renovated his room by moving stuff across from the other ends so that he had space to maneuver around as he clipped pictures encircling the room.

“Mmm, not bad,” Levi had said one evening when Eren was completely done with his work. That might not sound like a huge compliment but it was Levi, and that was a lot coming from that short-stack.

It was weird how Eren got used to Levi’s house to the point that he could see his own belongings in parts of the place, like his toothbrush in the bathroom had unceremoniously popped out next to Levi’s (well, he might have ended up placing it there because the older male had complained about his morning breath once or twice…). Some of his shirts were also put inside the drawer in the bedroom, which was a good thing, really, because he got to see his boyfriend in his paint-smudged shirts in several mornings. The downside (he really couldn’t decide if it was a downside or not) of it was the fact that Levi’s cuteness level would overload and would sometimes leave Eren’s mind fried. Those blushes and small smiles should be illegal.

“Levi seems more…light? Refreshed? Like, _what_ _the hell_ did you do, Eren Jaeger?” Erwin asked incredulously one night when he and Hanji dropped by Levi’s house without announcement. It pissed off the raven to no end and Eren could tell because he was _slightly_ feeling the same at that moment…not like they were doing anything before they arrived. Nope, not at all.

“ _Duh_ , Eren captured Levi’s heart in one go,” Hanji answered for them. It made the certain lawyer twitch and the poor brunet blush, something that he was afraid would actually be permanent because turning red shouldn’t be _this_ frequent. However, he also knew that there was really no end to this if Hanji wouldn’t stop teasing them, which probably would _never_ happen in this lifetime.

And the fact that Levi actually replied to that comment made him swivel towards the raven. He said, “It was the other way ‘round, dumbass.”

The brunet wondered if the three adults were there to make him implode because, they were just too much!

But there was also the fact that he didn’t deny it—that his heart was truly captured by Levi. And Eren didn’t need for him to say that he had also captured Levi’s heart out loud. After all, for Levi, telling Hanji that she was right was like selling his soul to hell.

_Ah, such good friends._

* * *

“Wha—Ow!” Eren yelped as he felt the shock of pain on the skin of his wrist. The coffee dripped down his hand and he mentally slapped himself because _wow, great going, Jaeger._

“What the hell are you doing, brat?” He heard Levi grumble and he felt cool fingertips on his wrists before a hand started wiping the liquid off his skin with a napkin.

“Sorry, sorry,” he apologized sheepishly. He helped his boyfriend by taking the napkins from him and wiping himself off the coffee and oh god, he would stink like caffeine-booze now.

Petra happened to pass by and asked if Levi needed a custodian to clean up the mess and he told her that they could just do it later. Eren, nonetheless, settled with mopping the floor with a makeshift rag produced by piles of napkins that were conveniently on the table in front of him. He was glad that he didn’t get any on his shirt or on the couch because the workers in the law firm would probably not appreciate that.

“See you later, Eren!” Petra waved goodbye and the brunet sent one of his own before turning his body completely to Levi.

“What the _heck_ did you just say earlier?” he asked, voice rising a pitch higher.

“My uncle wants to see me, some bonding bullshit, and I’m wondering if you’re comfortable coming with me before we go to our dinner,” Levi calmly explained to him once more. But none of that registered to Eren because his brain was too busy replaying the words “I’ll get to see Levi’s uncle. Oh God.” He wasn’t a fan of meet-the-parents—or meet-the-uncle in his lover’s case—because he knew how passive-aggressively Mikasa had reacted at first when she officially met Levi as his lover; the woman had claimed that the wine Levi brought one evening at their house was poisoned by feigning to faint. Eren could still remember how Levi’s already-pale face became paler (if that was even possible) as if he just witnessed a grandma have a heart attack—but Mikasa was neither a grandma nor having a heart attack. When she saw the shorter man’s reaction though, she almost died laughing and Eren almost choked her because that wasn’t _funny_. Okay, maybe he did laugh a bit afterwards. But the point was, he didn’t like confrontations! It took a couple of attempts before he could find closures and get Levi to ask him out and tell him about himself and about the incident that should be forgotten now, and meeting Levi’s only family member (that Levi actually knew and hadn’t met accidentally somewhere) was more than nerve-wracking.

“—Are you listening, brat?” Levi sounded a bit impatient but more curious as to where Eren’s soul had gone off to this time.

“Err… What’s your uncle’s name again?” he asked, dodging the question completely and he was glad that Levi didn’t notice.

“Kenny. Kenny Ackerman,” he said.

There was something strangely familiar about the name and he wondered what could it be because he knew that it would bother him later on. But there was a more significant question: Was he ready to do this meet-the-uncle thing? Sure, he had met Levi’s parents but Kenny Ackerman (ugh, he could have sworn he’d seen the name on an article somewhere), based on Levi’s stories, wasn’t really the perfect guardian. He was just… _there_. But Levi seemed to regard him with some degree of respect so maybe the man wasn’t that bad.

“And you want me to go with you and meet him?” he asked unsurely. He earned an eye roll from the raven and he would’ve have countered back if not for the fact that he was genuinely nervous.

“You don’t have to. It was just a suggestion. He just wants to see me for like half an hour then we’ll go. It’s probably just the usual casual talk, don’t worry,” Levi reassured him.

Eren felt like he was obligated to go but for the most part, he wanted to. He wanted to see the person who had raised Levi during the absence of his parents. He wanted to know what kind of a person this man was to actually give more attention to his job than to the teenager that was wrecking his life back in that ivory house. He wanted to get to know that piece of Levi’s life. He wanted to know who Kenny Ackerman was.

“No, I’ll go. I met your parents, you met mine—my second family, that is—so I want to meet your uncle then,” he told him with a smile.

Levi’s eyebrows scrunched a bit. “Are you sure?”

He nodded and he said, “By the way, are you free tomorrow?”

“Mmm, yeah. Why?”

His green eyes softly gazed at those silver pools before he told him, “I want to formally introduce you to my parents.” Eren knew that that would be a big step for him. He visited their grave every chance he got and he hadn’t taken Levi there yet because he wanted to make sure that they were both ready—that Eren was ready to show him the last and important part of his life and that Levi would not turn away from him, something that he deemed to be royally ridiculous. But when you loved someone that deeply, all fears would show themselves and would threaten to conquer that love. But Eren would not let that happen, not even until his last breath.

 

* * *

 

_“So what? Like you’re having a mental meltdown because you’re meeting his uncle? Big shit, Eren. Calm down.”_

Wow, leave to Jean to become a dick when he needed it the most.

“Thanks a lot, horseface.”

_“You’re welcome, Jaegerbombastic. But seriously, dude, you met my parents before and did they eat you? No.”_

“Why did I even call you again?”

_“Because you thought of calling Armin but he’s currently unavailable because he’s preoccupied with Annie, and Mikasa is hanging out with her college friends at the moment. Which leaves me to entertain and give you some insight, your royal highness.”_

“Then how about doing your job properly while you’re on it?” he hissed on the phone.

He truly hated how Jean Kirstein seemed to know everything about him, which was actually not a lie considering that they were friends since high school before becoming lovers and then becoming friends again _. An asshole friend he is._

_“I’m starting to think that this has less something to do with the meet-the-uncle than it has relation to how painfully obvious it was that you were hiding something months ago.”_

Well, that definitely caught Eren off-guard. He stared at the high ceiling of the lobby and frowned. He was right; Jean could somehow read him too. Or maybe Armin or Mikasa had talked to him about this because those two were as good as Levi.

“What do you mean?”

_“Don’t even try to hide it. As much as it makes me want to cringe, I’m studying law like that Shortie and I know you, Eren. Remember the time when you cut class back in high school? You avoided Mikasa for three days because you knew that you were a bad liar—and you still are—and that she would find out. I’m not prying, but I’m just laying off my shitty persona and just decided to become your concerned friend just this one moment.”_

Okay, maybe Jean wasn’t exactly the asshole friend he thought he was. The guy had a pride as big as the Mt. Everest but he would cast that aside if needed, which still made him wonder if that was all it took for him to break up with Eren but he would not linger on that thought because he was perfectly content with what he had right now.

“Do you know Rod Reiss?” The question was out of his mouth before he could even stop it and he snapped it shut before his mind worked a hundred miles per second, opening his mouth again to take it all back. No. Didn’t he already let go of this? Why was he asking this to Jean, of all people?

_“Are you talking about Good Samaritan?”_ The epithet almost made him puke.

He didn’t answer that but he voiced out another question, something that had been bothering him for a while now ever since he had heard the name. “How about Kenny… Ackerman?”

_“What is this? Celebrity quiz? But fine. I’m not sure about the surname but I believe that Kenny is the vice president of the Reiss Corporation, if we’re thinking about the same Kenny. Rod Reiss mentioned something about the reliable right-hand man of his in one of his interviews—”_

Eren felt like his throat suddenly snapped in half because he couldn’t find the ability to talk. _No, it can’t be. That’s just purely incidental. Levi would’ve mentioned something…unless he also doesn’t know about it. No. No. No. Jean said that he’s not sure about the last name, either. Calm down, there are many Kenny’s out there._

He wasn’t sure for how long had he been trapped in his own thoughts until he heard that voice from the other end of the line.

_“Eren? Eren, are you still there? Answer me, dumbass.”_

“Y-Yeah. Uh, I gotta go. Thanks for the time, horseface.”

_“I shouldn’t be saying this, but sure, anytime, Jaegerbombastic. Ugh, that nickname is goddamn long. Connie should’ve thought of something else.”_

“Pfft. Bye, Jean.”

_“Mmm. Later, Eren.”_

He put his phone down on his lap and stared at the people filtering in and out of the building. He shouldn’t have asked, because he wouldn’t be looking at his lap right now, wondering if he could fake some stomachache when Levi finally gets off work. No, that wouldn’t be right. It was his own choice to ask and he did get an answer. An answer that he truly disliked.

An answer that could potentially be as dangerous as a timed-bomb.

 

* * *

 

“You can just stay in the car,” Levi told him for the umpteenth time.

Eren shifted in his seat to remove the seatbelt as Levi killed the engine of the car. The brunet turned to him and leaned forward to give him a kiss on the corner of the raven’s lips.

“He’s still your family, isn’t he? That’s why I want to meet him, unless you don’t want to…”

Levi sighed and ruffled his chestnut brown hair, which he pouted at because he spent almost an hour taming it. He told Eren, “You have no idea how much I want to show you off to the fucking world. So let’s go. Though, if anything weird happens, I’ll haul you out of the restaurant and fucking punch Kenny in the face, even if he’s my uncle.”

“Don’t say that! He’s still older than you!” Eren chided him as if he was a child and Levi simply rolled his eyes.

“I don’t even know how he’s been doing after I left France. I just know that he’s working for a company and he looks damn successful,” Levi told him. It made Eren’s heart rate quicken a bit but he soothed himself off his worries by intertwining his fingers with his lover’s.

“Then, maybe, you should get to know him?” he suggested, sounding not entirely certain.

Levi crinkled his nose as if he just smelled something horrendous before replying, “We’ll see, brat. We’ll see.”

Both of them got out of the silver car and Levi guided him to this French restaurant (oh, who would’ve guessed). The dimmed lights inside reminded him of the first dinner he had with Levi and that was last April, and now they were approaching September. Two seasons would already go by since the day that the two of them had first met each other.

The host smiled kindly to them and his lithe stature was in front of them as he led them to a certain table at the back of the restaurant next to the windows. There was something nice about the area as the lights from outside illuminated the inside, only slightly, really. They approached the table and Eren suddenly became painfully aware of the hammering inside his ribcage. His palms were starting to get clammy cold, even though he was absolutely sure that the restaurant was air-conditioned and the air wasn’t humid.

“Uncle,” Levi called out monotonously.

The man who was at the table with his back turned twitched ever so slightly that Eren wouldn’t have noticed it if not for the fact that his eyes were engaged into willing the mysterious uncle to turn around. He was wearing a black bowler hat with a matching black suit, Eren could tell from where he was, and his hands that were holding the menu were adorned with rings that looked expensive with the first look. There was also a watch…

A silver watch.

Eren’s mind went reeling at the familiar sight. _No, wait. Why is this familiar?_

Then, the said man turned around.

Kenny Ackerman faced them—and Eren’s eyes widened.

_No…_

_No._

_“My job here is done.”_

Those words echoed in his head like a broken answering machine. He felt like the ground beneath his feet suddenly opened up and now he was falling into an unknown abyss helplessly. And before he could claw his way back to the surface, his body was pulled down with the shadows that had instead clawed him from inside out.

Levi was nowhere in sight.

But there was someone within his field of vision.

_“MOM!”_

_Red. Red. Red._

_That was the only thing he saw as his head lolled back to the side on the dashboard as if he was in no control of his own body and the color red had blinded him, filling the space in his eyelids and around his eyes. He lifted his hand and he only saw red._

_Blood. Blood. Blood._

_It was everywhere. On his hand, on the dashboard, on_ her _._

_On his mom._

_“Please, mom,” he sobbed out, reaching a hand towards the woman whose head was lying on the steering wheel. The warm liquid was oozing out somewhere from her head and it was sticking to her hair, on her skin, and on her face—Oh, that face. It was the same face that he would see everyday and he could point it out in the midst of a crowd. It was the same loving face that would smile up at him, saying those words that belonged to that language of parental love. It was the same face that faced him head-on and never failed to encourage him ever since his father passed away and left the two of them. But now, the same face was erased of any emotions; there was only blood plastered on it and Eren thought of how much it marred the image of his mother without truly disfiguring it._

_His eyes glided to the side of the car and tears ran down the side of his face, and he still couldn’t damn move. He looked incredulously at the crumpled metal, the door of the car was forced to twist, and that was the first sign that his mom had taken all the damage. He was oblivious to the fact that he was bleeding but the second indication of his own injuries was the blurriness of his own eyes, then his vision started to darken around the edges. Fear gripped his heart at the thought that the darkness would swallow him whole and he wouldn’t be able to see his mom again._

_His arm in the air suddenly dropped and clanked against the gear stick. He felt like there was something heavy pressing down on his lungs and all the air around him turned into nothingness because he could_ not _breathe. A painful throbbing was left inside of him and his tears continued to roll down the dashboard. The image of his mom seemed so far away now and he lost his voice to scream and pull her to him and hug her—_

_He must have had passed out and somewhere at the back of his head, he knew that he should be hearing the wailing and dreading sounds of the sirens by now. But he heard none. Except from a shuffle and the hiss of something smoking—of something simmering. His head was still pressed down on something hard and there was something sticky and utterly horrifying about it. He ignored the thought that maybe he shouldn’t be feeling anything—least, be having all his senses back to him—and he realized that he had to open his eyes._

_There were footsteps and a hope bloomed in his chest. He knew that he had to say something to the person who miraculously manifested himself at a time where he needed him the most, but it was hard to peel his eyelids off his skin—the feeling of his eyelashes being plucked one by one almost made him cringe. Then, when he managed to crack one eye open, he saw a shadow looming over the figure lying next to him from the shattered windshield._

_His chest tightened when he realized that it was really his mom._

_He opened his lips to call for help, but it was utterly useless because his voice box must have been damaged if it could only make croaking sounds. But that was a lie. The fear was paralyzing him, deeming him useless and helpless._

_Then he saw him. He saw a dark-haired man in his late 30’s or early 40’s but he didn’t want to bother with the details. Though, the sight of a silver watch latched on his wrist had caught Eren’s eye because the light from outside bounced off the material. The fact that there was someone there, right_ there _, by his mom’s side meant that they could get help._

Please help my mom.

_He wanted to shout and plead, but his body wasn’t cooperating. His left eye was even threatening to close but he willed it to remain open. But what he saw wasn’t what he wanted to see. What he heard wasn’t what he wanted to hear._

_“My job here is done.”_

_And Eren saw the man abruptly turn, muttering strings of curses, and he realized that the said man had never looked over to his side. He only checked on Carla Jaeger, as if making sure that she was dead—that she would be left lying on her own pool of blood and that she would never open those eyes that showed him the world and the love that he could received in this lifetime._

_But the stillness, the lack of movement to delineate that she was breathing, was right there presented in front of his very eyes._

_He felt cold to the point that he wondered if he was already paralyzed by the pain, by the incoming grief, by the loneliness, by the_ fear _. And he came to the revelation that there was something stronger that was instilled inside him—Anger. Fury. Rage._

_It blinded him and right before his eyes closed by themselves, tears streaming down the side of his face, the last thing that he saw was that image—of his mom tainted with red and her face was facing Eren._

_And he wanted to forget that image. He wanted to erase the fact that this tragedy had ever happened. He wanted to pretend that he would wake up from this nightmare and his mom would be there and smile at him. He wanted to pretend that this was_ not _real._

_That his mom was still alive._

_That she didn’t die because of some sick_ job _._

_His hand that he unconsciously raised to touch his mom’s cheek once last time had dropped from the air, and all he saw was black afterwards._

_The never-ending darkness that surrounded him consumed him from inside out._

_And that was the beginning and the ending of everything for Eren Jaeger. The beginning that started with a lie as he woke up at the hospital with no memories of that certain night, and the ending that shoved his face down to the glaring fact that both of his parents were taken away from him._

And Kenny Ackerman was behind it.

He was the one who caused the car crash.

Kenny Ackerman was the man who left his mother to die in cold blood.

And he was _Levi’s_ uncle, his only family left behind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was playing some pretty sad music while typing this and I actually teared up. Like, oh God. I'm sorry for this chapter but the question of "Is this real?" Well yes, and you'll find more about it next chapter. Now, you can see why I gave two solid chapters for Eren and Levi DX "Will things get better?" You'll find out!


	19. A Will To Carry Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eren tries to find answers, which will lead to his final decision.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's gonna be so little Ereri here but it's more plotttt. Btw, I was listening to Glassy Sky from Tokyo Ghoul while typing this sooooo.....

**I don’t own SnK**

* * *

 

_“The mystery of it I recall_

_Suddenly the truth will change the way we fall_

_I didn't wanna hurt you, hope you know_

_Empty promises, shattered dreams of love”_

_-_ Glassy Sky _by Donna Burke (Tokyo Ghoul)_

* * *

 

**~Chapter Nineteen: A Will to Carry Out~**

He couldn’t breathe.

It was as if the air in the place was sucked out and there was not even a thin string of oxygen that could keep him on his ground. It was as if his heart had overexerted itself from pumping too fast. Why would it beat that fast? Was it because he was afraid?

Yeah, Eren was damn afraid. Because right before his eyes was the man that killed his mother.

Because he remembered _everything_ now.

His memories came in as a surge, almost knocking him down, and he did stagger a bit. His green eyes fell upon that familiar face, the same one that he saw when he was tittering between life and death—the same face that he last saw before he shut everything down.

He was right there, just within his grasp, and it made him feel _sick_. He figured out what was the reason why he couldn’t breathe; it was because he couldn’t stand the fact that he was breathing the same air as this man was.

“Are you alright, Eren?” Levi asked him, snapping out of his trance and averting his eyes off the man who was now beginning to look at him curiously as if he just noticed his presence. It brought him to that glaring reality that this man was Levi’s uncle, an Ackerman.

Shit. He hoped that Mikasa had no knowledge about this man.

“I-I’m… I just need to get some air,” he told the raven in a stuttered rush and he quickly turned to his heels, not bothering to see Levi’s reaction or even hear his reply. His temple was painfully throbbing now—once faint but now he was feeling a terrible headache coming down. He weaved past tables and waiters before he threw the entrance door open and briskly walked to a nearby isolated area.

He leaned against a wall, hand coming up to rest upon his chest right above where his heart was, and tried to even his breaths. He could hear the flood of blood against his ears like it was drowning him from inside; he could no longer hear or feel anything. He was unaware of the horrible spasms that his whole body was going through, and even if he saw his hand shake terribly, his mind didn’t process it. He felt lightheaded as if nothing was anchoring him on the ground anymore, as if he had no reason to even be here right now. He could only see that face of the same man that he had been trying to hunt down since the day he found out about the truth behind Carla Jaeger’s car accident.

“ _Aarrghhh!”_

A ringing pierced through his ears, silencing the erratic beating that his heart was making, and he gripped his ears. His vision blurred and for a moment, he felt like the world tilted upside down. He fell on the rough earth before he knew it; his back was arched on the wall, almost bumping his head. Pain contorted his face, agony written all over him. He clenched his fists on his lap, half-conscious that they were cold but perspiring like crazy. His labored breathing was the only indication that he was alive, and he blindly wished that he could _end_ this excruciating pain right now.

His eyes were almost closed but he could see in the gaps that his vision was starting to refocus. He tried to soothe himself off the nerves that were rattling inside him, his head that was pounding torturously, and the trembling that went through his body. He didn’t know for how long he had sat there, trying to calm himself, because there was nothing that his mind was processing at the moment.

“ _AAARGGGHHHH!”_

Another convulsion wracked his body and he clutched his head, coming in contact with his own sweat that was dripping down his forehead. The ringing was almost as twice as piercing this time. His tears burst and poured out like a broken dam and he had to stifle his sob.

_“What do you want for your birthday?”_

_The teen looked at his mom, fiddling with his seatbelt and bobbing his head with the music that reverberated in the car. His eyes were sparkling with wonder and innocence as he smiled cheekily to her._

[He could feel his heart breaking. He could finally remember what his mom looked like before he had last seen her. He could finally see her smile again].

_“Mmm, I want to go to that aquarium! Mikasa, Armin and I have been planning to go there but the tickets are mad expensive,” he said the last part sheepishly._

_The dark-haired woman laughed, eyes spared half a second to glance at her son before she turned them back to the front. She stopped at a red light, and the brunet thought that the streets looked eerily empty._

_“Okay, okay. We’ll all go there, then,” she told him and the boy grinned widely._

_He leaned to his mom and kissed her cheek, the safety belt across his body straining him a bit. He sat back down and said, “Thanks, Mom! You’re the best, really.”_

_“Yeah, yeah.” Carla giggled and she stepped on the gas slowly as the light turned vibrant green in the dark night._

[They could’ve gone to the aquarium together. He would’ve had enjoyed the sea creatures that he and his childhood friends loved. That would have been the best birthday gift ever].

_Eren looked outside the window, chin was propped on his palm, and his eyes followed the shadows of houses and stores as they zoomed by._

_“This neighborhood feels so…strangely quiet,” he mused, scrunching his nose._

_“You’re forgetting that it’s already one in the morning,” his mom reminded him. It was indeed past one and the brunet yawned like he hadn’t known how tired he was until he saw the time._

_“The hospital was crazy tonight, right?” he said as he stretched out his arms, knuckles hitting the ceiling of the car. He really did have long limbs._

_“You shouldn’t have come, Eren. Good thing that you don’t have school tomorrow,” Carla reprimanded him._

_“But I wanted to go with you, Mom. I’d rather stay with you while you’re tending the patients than stay home alone.”_

_“Oh, God. You really are not normal for your own age—“_

_“Ugh, mom!”_

_“—but what I’m saying is, I’m a nurse, Eren. I will have overtime and an overload of work again in the future. I’m not telling you to have a secret party and wreck our house—“_

_“C’mon, you know I wouldn’t do that.”_

_“—pfft, yeah right.” He forgot how his mom knew him so well and how she could successfully make fun of Eren. “You should invite Mikasa and Armin and watch movies. You’re not even interested in medicine; your art is like your life.”_

_Eren blinked then pondered about it. Yes, he did show a bit of interest in becoming a doctor before because his dad was once one, but he was more inclined to art now. Last year, his mom bought him a drawing tablet and it became his pastime, sometimes consuming all his time and his mom needed to peel away the device off his hands._

_“That’s true…” he agreed slowly._

_“By the way, you didn’t happen to be snooping around your dad’s study room, did you?” His mom suddenly asked him and he looked at her and furrowed his eyebrows._

_“No, why would I?”_

_“I saw his drawer opened this morning. Your dad was a very meticulous person, always organizing his things that sometimes his OCD drove me crazy.” She laughed and patted Eren’s head._

_“Oh!” He started. “I was looking for the stapler this morning and ended up using dad’s.”_

_“Oh, Eren. You didn’t happen to move some stuff of his, right?” He caught a strange nervous edge on her tone but chose to ignore it._

_“Well, I did see a strange safe but you told me many times not to touch anything so I did not,” he told her honestly. He heard her sigh and he briefly wondered what could be inside of that silver box, which accidentally revealed itself to him when he somehow pressed a hidden button underneath the desk. He didn’t know why would his dad be all-secretive, but his profession was quite something that should be confidential, so he assumed that there could only be important documents there._

[The safe. There was a _safe_. Eren clutched the key pressed upon his chest and gripped it in his hand. There was something—].

_“Eren—“_

_A blinding flash of lights prompted Eren to scream. Then, a loud crash._

_He thought he heard his head crack against the windowpane._

_And then he blacked out._

* * *

 

There were shuffling and muffled noises and Eren didn’t know for how long had he been lying there, with dried tears on his cheeks and his eyes red-rimmed. His mind had been functioning nonstop, laying all his memories bare to him.

_“Eren.”_

His head snapped, abruptly leaning away from the wall that he rested upon for God-knows-how-long. He definitely heard Levi’s voice. He definitely heard him calling out to him and he sounded worried as sick.

And it was _tearing_ Eren apart.

He knew that the chance of the raven finding him was slim to none because Levi knew that the brunet was never a fan of dirty and pissed-smell alleys. But then again, Levi was someone who could be thorough and if his worries were clouding his mind to the point that he couldn’t even think properly right now, then he could even start looking for Eren in the trash bins. And the tortured man knew that it was time to get out of there.

His heart was set in an even pace now and the ringing in his ears were gone. However, he felt numb. He was physically, emotionally, and mentally exhausted and the thought of Levi was ripping him from the inside.

He wanted his lover to find him, console him and tell him that everything was going to be alright, because right now that was all Eren wanted. He just wished that he could believe something right now even if it was a lie. He just wished that Levi’s presence was enough to drown everything else away and to appear that there were just the two of them—such a beautiful dream that he wanted to hold onto right now.

He wished that the world wasn’t _so_ against them right now. _What the fuck happened to Fate and all her binding wishes? Is this some kind of a sick joke she’s playing at us?_

Eren was torn between running after Levi and telling him everything about his mother, about his uncle, about his part-amnesia, and just how much _everything hurt right now_. But the fact that the reality could really break the both of them was enough for the brunet to stand back down and hold all the pain in his chest all alone.

If Levi were to find out about what happened to his mom and his almost-death experience, he would be _devastated._ Then, knowing that the only family member who had taken care of him, the one who took him in after his parents died, the one who was there for him as his guardian even though he didn’t do a good job on it, was the one who killed Eren’s mother—it would _break_ Levi. And that was one thing that Eren couldn’t do to him. He acted upon his feelings and dared to believe that there was Fate—that there could be an auspicious road ahead of them. He fell in love with Levi— _and irreversibly at that_ , he laughed—without knowing what were the consequences of doing so. He was the one who roped Levi into this terrible situation…

_It hurts… It really hurts._

It wasn’t long after he felt his little device digging on his arse and he pulled back to get it from his pocket. It was already ten thirty and there were thirteen missed calls from Levi alone. _I made him worry about me again,_ he thought as he let out a broken laugh. He considered his options right there. He could call Levi and tell him that he went home early because he suddenly felt ill but that would mean that he wouldn’t be able to hold his own emotions from surging and that was what he needed to prevent from happening the most. He could also just leave the matter alone, tell his boyfriend that his phone died, but the guilt was almost as intense as his previous emotion was; Levi didn’t deserve to get lied to. So, he resorted to a text message.

Eren: _I’m sorry, I suddenly felt sick and I couldn’t hold it in. I caught a taxi and currently on my way to Mikasa’s._

It wasn’t a lie. But he didn’t tell him the whole truth either. That, and he was on his way to do the last part of that text.

There was one person who knew something about his partial amnesia, and she was the one that he needed to see the most right now.

 

* * *

 

“Sit.”

It sounded like a command and Eren was too tired to argue even if his nature was telling him to not comply and disobey the blatant order.

“Now, talk,” Mikasa told him in a sharp tone.

He couldn’t directly look at her, but he knew that she was scrutinizing his disheveled look and the fact that his eyes were red. He clasped his fingers on the table and he was glad that Mikasa’s parents were out— _at least they wouldn’t hear anything about this._

He didn’t know where to start but he figured that getting straight to the point would do them good. _If there’s actually anything good from this._

“I remember.”

It only took those two words for him to hear Mikasa suck in her breath and by the shuffle next to him, he knew that she moved closer. He was terrified and anxious—this was the girl who had been there for him ever since he immigrated to this country from Germany. She was his first friend, best friend, sister, and family. She was the one who protected Eren from the harsh truth by simply hiding it from him.

And it _sucked_. No matter how much he tried not to feel anything but gratefulness, he felt a little betrayed. Mikasa had lied to him and hid something so important from him, and he ought to understand why but he couldn’t help thinking _she hid the truth from me all this time_. It was for his protection and he knew that—he knew that from his first-hand experience. His memories that had returned to him weren’t fond ones, though he got to recall his mom’s smiling face before he had lost her, and he was hurt.

He was beyond hurt.

He was now broken and lost and confused.

He had no idea where to start from here now.

His heart was telling him to go to Levi and forget that this had ever happened—that he didn’t regain the memories that he lost five years ago. He wished that he could turn back the time and tell Levi that he wouldn’t be able to meet his uncle because he would be busy and he’d rather go straight somewhere where they could enjoy their dinner alone. But it happened. _It_ happened—he saw Kenny Ackerman and what do you know, all of this was actually a timed bomb and that man—Levi’s _uncle_ —was the one who detonated it.

Porcelain tears traitorously streamed down his face and he felt a soothing pat on his head. But he felt like the damage that had been done to him was enough for him to think that he could no longer be fixed.

“Oh, Eren…” Mikasa sobbed. She brought his head to her torso, her arms were around his shoulders, and she was crying.

And it was tearing his heart apart. _The truth is really something that will change your fall._ Mikasa shouldn’t be crying because of him. But as much as it was painful for him, Eren began telling her what happened, how his memories returned to him. He left the detail about the Ackerman; he was disoriented, yes, but he could still function to some extent that he knew that letting Mikasa know about the man would mean danger to her.

His mouth suddenly stopped but Mikasa didn’t pull away from him as she rested her head on his. His tears had also halted from its course, as his mind finally worked its gears together and he started to connect the dots.

Rod Reiss was a suspected criminal, a drug lord with a black market underneath his whole corporation.

Kenny Ackerman, the vice president of the Reiss Corporation, was the one who murdered his mom.

The key… It was for his father’s safe.

And Eren finally cleared up the fog in his brain. He pushed himself off Mikasa who was startled at his action but before she could even ask him anything, the brunet was already heading towards the front door.

“Where are you going, Eren?” she asked him, voice was loud with concern.

“I need to go somewhere,” he answered her with equal fervor.

“I’m coming with you,” she told him as she began to put on her sneakers. But Eren knew what he had to do, and it was necessary that he would do it _alone_.

“No, you’re not.”

Her mouth parted in shock as if Eren had just slapped her in the face before she practically shouted, “You’re upset, Eren! I almost lost you three months ago! Don’t go—”

“I’M NOT A CHILD, MIKASA!” His chest heaved up and down, gritting his teeth to stop himself from saying something that he would regret later. “I survived the car crash and for all I know, I could’ve died back then! I saw my mom died right in front of my eyes and God knows, what would have happened to me if Mike wasn’t there.”

“Mike? What does this—”

“Mikasa,” he interrupted her, eyes widened at his slip-up but he didn’t give her time to think about it, even though he knew that all of this was going to catch up to her. “I know how to handle myself. You don’t need to baby me—”

“YOU NEVER TRUSTED ME, EREN!” Mikasa suddenly burst out, tears pouring out from those beautiful eyes of hers but they only reflected sorrow and regret now. The brunet couldn’t even stutter out a reply because he knew—he knew that she was right. Thus, he remained standing there as she continued, “Do you think I did not care back then when you almost ruined your life?! Do you think that I did not cry myself to sleep when I found out that you could’ve had died in the accident?! Eren… (She sounded so tired that his name came out as a sigh from her lips and it broke something inside of him) I just…I just want to be there for you, protect you, care and love you, because you are my best friend—you’re my family, Eren. Aren’t we family? Aren’t we supposed to trust each other?”

His lips trembled as he tried so hard to sort out the mess that his mind was making. He couldn’t even voice out a single word as he took in the wreck that Mikasa had become because of _him_. Because he couldn’t trust her. And he wanted to change that so bad, to the point that he wanted to tell her everything right there and then, but he knew the consequences. He knew that he could put her life in danger, as well as her family’s, and he couldn’t afford for that to happen. He’d risk his own life for them, and that was just how much he loved these people—these people who gave him home and never gave up on him during the years he needed them the most.

Eren walked forward to the dark-haired woman and Mikasa didn’t move from her spot. He tentatively raised his arms and she leaned closer as she let him hug her.

As he stroked her hair, he said softly, “I trust you. It’s just that… Sometimes, there are things better left unsaid, because I don’t trust the _other people_. Mikasa, I want you to trust me.”

Her response was immediate and he had the urge to laugh. “How am I gonna do that when I know that you couldn’t live without tripping yourself over a trash bin and falling to your death?”

“You’re just going to. You _have_ to. You protected me all these years—from the emotional scars that I could have had if not for you and everyone—so let me do my part. Let me protect you and the others.”

“Eren…”

“I want to protect you, Armin, Jean, everyone…and Levi.” He couldn’t help but let out the last name in a sob.

“And we want to protect _you_ , Eren,” she said helplessly.

He leaned away and pressed his forehead on hers and he felt crushed as his childhood friend’s tears continuously ran down her face. This wasn’t the Mikasa that he knew; she was strong-willed, smart-witted, and determined. But right now, she looked fragile and hopeless like she was losing Eren at that moment. He wanted to soothe her that everything was going to be okay, but he couldn’t do it. He couldn’t mask the truth with another convenient lie.

“Mikasa, please, trust me on this one. And after this, I’ll tell you everything. I’ll answer every single one of your questions,” he told her as genuinely as he could muster. He knew that convincing Mikasa was like banging his head on the wall and his skull would just crack, but he also knew that somewhere in her heart and mind, Mikasa had always put her trust on him. Even if he couldn’t reciprocate that in the past.

“Promise?” she asked hoarsely, and guilt gripped his heart.

“Promise,” he whispered back.

  

* * *

 

He was thankful that Mr. Ackerman had just arrived home when Eren was about to leave their house, because he knew that he wouldn’t be able to catch any cabs in this ungodly hour. The car ride to his apartment was not quiet, but was not really chatty either. The older man had asked him about how was he doing and what were his plans in the future and oh _how was Levi?_ Everything came into a screeching halt at the sound of the name, and Eren must have had looked pained and crushed because Mikasa’s dad had asked him what was the matter. He merely smiled weakly and said that it was nothing.

It was like a miracle to go back to that comfy bed of his and the sight of it made him want to jump on it and pretend that he was fine, that he was not exactly breaking in the inside. However, there was a pressing need to forget all his plans to escape this reality and it was lying right above his heart. He clutched the golden key that was hanging around his neck before he removed it. He stared at the familiar key that he had received several months ago and there was a sense of familiarity and dread that was being emitted from the object.

And he wanted to run away from it.

This was the _key_ to all of his questions. This would answer all the who’s, how’s, and the why’s. He would finally be able to bring justice to his mom’s death.

Eren walked to his closet and dug around there, trying to search for that certain box that he had hidden inside. It was one of the few things that he kept after their house was taken away from him; the Ackermans had been adamant about buying it so they could keep it until Eren was of age where he could live there again, but he refused their help and told them that what they had given them was more than enough. And of course, the money that came from selling the house was put into the bank, where Eren still didn’t want to spend it because of his own reasons.

He finally scratched at the familiar smooth surface and he hauled it out of the tight space. It was a silver rectangular case, and Eren could now remember whom it belonged to.

It was his dad’s.

He stared at it for several minutes; the fear in his chest was paralyzing him and was threatening to shut him down, but he didn’t want that fear to win over his own will. He wanted to face whatever was inside this case. He wanted to uncover the truth that was buried deep under the lies, betrayal, and deceit that had been the center of his life until now.

He held the key and its intricate design made him wonder how could he actually remember that this was his dad’s. He lowered it to the hole and with a final gulp, he twisted it inside and a soft click resounded inside his very quiet room.

And his eyes landed on a black flash drive, the only apparent object that was hidden in the safe.

 

* * *

 

Eren started to remember a bit about his dad. He remembered that this man had a dark-colored hair, which length was past his chin, and that he wore glasses. Grisha Jaeger would make time for his son even though he seemed to be exhausted from his work, being a doctor for a big hospital and whatnot. They used to play hide-and-seek and Eren would always hide under the covers of the blankets that his mom had freshly washed.

His dad was his role model, the person that he wanted to become—for he was a loving and caring husband and father to his family, and a passionate and dedicated doctor to his work.

And those qualities became his downfall.

After plugging in the flash drive into his laptop, Eren first saw the face of the familiar man in some of his dreams. His recollections might be impaired but he knew who it was just by seeing those dark green eyes.

It was his father. It was he telling Eren everything, from how this matter with Rod Reiss had started to how he died. Grisha knew that his death was going to happen. And Eren couldn’t say anything.

It was a video, recording everything that the dark-haired man was saying, and the brunet strained his ears to hear everything and not to let anything slip by. Every word was important, even though it made him feel sick to stomach—about how Rod Reiss used his father.

Reiss was the one who hired his dad, offering a promotion for him in the hospital, where the businessman happened to have invested a lot of money in. Grisha accepted, delighted that he could improve the state of living his family was in, but he had no idea what work was he going to do in the corporation.

The job started off easy; he only needed to check the drugs that were given out of the pharmaceutical branch of the business. Then, it gradually became a little strange because Grisha was ordered to experiment with some stronger medication and there was one night when he had to deliver the results to Nile Dawk, someone under Reiss’s wing.

_“I saw a line of people in the underground parking lot and I wondered why I never noticed. (_ There was a pained expression on his father’s face and Eren clenched his fists _) I entered this passage after I made sure that no one was guarding it, and oh God. It was horrible. Utterly horrifying as they auctioned off the drugs that_ I _experimented on. Which led me here recording this. I want this to serve as evidence, I don’t know if you, Carla, is watching this, but you need to tell the world about this façade that the Good Samaritan has put up in order to cover his filthy tracks. You need to save those kids, those people… Don’t let them get fooled by Rod Reiss. I’m planning to go to the lab tomorrow. (_ Eren’s eyes widened at the determined look on his father _) I’ll destroy everything—everything that I worked on, because those drugs will not just take people to heights; it is pleasure and ignorance in exchange for a fast_ death _. And this will be the addiction that Reiss feed himself off to.”_

Eren thought it was over because Grisha wasn’t moving on the screen anymore, and he was about to let it all sink it when the sound of his own name coming from that voice suddenly startled him.

_“Eren. If in the future, you’re exposed to danger, I have told Pixis to deliver this to you. He’s the one who can help you in this case; he has the samples of the drugs and he will testify if needed. This is going to be dangerous—but you’re smart, I know you are. You’ll figure it all out. I cannot let any harm come to you, my son. I love you and your mother_ (Tears escaped from Eren’s eyes and his hand came up to touch that familiar smiling face but ended up knocking the screen _). Do not forget that. I’m sorry if I disappointed you—”_

“No, you did not…”

_“—but I hope that you’ll forgive me. Protect yourself with this. Tell this story to the world and unravel the deceit that Rod Reiss is using to hide himself and his rotten business. And Eren…”_

“Yes, dad?”

Could he at least pretend that he was really talking to him? Could he pretend that his Dad was actually smiling at him like he knew that his son was there? Could this bad dream finally end so he could wake up with both of his parents there for him?

_“Be brave.”_

He knew that he wouldn’t be able to hear him, but Eren said it anyway. He already knew what to do. _This_ had shed more light than he expected it to, and now he knew what killed his mom, what killed his dad, and what put everyone around him in danger. And the only thing that was running in his mind at the moment was how he was going to face this with the courage and pride that his dad had instilled in him. He believed in Eren, and his mother showered her love to him until the end. They were his devoted parents who were giving the push that he needed even though they weren’t physically by his side, but that was enough.

He had their will in him.

And he was going to carry it out.

“Yes, I will, Dad, Mom.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I swear I was like crying because I was remembering all the sad stuff from anime when I was on this chapter... You have no idea how much I made myself sad. But that aside, thank you for your kudos, comments, and for reading! :D I'm also posting updates on my tumblr: lilstrawberrychi :)


	20. Tears and Love

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I advice waiting for the next couple of chapters before reading this. Why? Because I cried while typing this. Nuff said. Omg please don't kill me when you read this. There's lots of ANGST. TEARS (hence the title). But seriously... just a warning D:

**I don’t own SnK**

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_“We accept the love we think we deserve.”_

_― Stephen Chbosky_ , The Perks of Being a Wallflower

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**~Chapter Twenty: Tears and Love~**

           

_Eren_

I open my palm and find out that time it is, and the faint light on my phone says that it’s a quarter past 11. A warm breeze passes by and I inhale the scent of the in-between seasons, closing my eyes as I enjoy this warm sensation while it still lasts.

“Oi, brat.”

A smile breaks out of my face before I open my eyes. I turn to the origin of the voice—that familiar voice that made me cry in the middle of the crowd, the same voice that told me things that I’ve always longed to hear, the same voice that I fell in love with. I merely revert back to my original position, facing the glass doors as guests start to filter inside. I stuff my hands in the pockets of my sleeveless sweatshirt, clenching and unclenching them all the while. Not a second later, I hear footsteps and I feel the same aura that always soothes me—that never fails to make me feel warm—right next to me.

“An aquarium? Really?” Levi asks, somewhat amused and my smile falters unconsciously.

_“Mmm, I want to go to that aquarium! Mikasa, Armin and I have been planning to go there but the tickets are mad expensive.”_

_“Okay, okay. We’ll all go there, then.”_

My chest throbs, but I ignore it.

“Yeah. I’ve always wanted to go to this aquarium,” I say.

We both gaze at the sign in bold letters; there’s really nothing special-looking about this place, just your regular aquarium, but I can’t say the same. This has held a much significant part of my heart now with my memories intact, and I’ve pondered before how unexpected it is that my first date with Levi as lovers was in an aquarium too.

Before my thoughts could go to a direction that I don’t want it to go, I hold out my hand to the shorter man standing next to me, palm facing the darkening sky. My luck must really suck if it actually starts raining now.

“Let’s go?” I ask.

He nods to me, and my eyes fall onto his face. I drink in the sight of him—from those expressive grey eyes, to that nose that my own nose had bumped to not too many times, to those cheeks that always go pink whenever Levi is being teased by Hanji or simply just because of me, and to those lips that get swollen whenever we kiss. When he places his hand onto mine, I also let that warm sensation go through my heart; memorizing the heat that I’ve always sought and _will_ always look for.

“You better tell me why you fucking went invisible for a week, but other than that, let’s go.” There is some playful threat lying there but I’m used to that. I’m used to his sarcastic remarks that I now know ninety percent of the mean things he’d ever said in his lifetime is actually just his trying to hide his true feelings. I’m used to that quirk of his lips, saying how much he’s enjoying messing and joking around with others, particularly me.

“Yeah, will do.”

I let my fingers intertwined with his and there is no grunt of annoyance or disapproval, so I give our clasped hands a squeeze. And all the while, my heart is terrifyingly calm but my nerves feel ice-cold and I want to wait until Levi’s warmth could seep through them. I don’t like the cold…

Especially if I know that this warmth will not be there when winter approaches.

 

* * *

 

“Levi, what’s your favorite sea creature so far?”

I avert my eyes off the stingray in front of me to look at Levi who’s staring curiously at the flexible jelly animals. Gradients of blue are reflected on his pale face and I unknowingly raise my hand, wanting to touch that smooth skin, but it stops in mid-air and I let it fall by my side.

Instead of answering, Levi latches his hand on my wrist, which seems to burn and yet is able to comfort me, and he begins to drag me away from that spot. I don’t really want to ask him where are we going because over the months that we’ve been together, I’ve learned that Levi is better at showing his answers with his actions. I wonder if I could be like that; I know that I’m impulsive and I’m quick to say something before thinking over it but, can I show what I really feel only through my actions?

The sight of the long bodies and fins greets me and my eyes widen.

“Dolphins.”

I did expect him to say something ridiculously unique, but Levi has never failed in surprising me yet again. Next thing I know, he’s probably gonna be a penguin-lover, too. I chuckle at the thought and it earns a raised elegant eyebrow from the raven beside me. He has his arms crossed across his chest but he slowly brings one hand out and it silently comes in contact with the glass separating him and the beautiful creature.

“Why?” I ask, not bothering to hide my full curiosity.

A dolphin suddenly swims towards us and I watch in fascination as its nose nudge the glass, the opposite side of where Levi’s hand is. It’s like seeing something unearthly. So goddamned beautiful that I could cry at the moment—

“They can communicate, find the things that they want to find, and it’s special.” He turns and looks at me, now also mystified at how his grey eyes seem bluer now. It’s like Levi has attached a magical string that pulls me towards him and I cannot find the force behind it nor would I ever want to cut that connection. “I wish I have that.”

“…Why?” I murmur.

He lifts his hand up to my cheek and caresses it as if it’s what he’s always wanted to do. It reminds me how much of a coward I am. He can do this affectionate gesture no matter when and where but I can’t, not because I don’t want to display it to people—God knows how much I want everyone to know that I’m in love with this man and that I’m so fucking happy that he returns my feelings—but I know that I’ll lose that right soon enough.

“So I can always find you, Eren,” he says softly that I almost didn’t hear it. And I wish that I did not.

My heart does a few palpating beats against my chest, like drums that are struck in harmony—loud and almost painful. I unconsciously tighten my fists on my sides as I gaze into those eyes that I once believed could actually see through my soul and every façade that I put up around me. I feel the tears spring up onto my eyes and I hope that I can fool Levi into thinking that I’m just unbelievably happy. Even if it’s just a beautiful lie, I want it to be our truth for now. Just this day.

I lean into him and he remains standing close to me but his arm drops from my face. It’s not hard to plant my lips on his forehead when I’m practically a foot taller than he is—something that I always tease him about. I feel him pull me closer by tugging my shirt towards him and I smile in response.

I wish I could just stand here like this, with Levi within my grasp so that I can just pull him to me whenever I want to, so that I can shield us away from the world and stay in our cocoon of happiness.

But it does not work like that.

I cannot ignore the tears that roll down my cheeks, producing searing pain that I know is just a figure of my imagination but they serve their purpose well. They remind me that I’m in pain, that I’m hurting, and that it will continue to do so unless I take action. I wish the ground could just crumble away and hide me from this reality, but I don’t want to take this chance to be with Levi for granted. Nothing’s permanent in this world and I’ve learned to accept that a long time ago. But this pain in my heart will probably never go away.

  

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We’re near the building of the aquarium and a smile graces my face as I think of how one of the things on my To-Do-List has finally been crossed out. However, that smile disappears as soon as my ears catch the question that has left Levi’s lips.

“So, why were you not answering your phone?” Levi asks me as he sits down on the bench.

I follow his actions, maintaining a few inches distance away from him, and I bend my head back to look at the dark skies. I wonder if it’s going to rain soon…

“I’m working on an art piece, something that came up in my dreams again,” I answer. It’s the truth, really, but I don’t want to elaborate on how my inspiration for my artwork has somehow been manifested from nightmares that occupy my nights, that have turned into sleepless ones and with me spending all my time trying to project what has been in my mind the past week onto my canvas. It’s really laughable, how I dreamt of the color red again but this time, the horrible image has included Levi’s face in it.

I shake my head to rid off the thoughts that threaten to kill me from the inside, until I feel a simple touch right in the middle of where my eyebrows meet. I refocus my gaze and I meet those penetrating silver pools yet again.

“You’re thinking way too hard again,” Levi say and his face falls the slightest, but I notice it—I notice how his eyes darken a bit as a negative atmosphere washes over us. “I feel like…I can’t reach you when you’re in this state, Eren.”

Levi has somehow succeeded in making the physical distance between us dissipate into nothingness because the next thing I know, our thighs are touching and he has his hand over mine. He’s grasping it so gently as if he’s afraid that he’s going to break me and it reminds me of how much I hated this after the incident at the bakery months ago. I turn my palm up so that I can directly feel Levi’s hand around mine, slowly filling the spaces between his fingers with my own so that they are interlaced together.

There’s something about this sight that makes my heart beat faster, that makes a pool of fluttering butterflies around my stomach, and that makes me unbelievably giddy and ecstatic. It reminds of when I first planted a kiss on his cheek the day we first met, when I opened my door at my apartment complex and found him standing there with a lunchbox for me, when we talked about ourselves over dinner after my art exhibition, when I first kissed him under the starry night, when we went to France and I got to explore his childhood memories with him, and when he introduced me to his parents. Parents… right. I was going to let Levi meet my parents last week but it didn’t happen. Will it ever happen? Those memories keep resurfacing in my mind and I get startled when Levi shifts to raise his hand to my face, and he wipes the tear that unknowingly rolls down my cheek with a gentle touch.

_Crack. Crack._ It’s like glass breaking.

“I don’t recall ever seeing you this melancholy, brat. Is something wrong?” he asks me with voice full of concern and it sends a pang into my chest, something that I’ve been ignoring the whole day.

“Will you take me to the beach again after we eat?” Instead, I ask him this question and if he’s confused, he doesn’t show it and he merely lets out a small smirk to me. It’s strange how that sends an influx of butterflies to me again.

“Are you feeling Chinese food, right now? And it’s gonna rain soon, you know.”

“Mhmm,” I hum. It doesn’t really matter as long as I’m with him.

Levi then takes my hand, something I notice that’s becoming our thing today; it’s not me who’s taking the initiative and showing off affection, but it’s Levi. And something about that clenches my heart in a way that my breath is almost knocked out of my lungs.

Together, we both walk to his car and he drives us to our next destination.

 

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I was a bit preppy when we ate our lunch, constantly asking the owner of the restaurant what could be their specials and stuff like that. I got to try a few dishes out of their menu and Levi snorted at how much I could eat and that it probably was gonna go to my height again, something I laughed at.

And now, we’re at the beach.

We’re both walking on the sand and I watch in amazement as the sand that I dug out with the heels of my bare feet gets washed away by the water. There’s a salty tang in the air and I love it, even though the skies will open up later and it will pour out. I also love how the sun that is setting in the horizon provides a nice shade of different warm colors, an odd contrast with some of the darkening clouds looming above me, that I’m currently itching to paint. I like how the breeze is just at the right temperature, unlike of how chilly it became last time I was here with Levi. Which reminds me, the raven is actually walking on the sand barefoot without complaints. I would actually chuckle at the scene if I could, but there’s that vice grip that he has in my hand that levels out my amusement to a lower degree, which results to a small grin on my face right now.

“It’s almost autumn,” I breathe out.

“And you’re gonna get a job soon, right?” he asks me. Before I could respond to that, he continues on, “You’re gonna ask Farlan about his architectural designs, right? We can ask him later about it.”

I unconsciously squeeze his hand and I’m about to mutter an apology but go against it as I say, “Yeah, I’m getting a job.”

“And _we_ are going to phone the idiot to ask him about an open job here in the city, right?” Levi repeats the question and though he sounds monotonous, I detect something else entirely in his tone.

Desperation for an answer, that’s what I detect in his voice. It’s so strange to hear Levi talking more than I do, and I’m afraid that I know why.

“Levi…” I start, pulling him back slightly as I halt in my tracks. It effectively stops him, too, and he turns around to face me.

And the tears from his eyes are threatening to spill and I wonder if he knows, but by how much lost he looks right now, I know that he’s not aware of it.

Levi’s black locks sway with the wind and my eyes begin to travel from his face and down to his body. This short-stack has actually managed to bring a lot of things into my life, bringing a light that I was once afraid of touching because I thought that I did not deserve it. All the black-and-white have finally been filled with colors, and now they are being drained again by ever teardrop that escapes from the same man that brought them into my life. And I’m suddenly aware of my own tears that are falling from my very own eyes.

“Eren…” he whispers in the wind and he clasps our hands together even more tightly. “Are you tired of this? Is there something wrong? Did _I_ do something wrong? Please, tell me. Tell me because right now, I’m just—”

He stops as I pull him closer to me, detaching my hand from his, and I feel a stuttered breath come out from his lips. He leans his head onto my chest, right above my heart, and I hold his shoulders with cautious strength like I know that he’s gonna shatter like I just did if I were to hold him as tightly as I want to.

“Aren’t you happy with me, Eren? Am I the only one who’s feeling _fucking ecstatic_ that I finally get to spend my life with the man that I truly cared about? Am I the only one who’s thinking that we _would last_?”

I feel that warm sensation on my chest, the dampness that his tears bring about, and— _fuck it._ I can’t fight off the urge to hold Levi tightly against my chest and that’s what I do. I envelope his petite but firm body with my arms wrapped around him, and I feel small tremors run through his body—Levi who’s always strong, who’s always so careful and meticulous, who’s always the one with the guarded expression. It further breaks my heart, and I want to ignore how the very same man that I admire is shattering in my arms right now.

“It’s not going work out, Levi.”

I force those words out of my mouth, letting them slip by my lips and voicing that rehearsed line out of my system. I feel the ground beneath me crumble into pieces and I feel numb, wishing that this bundle of warmth leaning against my body will be able to thaw that paralyzing fear in me.

“The hell it’s not!” Levi shouts and the intensity makes me blink. I’ve expected this—a little resistance from this short-tempered man—but he’s _not_ physically fighting me. He remains in my arms as if he’s terrified that if he were to leave that place now, then he’s not going to be able to come back to it anymore. And that’s probably what prompts me to pull him even closer, if that’s even possible.

“Levi, you gave me everything I’ve always wanted—a home, someone to love.” Someone I’m terrified to lose. Someone I want to be with forever. Someone I want to be a part of my life in the next lifetime to come. I choose for those words to remain unsaid, to remain stuck in my throat as if a painful thing that I cannot get out.

“Then, what’s wrong?” Levi asks as he pulls away slightly to gaze on my face and I watch as a teardrop lands on his cheek, making his eyes widen a bit, and I harshly rubs my tears away. “Eren…”

“I’m always gonna be that brat who’s oblivious to things, and I’m going to bring inconvenience to you in the future—”

“BULLSHIT! DON’T LIE TO ME! _Inconvenience_? If I thought that you only bring me inconvenience, then I would’ve kicked you out of my life a long time ago! Do you have any idea how much I…” he stops, holding his breath, and his lips tremble. There’s now a much more distance between us as I let my arms drop on my sides and I look at the raven who captured my heart, as he struggles to search for those words to tell me. And I don’t want to hear them.

I don’t want to hear the words that I’ve longed to hear from him when I know that my resolve will become weaker than it already is.

“Levi. You deserve someone better than I am.” I still my voice, hardening my expression of determination. That does sound bullshit to me but I can’t stop it. I’m not good at lying and Levi can probably see it too, the reddening of the tips of my ears and how much pain am I going through right now—

“No!” He vehemently yells out. He stares at me steadily as if he’s trying to search for the truth in my eyes, and before I could say anything to him, he speaks again, “You’re so much more than that to me. ‘Deserve someone better’? You’re full of shit, you fucking brat.”

It hurts, but I know that it’s the anger in Levi that’s talking and I clench my hands, digging my blunt nails on the skin and feeling it rupture and spill some liquid onto my palm.

“Then, what am I supposed to do?” I ask, hearing the helplessness in my own voice. “I’ve given you more trouble than necessary—I almost died on you and… Am I not your biggest fear now, Levi?”

His lips part in surprise and he looks more caught off-guard than enraged now. The silence between us is filled with the splashing of the waves somewhere in the distance, and the skies finally open up and rain goes from small pitter-patters to spattering loudly around us and on us.

“We were happy, aren’t we? I took you to my home, Eren. I gave you what I’ve never given anyone before—my trust and… and we spent time together these few months, and aren’t we stronger than before? We could work it out, you know,” he utters after that stretch of silence between us. I watch the water droplets fall from his long eyelashes and from the tips of his hair, while his eyes are fixated on me the entire time.  

“What if I tell you that I cannot possibly bear that?” I say softly and I’m almost afraid that he can’t hear me because of the rain that is about to drown us from where we are standing. I’m almost afraid to wish that he didn’t hear me because the words that are spilling from my lips are like acid—caustic and extremely painful. It’s like spitting gravel and broken glass. I want to see his face but those strands hinder me from finding out what expression he has right now, but I’m almost afraid to see it. “What if I tell you that…I’m weak? Levi, I cannot tell you what the future will bring but I know that you’ll be glad that I’m not there by your side. Levi, I—”

Levi finally looks up and I let the rain wash away my tears as I stare at his glistening eyes. I feel weak…really weak. This man who was once strong and didn’t let anyone see any of his blind spots and vulnerability, is completely bare in front of my eyes. It’s ripping something inside me and I wonder how much more can both of us take until there’s nothing left to break anymore.

“I love you, Eren.”

Those words that I’ve waited for him to say—he’s now saying them to me like it’s his lifeline. He said that he’s going to wait for the right time to say it to me, is this what he meant by that? No. He probably thinks that this is the only way—

“Je suis amoureux de toi, Eren.”

I blink, eyes widening and I gape at him. His grey eyes are now trained on me as if the impact of the raindrops that is getting stronger is nothing, and it’s probably because we feel numb to the bones now. These swirling emotions do nothing but merely make my knees buckle and before I knew it, Levi is pulling me onto him again. Is he aware of how painfully my heart is beating right now?

“I’m in love with you, Eren,” he sobs out and my body begins to shake. WHY NOW?! I process those words over and over in my head as I digest their meaning. This isn’t the first time…

_“To go such length… Really. You’re such a brat. You have no idea how much I… Je suis amoureux de toi, Eren. To the point that it’s totally fucking driving me crazy.”_

I let him cling to me, refraining myself from holding him but it is almost impossible for me to do so when _these_ memories are coming back to me.

_“I don’t think there are any words that could describe my feelings for you, Eren. I feel like I’m drowning in this—this ecstatic feeling whenever I’m with you. As fucking cliché as this will sound like, I actually saw colors when I first saw you. It started with the moment I saw your bright eyes, shining their way into my life until I could only see nothing but them in my dreams and whenever I close my eyes. Then, your presence practically gave out rainbow colors that should’ve been shitty and I should’ve hated, but I actually longed for it, loved every second of you by my side. All was black-and-white before you, and now that you’re here, making my heart beat like I’m going to have a fucking heart attack, I don’t think I can go back to who I was.”_

“I’m—” It hurts so much.

“—sorry, Levi.” I push him away. I don’t even want to see the startled reaction on his face because I know that it will soon be clouded with more pain. I never knew that loving someone this deeply can cause this immense pain, and I feel like every fiber of my being is being pulled away from him with so much effort that I almost thought I wouldn’t be able to do it. But I did it.

I turn away from him.

I turn away from Levi.

I turn away from the man that I envisioned my future with.

I turn away from my own promise not to leave him alone.

I feel like I’m dying inside and when I’m out of his earshot, I crumple to the ground as I pound my chest with my fist, hoping that the pain will _just go away_.

I wail. I hit my chest to stop the pain. It doesn’t work.

I cry. I let out the tears that mix with the rain and that is all I could do. Cry. Scream. Howl. Like a wounded animal.

 

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_Levi_

I don’t know when did my knees collide with the rough particles of the sand, but I kneel there as if waiting for something—a miracle, perhaps—or maybe I just want the sun to come up again. But that’s impossible; it’s impossible with this rain. I let my arms drop on my sides and I feel like I’m a ragged doll—no life, no will, no heart, but that is a lie.

Because I can still feel my heart breaking.

Eren…

Did I do something wrong? Am I really that oblivious that I never noticed something in him until now? Where exactly did I go wrong? Should I have told him that I love him even before? Is that it? Did he not feel loved at all?

_Did he even trust me?_

How long was it since I cried this much? _How long was it since the last time I cried?_ How long was it since I feel my body this numb? How long was it since I’ve felt like I’m being torn into two?

Ah, that’s right. It was the day I found out that my parents both died in a car accident. I still remember it clearly like a fucking daylight. It was the day before my birthday.

Why did they have to go to that fucking Christmas party? Why did they have to go and buy me a fucking present on the way home? Why did they have to leave me when I needed them the most?

Why couldn’t I protect the ones that I hold close to my heart?

_“I love you, Levi.”_

“If you love me, then where are you right now?”

It’s impossible, isn’t it? He can’t possible hear me. He’s not coming back.

_“I think you’re wonderful. I think you’re best thing that happened to me, and everything about you—your flaws, your skills, your personality—they’re perfect. That’s why, no matter who you were in the past, it will never change who you are to me.”_

“If I’m the best thing that happened to you, then why did you leave me?”

Was our relationship that fragile? I thought I’m his future; was that a lie?

Am I not even allowed to believe in anything right now? Am I not allowed to believe that he’ll come back to me?

“I love you…

I love you, Eren.”

  

* * *

 

 

Eren didn’t know when or how did he even come home, but he knew that he was out somewhere in the beach until he heard a roar of an engine, speeding away from the area. Levi must have been pissed at him, he thought as he gathered himself and proceeded to call a cab. He was lucky that he was even able to find a cab at that ungodly hour, and the rest was just a blur. He stumbled into his apartment exhausted and his damp clothes clung onto his body…and it reminded him of Levi. He managed to make it to his bedroom, unceremoniously throwing himself onto his bed and not caring if he got his stuff wet. He could only think of that face.

Levi’s expression as he cried and held onto Eren.

His tears ran onto his sides; he really thought that he couldn’t drain himself more of this liquid. He thought that he already cried them all out.

In his foggy mind, there was only one clear subject that was present, and he sure as hell wouldn’t let everything go to waste. If he weren’t able to accomplish this task, then he really didn’t deserve anything—he didn’t deserve to have been gotten out alive from that car crash, of the Ackerman’s familial love, of his friends’ concern, smiles, and encouragement, and of Levi’s love.

His love that Eren shattered into pieces.

He closed his eyes in order to stop the pain from coming again but it was no use. He curled into a fetal position, clutching his chest in one hand while his other one searched for his small device. He grabbed his phone and his eyes looked for that one name. He brought the object to his ear, fisting the front of his damp shirt as his eyes remained unfocused.

The person answered their call after the two rings.

“ _Eren? Dude, do you know what time is it?_ ”

“Jean,” his voice was raspy and the person from the other line had gone silent.

“I need to talk to you. And promise me that this will remain between us.”

Eren wouldn’t let his love die like this. And now, he could only hope that he would be able to beat the odds against him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Why Jean? Why did he do this? Would the other realize what is really going on? Questions that are going to be answered in the chapters to come T___T Are they going to get back together? Hell yes. Just *sniffs* stay tuned, kay? ;_;


	21. Operation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eren contacts Jean and he brings about a plan that will lead to the downfall of his enemy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess who stayed home because she's sick? Yup, me. Hence, the early update XD
> 
> I read the comments (and reviews from FFn) and woah whoops. Sorry I sent you some feels last chapter XD But well, answers will be given in this chapter and the next one and the next one....

**I don’t own SnK**

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_“Anger is just a cowardly extension of sadness. It's a lot easier to be angry at someone than it is to tell them you're hurt.”_

_–Tom Gates_

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**~Chapter Twenty-One: Operation~**

Jean stared at Eren in shock.

He gaped with an incredulous look presented in his eyes from across where the brunette was sitting. After Eren had called him at such an ungodly hour, he was concerned as to how his friend was doing because he sounded so…broken over the phone. He might have been already over with his romantic feelings for him, but as someone who had known Eren Jaeger in years, he knew that he had every right to barge into his apartment at three in the morning without so much of a warning except from the “I’m coming” statement from him that ended the phone call effectively. And what he hadn’t expected was for a bloodshot-eyed Eren to come out from his room, or the fact that he practically fell on Jean upon opening his damn door. He didn’t know what was going on until the green-eyed man told him everything. Every. Single. Thing. And Jean didn’t know what to do but stare at the man he once fell in love with, an upsetting feeling settling on his stomach.

_No wonder he looks so broken._

As if by instinct, he shifted on his seat but halted completely as a passing thought came into his mind. Eren probably wouldn’t appreciate to be held by another man—not when he sacrificed everything for Levi, not when he was probably aching with the need to go after the man that he loved so much and erase every lie he had to tell him. As much as that stung, Jean understood Eren’s point of view. If he was in Eren’s shoes and he was the one that he needed to protect with everything he had, Jean wouldn’t hesitate to do it.

He was consumed with sadness as he realized how much painful it must have been for Eren. And he remembered his pathetic excuse of breaking up with this fascinating young man before him.

“I’m sorry,” he started. He looked at Eren whose head was downcast and he couldn’t help but feel useless, face contorting in pain.

“Why are you saying sorry?” the brunette asked him, voice was cracking, after that stretch of silence.

“Because I feel really pathetic right now.”

Eren looked at him and Jean was glad that he wasn’t crying anymore. At this state of his friend, Jean was reminded of the day that he found Eren in his old house. He was in the area where flashes of cop lights blinded the entire street when he was on the way home, and somehow he knew that the checkmarks of absences of a certain student in his class was related to the incident. He ran to Eren’s usual hangouts until an idea clicked into his mind and he figured—he just somehow had a feeling—that Eren would be where his sanctuary was. And Jean indeed found him sitting in a room with an open window, blood pooling on the floor of the old house. That was the start of their friendship and the day he learned that he was simply incapable of leaving Eren Jaeger alone.

“I was a complete asshole to you, and the fact that you came to me for help really wounds me, Eren. I feel really pathetic,” he repeated with bitterness seeping through his voice, meeting that dead gaze that Eren was directing to him. “I broke up with you because of a dare, because of my pride, but that’s only half of the truth.”

“…What do you mean?”

He exhaled loudly and looked at the hands lying limply on his thighs. “I loved you, Eren, and you know that. Which is probably why I was so scared to look at you that time. Law school had been a bitchass pain in the neck and I felt like we were moving farther away from each other, and this pressure had led to one thing and another.”

The atmosphere was so tense that Jean was almost afraid that it would be a never-ending stillness, and there was that sensation that Eren was probably staring at him now, all-ears just for him. And his heart silently throbbed. He should’ve talked to him about this a long time ago, then maybe—just, maybe—he would’ve still held Eren in his arms.

“I was on the verge of becoming dependent on drugs.” There was a silent gasp that echoed in the room and he didn’t have to turn around to know that it was the brunet who was staring at him in shock now. “And my wake-up call was your absence.”

His eyes became filled with sorrow. He really thought that maybe the time he had without Eren in his side would’ve already erased all the pain, but he guessed that that was not the case at all. In fact, it merely spurred on the heartache and his self-diminution.

“Tell me about it,” Eren suddenly spoke that it startled him out of his thoughts, making him look at those ocean eyes that he really loved so much. The thought of this short-tempered brunet giving him all the attention that he would’ve wanted before long almost made him cry and he had to look down again so that the tears that managed to escape was tucked away from Eren’s sight. He didn’t want to look even more pitiful in front of this young man. But the concerned tone in Eren’s voice made his words flow from his mouth, and he once again regretted that he didn’t open up to him before this.

Jean told him everything; how his parents and school had been hard on him to the point that he decided to relieve some stress by going to one house party, something that he didn’t tell Eren about. He was introduced to something that relieved his stress, his worries, and everything, and before he knew what was happening, he was going from small to a high dose of it and all the while jumping from one gathering to another. Weeks before he broke up with Eren, he was trying to get himself away from the ‘influence’ and one irritated moment was all it took for him to blurt out the stupidest thing to Eren, which led to one thing and another (like his parents almost kicking him out after he told them about the drugs, but they helped him out in the end), and he became single. But more than that, he realized how it felt like to be alone—to feel _empty_ without Eren and without the normal interactions with his friends.

“And that’s how I promised to get back on my feet. I want to become… _myself_ again because I saw how wrecked I became and that I was spiraling downwards and I just wanna fix everything and I think it’s really working,” he concluded in a rush. He could feel his blood going to his face, ashamed of what he had done. He might have already done the confessing part to some doctor for them to help him but it didn’t make it sound any better. He made a mistake, but now he was truly trying his hardest to heal his wounds and become whole again.

The sound of the chair scraping the wood made him look up and he watched as Eren approached him and put his hand on his shoulder, giving it a squeeze that brought warm comfort to his chest, filling him the essence that he probably needed for some time now. He realized that this was new, for Eren was more of an impulsive type, saying his thoughts out loud without thinking about it twice, and he was never the one to be calm about it. The corner of his eyes wrinkled as Jean smiled, accidentally letting out a chuckle. The touch on his shoulder became feathery light and he knew that Eren must be looking at him confusedly now.

“That Shortie must have done a great deal to tone your angry-button down quite a notch,” he remarked. It successfully lightened the atmosphere around them and he didn’t miss the shake of the head that Eren directed to him.

“You have no idea.” There was humor in that and Jean wanted to keep that up but Eren became solemn as if something just clicked in his head. He would rather prefer some comical relief over a stress-inducing topic right now, but he knew that he needed to delve further to this situation that this brunet got into.

“You didn’t call and tell me all that for nothing, eh?” he initiated, and a foreboding air erased all the mirth in that room. He didn’t like where this was going and knowing Eren Jaeger, he had every right to assume that there was something big—dangerous and probably something worse than any finals—that was playing in that artist’s mind.  His hands unconsciously clenched on their own and he felt like he was waiting for his life sentence because he knew that he wouldn’t be able to do it—he wouldn’t be able to refuse Eren. And the words that the brunet uttered afterwards made his eyes go big and drew a sharp intake of breath from his lungs.

“I want to break into Reiss Corporation and expose those dirty hands that Rod Reiss is hiding behind his back.”

_Well, there goes my hope of living a peaceful life._

* * *

“Go home,” Eren commanded him in a tired voice, but all Jean could do was splutter some incoherent sentence that should really be “That’s fucking dangerous and you’re not going alone.”

“Who says I’m going alone?” So Eren _did_ understand him. He refrained himself from shoving the man because he knew that would _clearly_ do nothing except that Eren would probably punch him in return.

“What do you mean?” Jean asked, a little freaked out because there they were, on the road and on the way to some arcade because Eren decided that it was a good idea to actually go somewhere after their confession moment just ten minutes ago. Oh, and he might or might not have mentioned that he wanted to take down one of the well-known business tycoons in the country. And did Jean also mention that he was the one who was forced to drive because he didn’t want anything to happen to this almost six-feet _bundle of joy?_

“I have connections…and might have gotten involved in some FBI shit.” That statement almost made him hit the brakes but thank God because he was not some stupid little shit who wanted to break into a fucking corporation. Oh, wait; he was currently sitting next to one.

“This is beyond ridiculous,” he squeaked and he couldn’t stop his face from going red because _wow, that sounds_ sooo _cool._

“I told you to go home and just drop me off some train station,” Eren insisted, letting some annoyance flow in his voice, and Jean really wanted to whack him in the head because _this Jaeger obviously doesn’t know how much he means to people like me, and God forbid that Mikasa finds out about this; she’s gonna fucking break our legs._ He visibly shuddered, willing himself not to think about a certain black-haired woman who would go to the other end of the world for Eren.

“We’re here,” he announced and he turned back to the reckless young man sitting there, looking a bit impatient as evidenced with the tapping of his foot. “And don’t think for a second that I’ll let you go alone.”

“You know why I told you everything, right?” Eren asked; the question bounced off the interior of the car.

“My dad can help you with the court cases and filing one once we get the evidence that we need. I can help with the digging, and my dad will most likely say yes to this because he’s the most passionate one with justice and all that. I’m assuming that I got that all right?” There was really no particular tone in his voice as he said all of that but he watched as Eren shrunk away from his gaze and his face contorted with some guilt.

“Don’t feel sorry; I know what you’re thinking right now. But I promise you that I’m helping you because of my genuine concern of your entire being, which, by the way, I had found beaten and bloody and battered in more than one occasion. I’d rather not see…” he trailed off. He really didn’t want to envision such a horrible image in his mind so he quickly switched gears, “By helping you, I’m also gaining what is there to gain for becoming a lawyer, you know.”

Eren was silent for a while but he knew that the artist was seriously thinking about what he said; if there was something that Eren knew about Jean, it was the fact that he couldn’t be completely selfless. And he was glad that he was that person, because seeing his friend like this would have made him think about sacrificing everything for him.

He realized then that Eren was just as selfless as he was afraid himself to become. He did everything for Levi—endured the pain that was caused by such tragic fate that tied them together in a form of love that ended in less than twenty-four hours. The pain was raw and unbearable, Jean knew that, and how could Eren stand up even after all that was something he couldn’t fathom.

_He’s strong._

And he had been strong ever since he lost his parents. Ever since he became alone.

 

* * *

 

The FBI department upstairs of an arcade was the last thing would come in mind unless you played too much video games, but here he was, in front of a desk of someone named Mike Zacharius. Yes, Eren’s boss.

“You’re the owner of the bakery,” Jean uttered dumbly, staring at the blonde with wide eyes. At the corner of his eye, Eren sagged on the chair situated in front of the agent.

“Please, have a seat,” Mike asked him politely with a small smile on his face. It dissipated a second after as his eyes swept towards Eren who looked even more exhausted. Jean made himself as comfortable as he could be on the chair opposite from his friend.

“What happened?”

Eren looked at the older man with eyes that glinted dangerously—and possibly murderously, but Jean chose to ignore that—before he began pocketing something from his jeans. He then took out something small and black that Jean’s eyes followed until it was pressed on the palm of the agent.

“My dad’s…last message,” he said, pausing a bit.

_It’s the flash drive._

“What is its content?” Mike asked, all serious now and the intimidating aura around him made Jean glad that he was not sitting that close to the man. He would’ve already been swallowed whole if that was the case, because he was really all nerves right now.

“Material to expose Rod Reiss,” Eren answered. Before the man could open his mouth to question him any further, those blue-green eyes hastily scanned the area and Jean caught the twitch in Mike’s eyes. “Where’s Erwin?”

_Erwin? Who—Oh, right. Levi’s friend._

“It’s…”

“Don’t lie to me, Mike,” Eren growled out of the blue that it made Jean flinched.

Mike’s shoulders slumped forward and he clasped his fingers to rest his chin over it. Jean felt bad because the agent looked thoroughly spent like he had been under the gutter for weeks.

“In the hospital.”

Eren abruptly stood up and began pacing, which was something that told Jean now would be the perfect time to leave before all hells break loose, but that would be cruel and would be downright wrong because he volunteered to do this. _But what am I really getting myself into?_ And he found out the answer to that unspoken question when Eren made his outburst.

“YOU TOLD ME THAT EVERYTHING WAS ALRIGHT!” The brunet screamed but Mike looked unfazed as if he was expecting it. Eren stopped short in front of the older man and he slammed his hands on the desk with his eyes glaring accusingly to the agent. “You told me that I could have the OK to go to France and that the attacks have stopped after that incident at the bakery. You told me that there was nothing to worry about. I shouldn’t have believed you—”

“I wasn’t lying.” Mike stared at the younger male with intensity that even Jean wanted to back away from. “They ceased their activities, not until a week ago.”

Jean looked at Eren as the color drained from his face.

“What were you protecting me from?” he whispered and Jean almost didn’t catch it.

Mike looked away and leaned his mouth away from his hands and Jean almost couldn’t catch on until he spoke once again, “I had to make sure that they didn’t know you were alive this whole time.”

Eren shook and Jean would’ve already whisked him away if not for the fact that this matter was really none of his concern. He didn’t know what the details were but based from what Mike said, it looked like this whole ordeal was even more complicated that he thought it was. No, this was terrifyingly dangerous and he had to shake away the thoughts that someone might not make it alive in one of these days. Was this the battle that Eren had been fighting against all this time?

“They don’t know that I’m alive? No. They _did_ not know.”

Mike’s gaze flickered back to the brunet and he stated, “I pulled some strings and erased your records of relation with your parents in most systems they could get information out of. It was shown that you died in the car accident. But they _probably_ found out about that, and about _you_.”

Eren went back to his seat; eyes were going wild with the information that was obviously not well-received. Eren told Jean earlier that Mike was protecting him from the people who caused his mom’s death and possibly his dad’s, too, and all this time whatthe brunet thought he knew was that those people already knew about him. But this revelation truly made this whole thing even more fucked-up.

 _This means that all this time Mike and Erwin were protecting Eren’s identity while shouldering the attention to themselves because_ they _knew that these FBI agents are onto them and it’s a reason to attack. And now that they probably know about Eren, they know who the real threat is now. He’s the son of the doctor that knew about their business and Eren remembers who killed his mother. He’s the key to everything. Ah, shit. What the hell is gonna happen now?_

As Jean mulled about the quagmire that was currently presented before him—such dilemma that he knew he wouldn’t be able to get out unscathed—Eren filled in the silence with voice that cracked as he tried to stop his trembling.

“Cap, please do something for me,” Eren pleaded and Jean stared at him. “Protect _them_ for me.”

There was a beat of stillness before Mike responded, “Already did that.”

 _He truly is selfless._ How could he actually think about Levi, Mikasa, Armin and his other friends and family when it was _his_ life that was truly in danger here? Jean looked away and closed his eyes. He already made his resolve.

And it was the next statement that Eren let go from his mouth that sent the finality of it.

“I want to catch them all.”

           

* * *

 

Jean would never think that in his life, he would actually work with the FBI this soon. Yes, he knew that he would work alongside with the police and the other figures of justice because he wanted to be a lawyer, but that didn’t mean that he expected himself a part of an operation to take down one of the biggest corporations in the country. Now that he thought about it, wouldn’t that be bad for the economy? Oh, how much he hated thinking.

“Did you get to talk to your art professor?” he asked Eren, who was practically bouncing on adrenaline. Jean was high-strung too because these days, he felt like someone would gun him whenever he stopped by a street, which wasn’t really that far-off from reality considering that their enemies were probably watching them. The thought made him shiver.

“Yeah, and he gave his approval. He never thought that I would find out about this thing so soon,” Eren told him.

“This _soon?_ Are you kidding? That’s five years,” Jean couldn’t help but say.

“I know. I interpreted it as his saying that he never really wanted me to find out about this, which made me think that he was probably thinking of making a move before I did.”

“How old is Pixis again?” Jean asked, his voice raising a pitch higher.

“I don’t know,” the brunet frowned. “In his 50’s? 60’s?”

“And he expects to _take them down_?”

“I guess,” Eren shrugged.

Wow. This world must be crazier than Jean thought it was.

“Eren, about Armin—”

“No,” the response was immediate and Jean almost felt sorry that he brought the blonde up but he knew that he had to.

“He could help us hack their system, Eren. Hell, he’ll hack the screens of Times Square if he wants to. All I’m saying is that—”

“It’s too dangerous!” Eren yelled, which earned a couple of conspicuous stares from the other tables.

“Armin isn’t as weak as you think he is. Everyone that you’re trying to protect is stronger than you think they are,” He whispered more harshly than he intended to. Jean knew that he was touching a sensitive topic but he knew how to break Eren’s seams and he already thought about this. With Armin’s little genius mind, this operation would have a higher chance of success. He wanted for everything to work out, now that they were at this point where there was no turning back.

He sighed. It was tiring and being in this operation-take-down-Rod-Reiss had probably already taken away ten years of his life, but there was something that kept him grateful that he was in this position right now. It was horrifying, but Jean now knew that this world was cruel and that not everything was solely focused on one individual; an event could turn into a chain that could drag everything and everyone to drown in sorrow and anger and anguish. He knew that there were even more appalling events and awful human beings out there, but the fact that someone he knew was going through this knocked him off his feet. Acknowledging it was one thing, but seeing it was another thing. Was this why he wanted to become a lawyer? Was it because he wanted to become the shield of the weak and the victimized? Was it because he wanted to see the world for what it really was?

But other than the things that got him thinking about his career, Jean felt useful. He was needed. He was necessary. And the thought that he could help someone through his own effort made him thankful that he was alive.

He now wanted to see the world for what it really was.

“Sorry, I know you’re trying to help and you do have a point but let me think about it.” Jean had to bite his tongue to prevent the _but we might not even have that much time left_ leave his mouth. “Thank you.”

He didn’t need to glance at Eren to know that he was giving him a small smile. He merely stared at the singer performing on the platform with the people giving her a round of applause.

“You’re welcome, but I really want you to know that you probably shortened my lifespan,” he said with a playful smirk.

He heard a light chuckle, which made him turn to his friend and his eyes shifted behind Eren and caught someone whose face was shielded away by a black bowler hat. Jean’s blood ran cold and somehow, he knew that he was one of _them_. He harshly pulled Eren’s arm, almost knocking the cup of iced latte on the table, and he heard him hiss.

“What the _hell_ is wrong with you?”

Eren looked like he caught on because his eyes widened and a flitting look of panic crossed his face. He attempted to turn to see who it was but Jean gripped Eren’s arm more tightly and whispered between his teeth, “Don’t.”

It took some tense silence before his brain finally stopped its temporary brain-freeze and finally worked its wonder, and Jean couldn’t hear the singer anymore or the clamor of people chatting or clapping hands. He swiped his eyes around the coffee shop and saw a backdoor, and the performer was stepping down from the platform—now would be the perfect chance.

“Let’s go,” Jean muttered and they stood up as a group of people from the adjacent table began to head for the front door. He took that moment to mow down the other people in the way as they busied themselves in giving the singer compliments and whatnot. They were almost there, but Jean felt Eren go rigid that he halted on his tracks.

“ _What the fuck_ are you doing, Jaeger?”

Eren spoke as if he didn’t hear him, “That’s the same man I saw at the gallery show.”

Everything clicked then. Of course, Eren fucking Jaeger just had to be famous enough to get spotted by one of Reiss’s men. That was how it all blew up. They probably investigated him and found out that those records from years ago were all false.

“The more reason we have to hurry.” Jean wanted to shove Eren in the front but his eyes widened as the said man with the hat stared at him. It made him falter for half a second but now that he knew what he was living for, Jean wouldn’t just get rooted on the ground. He was needed, and yeah, they really needed to do something too.

Like—

“Shit. Run.”

And that was what they did.

Jean didn’t need to look back to know that the surprised shrieks of some customers and some glass breaking was because of a person who could probably be chasing someone. Yeah, someone or some people—namely Jean and Eren. He was thankful that the backdoor was working because being stuck between a closed door and a damn hitman or something would have been the worst situation of all times. He was certainly thankful for those hours of working out because his lungs weren’t giving out as adrenaline rushed into his veins, spurred on by a combination of fear, panic, and determination.

They made it out of the back alley and the smell of rat piss, Chinese food take-outs and whatever disgusting things lying around hit their nostrils that made Jean gag a bit. The lack of response from Eren’s part made him look at his companion and the look of utter constipation on the brunet’s face almost made him laugh. But that wasn’t really the proper time for it, not when there could be someone running behind them with a gun. Jean remembered thinking how cool it was to see an assassin when he was a kid because they were pretty badass but now that this situation had him involved as that assassin’s target, he couldn’t help but curse the existence of them. Oh, how he loved to be innocent once again.

They continued running and even if it was already late at night, there were still many people who were hanging around. Like c’mon, it was ‘the city that never sleeps’. They kept bumping to people and the resounding curses and yells some yards away from them were the clues that there was someone who was indeed hot on their heels. Jean couldn’t help but think that a single man couldn’t possibly take them out, which means that Mr. Assassin must have had some friends situated on certain positions. Going to the subway stations would be bad and so would be going to some shop; they might even involve some innocent civilians and Jean didn’t want that.

Eren abruptly stopped and Jean was afraid that he tripped or something, like that on those dramatic action movies (he really hated seeing those parts because it was just simply cliché as fuck). However, the loud gasp that came from his companion made him follow where he was currently staring. And there _he_ was, with his silver Maserati and his permanently molded of a grumpyass face… Oh, wait. _Uh-Oh. Shortie looks real pissed right now._

It made Jean think that he’d rather deal with Mr. Assassin behind them than with Levi… who was, by the way, shooting off looks that could make a grown man cry. And no doubt, it was directed to Jean.

Then, he heard him yell out, “Fucking duck, horseface.”

He would’ve laughed if not for the fact that a baseball bat was flying towards him.

_Well, shit._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Btw, well, since my exams are over, I will most likely have two updates in a week starting uhm next week, maybe? That's the plan so stay tuned~ And wait for my updates ^-^


	22. Lies and Betrayal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hanji helps Levi deal with his broken heart. Truths and lies are discovered. A choice is made.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter will let you take a peek on Levi's perspective (I will most likely make a chapter solely in Levi's first point of view from how he met Eren down to the end - don't worry about it, I don't think we're approaching 'the end' yet *phew*)

**I don’t own SnK**

* * *

 

_“This is a good sign, having a broken heart. It means we have tried for something.”_

_― Elizabeth Gilbert_

* * *

 

**~Chapter Twenty-Two: Lies and Betrayal~**

 

There was something weirdly wrong about the current situation and Hanji knew that the moment she heard Levi’s cracking voice over the phone. It happened three days ago, she was on the way home after she stayed up late at the college hospital again and Levi, who only called her like _once a month_ , suddenly showed interest in having a conversation with her. It was either the situation was gravely serious, which she assumed was something along the lines of murder or an accident (like the time the Short-stack sent a panic voice call the moment he found his goldfish dead and Hanji laughed so hard because the mid-twenty-year-old sounded genuinely shocked), or the earth and the moon had stopped spinning altogether. Which one was worse, she didn’t know.

“H-Hey, Glasses.” His voice sounded hoarse and since Hanji didn’t have a filter in her mouth, she spewed out the first thought that came to mind.

“Have you been crying?” she asked, not even trying to omit the very surprised tone in her voice. She parked her car outside her apartment and carried the books from the backseat, feeling grateful that she didn’t manage to chuck away the only Bluetooth device that she had.

There was silence on the end of the line and Hanji was about to get her phone out to check if Levi indeed had already hung up on her, but a whisper of words had prevented her from doing so.

“Are you up for drinking tonight?” he asked. The redhead was already throwing away her stuff in the living room before jogging back towards her car.

“You know I’m always up for any hangouts, Pipsqueak,” she said, not being able to refuse herself the chance to call Levi names right now. The lack of retort made her grin falter and the distinguishable sound of Levi ending the phone had wiped off any mirth on her face.

Something was terribly wrong, and she had a feeling that she had to be there by her friend’s side right now or she might regret it later.

 

* * *

 

It turned out that Levi was already on his umpteenth glass of vodka and Hanji gasped dramatically at the strewn clothes in the living room, because that was just _not_ Levi. That short temper of his was something not to mess with and Hanji had learned over the years not to tap that angry state of mind, because one of the things that Levi hated was being disorganized and messy. But here she was, standing in a less-than-meticulous surrounding, something that Levi shouldn’t be comfortable with since the guy was obviously a clean freak. And one more thing that her mind grasped was the fact that the raven was having shots, which he deemed less elegant than wine. Levi never drunk himself to stupor before, much least even thought about it, so it really made Hanji flabbergasted.

“Oh… Glasses.” Levi appeared from the mini-kitchen and Hanji swallowed the bile down her throat. The Short-stack was disheveled and she could bet right now that he wasn’t even aware that his clothes were damped. It was raining a while ago—but it had already stopped! What could’ve happened that Levi didn’t even bother to change his clothes?

“Levi, do you want to get sick?” she asked in a motherly tone. If there was something that she was good at, it was being multiple persons at a time; she could be someone’s best friend, worst enemy, a consultant, or a mother when she was needed to be one. She wanted to understand people and her friends, but for the first time she didn’t know what to do with this Levi.

“ _Oh_ ,” Levi simply remarked as if he had never noticed that his clothes were slightly wet until now. Hanji made a beeline to the kitchen and purposely slapped her hand on her friend’s forehead, maybe to snap him out of his trance, to check his temperature. It didn’t seem like he had a fever but he could very well be sending himself to the hospital if he remained acting like this.

“What the hell happened, Levi?” she asked, voice was rising a bit higher because she was now fully concerned about what was going on. It was rare to see Levi like this, and now that she thought about it, this might be the first time that she’d seen him like a wreck he was now. She couldn’t even comprehend that such situation could even apply to this meticulous, intimidating man. 

“I…,” he started and stopped to let out a hiccup. His eyes were downcast and the shadows under them looked more bluish-black than anything she’d ever seen before. His face looked pale, which she assumed was because he stayed out in the rain earlier, and his shoulders were slumped. Gone with the Levi who stood tall and proud. What the hell was this human being who was staggering like a train wreck right now?

“I don’t even—hic—know what happened,” he finished and Hanji could’ve sworn that she saw some glistening shit in his eyes and that terrified her. It was Levi who was supposed to be strong and determined and set on what he always did—and yet, those silver eyes were empty, as if the life had been taken away from them. It made her remember of that conversation she had with him months ago.

_“What’s your favorite thing about Eren Jaeger?”_

_Levi was slow in responding but when he looked up to her, those gray eyes were shining and Hanji felt a tight squeezing in her heart because she was happy for him and she knew—she knew that those eyes held so much adoration and love even before Levi uttered those words to her._

_“His whole presence that lights up my world.”_

“Hey,” she called out slowly, dragging the word out and forcing her lips to tug upward. She wished that it was just a joke and before she knew it, she let go of the question that had been plaguing her on the way here. “Don’t tell me you and Eren broke up.”

_Crash._

The sound of the glass breaking made her flinch but along that sound came with the realization that she probably stabbed Levi’s heart with the broken shards when she voiced out _his_ name. Oh, no.

She couldn’t help it; she wrapped her arms around this short man whose pride was as big as the fucking sun. But the same man was now sobbing uncontrollably in her arms. She ought to check if he got hurt when the shot glass was dropped but she knew that what Levi needed right now was someone who would listen to him.  

“I didn’t know what I did wrong.” “He was and he still is my everything.” “Have I wronged him?” “Am I not good enough?”

It broke her heart to hear him utter those questions and she couldn’t help but wail with him and continue crying even after Levi had already calmed down, even when he went stiff in her arms. To hear him doubt himself like that was something that she just couldn’t take and it made her cry harder. She remembered how much of a grumpyass he was the day they met at the police station. Erwin was the one who introduced them to each other and they grew to be comfortable with each other’s presence, and Hanji truly appreciated that Levi was the one with the crude humor that could go well with her eccentricity—or so what she heard what others said about her personality in the university. They did everything together and they were almost inseparable but Hanji knew that Farlan and Isabel had roles much closer to Levi’s heart. He told them about his story the second year they knew each other, and Hanji was fascinated at how could such a well-cultured man have an interesting background like that. She appreciated that Levi was strong enough to overcome the challenges presented in his life in the past; otherwise, she wouldn’t have met this small man with a big heart.

Hanji just wished that Levi could also overcome this obstacle, maybe not right now, but surely later. However, there was also that silent part of her heart that didn’t believe that Eren Jaeger, the innocent kid who managed to break Levi’s barriers down like they were merely pieces of paper in a short amount of time, could do that to the man that he loved so much. She could tell that Eren had more substance than that; he wasn’t the type of a person to give up because of trivial reasons. The moment she saw that look of determination on his face when he was gazing at his artwork, Hanji knew that the kid had the most fight inside him than anyone else, no matter what the situation was. And there was that fact that the kid was _very much_ in love with Levi; she could see the same shine in his eyes whenever he talked about his lover.

But she also didn’t want to give Levi false hope.

That was why she stayed with his best friend as they talked about life and love and pain on the couch. All the while, the muted TV was providing light to them, letting Hanji become aware of the stains of tears on Levi’s face.

 

* * *

 

She didn’t know what time it was when the silence just stretched for a while. She might have fallen asleep, she didn’t know, but the sight of Levi’s closed eyes greeted her and the slow light filtering through the glass windows was the first indication that it would be close to morning now. Wow, she needed to sleep for an entire day to function later on.

“Did you see Erwin?” Levi suddenly asked and she jumped out of shock for she thought that the raven was already sleeping.

“What the hell, Levi?! You’re awake the entire time?” There was no reply to that so she continued, “You didn’t hear about Erwin?”

“What about him?” Levi’s voice was neutral but Hanji didn’t miss the slight indication of non-nonchalance there. She was certain that Levi cared more than that, especially because Erwin was one of his very close friends here.

But that was odd.

Hanji looked at him seriously, pushing back her glasses to the bridge of her nose. She was trying to figure out if Levi was really lying or not because there was no way that such news didn’t go through him.

“Erwin is in the hospital,” she told him carefully, scrutinizing any action of her friend as if she was afraid that Levi would fly away any moment now. “It was rough because his work got entangled with a messy bunch of people. You seriously didn’t know about this?”

Levi’s eyes seemed to have a bit of a life now, but it was only surprise, which confirmed that he really didn’t have any knowledge of this incident. Hanji scrunched up her eyebrows when Levi muttered a “what”.

It happened for a flitting moment. There was an absolute surprise on the raven’s face before it changed to a look of concentration, bringing out more color to his face and some lightness in his eyes, and the sharp anger and panic cut through his previous expression. It made Hanji panic a bit too, but it was more of fearsome and thrilling to watch because it was rare for Levi to show emotions like this. However, there was that ominous feeling pressing down her back that made her think of Eren. Something was going on, and at the same time when her memory of the ‘bakery incident’ came back to her, Levi suddenly had a burst out.

“We need to see Erwin. Is he okay? Is he alive?”

“I-I’m pretty sure he is,” Hanji answered, a bit startled because she was shaken out of her thoughts.

“How did he get injured again?” Levi asked, eyes were narrowed as if he was ready to force out the information out of her. It made her raise an eyebrow to him.

“A bullet wound in his arm. I heard that it was pretty bad but he’ll live,” she told him. The light in the room spread and Levi’s ferocious look suddenly made everything seem scary. Why was he giving off that look now? Did he somehow come across something she hadn’t deciphered yet?

Hanji wouldn’t find out until later.

 

* * *

           

She ought to be impressed really. How could a silent and very scary man communicate with another intimidating and short-tempered one without causing sparks to fly in the room? Instead, it looked like Erwin and Levi was having one whole conversation for the two of them alone and Hanji wasn’t following until she heard Eren’s name.

“Erwin, several months ago, I caught you talking to Eren alone. Somewhere around that time, Mr. Zackly told me to drop the Reiss case. Do any of these ring any bell to you?” She heard Levi ask but it was more like a statement for he sounded so sure about what he was saying and she could have sworn that the blonde’s already pale face went whiter than a ghost. Erwin then coughed as if to clear his throat and for the first time, the redhead finally spoke.

“Don’t tell me… Eren’s involved in your work, Erwin.”

Those cerulean blue eyes snapped towards her like an eagle ready to snatch its prey from the river. When she first met him in her university, she was a bit intimidated by the man but she was more interested in getting to know him because she could tell from a mile away that his scary aura was something like a mechanism to drive people away. Then a month later, she found out that he liked wearing speedo when he was swimming and she thought that _this guy would probably shove my ass out of the window if I shave his eyebrows_. But the same man who she made fun of all the time had a troubled look on his face now and God knew how she wished that she wasn’t right on the bull’s eye all the time.

“I met Mike. Mike Zacharius and he’s Eren’s boss at the bakery. There was that one time when I saw him leave Eren’s apartment and he was injured,” Levi went on. Hanji looked away from them, shifting on her seat next to the hospital bed and drifting her eyes towards the window. It was too bright and too nice out for this conversation.

“Levi,” Erwin spoke for the first time and Hanji bit her lower lip to prevent herself from spouting some nonsense because she didn’t think that some humor would be appreciated right now. “I’m assuming that… that kid did something stupid again?” The blonde sounded as if he was a father and it made her wonder just how close had Erwin and Eren become for him to sound protective and endearing right now.

“Oi, oi. Don’t tell me you adopted Eren while he was out of Levi’s sight,” she couldn’t help but joke.

Erwin gave her a wistful smile before all seriousness took place on those blue eyes. “Eren is strong. He’s willing to sacrifice everything to protect those who are important to him. That’s why—”

“He left me.”

It felt like those words had sucked all air in the room and Hanji felt suffocated. She bent her head downwards and clasped her hands in front of her. No matter how many times had Levi cried and poured his feelings out, the betrayal, the loss, and the pain were still there present in his voice and in those silver eyes. She just wished that Eren would come right now and erase the doubt and self-hatred from Levi because the one thing that she wanted the most was for everyone to be happy, for Levi and Eren to be happy.

“Levi—”

“That little shit has been doing something dangerous behind my back, right?” Levi asked, tone was suddenly rising and just in time when Hanji lifted her head, her mouth opened and her eyes widened when she saw Levi grabbing Erwin’s collar tightly.

“LEVI!” She shouted and attempted to pull the raven away, but Erwin’s big hand grasped her wrist and put it down. She looked at him but he was looking at Levi with so much regret in his eyes.

“You…! You knew how much Eren meant to me and yet, you let him put his life in danger! What is he dealing with right now, Erwin?! Tell me!” Levi yelled out, bringing his closed fist in the air as if he was ready to strike Erwin and Hanji wanted to stop any more bloodshed from happening. The sight of her friends fighting like this was too much; it felt too _real_.

“Stop it, both of you! Levi, don’t you dare hit Erwin and Erwin, don’t provoke Levi!” She screamed at them and she briefly wondered if the nurses would come into the room any moment now because they were obviously not quiet at all. However, she couldn’t bring herself to care right now at all.

Suddenly, Erwin grasped Levi’s wrists as if the latter wasn’t struggling to punch the blonde in the face a second ago. Hanji halted, too, because there was no mistaking it now. There were tears threatening to spill from those blue eyes as they concentrated on Levi almost accusingly.

“I’ve been trying to help Eren for five years now, Levi! Mike and I have been protecting him! _You don’t know anything_ (Levi flinched visibly at that). That kid has been fighting a long and bloody fight on his own and we’re keeping him alive,” Erwin stopped on that note with a calmer voice than how he initially burst out.

“What…” Levi muttered, eyes were going wide in shock and lips were opening like a fish. Hanji couldn’t believe that Levi was really losing his composure now after years of knowing him. “What do you mean?”

Erwin closed his eyes and pulled back his good arm, the one with no blue sling. Levi was rigid as a rod and Hanji couldn’t imagine what turmoil must he be going through right now. The atmosphere was too thick and she could feel her sweat sticking to her forehead. Erwin then opened his mouth and words spilled to their ears.

“Eren is trying to find out who murdered his mother.”

“What…”

“HUH?!”

There was a collective gasp from both Hanji and Levi and their eyes went big like saucers, which she would’ve found comical, given a different circumstance.

“What the hell do you mean?” Levi beat her to that question, something that was becoming a trend now.

Erwin looked at them solemnly and simply told them, “Ask Eren yourself. I shouldn’t be saying this, really. I broke my promise to that kid now.”

“Promise…?” Levi asked incredulously. He fixated a glare on Erwin who didn’t even budge for he was most likely immune to Levi’s prick of a personality. “You promised Eren that you would cover him? You promised him that you wouldn’t tell me anything?!” he shouted his last question and the blonde merely looked at him as if the answer was obvious.

“I promised that I would _protect you_. Mike and I swore that we would help him protect you and his friends,” Erwin told him in an exasperated tone.

 _See?_ Hanji wanted to cry.  _Eren would never hurt Levi like that without a good reason. And that’s some reason to break up with him. How could that kid even think about other people when he’s the one who’s probably struggling the most right now?_

“Why would you—”

“Because he loves you, Levi.” There was a painful breath being let out, rattling like fragile china. “He’s willing to sacrifice his past in order to be with you. If you believed even for a second that you didn’t mean anything to Eren, then I would gladly beat you to pulp right now so I could put some sense into that head of yours.”

It was the first time that Hanji heard Erwin talk like a brute and she smiled because she knew that it was his way of showing that he cared.

“I’ll help you do that,” she offered Erwin and smirked at Levi. “I think you really should be going right now, Pipsqueak.”

Levi lifted his head slightly that indicated that he was listening to them. He had his hands clenched on his sides and Hanji knew that he needed one more push.

“He’ll be gone again before you knew it, you know. I thought he’s your everything?” she prodded. Those silver eyes met hers and the scowl that was so familiar was finally back on that crude mouth.

“Don’t call me Pipsqueak, you goddamned four-eyes,” Levi retorted and he turned his sharp gaze on Erwin. Hanji noticed that the light in those gray eyes had finally returned and it made her smile grow bigger. “You better be thankful that you’re injured right now or I’ll be the one to pummel your ass.”

“Whatever you say, Ackerman,” Erwin said back, a smile dangling on his lips.

Hanji almost missed it but she knew that she heard it right.

“Well, t-thanks, you guys,” Levi said so softly, his cheeks were tinted pink as he turned from them.

“Hell yeah!” Hanji laughed boisterously and she helped herself in saying, “After you sort out everything, you better give Eren a mind-blowing make-up sex!”

A smirk was sent to them and Levi was gone. Being a dark knight in a shining armor must be a taxing job, but he would get his prince in the end, ay?

 

* * *

           

Levi ignored it. He ignored the painful throb in his chest and the way that his eyes stung—what Erwin told him was resounding in his head like a broken stereo. He didn’t know how to react or how to feel anymore; there was only a mix of rampaging emotions inside his ribcage right now that was threatening to be let out. He ought to feel hopeful and loved because Eren didn’t really leave him, but he felt a little betrayed. Eren had been lying about this important matter for months now (Levi gripped the steering wheel even tighter at the thought of the bakery incident), and he felt like Eren never actually let him into his life at all. He felt disappointed and hurt—because Eren didn’t trust him enough.

His mother was murdered? How? When? Why would he be hiding this from me?

Those questions ran inside his head only to be countered with a dead-end wall because he got _nothing_. He could only think _damn Erwin for not telling me everything._ He knew that he could only get some answers from a certain person and he was willing to go through anything to reach his destination.

Levi pushed the door open, finding that there was a line of people in front of the counter. It was already getting dark and he figured that he really should get onto his business in this bakery before it could get really late to look for Eren. His heart gave a squeeze at the thought of the green-eyed brat.

“Eh, is that Shortie?” He heard someone say and before he could pinpoint whose voice did it belong to, a sight of the familiar freckled-faced woman greeted him. She was already in her casual clothes and the raven figured that she was just about to get out.

“Where’s Mike?” he asked her.

She raised an eyebrow and remarked, “Why would you be looking for Mike instead of Eren? Don’t tell me you got bored of him?”

That sparked something in his nerves but he realized that this woman was as blunt as someone could get. Before he could think of lashing out to Eren’s friend, a short blonde woman came into his field of vision.

“Ymir!” Her voice sounded scolding and she turned to Levi with an apologetic expression on her face while the woman named Ymir merely scratched her nose. “I’m sorry if she’s being rude (Levi had to bite his tongue from following a retort), she’s just always like that but she doesn’t mean harm.”

He tapped his foot impatiently; he didn’t really have time to stand around like this when he should be going to that messy brunet of his right now. He repeated his question to the nicer girl, “Do you know where is the owner of the bakery right now?”

Her face lit up, probably thinking that Levi had already forgiven the rudeness of that Ymir, and she answered, “Mike is out today but he’ll come back tomorrow. Right, Ymir?”

The dark-skinned woman sighed and looked at Levi. “Yeah. He said that he has some business to take care of.”

He narrowed his eyes at that, already formulating a guess of what could the baker be doing behind the scenes at that moment. He briefly heard the girls bid goodbye to ‘Hitch,’ the cashier.

“Aren’t you supposed to be going home now, Krista?” He heard Ymir ask.

The blonde smiled sheepishly and said, “I really would rather stay out right now.”

Ymir laughed at that and put an arm around Krista’s shoulders as they walked away from Levi. “Then, let’s go to an arcade!”

There was that sting again. He couldn’t help but think that that should be him and Eren right now.

_That brat better be ready for me._

 

* * *

 

He did plan to look for Eren after he spent time in trying to find Mike but that ended up in vain. He phoned Erwin and the damn blonde didn’t tell him anything because of some procedure that they needed to follow—some FBI shit. Levi wanted to curse Erwin because secrecy was something he really _needed_ right now. Not. He was already done with all the lies and with all these secrets, but most of all he was tired of thinking of how could he possibly find Eren in the middle of the night in the fucking city.

This day couldn’t get worse.

Oh, how wrong he was.

He hit his brake when he spotted a familiar mop of brunet coming out from an area between the buildings. There were honks from behind him and he merely cursed, “Fuck you if you think I’m letting that brat go.” He was about to drive around to chase after Eren but the sight of another man coming out from the alley made his eyes widen. His adrenaline kicked in, as if this was a life-or-death situation and it probably was—if something were to happen to _his_ Eren, he didn’t know if he would be able to forgive himself. He finally drove and he silently prayed that there would be no cars around the block because getting stuck in traffic would be bad. As in bad, like he would totally leave his car in the middle of the road and run after Eren.

It looked like his prayer was answered because he was able to maneuver around with speed that was allowed on this kind of road. He knew that this would be the place where Eren would come to, based on where he was running earlier. Levi remembered that he purposely put a baseball bat inside his trunk in case of emergency, so that was what he got out when he left the car. What he didn’t expect was for a certain face to come in sight, too. _Ah, am I seeing things or the horseface is with Eren?_

He saw Eren halted in his track and Levi’s eyes fell upon those green ones. The throbbing in his chest was gone, but there was that loud beating like drums being struck really hard and it was making him weak on his knees. He gripped the bat in his hand and Eren’s eyes never stray away from his, it was as if the brat couldn’t believe that Levi had manifested right in front of him. Levi knew because he was feeling that way too. It had been already three days since the last time he saw Eren, and that was when he pulled away from Levi—when Eren left him in the beach, in the rain. He wasn’t asking for sympathy but the way he saw the brat’s eyes water, he knew that the brunet was thinking of the same thing. Of how _painful_ it was. If Levi knew that it would ache this much, then he would’ve prepared himself more. But that would be a lie now, wouldn’t it? After he found out that Eren was the one who needed him the most right now, there was already no thoughts of turning back from this—from _this love_ that sprouted from one strange encounter. He thought that Fate had plans for them the moment they met each other, and Levi couldn’t believe that he fell in love with this… college student who did amazing art, who had a habit of running in the morning when he couldn’t fall back asleep, who liked getting coffee from the same shop that Levi always went to, who cared about his friends a lot—the one who loved Levi with all his heart.

And suddenly, he knew, he realized, that there was no way that he would get out of this even if he was given the choice to. He already fell this deep and hard for Eren damn Jaeger and the first thing that he would do would be to knock some sense to him, like what Erwin and Hanji did for him. He would tell him—

_How could you think that I’m not strong enough to stand next to you?_

And then Levi would definitely protect Eren with all he got.

But first thing first: he needed to get rid of that horseface standing _too close_ to his Eren. Scratch that, the man with the bowler hat behind them first.

“Fucking duck, horseface,” he yelled out before swinging the bat from behind him and taking aim. Damn, those lessons on handling a gun could really be useful right now. Though, the difference was that a bat could crack one head open.

Yeah, he really could use some aim right now, and probably make Eren fall in love with him all over again.

_Because there’s no way I’m letting you go, brat._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> LOL how dare I cut the chapter there XD I hope that it alleviated some of your spirits, knowing that Levi is finally 'there' ya know XD saving his reckless selfless brat ;) stay tuned for the next one~ I promise you that there's DEFINITELY going to be a major Ereri moment!


	23. What Love Is For The Two of Them

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Their meeting continues. Feelings are heard. Truths are unraveled. Emotions are reciprocated. Fear is finally overcame with love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OMFGGGGGG IT'S THE 30TH?! I'M SORRY. I THOUGHT I UPDATED OMG SORRY BUT I HOPE THIS CHAPTER MAKES UP FOR EVERYTHING.
> 
> Aaaaaaand the rating goes up for this chapter so if you don't wanna see it, just skip the last part (you'll know when it starts, trust me) . I really am a novice with this stuff (first time writing a Riren/Ereri fic - first time writing a story that is not all about high school love) sooooo yeah. Hoping this doesn't get hate TvT

**I don’t own SnK**

* * *

 

"You know it's love when all you want is that person to be happy, even if you're not part of their happiness."

_— Julia Roberts_

* * *

**~Chapter Twenty-Three: What Love Is For The Two of Them~**

           

Did you ever have that moment when all of a sudden, everything slowed down—like, not literally, but you knew that there was something different about how a situation played out right in front of you. Because Eren definitely had that moment.

Right when his teal eyes caught something silver, his nerves suddenly rattled in nervousness because there were two things that he was very familiar with that he associated with that hue: that certain Maserati and those eyes. And when he caught that familiar black hair with an undercut, he felt his heart stop. He wasn’t even aware that his feet halted in their tracks too because all he saw was that face—that face that he didn’t see for three days.

It seemed unbelievable because he had never been away from that person for that long—heck, they were always together that he could have sworn he saw him 24/7 the past few months. But what made it even more surreal was the fact that this person that appeared right in front of his eyes was the same one whose heart he had broken with lies and betrayal. He convinced himself that it was for the greater good—that he would be able to save the people he loved as long as kept them at an arm’s length. But… _that’s not true at all, isn’t it?_

Not seeing Levi even for a second was painful, but thinking of the reason of why Eren couldn’t see him was like a punch in the gut—it was his reality now. He broke up with him, turned away from him, because that was his decision. It was to protect Levi from the truth that could potentially break him, but would that be another lie on Eren’s part because it wasn’t the entire truth? _Isn’t it also because I wouldn’t be able to look Levi in the eye knowing that his family—the one that carries the same blood as he does—is the one who killed my mother?_

He had also avoided Mikasa these past few days and he wasn’t even sure how did he manage to do that because if there was one thing that he was sure of, it was the fact that Mikasa would go to the other end of the ocean just for him. He couldn’t believe that she agreed to give him his space when he told her that he was staying with a friend (Jean had begged him not to tell Mikasa that he was staying with him because he was afraid that she would murder him in his sleep) and was trying to sort out his problems. He knew that Mikasa also had some limits in her patience so he figured that she would crack in a couple more days before she could mow down his apartment and his neighborhood to look for him.

But he didn’t expect for _that_ person to find him first.

Those gray eyes were focused on him like they were only seeing him and him alone. It made his heart squeeze almost painfully. He missed him. He missed him so much that it took every ounce of his strength not to run to him right now and kiss the hell out of him. What took his breath away was that shine in those eyes as they remained staring at him—there was something familiar in them that almost made Eren want to cry.

Love.

Adoration.

Longing.

Levi was looking at him with the same fascination in his eyes the day when the older man had first taken him to the rollercoaster. He was looking at him with the same passion that he had whenever he talked about their future and their times together as shown on their wall of memories.

Levi was looking at him with so much love, which Eren believed he didn’t deserve.

How could he look at him like that when Eren had done nothing but break his heart? How could he adore and love him when Eren hid everything from him and practically lied to his face? How could Levi be there right in front of him when there was so much pain that Eren had created for both of them?

He was snapped out of his trance when those lips opened and spoke, _“Fucking duck, horseface.”_

And a bat came flying towards Jean.

           

* * *

 

Jean was able to duck and Eren’s eyes followed the object thrown into the air until it grazed Jean’s hair and was actually caught by someone else’s face. And that someone happened to be the one who was wearing a bowler hat and the very same person who had been chasing the two of them before Eren entered his hypnotic state of mind. Now that he thought about it, what happened was really dangerous.

He gasped when the man audibly fell on his back and it was a good thing that there were only a few people around this area because he didn’t think that it would be a good thing once someone started calling 911. Well, Mike could possibly get them out of this situation but he’d rather not deal with the question of _why the hell is Levi here_.

“What the fuck?! Were you trying to kill me?!” He heard the incredulous question, which was obviously directed to Levi even though Jean wasn’t the one who was clutching his face in pain right now.

Eren stepped back from the man whose hat had fallen on the sidewalk and was trying to stand up but the brunet doubted that he would be able to do that when the person looked like he was writhing in pain. _Where the fuck did Levi get that bat from?_ He wanted to ask that as the said object rolled away from them and towards the doorstep of a random store, but he wasn’t sure he would be able to trust his own voice right now—not when it was constricting because he was having this urge to cry. He held it though.

He saw Jean scrambling back on his feet and _holy shit,_ he _’s coming over here_. Eren visibly swallowed and he could tell that his friend was trying to cover him with his back, practically shielding him away from Levi’s sight. But he didn’t know whether to be grateful to Jean or not. He wanted to see Levi but at the same time he also wanted him to leave. At the thought of leaving, he was suddenly pulled out of his thoughts again and he hurried to the side of the man who was contorting in his own physical suffering.

“Eren! Stay away from him1” Jean yelled out to him and Eren glanced at him and saw that he was about to go to his side; however, the sudden movement right behind Jean almost made his eyes widen and he jolted in surprise. Levi was definitely striding fast towards him and Eren knew that neither he nor Jean would be able to stop him.

Jean didn’t manage to put a fight against the shorter man and he probably knew the moment they had a stare-down at the café that one fateful morning that Jean wasn’t capable of challenging Levi. He already occupied too much of Eren’s heart and there was no way of getting the two of them back together. But the brunet knew that getting back together with Levi was the only wish he had right now. He couldn’t even think about the reason on why were they even separated in the first place, until the man lying on the pavement suddenly sat up straight and tried to take a swing at Eren. He managed to dodge the punch, thanks to his good reflexes, and he almost missed the look of raging fury that passed on Levi’s face when he saw what the man had tried to do to Eren.

Levi was definitely coming to them with burst of anger radiating from a mile radius around him, and Eren was suddenly scared that he would totally beat up the man who was now trying to get away from them. The lawyer was having none of that though; he instantly put pressure on his designer shoe as he stepped on the man’s chest, which was heaving in probable fear.

“Who the fuck are you?” Levi seethed, gray eyes were now flashing with violence and anger. Eren was afraid that he wouldn’t be able to stop Levi if he started bashing the man with his raw fists, which was what prompted him to stand up and stand as a barrier between the two men.

“Levi, don’t,” he pleaded, choking up on the name that he used to call out a thousand times. There was no way he would want a bloodshed right in front of him—he knew that he wouldn’t be able to take seeing that same color again. He almost regretted stopping the lawyer because those eyes finally shifted back to him, and he could have sworn that Levi was ready to drag him out of there because of the desperation he saw in his eyes. He didn’t know why Levi was there but he was almost certain that the raven had heard something about this whole business that Eren was involved into.

The man was getting back up on a stance but Jean, the one who was conscious of what was truly happening and wasn’t having communication problems with an _ex_ , was quick enough to put the stranger on his knees as he struggled futilely. Eren looked back and he almost choked on his own spit when he saw the man bleeding, red liquid was streaming from his hairline down to the side of his face. Levi seemed to move when the man started speaking.

“You’re a Jaeger, aren’t you? You’re the Doctor’s son,” he said.

The brunet wasn’t surprised that the man knew him for this was the reason why he and Jean were moving cautiously with the help of some FBI. He just didn’t expect that he would be found this soon—after all, he did manage to remain hidden for five freaking years. A hope for a week’s safety shouldn’t hurt but apparently wasn’t possible. _Seems like Rod Reiss doesn’t want to waste any more time._

Jean was gripping the man’s shoulders so that he would remain on the ground and Eren was sure that the stranger wasn’t one of Reiss’s men for nothing. He would probably appear weak when they least expected him to and Eren might not be a strategist but he had been into a lot of fights to know that this man in front of him was trying to get information out of them before he could save himself—or possible hurt them. He hoped that he wasn’t hiding his gun beneath his belt.

“Your father—he passed on information about _that_ , didn’t he?” the man tried again and Eren was weighing his options of maintaining his silence or playing along with this sick game. “Eren Jaeger,” he smiled crookedly, “we know who you are.”

“That’s right, I’m Eren Jaeger. And I’m assuming that you’re one _his_ men?” he finally spoke and he could tell that Jean was about to protest by how his opened his mouth big to probably yell at him. But the man chuckled sinisterly and looked Eren right in the eye.

“I can’t believe that a brat like you had managed to evade us for so long.”

He narrowed his eyes and answered, “Maybe his men are just incompetent, couldn’t even manage to finish off one brat, eh?” He smirked, knowing that provocation would be the best way to pull out the needed information out of the man. Jean seemed to close his mouth—Eren figured that he was smart to know the gist of the situation. Levi, whose presence seemed to be emanating heat to Eren (he didn’t know how did he manage to avoid looking at him at the moment), was clenching his fists on his sides. He knew that the lawyer was probably mad and frustrated, because he had no clue what was going on—at least not the whole thing—and he was probably itching to punch the man who was clearly waving off signals that pretty much said he was a clear danger to Eren.

The man laughed loudly and obnoxiously and Eren almost burst in fury at the next words he uttered.

“Wouldn’t say that if we got to finish off the Doctor’s wife, _your mother_ , right?”

He gritted his teeth. If there was one thing he couldn’t do right now, it would be to let his anger win over his state of mind because he would fuck this whole thing up if he did. That was why he did something that he thought he wouldn’t be able to do—to calm down. That was probably the wisest thing that he had managed to do because something clicked in his mind.

“But there’s no victory for you if the one who can destroy everything is alive and talking right in front of you now, isn’t that right, Nile Dawk?” He wasn’t certian if it was the man’s name, for all he knew this man could be a different hit-man under Rod Reiss, but there was that nagging feeling that he could only be the one directly going after Eren because he was one of the few that was mentioned in his father’s video.

Needless to say, the widening of the man’s eyes was the indication that he was right. Nile then bent his head downwards, facing the sidewalk, and Eren knew that that would be the moment the man would show his true colors. He was a second too late when Nile suddenly swept his leg under Jean’s, who was right behind him, and his friend almost hit his head on the cemented ground if not for his arms catching his fall. Levi moved but Eren was faster and he couldn’t believe that the day would come when he was thankful for the brawls in his high school days because they were really handy right now.

He lurched his leg to make a clean kick to Nile’s jaw but it never collided to the target because the man rolled on his back and retreated to a safe distance from Eren. If he was about pull his gun out, he hesitated. Eren didn’t know why but it was most likely because they weren’t exactly in a secluded place. Levi was about to go and confront his opponent but Eren raised his arm in front of him without looking at him.

“This is my fight. Please, step back.”

And he surged to the man like a bull seeing red. Nile attempted to duck but Eren raised his leg and twisted his body to gain momentum as he delivered a successful kick on Nile’s side. The man almost crumpled in pain again, and Eren could almost hear his blood sing in exhilaration. _It’s been a while since I get to fight like this_. He could almost hear the sounds of rods clashing with each other and bones cracking under the pressure of punches and kicks and he could almost hear the hollers and the cries as teens started to go down. He was almost drowned in his past and his clenched fist hit the Nile’s jaw with a sickening crunch. He was oblivious to the shuffling behind him and before he could seriously damage Nile’s physical well being, he felt a strong grip on his right shoulder and that made him stop in his movements.

“Eren, stop,” Levi told him in a calm voice. And that was enough for him to put his hands down and glare at Nile who stumbled back on the sidewalk. He didn’t even get to land a single hit on Eren, and the young man was almost proud of that. Almost.

“Eren.” It was a different yet familiar voice this time and he immediately turned around to face Mike whose gaze was steady on him.    “We took care of the rest of his friends. Let me take him to custody.”

“They know,” he muttered, eyes were falling on Mike’s shoes. “They know I’m alive.”

“So I’ve gathered.”

Nile would probably not be able to move for a while but Eren wanted nothing else but to get what they needed from him. At the same time, he also wished that there was a way for this to be decently civil without unnecessary force to make Nile talk—he was sure that this man was loyal to Rod Reiss than anyone else.

“Levi,” he heard Mike call out and it prompted him to look up. “Take Eren home. Jean, you can also go home or you can come with me back to the station.”

Jean who was on the sideline gave Eren a look and he didn’t want to know what the hell it meant but he was sure that it was somewhere along the lines of “are you sure you’re going to be okay.” But he knew that after witnessing all that, Levi would have questions and doubts about their previous encounter. Therefore, he nodded to Jean to tell him that he could go.

“I’ll go with you,” Jean told Mike who gave a slight nod to his direction. The agent hauled Nike to his feet with some assistance from Jean and the man was almost about to pass out. Eren couldn’t bring himself to care because in the end, he would probably not going to be able to find out what would happen now since Levi was there. _Right there_ , just a foot away from him.

Jean was still looking back at Eren as he dragged Nile back to the black vehicle that Mike had driven to get here, and before Eren could call the FBI agent back, he felt Levi shift next to him. He should’ve asked Mike why the hell Levi was there and if he could possible know anything about this. He didn’t expect the raven to actually speak soon though.

“Let’s go home.”

 _Home._ It ought to sound foreign to him now but that was not the case at all. It sent an influx of butterflies in his stomach and the warmth spreading in his chest was nothing but familiar and pleasant to him. He wasn’t certain if it was merely a slipup on Levi’s part but… he really missed it— _their_ home. But he dreaded the moment Levi would tell him what he actually knew about any of this. It was bad enough for him to show up in such a situation but for Eren to hear him say those words that could possibly be “I know,” it would destroy his resolve.

His resolve to not see Levi anymore.

Because there was only one thing that he wanted to do and that was for him to hold Levi in his arms and plant feathery kisses on his lips, like what he used to do. But not anymore.

He restrained himself and followed Levi who began walking back towards his car. There was really no use of protesting against it anymore—there was no longer a reason for him to continue fighting against this unthinkable fate. He opened his car for Eren and the younger went inside tentatively. There was a tense silence in the car after Levi’s car door slammed shut and Eren forced his eyes to remain fixated on the sidewalk outside his window to prevent himself from looking at Levi. The stillness inside the car was broken when Levi started to fire the engine on and he drove in the quietness enveloping them.

The sight of the two-story white house had Eren on the edge. After all, this was supposedly his home before everything blew up. Levi parked his car and got out. Eren followed suit, not wanting for the raven to open the door for him because he didn’t want to open up an early interaction between them. He wasn’t ready yet. He was gestured to come inside the house and he suddenly felt more of a guest than a familiar member, not just because of the situation but because of the sight that greeted him too.  

Clothes were haphazardly thrown away on the floor, a towel was hanging on the couch, broken pieces of minty green glass were scattered near the window, and _oh_ the window was opened. A blurred figure caught his eye and he watched as Levi hurriedly snatched the button-up shirt from the floor. Eren’s heart hammered in his chest. _It’s not my business if he actually brought someone here_ , but the throbbing that his heart was giving him was really hurting him. He wasn’t aware that he was putting on a strange expression on his face, not until Levi finally broke the silence between them.

“It’s not what it looks like.”

He was reminded once again that he disliked being an open book, because Levi definitely saw right through him. He attempted to hide his face with his growing bangs but that didn’t stop the lawyer from stepping closer to him. He noticed that Levi was clutching the clothes in his hand very tightly to the point that they could rip, and Eren didn’t want to look up but he couldn’t help it.

He met those silver eyes again and he could see pain reflected on them.

“I’m sorry if I gave you the wrong impression of this,” he sort of shook the clothes he was holding, “this…is actually my doing.” Eren must have looked confused at that statement and Levi elaborated with a click of his tongue, “I threw them in the living room and didn’t get to clean it.”

Eren was so surprised that he couldn’t stop his eyebrows from rising and Levi grunted, maybe from annoyance, before he trudged back to the couch and silently put the clothes back on the ground in a cleaner manner. Though, Levi would’ve probably already gone to the laundry room if Eren weren’t there. The brunet didn’t know what to do but he was beckoned to sit too and he purposely sat away from Levi because he didn’t think that he would be able to bear being close to him yet. His self-restraint might snap and he might confess everything to him right here and there.

The sound of Levi shifting on his seat made Ear’s perked up and he reluctantly moved his eyes towards him again.

“I heard from Erwin,” he said. Eren sucked in his breath and nervously exhaled it out. Levi had a firm look in his eyes and he willed Eren’s green eyes to remain on him. He leaned into his knees, propping his arms on his thighs casually, but there was nothing really casual about this conversation that they were about to have.

“…What exactly did you hear?” he asked, clasping his fingers between his spread-out knees. Levi silently put an arm on the sofa and crossed his leg over the other, as if this conversation didn’t bother him a bit. Eren would’ve believed that if not for the twitch between his eyebrows and the slight tremble of his fingers.

“I heard about your mom. That she was…” Levi trailed off, and Eren knew then. Erwin hadn’t heard about the recent discovery that Eren brought to Mike and he silently thanked his boss for not telling him. It was hard enough to hide that one piece of information from them, which was really the most important one, and he didn’t need one more scary man to follow him with a sling around his arm.

“That she was murdered,” Eren finished for him. He repeated the statement in his head a thousand times before until it was merely a numb pain in his brain. But saying it in front of Levi was a different kind of thing—because his uncle was…

“…Why didn’t you tell me?”

Eren closed his eyes after he saw a brief flash of pain behind those gray eyes. He then said, “Because I didn’t want you to know.”

“Why?” Levi breathed out silently.

“Rod Reiss will go after the ones that I love and care about.”

“Did you—,” Levi shuddered out a breath, “did you really think that I’m that weak?”

Eren gripped his hands together to stop the pain from coming on so strongly, but it was unstoppable. He swallowed the bile down his throat and answered, “It’s because I don’t want to see someone I love die in front of my eyes ever _again_.”

An audible gasp was what he heard and he strained his ears to hear the subtle movements that Levi was making adjacent to him. He was suddenly glad that he sat on a different couch—he didn’t think he would be able to deal with the reaction that Levi was giving him now.

“What do you mean?” Levi asked, unsure of what he was really asking and Eren almost gave in. “You…Don’t tell me…”

Silence. And Eren looked at him square in eye and told him the most devastating memory he could ever remember in his entire life.

“I saw my mom die right in front of my very eyes. I saw her lying there and bleeding her life away, Levi.”

The air stilled and Eren exhaled out a shuddering air of breath. He was painfully aware that Levi was moving but he wasn’t expecting him to wrap his arms around him. Those arms that were always so protective of him—they had provided him comfort and security, shielding him away from the cruel reality of the world before he finally opened his eyes to the truth. There was that warmth that only Levi could give him—it was the kind of heat that made him lean even closer to his body as much as possible.

Levi suddenly trembled and Eren was tempted to look at the raven if not for the strong arms preventing him from doing so. The lawyer’s chest was lifting up and down forcibly and Eren went rigid at the thought of this beautiful man crying _for_ him. It was enough for him to weep like the broken man he truly was and he didn’t fight the strong desire to wound his own arms around Levi’s waist. And both of them poured the tears that they kept from each other since that day they separated.

“I want…I want to tell you everything. I’m so sorry that I l-lied to you and I hid everything from you because I thought…I thought I could protect you,” he sobbed out, trying his best to sound coherent despite his voice being muffled on Levi’s shirt. “I don’t want to expose you to any danger, Levi.”

“Eren,” the raven called out, pulling away slightly to gaze on those green eyes. “I’ll never leave you. I won’t leave your side even if you tell me that you don’t care about me anymore. I’ll continue to watch over you even if you tell me that you don’t love me anymore. That’s why, you don’t need to be afraid.” He stroke Eren’s cheeks with tender love and full of sincerity. “Let me protect you, too.”

His eyes watered at those words and he nodded. Levi pressed his forehead on his before he lifted it away and a pair of soft lips replaced it. It only made Eren cry harder. He believed that he didn’t deserve to be treated this way—Levi was too forgiving and gentle for his own good. But Eren wanted this. He wanted to be together with Levi again. He wanted him to be his again and for Eren to be Levi’s again.

And Eren finally told him. He told him when it all started, from the bakery incident to how Mike revealed what he knew about his mom, to the time he gave up on it then picked up where he left off as he collected more evidence. He didn’t tell Levi what triggered his memories, but he told him that he regained what he had lost five years ago on the night he witnessed the death of his mother. He didn’t want to tell him not because of the reasons he had before—but he wanted for Levi to unravel that truth himself. He explained his plan to expose Reiss’s black market with his dad’s flash drive and the material from his art professor, Pixis. Levi was attentively listening the entire time, not missing any detail that came from Eren’s mouth. His brat was finally opening up to him and Eren felt that relief of a boulder being lifted off his shoulders as he finished his story.

“You really are an idiot,” Levi suddenly said and Eren felt slight pain when the older man flicked his forehead with enough force to make it red. The brunet was about to protest but he was smothered with another hug, which was something he welcomed with both arms. Levi was now sitting on the armrest of the sofa that Eren was sitting on but it seemed like he couldn’t care.

“But—” he started but was cut off.

“Doing all that to protect me wouldn’t make me happy. Even Mikasa and Armin would probably fucking shove your ass out of the window for ever thinking that you could put your life in danger for our sake. But,” Levi paused and squeezed him tight. “I’m glad you’re still alive. No matter how tempting it is to pulverize your reckless ass for doing that.”

The younger man chuckled and his eyes dropped closed. He inhaled that comforting scent of his lover—he certainly hoped that he could still call him that but he wasn’t about to go there when there were more pressing matters in hand.

Nonetheless, it was good to be home.

It was good to be back in the arms of the person he loved with all his heart.

 

* * *

 

Eren’s eyes fluttered open with a silent groan as he started to wake up. He tried to roll on his side but was immediately stopped by an arm hanging idly over his waist and he noticed that his back was against something warm and firm. He carefully turned his head around until his eyes caught that familiar black locks swept away, revealing Levi’s closed eyes. He wanted to completely move around to admire him, even if the skin around the lawyer’s eyes were kinda red from the crying session they had hours ago. The sun wasn’t up yet so it could only mean that the day was only approaching dawn or it was just few hours past midnight.

He remembered cuddling with Levi before they both fell asleep in exhaustion. They did a lot of talking—more than they had ever done before, which was something he didn’t expect but not unwanted. When he had asked what did Levi feel—and he had to be honest about it—when he left him, the raven told him that he felt betrayed, not because of Eren’s act of leaving him, but because he didn’t tell Levi anything. The lawyer seemed like he wanted Eren to promise him that he wouldn’t lie or hide anything from him anymore, but Eren was quick in compromising something that he wouldn’t break.

_“I promise that I’m not going to leave your side anymore, Levi. No matter what situation we’re in, I won’t leave you. And I won’t ever stop loving you.”_

He still couldn’t tell him that Levi’s uncle was the one who killed his mother. No, it wasn’t that he wouldn’t do it—but he knew that it wasn’t his place to say it. Levi had to face that truth himself, but all that Eren was certain about was that he would be by his side when the time comes.

A grunt cut him off his reverie and he finally turned his body around so that he was facing Levi. The sight of the love of his life right in front of him was something that he wanted to capture forever and he regretted the fact that he didn’t have his camera right now. He could’ve added this on their wall of memories.

_But this is something that will always be in my memories._

He was unconsciously tracing marks on Levi’s bare arm dangling around his waist when his world suddenly spun around as he felt himself being pinned down on the soft mattress. His green eyes widened because Levi’s face—and now fully opened eyes—was merely an inch away from his.

“L-Levi!” he yelped in surprise.

“Morning, Love,” Levi said back and Eren suspected that he was half-asleep. Though, no one should be this strong when they were almost dozing off.

“U-Uh, it’s not really—” Eren started but was cut off as a pair of lips descended upon him. Those soft pink lips that he missed—they were now lazily mouthing light kisses on Eren’s lips and he suddenly didn’t care anymore if both of them were still dreaming or if it was still dark outside. He couldn’t help but lift his arms around Levi’s neck, which was really warm, and he pulled him closer, flushing their bodies together. It was hot but Eren didn’t mind it. He wanted this moment to be engraved in his memories and therefore, he would never forget it.

He knew exactly when the kiss turned more heated and intoxicating—it was when Levi’s arms collapsed on either side of the brunet’s head and they were practically molded together into one with a two-layer of clothing between them. His lips were suddenly firm and hard on Eren’s and Levi began biting his bottom lip, which led to his first sensual moan. That was probably what urged the raven on to bite more and slip his tongue into Eren’s warm cavern, seeking desperately for the other. The brunet let his eagerness take over and he entangled his own tongue with his other half’s and the groan that Levi emitted inside his mouth made his body tingle in more ways than he could imagine. The hairs on the back of his neck stood as sounds of wet smacking lips reached his ears. He was also sure that his cheeks resembled a red rose right now.

“Eren.”

The sound of his name coming from his lover’s lips prompted him to pull away to get a proper look at Levi. He was aroused—Eren could tell by the hardening length pressing on his thigh—and those tinted pink cheeks adorning Levi’s pale face, his hooded eyes with irises looking like they were molten silver in the dark but Eren could mostly see his pupils blown wide with want and love, they definitely did something to Eren’s body that he had never thought of before he had met Levi. It reminded him of France, where they gave their first times to each other and it made him smile.

“Levi,” he breathed out, only noticing now that he was slightly out of breath. He made sure that he looked at him with equal emotions presented in Levi’s eyes before he said, “Make love to me.”

He got more than he asked for because Levi’s smile was definitely the world for him. He kissed Eren’s forehead and whispered softly and lovingly, “Yes, my Love.”

Levi pecked his lips once more before he felt him kiss everything on his face—the side of his mouth, his nose, his forehead once more, the outline of his jaw, and then around his eyes. Eren felt his senses heightened as Levi did this, and he was almost sure that his body was on fire but at the same time, he felt light and even more relaxed. No matter how many times they had sex before, he wouldn’t be able to get past this incredible sensation nor did he ever want to. He wanted to feel everything, the soft touches that Levi left on his skin as his fingers grazed the sides of his body before they finally held the hem of Eren’s shirt. Levi carefully and slowly lifted the fabric off his body, leaving him bare, and the man peppered his stomach with light kisses as he went along. When the shirt was finally removed, Eren was granted permission to take off Levi’s when the raven leaned back a bit.

Eren latched his arms around Levi’s shoulders and the raven took that opportunity to attach his mouth on the brunet’s neck, inhaling and sucking that supple flesh. He was sure that Levi was marking him as _his_ again—the days they were away from each other felt like years—and Eren did the same. More marks were left on the top of his body, next to his pink and perked nipples, his lean stomach, his sides, and his chest. It wasn’t just because Levi was possessive, which was still true, but Eren had an inkling that it was also Levi’s way of telling him that he had loved him all the same but most likely even more than possible.

And Eren couldn’t help the tears of happiness that Levi caught with his lips.

“Je suis amoureux de toi, Eren. _Je t’aime_.”

And Eren knew how to answer that now.

“I’m very much in love with you, too, Levi,” he replied back with a smile.

Levi took off the bottom half of their clothes and they were both exposed to each other. No one wasted time to feel what was theirs and what they had missed. Their scorching touches elicited pleasant moans and groans. They savored every moment and when Levi touched his length, Eren feared that he would pass out of overstimulation. Out of all times he made love with Levi, this was by far the most engaging one. He could feel every heartbeat coming from Levi and the sweat that trickled down his spine as he moved closer to Eren, pushing back the tan legs apart with gentle caresses, brushing the insides of his thighs, which made Eren keen with want. He felt him move his legs and Eren got the hint so he hastily wrapped them around Levi’s waist, rubbing their erections together and making both of them hiss with pleasure and anticipation.

“Levi— _hah_ —Levi. Hurry.”

“Shh. There’s no need to rush, Love,” he assured him. And something wet and long slowly slipped inside him. Eren moaned and attempted to grab Levi’s face but the raven caught his hand and kissed the inside of his wrist. Eren let himself push back to the finger that turned into two then three. They were pulled out with an erotic wet pop and Eren whined at the loss of something filling inside him.

A second later, he felt something pressed against his entrance. He moaned ever so loudly that he was afraid he had woken up someone, suddenly thinking that he was back in his apartment where there were many neighbors who could be disturbed by someone’s loud sex next door, before he remembered that he was _really_ at Levi’s house—his home—and that this was actually _real._

“Eren, breathe.”

And he inhaled before he felt the flesh poking his hole finally breached it. He almost cried out, partly because of that electrifying mixture of pleasure and pain singing in his veins right now, and Levi almost stopped because he thought that he hurt him in some way. Eren was having none of that though, because he promptly let himself be penetrated further by pulling that body between his legs even closer. Levi finally got the hint and he thrusted in slowly, easing the probable remnants of pain, until his hipbones were pressing on Eren’s ass. They were very close right now, and Eren took the advantage of their proximity to deliver a deep kiss to the man making love to him. It wasn’t long until Levi began to move slowly in and out, still careful and Eren began to feel the impatience inside him.

“I’m not gonna break, Levi. I’m not going to disappear. Make love to me the way you want to claim me,” he finally told him.

And Levi listened to him. He pulled out his arousal until Eren could only feel the head inside him, leaving him reeling at the feeling of being empty, before the man slammed back inside him. Eren opened his mouth in a silent scream and his blood was rushing in pure pleasure. Levi then began to move. He wasn’t gentle anymore and his thrusts made Eren moan wantonly and grip the sheets above his head tightly as Levi pounded into him. The bed creaked under the pressure, overworking it and Eren could hear it. He could hear his heart, Levi’s groans and grunts, and his own screams, begging for his lover to be _faster_ and _harder,_ that he couldn’t believe had belonged to him.

“Levi, I—I’m close.”

It only took a few jerks with Levi’s hand around his own length before white strings of liquid flew onto his stomach, rubbing it on Levi’s. And he felt his insides instinctively clenched around that hot rod inside him and Levi increased his pace even faster than before and Eren used his remaining strength to rut back to him. The warmness that filled him afterwards made him shout and his insides were convulsing, claiming every last bit of Levi.

There was that sense of completeness afterwards, having Levi pulled out and cleaned them by himself, which Eren insisted that he should do himself but the raven merely shook his head and thoroughly wiped off the mess with the tissues placed on the nightstand and Eren chuckled because Levi’s sense of cleanliness was finally back, and their arms were around each other again. Chest against chest, cheek against cheek, legs entangled—it looked so comical that Eren wanted to laugh and when he did, Levi merely shook his head, apparently amused, and put his lips on his neck.

“I don’t know what time is it but now I’m tired again. Goodnight, Levi,” he whispered softly right next to his lover’s ear.

“Goodnight, brat.”

He smiled and flushed their bodies even closer when he heard the other statement from his other half.

“I love you.”

Their actions proved to be as strong as their words could be, but Eren knew that saying those three words could mean the world to him.

“I love you, too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I swear, while I was typing this chapter, my heart was like fluttering (and no, I'm okay. Really. No medical issues as far as I know XD) because like... yeah because of this damn couple! I'm sorry if you didn't enjoy the last scene but I wanted to show how their bond together has strengthened in a lot of ways - mentally, emotionally, and physically. What's after this? You'll find out. OMG. I realized that we ARE approaching the end *looks away* whoops.


	24. An Impending Danger

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He's finally happy that his love is back to him again. But reality has to come around and sweep him off his happiness, reminding him of what the real danger is.

**I don’t own SnK**

* * *

_“A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows that you are slightly cracked.”_

_—Bernard Meltzer_

* * *

 

**~Chapter Twenty-Four: An Impending Danger~**

He could see bright orange behind his eyelids and before Levi could process what he was doing, he was already squinting at the brightness of the sunlight that greeted him. He groaned loudly, expressing his extreme displeasure for having his curtains opened like this early in the morning. He noted that he didn’t wake up to his alarm clock, which could only mean that he didn’t have work today or he completely slept through it. At the latter thought he hastily turned around to face the ceiling, his hand instinctively coming to the other side of his large bed to grab onto something—or _someone_.

And he didn’t think he felt his heart drop so fast until his hand came in contact with the empty bed sheet.

Maybe he just dreamed of it—dreamed of coming to rescue Eren and his Eren telling him everything that he had been dying to know ever since Erwin had finally said _something_. Maybe it was just his mind coping with the loneliness and the pain that he had been dealing the past few days that it decided to make him think that he had felt Eren around him—his skin rubbing on Levi’s, his lips firm and passionate on his, the brush of his eyelashes on his cheeks.

Maybe he actually didn’t hear Eren say that he loved him over and over again last night.

Then, his nose suddenly got a whiff of something…

Burning.

Levi got up so fast that he forgot that he would get dizzy so he spent a couple of seconds trying to figure out which foot was to go on the floor first, though that shouldn’t really matter because he was running down his staircase with his opposite slippers on. And his eyes widened at the sight of messy brown hair sprinkled with white powder, the person flailing widely as he dropped the pan on the sink in the kitchen. The young man was only clad with black boxers and a white fluffy-looking apron, which Levi raised at eyebrow at because he certainly couldn’t remember where the hell did that type of clothing come from but he was certainly not complaining now. He slowly approached the panicked-stricken lad and he awkwardly coughed to his fist.

Eren went stiff as a rod, the muscles of his back visibly went rigid and Levi had to bite his lower lip to keep himself from giving too much away. The brunet was facing the stove, the hum of the vent could be heard, and there were white powdery stuff all over the counter, which Levi suspected was the pancake batter mix. He couldn’t even bring himself to be slightly maddened by the mess of what used to be his sparkling kitchen because he was having the best moment of his life after realizing that this was real.

It was _not_ a dream. And Eren was really back in his life.

“L-Levi…”

Eren slowly turned around, which reminded Levi of a robot nervously twisting its head around. He would’ve laughed already if not for his ever-so-striking personality, and the look of utter horror on Eren’s face was too priceless to pass up.

“What are you doing?” Levi asked, doing his best to sound nonchalant and a bit intimidating by crossing his arms over his chest. He remembered that Eren had once tried to cook for the both of them on couple of occasions and the last incident had been the one that put a stop to the bloody idea. He still couldn’t fathom how could anyone mess up one fried egg—he could still reminisce how his tongue practically exploded the minute he forked the food into his mouth and _oh_ , he surely heard the sound of his teeth biting down on a particularly hard piece of salt.

So yeah. There was a reason why Eren shouldn’t be in the kitchen.

That was Levi’s job, but why…

“I-I tried to experiment on cooking some pancakes because I really thought that I wouldn’t mess up but I somehow forgot that there’s something on the stove while I was mixing stuff in that bowl and this all happened and I’m sorry,” Eren talked so fast that Levi could only blink and walked up to the blushing tall guy. His eyes were wondering around, looking at everywhere but Levi and the raven decided that his actions would probably beat his words, _so action it is_.

“Wait—Levi…” Eren squeaked but Levi ignored it as he went to the island and tore up a piece of pancake. He tried not to cringe when his eyes caught the sight of the undeniably uncooked batter inside, though the outside looked golden brown. The brat couldn’t use the stove for the love of his life, but Levi couldn’t complain nor did he want to. To wake up with Eren doing his utmost effort to make Levi happy was something that no delicious pancakes or perfect fried eggs could do. He’d eat anything made by this person alone, even if he really did suck at cooking.

He swallowed after chewing the food a couple of times and looked at those shining green eyes. He couldn’t help but think sappily, _I feel like I’m falling for this kid all over again_. Levi had to tear his eyes away to look at the five or so pancakes littered on one big plate and he said, “Eren, will you please get me some tea while I eat these?”

He pretended not to notice the younger’s movements as he rubbed his eyes with his fingers before he heard him say, “Yeah, I’ll do that for you, Levi.”

And Levi finished the food that Eren made for him as he waited for his tea. His heart was filled with content, and he really wouldn’t trade this moment for the world.

 

* * *

 

 

When Eren had brought Levi to the hidden station of the FBI that Mike ran, he didn’t even bat an eyelash and the brunet was on the edge the entire ride going to the place. But what he still couldn’t believe was that two of his childhood friends were actually present next to him.

Mikasa was standing there, looking so calm and composed as if this wasn’t anything extraordinary at all. And Armin, well… he looked unbelievably high-strung as if he couldn’t keep his nerves to himself. If Eren didn’t know better, he would’ve thought that the blonde was super nervous right now and was probably about to bolt out to the bathroom. But Eren understood that jitter around Armin and he could say that he disliked it a bit—because Armin was _excited_. That little genius was probably formulating some hypotheses on his own the moment they had entered the arcade and he was nodding with a glazed look to Mike when he introduced himself to them.

And Eren thought he was gonna die of tension that he felt was unnecessary in the first place. He thought about it last night—that he should tell his best friends about the whole truth because they were not very far from being involved. He considered Jean’s opinion and actually listened to him, because he was right. Maybe he was just trying to selfishly protect those people he loved and maybe they didn’t really need to be kept in the dark, and Levi proved that to be true.

Eren was never happy to make a decision in his life before until last night. It was like everything finally made sense when he poured everything to Levi—every truth, every lie he had to tell him, every emotion, and every word that he wasn’t able to say that day at the beach where he turned his back on him due to his egoistical purpose. He thought he would be able to do it alone, but that really was not the case at all.

He needed them. He needed his family to give him the strength that was necessary for this battle. He needed his friends to remind him that he was human and that he could get hurt, and if he ever fell down, there would be reaching hands that were ready to support him and haul him back to his feet. And he needed Levi, because he was the only person that could make him believe in being in love and being loved in return.

Mike had explained to them about how confidential this really was but everyone had their mouths already sealed. Eren’s heart sped up at the thought that he was actually loved by everyone—to the point that they were willing to bet their lives on this case, just for Eren. Erwin and Hanji showed up an hour later and Mike went over the plan to all of them. He couldn’t help but glance at the blue sling that Erwin was carrying around. He wanted to apologize but knew that it wouldn’t be necessary because the agent would probably tell him, _“It’s part of my job.”_

His boss asked him if it was okay to show the video of his father to them and he nodded in response. Levi’s hand was on his thigh in reassurance and he smiled to him; he could see in the corner of his eye that Mikasa and Armin were looking at the two of them and they both had a small, gentle smile on their faces. Jean was sorting through papers, a job that Mike gave him, he said. There were some tense silence besides from the voice of Grisha Jaeger over the speakers and Eren let himself drink in the sight of his dad once more, which was presented by the projector.

They spend a few more hours, devising little plans to take down the Reiss Corporation. Jean’s father showed up and the son was the most embarrassed of all them as he gave out his solo monologue about justice and peace and whatnot. Eren had totally forgotten how eccentric Jean’s dad was and he couldn’t help but laugh. This scene was almost serene except from the very fact that they were discussing on how to free the innocent people trapped under that pretense of a very successful and needed company. There really should be some legal procedure to this but Mike’s team—which consisted of Mike, Erwin, and Rico Brzenska, an intelligent-looking woman—seemed to be highly regarded by the others that they could get a good number of professionals on their side with just one call. Eren was glad that he was not on their bad side and that he was actually getting assistance from them.

The plan wasn’t grand; they were, of course, reluctant to actually to do this because it was like banging their heads on the wall. Reiss was one of the most influential men they knew and he probably had some tricks up his sleeve, and Eren knew what one of them was. He didn’t share to them the idea that maybe he was the loophole—that he could be the bait because after all, he was the one that Rod Reiss had been looking for. Mike and the others would’ve reasoned out to him that they would go after all of them now because Eren had shared them this information to them. But that was the thing—they were doing a private operation. And he felt like it wasn’t sufficient enough.

When they all went home, they were already given specific roles but they were to remain quiet about it. _Do not do anything yet_ , Mike said to them—no, he _ordered_ them to. Eren wanted to protest because Jean was right, they couldn’t afford to waste any more time. But Levi was there, and that was enough encouragement that he could still live normally as he wanted before doomsday.

He went to work that night, the first time this week and Ymir and Hitch had asked him if he was sick or something. He merely went on with that excuse and clocked in. Krista was there when he came out, talking to Ymir, and Eren waved her a ‘Hi.’

“I heard that you were absent for several days, Eren. Is everything okay?” the little angel asked him and he smiled to her in response.

Even though nothing was really okay, he couldn’t let his friends think otherwise.  He didn’t want to let this situation drag him down.

“I’m fine. I’m fine. How are you?” he asked. He let the conversation flow and soon enough, they were talking about college and old stuff from high school until a customer came and Eren had to go back to his job.

“I’m going, Eren. See you tomorrow,” she cheerily said and went out of the store with Ymir. The dark-skinned woman gave him a wave over her shoulder, the object above the door chiming on their wake.

 

* * *

 

There was only one thing that Levi wanted to do, and that was to run away from his work and leave the rest to his squad. But then again he would feel bad because his thoughts were solely on one audacious young man who happened to be his boyfriend. He couldn’t stop his mind from conjuring up ideas—really bad ones—about what could be possibly happening to Eren right at this minute. He really needed to go home. Badly.

When his shift ended, contacting someone higher and telling them that he had some meeting to attend with the FBI agent Erwin Smith, he practically ran to his car. It had only been less than twenty-four hours before he had experienced the best morning of his life and yet, there was only one thing running in his mind right now. He wanted to see Eren. He wanted to make sure that his brat didn’t disappear on him again.

When he was nearing the bakery—he insisted that Eren should take the day-off but gave in when the brunet gave him one of his famous lectures about not treating him like fragile china—his phone rang. He put on his earphone after seeing that it was from Erwin; a foreboding feeling was coiling in his stomach. He had been dreading a phone call from the police department or from his FBI friend and acquaintances because they could mean one thing that he didn’t want to hear about.

But it looked like Erwin was just going to give him information.

_“We’ve got something.”_

“Yeah?”

_“Looks like Rod Reiss has a family who’s been living under a pseudonym.”_

Levi frowned. The conversation was going to a direction he didn’t like.

“What about it?”

_“It’s his daughter. Her real name is Historia Reiss, but she goes with the name Krista Lenz.”_

“…And?” Levi gripped the steering wheel harder. There was something in Erwin’s tone that told him that he had to brace himself from whatever this impeding doom was, and that name was awfully familiar, like he’d heard of it somewhere recently.

_“Krista Lenz, or should I say, Historia Reiss, is Eren’s friend. She’s one of his high school friends, Levi.”_

 

* * *

 

The clock was ticking but Mike was nowhere in sight. He wondered if he was still staying in his office, trying to check up on who would be available to infiltrate the hotel that Rod Reiss was currently staying at. Armin was in charge of hacking their systems related to security cameras and Mikasa and Jean (much to his horror) would be playing as the couple in disguise that would be getting one room—they hadn’t yet figured out who was going to pay the bill but Eren had a feeling that Levi would gladly offer. It seemed ridiculous, but they knew that this hotel that Reiss owned had one of the hidden market underground because of its well-known name around the city. How would they expose him? They just needed a direct statement from him regarding his business and the murder of Eren’s parents. Then, he would (hopefully) be behind the bars next time they would see him again.

And Eren couldn’t wait—couldn’t wait to actually get the justice that his parents deserved. He couldn’t wait until he heard the whole truth behind his father’s death, but what he didn’t want was for the death of his mother to come out. He had learned to deal with the hard truth himself, had learned the power of his emotions and what he could be motivated to do, and he was scared—scared that he would do something stupid and scared that Levi would unravel the truth. The truth that his uncle, Kenny Ackerman, was the one who killed Eren’s mother.

He was deep in his thoughts as he swept the room, waiting for that silver Maserati to park outside of the shop, that he got startled when he heard a distinct sound from outside.

Gunshot to be exact.

It brought him that dread he felt the day the bakery was first rained with bullets, and he still could remember how much he panicked and how frightened he was when he saw Mike with a bullet on his stomach. It was sickening. It was scary.

And now that he heard that familiar sound again, he couldn’t help but run the possibilities inside his head.

Levi was supposed to come pick him up any second now.

That thought alone had spurred his legs to run, dropping the mop with a loud thump in the empty shop, and the next thing he knew, he was running past trees and other closed stores. He almost ran into people and stumbled across the sidewalk and he could see that there was panic ripping across the very few people who had stayed late on the streets. They were curious, but they weren’t reckless enough like Eren to actually go to the scene where the gunshots were closely heard. All people here were familiar with gang fights and other crazy stuff that was happening around because it was the city that never slept. Their safety wasn’t guaranteed unless they lived in a less-recluse part of the city and unfortunately, this area was one of those parts.

The brunet didn’t know what he expected when he rounded off the empty parking lot right behind the plaza but he had the sense to actually duck down the flowerbed. If he were to actually rescue someone—God forbid, it was Levi—then he’d have to be cautious. With adrenaline rushing through his veins, making him feel hot despite the autumn breeze sweeping by, he tried to peek from where his hiding spot and his eyes went wide.

There was a black Mercedes Benz with tinted windows and there were Krista and Ymir. His shorter friend was struggling against a man who was holding her arm, but it didn’t look like he was gripping too hard but it didn’t halt Ymir from trying to whack the guy upside in the head. A second guy in a black suit suddenly came out of the car and held back Ymir, who resorted to kicking but ended up touching nothing but the air. It looked like that the first man was talking to Krista, but who in their right criminal mind would talk to the victim like this instead of starting to haul them in the car?

There was something odd. Something that he was missing and he squinted, looking for any sign that he could come out with a barrage of fists to them. Levi would definitely whoop his ass once he found out that he was playing hero once again, but there was that thing again, his problem. He was loyal. He would never leave his friends alone if he saw that they were in danger and that he could help. He was afraid that he would regret something if he were to let them alone. It made him think _what if that was Armin or Mikasa? Would you be able to bear the thought that you weren’t able to help them?_ And those thoughts were what prompted him to get up and cautiously crept up the wall, letting the shadow of the roof embrace him.          

At this range, he could hear Ymir talking.

“Let her go! Bastard! She said she doesn’t wanna go with you!”

That got Eren more curious. _Does Krista know them? Why do they want to take her?_

When he saw the first man busy trying to convince Krista of something and the second man attempting to pacify the violent woman he was trying to hold up, Eren took that chance to deliver a clean kick to the second man’s back. Surprise was what he got from both of his friends but Ymir snapped out of it faster and she swung her fist to the guy holding Krista. Eren didn’t feel anything but exhilaration as he fought with his friend once more. It happened once during high school and the similarity of both incidents struck him, and he grinned. Krista was looking at them flabbergasted and Eren suddenly remembered that Levi could be panicking right now if he were to step into the shop with Eren nowhere in sight.

When the men couldn’t take it anymore and were passed out on the ground. Krista immediately went up to them and threw her arms around Ymir, tip-toeing because of their height.

“You didn’t have to do that! Why are you guys always fighting?” she said, but she looked happy to see that both of them were all right. Eren grinned at her and Ymir kissed her forehead.

“Are you guys okay?” he asked, smile was slipping off his face.

The couple nodded and he pressed on, “Why was there a gunshot?”

Ymir was the one who answered that, “Trying to scare me. Of course, that was just a dick-move and I punched him.”

“Who are these guys anyway?” Eren asked, nudging one man with his shoe.

Krista winced and Ymir looked at her worriedly before she opened her mouth, but the blonde beat her to it. “My dad has been trying to get me home.”

He raised an eyebrow. “Your dad?”

Okay, well, he certainly didn’t consider the speculation that maybe Krista Lenz was actually a princess-like character that came from a book seriously. How’d did that information get past his radar? Oh, right. He never talked about personal stuff with them before. But it looked like Ymir knew and Eren was once again reminded of his own relationship with Levi.

“Uh, I have to go!” he told them, backing up and was ready to sprint back to the bakery.

“Oh, yeah. Thank you, Eren!” Krista called out to him.

He turned around from them but his feet stopped working at Ymir’s words.

“Rod Reiss is too persistent for his good. Why don’t you just march up to him, kick him in the balls, and just say that you’ll do whatever you want to do.”

His green eyes widened. His mouth dropped in shock. His fingers trembled on his sides before he curled them into tight fists. He turned back to the two women with a new resolve in his mind.

“Did you just say… Rod Reiss?” he asked them slowly.

Krista hesitantly nodded and Ymir gave him a suspicious look. The latter said, “Why? Do you have some grudge against him? Do you want to join me and let’s kick his ass, yeah?”

Grudge didn’t really cover it. _He’s the one who killed my parents_. But it wasn’t like he would be able to tell them that. He wasn’t even sure what do these two know and he had to be cautious. His time was ticking and he was sure that Levi was just one second away from calling the cops and the whole special operation squad.

“Eren?” Krista called out and she looked like she was ready to ask him questions but everything went black.

And something in the air that he inhaled inside was terribly odd.

“EREN! LET HIM GO!”

He struggled against the person who was holding him up and he started to choke on the garter around his neck. The sack that was put over his head made it very difficult to breathe and he suddenly felt his consciousness slipping away from his grasp.

_No, not yet._

_Don’t let it end here._

_You have to FIGHT._

He fought. He tried to claw the eyes of the person who was gripping his wrists and tried to kick his shins or whatever else he could manage to fracture and deter the person from his objective. But nothing worked. The person was like a large mass of steel boulder and his eyes could no longer see the gaps in between the seams of the fabric sack.

“BASTARD! FUCKING LET GO OF HIM!” He heard Ymir bellow.

He could’ve sworn that Krista was already crying and shrieking.

“NOOOO! LET GO OF HIM! EREN!”

This guy couldn’t possibly hold off his two other friends and just before he lost everything—believed that at that moment, he did—he realized that he would forever regret leaving his friends to these guys.

It was an ambush.

And Eren was almost certain of it.

Then the darkness claimed him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uh please don't kill me. LOL I gave you that last chapter and now this...I know XD And guys, omg. The end is like approaching and this story has approximately six chapters left. And I'm graduating from high school soon.... OHGOSH.


	25. A Gear and A Plan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He will save him no matter what, even if it costs him his life - even if his family is behind that gun.

**I don’t own SnK or any songs mentioned here**

* * *

 

_“I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they're right, you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together.”_

_― Marilyn Monroe_

* * *

   

**~Chapter Twenty-Five: A Gear and A Plan~**

 

Step, step, turn. Step, step, turn.

Out of all things that he could and wanted to do, pacing wasn’t one of them.

Levi’s patience was thinning and his eyes swept around the room as he repeated the process of walking up and down the floors of the stupid FBI station.

He really shouldn’t be here. He should be going after Eren, that trouble-magnet brat who somehow got whisked away by their enemies when Levi was only a damn couple of minutes away from the shop.

“Can you do something about _him_?” He heard that irritating voice ask away his question and if Levi weren’t so distracted, he would have pummel the horseface’s ass to tomorrow.

He searched the entire bakery when he got there, even going far to looking at the fucking garbage cans, but there was no Eren in sight. He couldn’t help but curse himself for ever trusting his decisions when it came to Eren. He shouldn’t have let him do whatever he wanted— _so fucking reckless_ —but he knew that it was inevitable. No matter how much he tried to persuade him, Eren was his own person and cutting off that little freedom he had these days was something Levi couldn’t just do. It would’ve happened, eventually, but it didn’t make it less painful.

Just when he thought he had Eren within his grasp, he’d lost him again.

“Can we all calm down and think rationally?” Mike boomed, probably exhausted and on the edge just like the rest of them. Levi noted that he wasn’t the only one restless; Mikasa was on the couch, looking murderous and was gripping something in her hand— _is that a fucking shinai?_ At least, Levi wasn’t the only one who was thinking of handling some weapons right now, ready to attack the first enemy in sight. Armin was tinkling with his laptop and then he watched as the blonde occupied the computer chair and went on the multiple screens right in the corner of the room where all the tech stuff was situated. Jean looked constipated, constantly glancing at Mikasa, probably making sure that he wouldn’t be the unlucky one to taste her wrath. Erwin was phoning someone and Hanji was looking at her own laptop, right next to where Armin was.

It was silently chaotic; there were no words to describe their state right now. And Levi was supposed to be a lawyer and doing— _I don’t know, lawyer stuff?_ He was frustrated. He could work well with police and devising plans and all that, but his brain hadn’t been working properly ever since he threatened to gun Mike in his hysteric phone-call after he’d heard that some civilians around the bakery had heard gunshots minutes before Levi got there.

“If Historia Reiss is Eren’s friend, then she might have known who he is. What do you guys think?” the agent was asking the three college students in the room since they were the most helpful in this. Levi had stopped his pacing and he glared at the picture right in front of him. Someone better talk now or he’d snap.

“Kris—Historia isn’t like that. I’m ninety-nine point nine percent sure that she’s not involved,” Armin answered for them and the other two nodded in confirmation.

Levi couldn’t control the anger bubbling in his gut though and he almost growled, “What about the point one percent, Arlert?”

Those blue eyes didn’t seem fazed by his outburst but he shifted uncomfortably in his seat and he could see in the corner of his eye that Hanji was shaking her head in disapproval. “She might have found out the last minute and has somehow gotten involved with it. But she’ll never sell Eren out.”

“There are no witnesses?” Jean asked, looking at all of them.

“No. But they said that someone saw a couple of girls at the parking lot behind the plaza,” Erwin said, putting away his phone in his pocket and staring at them impassively.

“Does anyone know how to contact Historia?” Mike asked expectantly. There should be something to get around with this.

“Yeah, I do,” Mikasa said, pocketing her phone from her yoga pants. Levi really didn’t have the patience to wait here, but he needed to tone it down because he knew that Eren’s childhood friends were trying to do their utmost effort here.

“Tell me what to do, Erwin,” he silently said as his friend stood next to him. He didn’t seem surprised at that rare plea from Levi but he did raise his goddamned thick eyebrows. After all this, Levi would definitely shave those eyebrows one way or the other. Unless he started talking now, which would be really helpful.

“Nothing. But be ready when the operation starts. It’s obviously going to commence sooner than we’d like to since they put on their first move.”

Yeah, he almost forgot about that. He wasn’t the only person who wanted to barge into the hotel right now, where Rod Reiss would most likely be. There were people, officials like Mike and Erwin, who had been trying to solve a case that was supposed to be buried five years ago. However, they all knew that nothing could possibly bury a lie. Everything would come out eventually.

He couldn’t help but worry. It was natural to worry about the person who was the most important one in his life right now. He had lost his parents, pushed everyone away and had been lucky enough for the few friends that remained by his side. He didn’t want Eren, the person who had taught him many wonderful things, to be gone from his life. He thought he had lost him before, but now Levi knew what it was like to be teetering between life and death as he thought of Eren being forever gone. He wouldn’t be able to take it. He hadn’t lost anyone in many years and he’d like to keep it that way.

Levi would save him, and he would prove to him that he was no pushover and that he was strong enough to protect him.

“Okay,” he said with a new resolve.

 

* * *

           

It wasn’t long before they gained some successful results.

Historia Reiss didn’t answer her phone and Levi had to remind them that they had probably taken her as well when they kidnapped Eren. He couldn’t come up with a plausible reason—the girl was hiding behind a false name and the only cause for that would be that she was trying to hide from her own family, from her father’s fame. Armin came up with the theory that maybe Eren was trying to save Krista—Levi clicked his tongue at that, _he would_ —and somehow the guys spotted him and took that chance to take him.

“What are you suggesting we do?” Mikasa asked, eyes were glinting with determination and Levi could now see how much she and Eren looked alike. He remembered the brunet saying how precious Mikasa and her family was to him because they took him in and raised him as a son after his mom died. He couldn’t help but feel grateful for their existence—Eren wouldn’t be who he was now if it wasn’t for them.

“We can’t really take action because that might put Eren in danger. We need solid information—a witness or someone who could work with us,” Mike explained to them.

Levi tried to calm down. If there was only someone who could—

 _Love Me Like You Do_ suddenly tore the silence bearing down on their shoulders and if Levi was a lesser man, he would’ve had jumped out of his skin. Armin and Jean did. Levi couldn’t fathom why would the two-toned-haired guy get startled when it was _his_ phone that was ringing.

“Uh…” Jean looked around first and Levi was afraid that the kid would become cross-eyed—he couldn’t believe that he was the other person he competed against for Eren’s heart, the guy was just absolutely terrible at handling his composure. “I’ll get this call…” No one said anything but they watched like hawks ready to snatch their prey from the sea (it looked like Jean was the sea in this situation and the phone was the prey) and one could tell how tense the young man was as he got his phone from the top of a pile of papers he was working on.

“Do you think we can get a witness?” Armin silently asked Mikasa and Levi heard it because he was standing within an earshot.

“I hope so, Armin. I hope so,” she replied with that distant look in her eyes as she almost unconsciously hid her mouth with the red scarf around her neck. Levi felt like it wasn’t something that he was supposed to know, but he knew the story of that red scarf.

“Err…” Jean began to mumble as he scrambled out of the desk. He stalked to Mike and the blonde agent looked at him as the young man started waving with his hands.

“Words, horseface. Words,” Levi couldn’t help but remind him. He shifted closer to where the conversation was taking place and he sensed the best friends stand from the couch.

Jean finally removed the phone away from his ear and started speaking fast. “Ymir! Ymir! She’s on the phone! She’s with Krista right now!”

Mikasa and Armin lunged like they were going to rip away the device off Jean and Levi wasn’t any different; it looked like he was about to go on a massacre streak though. Finally, Mike and Erwin both presented their empty palms in front of the distressed student and Jean looked alternatively between the two intimidating men. He believed that Levi heard someone spewing curses and saying something along the lines of “You better hurry up, jackass, or I’ll save Eren myself!”

Levi couldn’t even have the heart to feel a little jealousy stirring his insides because it was Jean who Eren’s friends had turned into. Well, it wasn’t like they would be able to contact him through his phone when they barely knew him. He was just extremely glad that there was a way to save his Eren now. He hoped so.

It was Erwin who gave up the privilege of getting to talk to the witness and Mike took over, gently yet firmly grabbing the phone from Jean’s sweating hands. Levi was glad that he saved himself from the experience of touching him.

“Hello, Ymir? This is Mike,” the agent calmly told the impatient woman on the phone.

Levi didn’t hear the side of what Ymir was saying and Mike was merely nodding and deeply humming under his voice. The atmosphere around them grew thick as the phone conversation went on; no one was willing to offer up suggestions, afraid that they would miss anything even though they could only see and hear one side’s responses. Eren’s friends were on the edge, like they were ready to bolt out of the door if they were ordered to, and Levi stood on his ground, prepared to enter the criminal world once again. He saw how cruel human beings were and discovered of what they were capable of doing through his interactions with the convicted, the guilty, and the victims. He thought that it was pretty horrifying; he just hadn’t yet realized how frightening it really was to see someone he loved go through the same experience.

He knew who Rod Reiss was. There was a case from months ago, something that he mentioned to Erwin during his stay in the hospital, and Levi was in charge of bringing the attention of the higher-ups to the said case. Nobody wanted to touch it—they feared retribution and Levi wanted to laugh because he had already conjured what type of a man Rod Reiss was.

And he was right. But this time, he wasn’t going to drop the case halfway through even if the Heavens themselves were to command him to. He would see to it that Reiss would go to jail and pay for his wrongdoings.

Mike clicked the phone shut, eyes were suddenly blazing with something—Levi recognized anticipation and apprehension, which something that made his stomach drop. But the words that he’d given them the next second were able to get his heart on track.

“It’s time to collect the evidence we need. Our team will save Eren.”

 

* * *

 

Levi had gone to numerous situations where his life was potentially in danger. There was that barista who almost killed him as he ambushed Levi in front of the firm with a kitchen knife, but the raven wasn’t as weak as his short stature told people. He studied taekwondo and could defend himself well—he’d known that he was bound to get into these kinds of troubles when he entered the law field. He had his trusted friend, Erwin, who could guide him through the criminal maze and teach him a few tricks that he could use in his work. These people who had tried to get back at him were mostly amateurs—driven with fear, anger, and fatigue—and they barely grazed Levi. But that didn’t mean that it didn’t affect the lawyer.

He defended cases, shut down others, but he’d never done anything without a reason. People called him heartless—cold and unapproachable—but there were also few people who saw what he was capable of, like his Special Operation Squad. Levi didn’t fall short of the law’s expectation, but his moralities were tested but he accepted the challenge. He inserted his own views after taking in others’ opinions to account.

But Levi knew that he’d never speak to Rod Reiss. A vile human like him didn’t deserve any second chances, he thought. He’d encountered politicians and other businessmen and Levi left cases to Erwin to investigate when he knew that he wouldn’t be able to do anything because these figures were protected—protected by the law, some attorneys and policemen themselves, as much as Levi hated to admit. It wasn’t fair. And he knew that the only reason that Rod Reiss hadn’t been successfully inspected and arrested yet was because he was being protected.

And Levi wanted concrete evidence no matter what happened.

The bright side to this was that there was another lawyer who was too enthusiastic to be the “shield of the truth” (as Eren quoted it the day he told Levi everything) and the highest-placed FBI team in the city was ready to operate a secret plan to catch Rod Reiss.

And save Eren.

But Levi couldn’t help but twitch as he remembered his role—a room attendant.

Despite his complaints, he couldn’t help but feel nervous and worried about their setup. Erwin was cunning enough to sneak Armin up to the rooftop of the hotel and the blonde mushroom had organized his own device of tinkling and manipulating the video surveillance equipment on the top floor, where their target was currently staying. Thanks to Ymir, they knew which floor to specifically go to, and the information that Mike had gathered the past week was sufficient enough to know who to bribe to in the security group of the hotel. It was hard work, and it was only starting.

Levi had dressed himself up as the room service boy (he hated the title so much but his blood was curling and uncurling at the thought of what was happening to Eren at the very moment). They waited until it was late at night, past midnight, to get everything ready. Mike had actually kept from them that he had a solid plan but what he didn’t expect was for Eren to be the catalyst of this operation.

He watched from the corner of the lobby as Mikasa, dressed in deep red wine skirt and pearly white blouse, walked up to the reception desk with her arm hooked with Jean who was surprisingly composed for once. If this wasn’t so important, he was sure that the horseface would be shitting in his pants right now—not because the situation required to put his life on the line but because of the ball of monstrous anger close to him right now. He was wearing a suit and actually looked older with that stupid hair gelled back, and Mikasa looked mature, too, with her makeup. Their IDs were printed with different names, and Levi had to wonder if the agent that they were putting their trust into actually had a hobby of giving out false information to others.

Levi then got ready. They knew which floor to go to, and he wondered who the hell would build a goddamn eighty-story hotel. Of course, the fucking Rod Reiss would. He went to the elevators and got into the first one that opened, which was half-empty. When the doors closed, he literally could see on the mirrors how short he was compared to everyone else, but more than that, he hated his get-up. He never liked cosplaying, unless if there were _other_ purposes that he really shouldn’t think about right now, which was why he could only tap his shoe in impatience as the box went up to its passengers’ desired destinations.

Then, finally, floor seventy-five. It was the highest they could reach because the other five floors were off-limits, according to their source of information. They wouldn’t push their luck, but that would mean that Levi would have to practice something that he hadn’t done in awhile.

Mountain climbing. Or in this case, skyscraper-climbing.

He didn’t know which one was worse but he could feel in his bones that the darkness of the night and the height of the fucking building would definitely contribute to the reasons of why he never pursued the option of being a ninja. But he would never give up.

_This is for Eren._

Mike was nowhere to be seen but he was with the rest of his squad, searching for the secret passage to the underground market that Eren’s dad had mentioned in his video. It should be heavily secured, which was why going in fewer numbers would result in a greater chance of successfully infiltrating the said place. Mike hadn’t said anything to them about what their plan was, but he told them that Armin would be watching all of them (Levi had a camera and microphone installed in his velvet vest) and he would be the one to press the alarm and signal them to move out if things went wiry. Levi thought they had less than fifty chance of surviving this alive, but he would take it. It was better than pacing in the goddamned room for hours.

He saw another room-boy pushing a cart of toiletries and whatever bottles of stuff were in there. His gray eyes drifted to the nearby door, which he knew was the supply closet, he really hoped it was that. Levi then sauntered to the man who was humming low with his voice before his hand shot up and grabbed his shoulder.

“Floor seventy is empty. They need some assistance and they assigned me here,” he told him.

It might have looked suspicious but the man kept humming and left the cart to Levi. “’Kay. Be good, newbie.” His heart almost stopped when he heard that but he merely smiled in discomfort, he hoped that the worker room-boy hadn’t seen that. He probably did something out of their protocol or something for the guy to call him a ‘newbie,’ Levi wouldn’t know, but the man was laidback and he was glad for that.

He walked slowly in the hallway, which was pretty large compared to hotels he’d been to during his world trips. He waited for the _ding_ of the elevator after he went one full circle of floor seventy-five. It would be the best plan to know where to run when the situation would need him to.

When he heard the sound that he was waiting for, he followed the couple in disguise but maintained a good distance so that it wouldn’t look suspicious in the cameras installed in the hallways. He knew that Armin would do something about it and Hanji might be somewhere inside the main system. She wasn’t tech savvy but Levi knew that she was extremely smart for her own good.

Mikasa and Jean went inside the room that they were supposed to go. Levi followed them a couple of minutes after he pretended to be trying to get something from the cleaning closet. When he was inside, he immediately jogged to where the windows were. They got it ready sometime ago and when he felt the smoothness of the glass, a part that was hidden in the shadows of the heavy curtains, they all heard a small click and Levi knew that he got it.

Erwin was definitely good at what he did.

“You have the equipment?” he asked them, and Jean hurried to unzipped the luggage that they had. Mikasa handed one material out of the contents and Levi gingerly took it. Something in the device that he was gonna use was making his head hurt, but he didn’t really wanna think about it anymore.

He buckled up. Levi put the brown leather around his waist, covering the arse part of his black slacks, and then he attached everything else—the leather straps that went around his back with a small shell connecting every strap encircling his body, his shoulders, his thighs, and in the front like suspenders. There was a box and Levi had to wonder why they looked empty, like something thin or maybe blade-like objects were supposed to be in it (it reminded him of the kitchen knives block), but the box was the operating mechanism. It had gas, which Mike had explained very briefly that it was its fuel, the one that would make Levi fly. The blonde sounded so sure that Levi was going to be able to make it work, even though he had no idea _what the hell_ he was doing—he was merely riding on his rush. There were handgrips and Mike hadn’t elaborated on what was making it function but they were Levi’s control of the steel wire that would shoot out of the operating box. And not to mention, there would be grappling hooks.

Levi mused about it; _this equipment doesn’t seem to be something that normal cops would use._

And there was that fact that it was strangely comfortable around him.

It looked like that he was somewhat thinking too deeply about an inanimate device because he got almost startled when Mikasa spoke.

“They trust Ymir right now because of Krista, so you have to make sure that you’ll be able to reach her when you reach their floor.”

“Krista will most likely create a diversion for us. She might not know what the hell is her father doing out here—what he’s _really_ doing—but she knows what they did to Eren and she’s playing along,” Jean added with all seriousness in his voice. Levi was almost convinced that the kid would make a good lawyer.

“Who’s on our side over there?” he asked them, pushing out the replaced piece of the window glass aside and wow, _fucking Erwin thought this so well_ because he was sure that he was the only one who would be able to fit due to his lithe figure. He got ready and he suddenly realized that _the hooks better be goddamned dull or coated with jelly or whatever fuck is there_ because damaging the windows would just simply telling them _SURPRISE! We’re here to infiltrate your goddamned company! So better watch out!_

“One is Ian Dietrich. You would know him immediately,” Mikasa told him.

A detailed sketch of the guy would have been great but then again, he was the one impatient enough to do this. He’d rather wing everything—and hope that he would live to see Eren once again.

He swiftly and gracefully slid down the glass after the steel wires were blasted out and the hooks got attached on the railing of the rooftop. They picked the room for a certain reason, because the above floors would be safe for Levi as he went along with climbing to the top floor. It was no easy task, the wind was making his teeth chatter and he was still in his stupid vest but there was nothing he could do about it. He endured it. Endured the fear that he would fall to his death, his bones might be crushed halfway through the ride down the fucking eighty-story building. Endured the fear that Eren could be being harmed right now—God forbid he was being tortured or worse, not breathing anymore…

He stopped those thoughts all at once and focused on his task at hand. One hook after another, and he was relieved that it didn’t malfunction under his control. His legs were kinda shaky as he climbed on but he struggled against it, planting one foot on the glass after another, becoming steadier as he went on. True to Mikasa’s word, someone was waiting for him when he reached his destination. He didn’t expect them until he saw a hand practically hauling him out of the dark night. He had been afraid that someone would see him on the way up so his fright had spiked the minute he realized that there was a person touching him. He didn’t panic because no one else in their right mind would grab him like that if they hadn’t been waiting for him.

It might be Ian, but he wasn’t certain and he didn’t really care. His adrenaline was coursing through his blood like superhuman sweets that was giving him this bounce on the balls of his feet.

He needed to see Eren. Right. Now.

“Oi, Shortie!” Ymir called out, half-yelling and half-whispering as she approached him. He tugged off his gear and Ian went to work of organizing it back. Their ally seemed to know more stuff than Levi had given him credit for.

“Where’s Eren?” was his first question to her.

She did not look calm at all. Her hair wasn’t in ponytail and her eyes looked wild as if she’d been running around in circles for hours. He briefly noted that Historia wasn’t with her—and he remembered that it was that blonde he’d seen with Ymir in more than one occasion.

“He’s in Rod’s study room. They locked him up in there and Krista went to talk to her dad,” Ymir explained to him and she was trying to calm down but Levi knew that it wasn’t working. He realized that both of them were in a similar situation—they had to save the one that they loved. And they had to go soon.

“I’m assuming that all’s left to do is break down the damn door?” he said as he started briskly walking and the dark-skinned woman got the hint and began leading him the way. They were guards and Ymir, who was the one that the security was familiar with, went ahead and distracted them as Levi snuck into one pillar to the next hallway. She followed him afterwards and he prayed to Gods that Mikasa was actually keeping her promise of staying put inside the hotel room because he didn’t think that he would be able to successfully save all of them.

There was doubt in his heart but it was clouded with pain. He wanted to know if Eren was still safe at this second. He wanted to know if his heart was still beating.

“There’s the study room,” Ymir pointed out to the double mahogany doors, standing perfectly tall and strong. There were only two guards; men in black suits and Levi could almost grimace at how cliché everything was (it fucking looked like he was in an action movie or something, but his intent was real). He needed to save Eren now.

_“SHUT UP! Krista, get behind me!”_

They both heard that voice, loud, clear and familiar. It almost made Levi jump to the big guys in front of the door. Ymir looked like she was also one step away from doing something stupid that would ruin their whole plan, but they couldn’t afford that. Levi really appreciated the fact that Ymir was actually clever enough to manage the others from getting her phone (though, how, was something that Levi didn’t need an answer to). She’d heard from them what their plan was, and she and Ian had been companions-in-secret the whole time they were caged in this place.

“I’ll distract them,” she offered out of the blue.

Levi sharply looked at her and glared. He knew the dangers and letting someone shoulder the consequences would make Levi regret something. “No, I’ll do that—”

“No,” she cut him off, quickly giving him a glance before focusing on the other hallway, to the right of the study room. “I’ll give you a diversion. I seriously fucking hope that we gave the others enough time to do their parts. I’ll be the one to send the red flare to Armin; I’ll tell those guys about the intruders.”

There was only silence. Levi thought about it. This was their only plan; if he were to suddenly show up in front of them then they would probably gun him at point blank. If Ymir could successfully avert their attention somewhere else, then Levi could only hope that he had enough time to free Eren and Historia from that room. He calculated the estimated time in his head—if he were lucky enough, he could have roughly five minutes at max before everything goes _ka-boom_. He didn’t doubt that Rod Reiss had some lines of professional killers and traitor cops in this building, and they would be there on time once they realized what was truly happening.

“Go.”

And Ymir went scrambling to find Ian, he hoped. She still had to be protected by someone, no matter how strong she was.

Levi began cracking his knuckles. It had been a while since he got serious.

And serious it was he gave the two guards in front of the door. But they didn’t go down without a sound; he flinched at their cries as he fractured their bones. He didn’t go for the kill but rather for their point of unconsciousness but that had been proven to be difficult.

He didn’t have a choice but to kick the doors open.

His eyes immediately found those Caribbean ones, widened in full shock.

Levi realized that he’d never been happy to see his Eren surprised to see him. He finally saw him. He was finally within reach. He could finally hold him. He could finally kiss him.

He was finally there. Just a couple of feet away from his outstretched arm.

A gunshot rang in the air that made his head snap to the source of the sound.

And his lips parted in shock, mirroring Eren’s reaction to his grand appearance.

Because now, his uncle, Kenny Ackerman, was the one who was standing a couple of feet away from him. Holding a gun pointed at Levi.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OMG It's like official. There's like 5 more chapters of this story then ...The End. I'm gonna be sad!!! TvT I feel like everything is gonna end soon and i'm still waiting for all the episodes of Kuroko no Basket to come out LOL But no worries! Even if i'm about to go to college soon, I'll try to accomplish this: finish the other story that I'm about to upload in the future~ More details will be given out at the end of this :D


	26. Family

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Families are important. Which is why is hurts to see them standing across from you, not by your side.

**I don’t own SnK or their characters**

* * *

_“When everything goes to hell, the people who stand by you without flinching -- they are your family. ”_

_― Jim Butcher_

* * *

 

**~Chapter Twenty-Six: Family~**

Levi hadn’t been the greatest teenager—he’d mugged people near the pier, had stolen fruits and other insignificant items from the open market in Lyon and was even held back by one year in high school. He was not the greatest nephew either. But he hoped that he was at least a decent son to his parents before they decided that his present for Christmas was more important than going home safely.

Yeah, he was definitely not the greatest nephew if his uncle was pointing a gun to him right now.

If he could only control his emotions, he would’ve done that right now. He felt shocked to see Kenny Ackerman standing next to Rod Reiss, the man who had murdered Eren’s parents and caged many people under the black market that he was running. However, there was that twinge of pain sent to his heart as he met his uncle’s gray eyes, and he couldn’t manipulate his own feelings from going on an overdrive. His eyes widened, his mouth parted, and his chest heaved up and down as his body started trembling.

_Why?_

“Levi…”

He couldn’t even hear Eren properly right now, but that faint voice was enough for him to snap out of his trance. He couldn’t afford to be paralyzed by his own fear—yes, fear. He feared his uncle because if his presence was there right now, then what else hadn’t Levi known this entire time about Kenny? But he really feared for himself and for Kenny; the man behind that gun was his family. And Levi would do anything for Eren.

“Kenny. What does this mean?” he asked, surprising himself at how steady his voice came out even though he was almost visibly shaking. He couldn’t even say ‘Uncle’ without him feeling like his throat had been squeezed hard enough for his windpipe to be crushed.

_Why?_

“Levi.” It was not even an answer. He just called him.

_That old man._

He remembered Kenny being there when his parents passed away in the hospital. His shoulders were slumped forward as he waited for the doctors to say something for him, but no one dared to come close to him. He could figure why; there was that hollow inside his chest that was threatening to swallow his entire being with that force of darkness—a hole produced by pain, grief, and guilt. Why was he at the hospital in the first place? Oh. His phone at home had rung when he was almost about to sleep and it felt like the news that were delivered to him weren’t for him at all.

No, it couldn’t be.

And when he ended up alone, sitting in the hallway like a massive shadow curled into a ball, there was only one person who had approached him. A man who looked like he could pass as someone who would gun anyone potentially dangerous to his physical and/or mental being. He immediately intrigued Levi. He introduced himself as his uncle, an Ackerman, and he took Levi into his care but they would live in that house—that house where his parents used to live.

The ivory house was their treasure, and Levi had heard their story a million times already. His dad was doing some business in Japan and had stayed in a hotel, where a room attendant named Amelia had captured his interest. And thus, they fell in love and got married. They put all their dreams into building a house where a family of five could fit—they weren’t set about how many children they wanted but they were happy as long they were together. And Levi was born. The spoiling became a little too long and his parents decided that an only child would also be precious, even if they regretted that he wouldn’t have anyone to play with. He suspected that there was something more into that story but Levi didn’t pry—he’d learned this over the years when he realized that he had more capacity and faster rate of understanding than the other kids.

But no matter how many times he thought about it, he could only come out with the answer that it was _his fault that they died._

The house didn’t feel empty when Kenny was there; he ate breakfast on certain mornings, even bathed for an hour in the bathtub and Levi had to knock and ask if he hadn’t drowned yet. He would reply, _“Not yet, kid. Not yet.”_ Levi thought that he was really a strange adult back then. His absence was never felt until he stopped coming home completely. Levi thought, _“Maybe I’m just that hard to be around.”_ It wasn’t like he blamed Kenny or something; Levi was just looking for a companion to fill up the empty space. He tried to remember when was the last time Kenny had ate because the cereal that he bought for himself had expired last year. He watched TV but the echo of silence was too much he thought his ears would bleed and he would go insane.

So Levi looked for the noise. He looked for _something_.

He didn’t think that he would find it in an accidental meeting with his two friends back in elementary school.

He didn’t think he would find Isabel Magnolia and Farlan Church.

“Levi. Please…” Eren started to plead and Levi turned his eyes towards him. Those bright ocean eyes were watering and Levi’s heart clenched at the thought of his bright-eyed lover asking for his help. But it didn’t seem like Eren was asking for that.

It seemed like Eren was afraid of something else. Levi just didn’t know if he was ready to find out what it was.

“Levi, leave,” Kenny’s voice suddenly boomed, breaking the stillness that was stretching over them. The tension in the air was so thick that Levi had to think if they were still breathing or they were just simply drowning in this wretched feeling. He didn’t really want to continue that thought, and he composed his face in order to avoid the people across from him in figuring him out. He was sure that his uncle could see the underlying hatred, confusion, and disappointment in his own silver eyes but he couldn’t deny that he’d actually wanted that.

He wanted him to see how much betrayed and lost he was feeling right now.

“You don’t get to tell me what to do, you bastard!” He bit back, standing in front of Eren who was kneeling on the red carpeted ground, guarding Historia behind his back like what Levi was doing for him. The blonde seemed like she was a fragile little thing but the way she was trying to push Eren back, as if to say that she was refusing his protection, Levi could tell that she was determined as all of them were. Ymir, the one that Historia cared about, was probably alerting all of the guards right now and Levi still thought that the plan was utterly outrageous, but he knew that the rest of the team would pull through. Otherwise, Armin would be blasting their eardrums, barking orders to get the hell out. So far, there was not a single noise from the blonde mushroom. Levi could only hope that that was a good sign. Armin could be busy trying to get everyone out of the other side of this plan, which was mainly Mike and his associates.

“Historia, come here, dear,” Rod Reiss suddenly spoke, startling everyone in the room. He stepped forward, despite the gun that Kenny was holding next to him, and Levi heard the gentleness from the father but he knew better—Reiss wasn’t the man Historia thought he was.

The girl suddenly stood up, a fierce expression plastered on her face, and Levi could almost say “not bad” because this girl was just as strong as he thought she was. By her poise, the way her clenched fists were resting on her sides with control, and how her eyes seemed to glint brightly with courage and determination, Levi knew that the girl was neither weak nor a pushover. _She’s a fighter._ He mused at how Eren seemed to attract the best of friends one could have; it made him appreciate that Hanji and Erwin were there for them, too.

“Dad, is it true?” Historia asked calmly, and Levi saw Eren restrain himself from shielding his friend away from their enemies’ sight. _Enemies, right. They’re our enemies._ He’s _my enemy, too._

Rod Reiss feigned to be hurt, face was contorting in pain and head was shaking as if he couldn’t believe that Historia was accusing him of an unthinkable thing. The situation reminded him of what happened couple of days back.

_“This is my fight. Please, step back.”_

“I don’t know what are you talking about, my daughter. Just come here to my side, Historia,” her father cooed. He then lifted his hand—Levi was alert and was aware that he didn’t have any weapons but his fists and legs would do—and outstretched his arm to his child’s direction. The raven could see that Eren was twitching to get in between them but the young man seemed to be in more control of his emotions; he could still remember Eren being a hotheaded fool but _he changed._ And he could see that it was for the better.

Historia put intensity on her gaze towards her father and yelled out, “Is it true that you were the one who killed Eren’s parents?!”

Rod Reiss smiled, like there was something funny about what his daughter had just said. Levi’s blood was curling at the thought that the bastard might be playing games with them—a sick game that he wanted Eren nothing to do with. But it was too late. To begin with it was actually Eren who was at the center of all these things and Levi had just started to understand his situation, but then again, he was the one who eagerly volunteered to directly save Eren from this hellhole.

Rod was still had an amused expression on his damn face and Levi was hyperaware that his sweat was rolling on his back now. The goddamned vest wasn’t doing him any good. Because the attention was switched to the father-and-daughter, Levi had almost forgotten his initial shock after tumbling forward in the room. He had almost forgotten that Kenny was guarding Rod.

“It’s not me. It’s not true, my child,” Rod answered with that creep-ass smile and Levi wanted to punch him in the face. He wished that he could rush to that murderer right now for lying to his daughter’s face. He wished that Kenny was not there with a gun in his hand, because he wasn’t sure anymore if Kenny was willing to pull the trigger even if he was his nephew, his only family.

“Please, don’t lie to me, Dad. Just tell me,” Historia sounded like she was almost begging and Rod didn’t seem to be affected by it. It was like he was…certain of the things that came out from his mouth, and it made Levi almost wavered of what he believed was true.

“I’m not lying,” Rod said.

 _Strange._ Levi noted that Eren seemed to be much more quiet now; he heard the brunet screaming earlier, full of emotionally fueled vigor and the conviction to protect the people he cared about. But he wasn’t saying anything. _Is he enduring it? Is he just waiting for his chance until the bastard finally shuts up? Is he going to prove him wrong now? Is he going to expose his lies with Historia here?_ He could only think of these questions in his head because he knew that time was the answer. Eren would definitely make a move when it was the right time for him to bring down his number one opponent.

But there was a line between his forehead, and Levi knew that Eren was frightened.

Was there something that he was missing?

He could only stand there and listen as the exchange between Rod and Historia took place. His eyes were still trained to see if Kenny would make a move to any of them. He wasn’t stupid; he knew that his uncle was on Rod’s side, judging by how the nose of the gun was pointing at their direction—to his nephew’s direction.

“But…” Historia faltered, as if she was torn between believing his father and disregarding the utter sincerity of his answer. Levi knew that she was struggling with her resolve right now, because he knew how much it sucked to have your family be your enemy. He was also wishing that his uncle wasn’t there on the other side as much as she did.

“ _I_ was the one who did it.”

He knew that voice—that familiar voice that had asked him if he would like to stay with him. They ended up staying in that house. Yes, that house where Levi and Kenny had spent their small amount of time together as a family. He wasn’t very good at it, heck, he really sucked at being Levi’s legal guardian. But he was happy. Levi was glad that he wasn’t actually alone—without his parents, without anyone he could lean into. He knew that somewhere outside of that ivory house, there was his father’s brother who gave him some attention as Levi grew up.

But that same voice was saying that he killed the parents of the man that Levi loved.

His blood ran cold as his eyes went unfocused for one trembling moment. He didn’t hear the gasp that Historia emitted near him, but he was awfully aware of that heated gaze—worried and scared for his sake—bearing on his back.

Eren had known all along.

This was the reason why Eren hadn’t told him everything.

_Just how much pain did this brat have gone through?_

His silver eyes searched for any hesitation, regret or pain on Kenny’s face. But there was only indifference, like he didn’t care if everyone knew—if Levi knew—that he killed people. That he murdered the parents of Eren Jaeger.

“What…did you just say?” Levi’s voice cracked but he couldn’t grasp all of his thoughts together. His mind was reeling and he was afraid that he would collapse right there. He couldn’t bring himself to look at Eren’s face. He was the constant reminder to Eren of who killed his parents—his Dad who had sacrificed everything to make things right again and his Mom who had only been caught in the situation because she wanted to protect her loved ones. How could Levi find the ability to look at those green eyes that might have only been seeing the eyes of his parents’ murderer?

“I was the one who killed Grisha and Carla,” Kenny confirmed without a moment of reluctance. Levi didn’t want to hear it—those words were like knives piercing his lungs, making him let out shaking breaths. But his uncle continued but this time, his eyes were on Eren’s, “The day Grisha went to retrieve evidence from the lab, I took him out. Lit the entire place on fire until the night was blazing bright. Then, we searched for your mother and I let her die. I let her bleed to death and—”

“SHUT UP! SHUT THE FUCK UP!”

Out of all people who could have snapped, it was Levi who did. He couldn’t believe that his body was wracked with convulsion and that his eyes were moist. He didn’t want to hear it, he didn’t want those silver-blue eyes to snap to his direction again but they did. He heard the truth—the harsh truth that ended what he had believed in this entire time.

“WHY DID YOU DO IT?!”

“Levi…” Eren’s voice seemed far away but it kept him on his ground. Levi controlled his breathing and threw a pointed glare at his uncle, heated with hatred.

“Because he was trying to protect _you_ ,” Rod Reiss said as if he was saying _silly, silly boy_. Levi’s heart stopped and he heard Eren suck in his breath.

“…What?”

“Rod…” Kenny’s tone was of a warning and Levi shifted his eyes on the pudgy, villainous man.

“What do you mean?”

“Simple, _boy_ —”

“Rod! You _shut the fuck up_ or—” Kenny threatened but he was cut off, as if the man wasn’t the least bit afraid that the taller man could point the nuzzle of the gun to his head instead.

“—Kenny Ackerman joined my company as a payment of his debt and in exchange of keeping you safe,” Rod finished with a dark glint in his eye.

This time Kenny didn’t hesitate to drill his weapon on the man’s temple. Historia screamed but she restrained herself from going forward—despite of what she had heard, Rod was still her father and Levi could still think of the same with Kenny, he was still his uncle. Eren moved and Levi had almost forgotten how fast and strong the young man was, maybe much better than him, before he put his friend behind his back again.

“Krista, please, don’t move,” he pleaded and the girl didn’t fight him.

“I was the one who ordered him to do it. The Jaegers turned out to be…an inconvenience. I just gave Kenny his options, to protect his only nephew or to kill the people he barely knew.”

Levi couldn’t feel his feet. Everything was tumbling down. He realized that he barely knew anything—he was a lawyer, a friend, and a lover and yet, he didn’t know anything. How could all this be happening when his eyes were opened the entire time? Or were they really closed all this time and he just didn’t bother to see what was really in front of him? Yeah, he was definitely not a good nephew. How could Fate be so cruel that she decided that it was goddamned okay to interlace his life with Eren’s this way? This was just fucking messed up. How come all these people had protected him all along and he didn’t even know it? How couldn’t he just protect them instead? Was he really this weak?

 It wasn’t after a warm hand had found its way to Levi’s, lacing their fingers together and bonding them as one that Levi then realized.

Eren was strong because his loved ones were right next to him. He believed that he could protect them with his own strength, and that was how he remained to be himself this entire time despite bearing a horrible past on his shoulders.

But Levi was the one who believed that he was all alone, and that wasn’t true.

The ice on his veins thawed and he was thankful that Eren was there beside him to provide him what he needed the most—warmth and a home to come back to. Yes, they would go home after resolving all this craziness. They would go back to bed and cuddle for hours, drinking in the feelings and _love_ that they harbored for each other. They would be together, just like before.

But…

All of a sudden, all hells broke loose.

Alarms went off and shuffles of heavy boots clattered from outside of the study room. Ymir had successfully lit up the flare.

Levi saw how Kenny was caught off-guard and the cunning man whose life was on his uncle’s hand just a moment ago had managed to knock off the gun that was pointed at him. Kenny stumbled backwards; processing the fact that Rod was even more skilled than he thought he was for he merely use the sleight of his hand in disarming him. Levi followed their movements, there were two people behind his back now, his hand was still wrapped around Eren, and he knew that he had to protect them. Even if it would cost him his life.

Kenny regained his ground but it was all too late. Levi’s eyes widened as Rod pulled out his own gun and pointed it at him. He squeezed the hand that he was holding because Eren was trying to press forward but Levi wouldn’t allow that. He had already let Eren turn away from him in his hopes of protecting Levi, but the raven would never let him do that again.

_We’ll be together. I’ll protect you._

“Levi!”

“Eren, stay behind me.”

“NO!”

“Eren—”

His voice turned pleading, “Don’t do this. I don’t want to see anyone die in front of me again.”

Levi held his tears at bay. He wouldn’t show his weakness now, but he knew that Rod had already realized how much he meant to Eren.

“Eren Jaeger,” Rod Reiss called out with a sneer on his face. “How do you think it would feel like to lose someone important to you again? Just come out and surrender yourself to me.” Rod swung the gun around them, as if he was playing a meenie-meenie-minie-mo and it made Levi’s stomach lurch in disgust.

There was a blur from Levi’s side and before he knew what he was going on, Historia Reiss had her arms spread out as if she was creating her own shield for the two of them. He cursed himself for not expecting the girl to do that—he’d been too preoccupied at toning his brat down that he couldn’t stop the other from rushing forward.

“You’ll have to shoot me before you get to them,” Historia stated without fear in her voice, and Levi immediately admired the girl even though he didn’t wish for her to do that.

Levi immediately saw Rod freeze and there was another figure that was fast at his movements that tackled the man to the ground with a grunt. Kenny took advantage of Rod’s moment of hesitation and Levi knew that this was their chance.

“Go!” Levi shouted to Historia whose feet seemed to be glued on the ground. Even after all the things that her father revealed to her and had attempted to do to them, Levi could see that she still cared for him. _Because he’s her family, just like how Kenny is for me_. But Levi had to see her get out of this alive because there was that one person outside who had put her trust on him in seeing this through. “Ymir is waiting for you!” That seemed to get her going and she ran to the door, glancing back at them because Levi was having a hard time of convincing Eren to _fucking move_.

Armin’s voice suddenly echoed in his ears, _“Levi! You have to leave the floor! You can take the elevators! Just go!”_

“Are you leaving him here?” Eren suddenly asked before he could respond to the blonde shouting orders to him in his earpiece. Those green eyes were trained on the men wrestling on the floor.

Levi couldn’t believe him. How could this person be concerned about the man who had murdered his family? He realized then that this was just how Eren was. He was a reckless individual with anger management issues but that was just scratching the surface of his character. He was also forgiving and he cared—he cared for Levi more than he allowed himself to feel the hatred that he should possess towards his enemy.

“Don’t worry about me, you brat! You should be glad that I’d be here to burn down with the rest of your enemies. GO! Levi, take him!” Kenny barked at them, pinning Rod’s wrists above his head and using his knee to press down on his chest that was winding the man’s breath away.

Levi tugged Eren, his blood was rushing to his ears and his head hurt, but he knew that he needed to be stronger than this. He made the brunet stumble on his step but he kept pulling—the exit was only a yard away. Outside of this room, they might face enemies or allies but they would be together. Eren would be alive and so would Levi.

“JAEGER!” Rod bellowed and when Levi looked back, he instinctively stepped forward in front of Eren when his eyes saw what happened. Kenny was pushed on his side and Rod got a hold of the gun, which was aiming at Eren’s head before Levi jumped in. “I WON’T LET YOU ESCAPE, EREN JAEGER!”

Then, he pulled the trigger.

The sound rang in his ears and suddenly, the sight of Kenny’s back filled his vision

Blood.

Tiny specks of it had splattered on his cheek.

Another gunshot. And another.

He was close.

So close.

When his uncle went down, collapsing on his knees, Rod’s hand was still on the trigger and Levi didn’t think. He just went to grab the other weapon lying on his uncle’s feet. And fired.

He knew where to fire the gun that would end the man’s life but he didn’t. His purpose wasn’t to kill. He didn’t want to be scum like the man Rod Reiss was. And Eren was behind him. Kenny was on the ground, blood pooling around him.

Levi felt sick. He managed to immobilize Rod, who was now lying on his back, probably unconscious but he didn’t care. He only saw red. Just red. Levi didn’t know that it was the same thing that Eren had seen when his mother died.

“Levi…” It was Eren who rushed to Kenny’s side. He was checking for his pulse and Levi almost laughed—he was an art major, wasn’t he? But he couldn’t even feel himself breathing as he watched his uncle bleed his life away.

His knees gave out and he could feel his black slacks soaking in that warm liquid. Eren was right next to him right now but it felt like his usual heat was far away. Because Levi felt cold. It was like his body didn’t have enough warmth to get going, and he could faintly hear Historia screaming for something—help, maybe.

Kenny’s eyes were half-closed, staring at the ceiling without any hint of emotion. But when Levi’s face came into view, it was as if something funny had come to life and he started wheezing a chuckle. He just managed to splatter blood all over himself, but there was that manic grin that remained on his face. Levi’s eyes didn’t travel farther down, afraid that if he were to see what state his uncle was in, he would break.

“Levi, Levi. You sure learned how to handle a gun yourself. I should’ve taught you how to aim at the heart,” he said. Eren was silent next to him, his hands were on his lap and he was not looking at Kenny. This man was the one who killed the most important people in his life after all, but Levi had a feeling that Eren didn’t want to see this scene for another reason.

Levi didn’t respond to his uncle and Kenny went on, “I can’t believe you— _cough_ —resorted to being a hero. To a Jaeger brat at that.” He laughed again as if it was an inside joke and he murmured, chest going up and down rapidly, “What a terrible fate it is.”

When he found his voice again, the first thing that left his mouth was, “Why did you leave me?”

Kenny didn’t answer for a while. He looked at the ceiling again and smiled wistfully. Levi thought he detected some sadness in that smile.

“Because I couldn’t be a parent.”

He then gave out one last shuddering breath and went still.

 

* * *

 

That night, Levi had lost his last family. And Eren was the one who shed tears for him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ...That chapter of SnK hit me hard and this is kinda a tribute to Kenny. Well, it is part of the whole plot, but my desire to erase the way I demonized Kenny at the beginning had grown LOL How many more chapters? That's right. Four more to go. Oh my.


	27. Happiness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The aftermath of the incident is not what Eren has expected at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ...I kinda cried while typing this chapter...so I guess that's a warning?  
>  An early update since I'm not gonna be at home at all tomorrow -v-

**I don’t own SnK**

* * *

 

_“It's so hard to forget pain, but it's even harder to remember sweetness. We have no scar to show for happiness. We learn so little from peace.”_

_― Chuck Palahniuk_

* * *

 

**~Chapter Twenty-Seven: Happiness~**

It was two weeks ago when Eren had almost met his tragic end in the hands of Rod Reiss. It was two weeks ago when he found out the truth behind his father’s death. It was two weeks ago when he saw Levi, blasting the doors open to save his ass from the richest man in the city—oh wait, that wasn’t true now, was it? The Reiss Corporation was now the number one controversial topic on all newspapers and magazines because a special FBI team had successfully unraveled what had smelled like rotten pig from the underground of the company. The new heir, Historia Reiss/Krista Lenz, was to step up on the throne soon and she had been working hard in her own way, because on the top of her list was to get back the mass’s trust once again. And Eren believed that she could do it—start anew and build a name that wasn’t tainted in the hands of her father.

Everything was going well, too well, when it came to the good side of this situation because the corrupt man was captured and was going to go through his trial soon, and the people were happy that he was finally caught. But the truth was, it was only one less criminal out there and they probably wouldn’t even expect half of the people they knew to be one of those “filthy, villainous beings” they called. Eren thought that everything would get resolved if he were to carry out the will of his parents, which was unexpected on his part because he had been kidnapped by the people that they were trying to expose, but he was wrong.

It had been two weeks already when he heard the truth behind Kenny Ackerman’s actions, and Eren felt hollow. His head became a jumbled mess once he heard those words from Rod Reiss— _just how ironic_ _is that?_ The man who had created this whole dilemma and had buried lies in many people’s graves was the one who said the truth about Levi’s uncle.

That Kenny did what he could in order to protect his only family.

But in return, the retribution fell on Levi’s shoulders, because he was the one who completely lost his last family left.

It had been two weeks since Eren had seen Levi. And he felt even emptier. His heart burst when he saw the lights from Kenny go out, like a firefly that had been stuck on the bark for too long to the point that its last shine was stolen away from the living thing by its terrible fate. Yeah, it was a real terrible fate. His tears had broken like a dam and before he knew it, he was crying over his enemy’s death, the one that he promised to get his revenge at.

And Levi didn’t— _couldn’t—_ shed a tear. It was as if he was a doll who had programmed movements after what happened and Eren knew how must he have felt like. His memories were wiped clean but when Eren had once again remembered the death of his mother, his heart never stopped crying. That was probably what Levi was feeling and Eren couldn’t comfort him, because he didn’t know _how_.

All this time, he’d only ran away from everything—from the people he cared about and loved—and he let the fear of losing these people paralyze him, immobilizing him from taking the right actions and he ended up leaving them. That was why he couldn’t think right now. He had no confidence in telling Levi that everything would be all right because he knew—he knew that it would _never_ be all right. Five years later and he still felt the pain of losing both of his parents, and he never considered that Levi must be hurting too this entire time and he had no idea.

He was selfish.

He didn’t stop and think what effects his actions could produce; he let his emotions run wild and cloud his judgments many times. He had been kidnapped, for Pete’s sake! How worried must Levi be during that time that Eren was absent by his side, and Eren wanted him to be out of the trouble that he was involved with. But he didn’t know that Levi was directly involved in the mess, something that he hadn’t expected.

When he turned away from Levi, the raven shouldn’t have forgiven him. He didn’t tell him the truth because he doubted Levi—he thought he wasn’t as strong as he actually was. And the regret that he was feeling threatened to rip his heart apart, but Levi accepted him once again. He let Eren feel what it felt like to be loved, and Eren failed to show how he loved him just the same, if not more than what Levi felt for him.

Eren didn’t know how to show that to him.

He wanted to run after Levi, pound on his door and demand for his appearance, because two weeks of being away from each other had honestly exceeded the most time they had been separated before. And it was internally killing Eren.

The last time he was at Levi’s house, the mess that he arrived at was something jaw-dropping and eye-bulging because Levi was…just Levi. Eren was afraid that it would be like that, or just worse—he really didn’t want to think about this but it could be true. He didn’t know what state Levi was in because he had been told to give him space by one of his friends, the eccentric Hanji who turned all solemn on him when he called her phone because Levi wasn’t answering his. That was the best indication Eren could get.

Levi didn’t want to see him.

The pencil that he was twirling in his fingers went flying to the floor next to his desk. The white drawing paper in front him was…blank. Eren wondered if it was a good idea to even attempt bringing out an art piece from his mind when it was full of nothing but Levi. He wished that he didn’t have to go visit Pixis but he couldn’t possibly refuse the man who had helped their case by providing the needed witness and evidence against Rod. Pixis had asked him to draw him a sketch out of the blue, just something, anything, and Eren was left to his own devices in his old classroom. There was no one around and he realized that he missed the chattering people who talked about their lives as their brushes stroke their canvas and their eyes followed every move of their hands.

Was he left behind?

Probably. But Eren didn’t regret it. He went to college because it was his parents’ wish for him and he had accomplished that, even though not completely. He was absolutely fine with getting a job for his daily expenses and for one of his goal, to get a house for himself. A home. But that was unnecessary, because there was no home like Levi. He was Eren’s home and he wanted to be next to him at this time, the next year to come, and even the ten or twenty or fifty years to come. He wanted to be there for him. He wanted to lend his shoulder to him and let him cry, pour his heart out to Eren like he had done when he expressed how much Eren meant to him. Maybe it was retaliation. He had left Levi after all, and that must have wounded him the most.

Eren bent down to grab the pencil that had fallen but stopped halfway.

How could he have been so stupid?

Levi was probably crying right now, having nightmares of his own, and constantly thinking _it’s my fault that that person died._

Eren bolted out of the classroom. He’d apologize later to Pixis for neglecting his work but he had to be there right now—right where his _home_ was. It wasn’t his dingy apartment with small space that he could barely fit a sofa and with his empty refrigerator that was causing his health to deteriorate. It wasn’t here in this classroom where he did nothing all day but draw and paint.

It was in that white house that contained that special room where Eren and Levi had hanged their memories together on the wall. It was their personal haven, where they could be together.

Why did he acquiesce to that stupid request anyway? Levi needed him. Just like how Eren did when he thought he had no one. And he would see Levi no matter what—even if he shut the door to his face. Because Eren loved him, and there was no other reason he would hold onto but that.

 

* * *

 

 

Hanji was nowhere in sight. Eren had been expecting the redhead to be guarding the gate with an apron around her waist, accessorized with cleaning products and kitchen knives, but she was really not there. All along, Eren had thought that she would gun him if he were to step one foot in front of the big house because of how she sounded over the phone, explaining how he needed to stay away. But apparently, he had been wrong all this time. And he felt even stupider that it took him two weeks to muster up the courage to finally go here.

Right in front of the place he considered his home.

He rang the doorbell but stayed out of the sight of the intercom because he couldn’t afford for Levi to be scared away by his appearance.

_“Who’s there?”_

He thought of not answering but that would’ve been dumb. Why was he there to begin with anyway? He really had no choice but to let the lawyer know that he was there.

“I-It’s Eren,” he croaked out, mildly turning red because he didn’t see that crack coming. He had never felt this nervous around Levi in a long time, not because there was that one massive secret that he was hiding behind his back, but because he didn’t know what would Levi’s reaction be. He just hoped that he really wouldn’t slam the door to his face.

_“…”_

Eren was almost afraid that Levi left, leaving him there in the almost-chilly night with the few stars clattered in the sky as his company. That would be a disaster, because he planned to stay out there to wait for Levi no matter what, even if his balls were to fall off because of the autumn winds.

There was a familiar click and the gates opened, almost like welcoming him but he thought otherwise because the dark surrounding that greeted him reminded him of a scary movie where the character was about to get delivered to his own doom. He couldn’t help but feel colder and he trudged his way to the front door and rang the doorbell. He waited for a minute before he decided to click the button again, thinking that maybe the machine had broken now of all times, but the door opened just when his index finger hovered over the device.

Levi didn’t wait for him and Eren was frozen on his spot for several moments before he finally snapped out of it and came in. He wasn’t really supposed to see Levi, right? He wondered if Hanji was going to make him pay for this; Levi’s friends were defensive when it came to their Shortstack. But Eren decided that he didn’t care the moment his eyes landed on the mess that he had been dreading during his train ride coming here.

…It was clean.

There was no speck of dirt on the table or the sofas or on the floor. No dirty shirts or smashed vases. It was _impeccably_ clean, and it brought a different foreboding feeling on Eren’s stomach.

This wasn’t what he was expecting at all.

“Levi,” he called out. The man’s back was turned on him and Levi was merely standing in front of the staircase like he was planning to leave Eren in his living room without uttering any word to him. Eren felt a sting in his chest, almost bringing his eyes to tears, but he knew that he had to get to the man before he could get kicked out of the house.

“Levi,” he called again, and this time, he saw the raven shift on his feet and he slowly turned to Eren.

He almost gasped the change in the man’s appearance—disheveled, exhausted, and unshaven. This wasn’t the man that had saved him—strong, determined, and loving—and Eren wanted nothing but to put his arms around him. There was something that was stopping him though, and it was that cold look in Levi’s eyes.

Like he wasn’t seeing Eren.

He cautiously approached the broken man, and it reminded him of himself when his memories had returned from him. He knew what Levi had been feeling because Eren was a mess back then too, and he couldn’t help but regret his decision of leaving the man that he loved. He wanted nothing but to protect the person that he cared about with all his heart. He just wanted them to be together.

“Levi,” he said softly, like he was approaching a small, cornered animal that could possibly dart away if Eren were to make the wrong move. And the similarity was almost scary because Eren didn’t want Levi to flinch away from him. But he did.

It brought some light in those silver eyes that Eren had loved so much, but there was pain in it. It was almost like Levi had seen Eren for the first time and the emotions that Eren was causing were coursing strongly to him. Eren feared that he would break.

“What do you want? You’re not supposed to be here,” Levi said to him coarsely. Eren stepped forward. Levi stepped back. He saw this so he completely stopped on his track.

“I wanna know how have you been. Levi, please,” he pleaded. There was nothing that he could do right now but to let his feelings out in the open, to leave him bare and raw from all that had happened to them. It was almost too much and Eren almost let his tears escape from his eyes, but he couldn’t do that. Not when Levi was the one who was most likely tearing from the inside.

“I’m fine, Eren. Just please, leave.” Levi’s voice was leveled, almost mechanically like he had rehearsed that line over and over. _I’m fine_ ; Eren knew that this was the biggest lie that they had ever said to each other.

He couldn’t help it. Eren had to get Levi out of that shell right now before he could totally lose him.

“How can anything be fine when you witness your family die?! Levi, tell me! You’re hurt and in pain and you blame yourself! Your uncle didn’t die—”

“YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND! How you understand when you’re one of the people who had kept me in the dark, Eren?! How can you possible tell what I’m feeling right now when you successfully carried out your parents’ wishes?”

Surprised, Eren stepped back. Levi’s eyes widened, probably shocked at his own words, but Eren couldn’t bother with that because his heart felt heavy. He regretted that he didn’t tell Levi the whole truth, but he was most regretful that it was one of the reasons why Levi was suffering right now. Because Eren couldn’t completely trust him. Because Eren fucked up the trust that Levi had given him.

“I’m sorry… I’m so sorry,” Eren sobbed out; his knees were collapsing on the floor and he couldn’t find the strength to face Levi. His tears finally ran down his face—he couldn’t hold them back any longer and he felt useless because he could only cry and beg. He was at Levi’s mercy, and now he knew what Levi felt the day he pleaded for Eren to stay at the beach. And it hurt. It fucking hurt like hell, and Eren couldn’t believe that he put Levi through this kind of pain.

“Eren, leave.”

No…

“We can’t see each other anymore.”

Those words completely halted his world—it completely stopped spinning and he wondered if he could still breathe, because he couldn’t feel his lungs functioning anymore. They were punctured by pain and Eren’s heart just broke into pieces once again.

Levi wanted him to leave. He wanted him out of his life.

And Eren had never felt lost like this in a really long time.

He thought of it; how would it be like when Levi was out of his life, without his driving his Maserati around with Eren enjoying every scenery they would pass by, without his cooking that Eren had grown used to having every morning, without his warmth that he had fallen asleep to so many times because he knew that he would be safe in his arms, without his kisses that provided the reassurance of his love. How would it be like if Levi were not there anymore to tell him how much he loved Eren?

“No… Please, don’t. Anything but that…” Eren begged, hands were limp on his lap and eyes were downcast.  He didn’t notice the footsteps that were going to his direction but Levi stopped just a foot away from him.

“Eren. I don’t want us to hurt each other anymore, so _please_. Please, just leave.” Levi’s voice cracked in the end and Eren looked up. There were tears falling from those silver eyes and one of them landed on Eren’s cheek. He wasn’t the only one hurting, he knew that—but he wanted to take away that pain from Levi. He wanted him to stop hurting to.

“If I leave,” he inhaled, feeling a bit dizzy, “will it make you stop blaming yourself? Will that make you happy?” He wanted to touch his hand, hanging lifelessly on his side but Eren didn’t know if he would be able to let go if he did. This was the end.

He had to accept that now.

Levi was silent and Eren took that chance to let his eyes memorize that face, because if this was really happening, then this would probably be the last time that he would get to see Levi. He searched those gray eyes that he fell in love with—even if they were lacking their luster right now, Eren wished that it would come back to them once he left—and he found nothing. He wished he could read Levi well like how the raven could when it came to Eren, but there was no way of that happening now, was there?

“We can’t stop the past from coming to get us. We’ll never be happy.”

Eren followed the way his lips move and he wished that he could kiss those tears away, but he had no ability to do that.

Why did he come here anyway? Was this what he wanted to happen?

He opened his mouth to speak and had to swallow back that big lump that was hindering his voice.

“Levi, did you regret meeting me?”

Eren remembered. He remembered the day he had broken up with Jean at the amusement park and he had cursed and felt bad for himself for having been stood up. Now he knew the reason why Jean had done that. He remembered the day he bumped to that short stranger and his phone came flying away from his hand. He remembered looking at the man, ready to curse the living daylights out of him, but he was stopped by his piercing glare. He remembered crying embarrassingly loud and the stranger took him to the rides and they filled their hearts with content and happiness despite their day starting out as a shitty one. He remembered meeting Levi. He remembered how his kiss felt like and how taken he was by him.

Now he knew why.

Because Fate was terrible.

She made the two of them fall in love with each other, them not knowing anything about their pasts and what had led them to that point of their lives.

They were _in love_.

And Eren wanted nothing but to go back on that day and remain stuck there, because that was where he belonged—the moment where they didn’t care about the whole goddamn world because they were busy loving each other.

“You’re the best thing that happened to me, Eren.”

There were no lies. There were only truths. So why was his heart breaking?

“But I want you to live a life where you won’t ever remember this. All of this that happened because of me.”

Ah. So Levi was blaming himself. Why?

“If he didn’t protect me… If—If he just left me alone, you would still be with your parents and he… he would still be alive.”

Eren stared. Levi’s face was contorting in pain and his bangs were sticking on his forehead. This was the man who had been feeling guilty because he believed that he was the cause of this whole mess.

Was it too much to ask for this person to be happy? Why was he doing this for him when he was obviously hurting the most?

“Eren, go.”

“Levi,” he finally spoke, eyes falling on the floor once again. “Why do you believe that it’s your fault?”

He was met with silence and it almost prompted him to look up again, but Eren didn’t. Not until he heard his answer.

“Because I don’t understand why am I worth fighting for, when you’re worth so much more.”

There was a new flood of tears that followed that, and Eren had nothing in mind but a cloud of unfathomable things and emotions that were threatening to burst down from his chest. He couldn’t take this anymore. How could he make Levi believe otherwise? That what he was saying was completely wrong because Eren knew. He knew that everyone was given a chance to prove themselves and they were all worthy.

Did Levi know how much he meant to Eren?

He found the strength to stand up, steadying one leg at a time, and this had made Levi stand back from him. Eren didn’t look at him until he was balanced on his own two feet. His eyes never left Levi’s afterwards even though those gray eyes were not focused on him, as if he was distracted by other things. And Eren knew that it was too early.

Or probably already too late.

He let the stillness stretch before them and then he took the opportunity to save one last look around his haven— _their_ haven. He didn’t think that this would be the last time that he would be able to set foot here. He didn’t even know if the decision that he was about to make would make a difference, but he hoped that he would give Levi what he wanted.

“Levi.”

Those gray eyes met his and he forced himself to smile, even though his lips had caught one of his tears.

“I’ll fight for you everyday if I have to. I’ll make you smile no matter how many times I do it, just so I can see it everyday. Because there’s no reason for me to stop loving you.”

He stopped himself at the thought of touching him one last time. Levi’s eyes were glistening with fresh tears and he wanted to kiss them away. And so he did.

He leaned closer to the shorter man, smiling fondly at their height difference that the raven couldn’t get over with. He then pressed closer until there was only one breath away between his lips and his eyelashes before he closed that distance. He kissed that wet drop away, wanting to bring his fingers to his cheeks so he could wipe them away but stopped himself from doing so. He just continued to do that but his tears were endless. He tasted the salty tang of Levi’s guilt, the sweetness of his wishes for Eren, the bitterness of the hatred that he felt for himself—Eren kissed them away, but they didn’t halt. It was as if it was Levi’s way of telling him to stay. But he had said it earlier—Levi had told him what he wanted.

He brought his lips close to his temple and he closed his eyes, feeling his tears roll down his cheek.

“Be happy, Levi.”

It was the most sincere wish he had. And Eren left Levi that night, standing near the door that had shut loudly in the empty house.

Eren felt like he just left half of his heart in that house, and he couldn’t get it back unless his wish were to come true.

Levi’s happiness…that was all he was asking for.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ...My tears didn't stop flowing while typing this chapter and I blame all the heartbreaking fanart I've seen on my dash... (on a different note, here is my tumblr: http://lilstrawberrychi.tumblr.com). We're approaching the end, guys (and I'm legit approaching the end of my high school career--prom and graduation and that's it for me TvT) But there will be a beginning--a new story and a new school for me XD


	28. Love Conquers All

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mamabear Hanji comes to the rescue.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uh yeah... Last chapter was cruel... BUT this will probably make everything a bit better :D Early update because I'll surely be busy this week... And the next week (I'll be on vacation but I'll have my laptop with me ;))

**I don’t own SnK**

* * *

 

_“The strongest love is the love that can demonstrate its fragility.”_

_–Paulo Coelho_

* * *

 

 

**~Chapter Twenty-Eight: Love Conquers All~**

Hanji had seen many couples in her life, at high school, at the university, and she thought that they were such ignorant, lovesick fools. And she envied them. She was jealous of them for many reasons—because she wasn’t capable of understanding completely what love was and she wasn’t sure if anyone would be able to put up with her odd personality that seemed to fend off anyone who came close to her within a feet radius. It was ridiculous, but Hanji remembered falling in love once. It was scary; because the man named Moblit had somehow interested her more than how science and discovering new things could fascinate her. She thought it was _utterly_ ridiculous. She attempted to come up with any scientific explanation for one individual’s attraction to another, but it was really incomprehensible.

Moblit died protecting a child during one of his squad’s operations.

And Hanji never thought that she would feel an immense pain after hearing the news. That was why she couldn’t even begin to imagine what kind of suffering was Levi going through right now. Or what Eren Jaeger had gone through during those five years he had lost his memories.

Mike’s team had successfully infiltrated the underground business. Rod Reiss was successfully captured. Eren and Historia were safe. No one died. No one on their side, at least. Hanji knew that Levi’s heart had dealt a grave injury because he lost his only family right in front of his eyes. Levi and Eren were forcibly ripped away from each other afterwards because of the great alarm that they triggered in the building, and all of them had gone through the scrutiny of the police department but with a lesser degree because of Mike and Erwin.

They were protected, but Levi had already suffered.

It was Eren who called her after the third day they all hadn’t seen each other, and he immediately asked her about Levi.

_“Have you talked to Levi? Please, Hanji, tell me. I haven’t seen him and he hasn’t answered my calls—”_

_“Eren. Stay away from Levi for now. Give him space and don’t come anywhere near him. He needs it. If you really care for him, then you’ll do that.”_

She hadn’t meant for the kid to not show up for two weeks though. She might have been a little more solemn than her usual attitude, which was what had most likely worried Eren, but she just wanted Levi to be alone. That wasn’t what she believed he needed though, but she knew him—that stubborn man would probably say something that he would regret later on if he were to meet Eren in his current state. But she also knew that he would overthink things, and she just wanted to bet that Levi would come around soon.

It wasn’t after those two weeks that Levi hadn’t interacted with anyone—having him brought his work to his home during that period of time—that Hanji had finally went to his house. She remembered being roughly kicked out the first day she tried to comfort the lawyer with a case of beers and some expensive wine. He told her to leave him alone and not to bother him for a while, and now… that ‘a while’ wasn’t exactly telling her any good. So she broke into his house. You couldn’t possibly call it ‘breaking in’ though—she merely used the key that Levi gave Erwin in case of emergency.

There was no mess in the living room when she arrived there, which spiked her curiosity since the last time she was here, the place was in utter disarray. The lights were not turned on but there was a dimmed light in the kitchen. It could only mean that…

She nearly screamed when Levi appeared behind her, standing on the last step of the staircase and looking at her but… not really looking at her. Her lips formed in a tight line as she watched Levi stare at her without light in his eyes.

“What happened to you? Did you suddenly become inspired in cosplaying as a caveman? I thought you hated cosplaying?” she joked, forcing her lips to tug upwards into a grin. Not of that was returned as Levi merely swiveled around and went on his way to the kitchen. Hanji could really use some Erwin sense right now—she assumed that she would be able to handle this man but she guessed that it would be harder than she thought.

Two weeks. Her mind clicked on that fact and she wondered if Eren had already come by, because no matter how ridiculous she thought it was to be in love with someone, those two were probably close to making her believe otherwise. That it was possible to love and be loved with all your heart, to erase all the doubts away and the clouds of despair when that person was by your side—that it was okay to believe that you could trust someone completely.

She wanted to put her confidence that Eren and Levi were destined to be with each other—because they had risen up against any obstacles that were presented in their way. Because she wanted to believe that it was possible for two people to obtain complete happiness.

“Do you want water or something, Glasses?”

 _His jab is too weak_ , she mused. Her eyes flew on the shoe rack by the front door and they widened as they saw a familiar pair of green sneakers, situated next to the rack haphazardly. Why didn’t she notice it? A pair of house slippers was missing, which could only mean that someone took it by accident and left _his_ shoes here.

“Eren was here, wasn’t he?”

Her tone was accidentally accusing and she saw Levi freeze in the corner of her eye. _Tch. Was I too late?_

“…What of it?”

Her eye twitched and her chest began to heave up and down. She couldn’t take it anymore. She strode to the raven who was about to continue on his tracks and she grabbed his collars, half-expecting some kind of resistance from him but nothing came. It was like he was just a ragged doll, not caring if he were toss around.

“YOU LET GO OF HIM?” She shouted at his face but he didn’t give away any emotions to her and it made her grip his shirt tighter. She noted how he was unshaven and was looking rather a miserable hobo—if given another circumstance, she would’ve laughed because there was no way that Levi would just take this kind of uncleanliness. But that same person she knew, the one who would whack her in the head if he were to find out that she didn’t wash her hair for two days, the one who would smile fondly at their memories even though his smiles were supposed to be a secret from them, the one who thanked her when she gave him the push to get the person he loved— _that_ Levi was gone.

“Why…?” She couldn’t control the tears that sprung up to her eyes. “Didn’t you say that he’s your everything?”

She was met with silence but it wasn’t for long that she got to hear his answer.

“Because I failed. I couldn’t protect him, Hanji.”

His response sounded automatic and she expected herself to feel pity for her friend but rage was the one that came coursing through her veins. She gritted her teeth and yelled, “YOU’RE AN IDIOT! EREN DOESN’T NEED A FUCKING CAPTAIN AMERICA OR A FUCKING SUPERMAN! HE JUST NEEDS _YOU_ , LEVI!”

She roughly let go of his collars and wiped her snot away, not giving a damn that she was in front of the former clean freak that she once knew. She looked at him with spite sparkling in her eyes, letting him know how angry she was because _he’s just stupid as fuck._

“Eren called me two weeks ago, asking me how have you been but I told him not to come and talk to you,” she told him. She noted how he was downcast, but she knew that he was definitely listening now. No matter what happened, Levi had always been the first to wish Eren’s safety and whereabouts. Even if he had turned Eren away, Hanji knew that he would never cast Eren aside. These were the two people who had given their hearts to each other, and she doubted that there would be anything that could stop Levi from caring.

She closed her eyes and took off her glasses, listening as Levi silently dropped into a squat, probably staring at the glass windows where the darkness were only saved by a couple of fireflies in the back garden. She didn’t think that there could be anything worse than the situation she had arrived at when Eren broke up with Levi, but this time proved otherwise. She’d never seen Levi as closed-off as this, and she wondered if the light that could light up the darkness that he was in would be able to come back in Levi’s arms. He needed Eren, any idiot could figure that one out—but the main idiot here was wallowing in his own self-hatred and regret. How could she possibly bring him back?

She then remembered the one thing that she hadn’t told anyone. She figured that Mike or Erwin probably knew already, but she was one of the few people who had witnessed it.

“That kid…Levi, he cares about you more than anyone else. He wouldn’t care if you weren’t strong; did you honestly forget that he broke off your relationship because he was trying to protect you? He loves you that much,” she told him sincerely, opening her eyes to see Levi sitting on the carpeted floor with his eyes unblinking and staring forward.

“He didn’t tell me everything. He lied to me,” Levi silently muttered.

Hanji felt a sting sent to her chest and she said, “You and I know that that’s not the reason. You’re just bullshitting around now. You’ve already settled on this just a couple of weeks ago, Levi.”

It was true. And Hanji knew exactly why he was saying this.

It was his _excuse_.

She continued when she knew that she wasn’t going to get a response from the man. “You’re trying to blame the fact that no one trusted you enough to tell you what was truly going on, because you hate it. You hate how you seem powerless because you had been protected all this time. It’s not because no one trusted you—it’s because you didn’t get to do anything _for_ them.”

Levi looked at her slowly and she readily returned his gaze with intensity enough to light up the other’s eyes. She wanted him to argue with her, fight her like he used to, because _that_ was Levi. He wouldn’t take shit from anybody and he wouldn’t go down without a fight. But there was no immediate reply from him, like he was just taking everything but not giving anything. Hanji grew frustrated.

“What did you tell Eren, Levi?” she asked, afraid to hear his answer because if Eren was distraught enough to not take his shoes with him, then that could only be a bad thing.

She thought Levi wasn’t going to respond at all, that was why she was a bit startled when a spark had lit up in his eyes, as if recognizing— _remembering_ —something, and he told her, “I told him that we will never be happy, that our pasts will always catch up to us. And it’s fucking _true_.”

Her heart squeezed. She clenched her fists by her side even though she wanted nothing but to punch the daylights out of Levi. She couldn’t help the words that came out from her mouth afterwards. This was the only way to knock some sense to this idiot.

“I saw Eren after Kenny’s funeral. And guess what he was doing, Levi,” she asked with a sad smile on her face. Levi was visibly paying attention to her now and the tears that were kept at bay rolled down her cheeks once again, but she rubbed them on her sleeves hastily.  She resumed, not bothering to wait for a response, “He threw it away, Levi. The flash drive.”

Levi’s eyes widened in shock, lips were parting and hands suddenly came to grip his knees. He was staring at Hanji with emotion in his silver eyes now—disbelief was the one that she recognized. He was probably willing her to retract her previous statement but Hanji couldn’t do that. She kept that information from everyone else who was involved in the case and she knew that Mike and Erwin would come up with something to explain that to the people who knew. That flash drive was priceless evidence, and the young man at the center of all of it had thrown it away.

“Do you know what he did, Levi? Eren threw it away because he wants to start over again! He’s not going to use it against Rod Reiss. He did it for YOU! Because he…” She swallowed the lump in her throat and dropped down into a squat because her knees suddenly gave away. “He _loves_ you that goddamn much.”

Hanji looked at Levi, lips were quivering, and watched as tons of emotions came flickering across his face and she was sure that this was it. This was the push that he needed. Even though he already acted against his will and because of his conjectures, Hanji hoped that Levi would be brave enough to turn the situation over.

“I…I told him that…” Levi’s voice cracked and she saw his gray eyes glistening, making her eyes grow big. Seeing him crying twice in a row made Hanji realize that Levi was as fragile as any other human being—that he wasn’t as strong as he made out to be. _But that’s because Eren is not by his side._

“It doesn’t matter, does it?” she asked, smiling at him with hope written all over it. “Eren will be waiting for you, Levi. It’s not that he’s throwing away his past, but he doesn’t want it to bring him down. He doesn’t want revenge to cloud his heart because he knows what he _has_ right now. He’s happy because he’s with you, and I think… I think that’s really what matters. The present. The past may hurt you from time to time but you two have each other. The future may be scary and unpredictable but you two will overcome it if there’s a challenge ahead of you. The present is what matters because you still _can do_ something to change your course. You can’t be held back by the past or be frightened by the future; you have Eren, and Eren has you. You have me, Erwin, Isabel and Farlan. You have the whole operation crew and your own squad, Petra, that Auruo, Gunter, and Erd. We’re all here for you.”

Levi was sobbing audibly now but he hid his face from her, tucking it away in his arms resting on his knees. Hanji moved closer and patted his hair. Her own tears were falling but she paid no heed to that—she knew that she finally got through Levi. Finally. And she wanted nothing else but to paint his face with a smile, just like he had been when Eren was around.

If Levi, the unthinkable enemy of all in the court, could crack down into this crying mess of a fool because of one bright-eyed brat, then Hanji really believed that love could change anything. She realized that the words that she uttered were one of the truest statements she’d ever said in her life.

The first and foremost being those three words she’d said to Moblit.

_Love conquers all._

* * *

Hanji had somehow—barely, even—calmed down Levi. He was a mess earlier and she really expected him to run after Eren just like last time, but he couldn’t even look at her. She knew why—he was ashamed of what he had done. He was venting his grief, his frustration, and his anger on the people who didn’t deserve it but Hanji understood. She knew that Eren also understood that, being the one to go through the similar situation. She was more worried about the fact that Eren hadn’t called her. She was, after all, the one who had forbade him to see Levi but he actually broke that rule just hours ago.

She made tea for the both of them, a bit surprised that Levi allowed her to do so; he wasn’t really too keen about other people, besides from Eren, making his tea. It made her smile because one of the personal privileges was bestowed upon Eren, the college kid who surpassed Hanji and Erwin in terms of coaxing Levi out of his bubble.

She almost dropped the cups on the way to the living room when she heard Levi speak.

“Do you think he’ll forgive me? I said some shitty things to him, Four-Eyes.”

She sighed and smiled. Setting down the cups on the center table, she proceeded to reassure him, “Eren would want you to be happy, Levi. Just like why you thought that letting him go would make him happy. But both of you are stupid lovesick fools, obviously.” She huffed and looked pointedly at the impassive man. “You’re too blinded by regret, which is why you failed to see that being by next to each other is what gives the two of you the strength—to remain strong.”

Levi looked thoughtful for a moment and he reached for his tea. Hanji took a sip as Levi did and she watched his reaction over the rim of her cup. As expected, his face scrunched up like he had just tasted the newest flavor of all time.

“This is shit,” he commented. Hanji laughed heartily but careful not to spill her drink.

“Because you look like shit,” she retorted. It was true though, and she almost commented ‘that’s why Eren hurriedly left the house’ but she knew when to stop pushing his buttons. She already got to witness his crying face, and that was enough blackmail material for him. She would be expecting him to return the favor when she needed it—the thought made her smirk mischievously.

Suddenly, her phone rang and tore the tranquility that had settled over them. She picked it up from her back pocket and turned to the window that showed her that she should really be getting home soon.

_“Ms. Hanji?”_

It was Armin and Hanji frowned the slightest because she had been getting a lot of phone calls regarding the big incident recently, but none of them were from Armin.

“What’s up?” she asked, putting up a cheery mood. She didn’t want to ruin the whole calmness that she finally achieved. Levi was one difficult man to deal with.

 _“…Actually. Have you talked to Levi?”_ Armin Arlert sounded nervous and even though it sent a trickle of nervousness behind her back, she maintained her persona and completely swiveled around from Levi before standing up.

“I’m just gonna talk to this dork,” she told him over her shoulder and Levi merely gave her a glance. She took that chance to go to the kitchen again and finally spoke on her phone again, “What’s going on, Mushroom?”

_“…Mushroom? Wait—That’s not why I called you. You’re with Levi, aren’t you?”_

“Yes, I am. And Mushroom because it’s cute. C’mon, just spill the beans.”

_“This…This is kinda an emergency. I don’t know if you’ve heard but it’s highly likely that you have not.”_

Her smile faltered. “What is it, kid? You’re making Mama Bear nervous.”

_“Ms. Hanji. It’s about Eren…”_

 

* * *

 

She looked at the back of the head of the raven. She was sweating profusely now; just having to process Armin’s words just a few minutes ago took an effort to swallow it down. She began biting her thumb. How the hell was she going to break the news to Levi? The man had already gone through mental and emotional breakdown just thirty minutes ago for Christ’s sake! How could she possibly be cruel enough to damage him any further?!

Hanji let out a big exhale, closing her eyes because she thought that maybe a three-minute meditation would actually help. She wasn’t finished counting to fifteen when someone blew on the back of her neck and she screamed bloody murder.

Right behind her was Levi and she felt her temple twitch because that was twice in the row now, too. He was looking casual and ever-so- _Levi_ now, which was a good thing minus his shitty humor and shitty surprises, but that was better than the moping Hamlet-like person she’d encountered just half an hour ago.

“You made me remember why I tried to make you dress up as Dobby two years ago for Halloween,” she simply told him. That earned a kick in the shin and she yelped. Well, old Levi was definitely back.

The only problem was that she knew what would make him revert back to the depressed moss he was earlier, and she’d rather not have that.

“Who was that?” he asked and Hanji was reminded that she was awful at lying. Her lips trembled and she snapped them shut. How would she tell him?! He would freak!

“Oi. I’m talking to you, Glasses,” Levi said, narrowing his eyes on her. She almost forgot that there was a reason why this man was feared inside the court. He would pull everything out of you without effort and that was only because he was cunningly clever like that—all for the people he believed had deserved justice.

“A-Armin,” she stuttered out. Levi didn’t leave his eyes on her and she knew that he was expecting her to say more. It was now or never, and Hanji would bet that her life would be on the line if she were to remain quiet now.

“…You’re not hiding anything from me, Hanji, are you?”

Boom. Of course, he would pull out that dreaded question. If there was anything that Levi was sensitive of right now, it would be lies. Hanji didn’t want to press on a fresh wound any further but the truth that she was about to give to Levi would be ten times painful than the other simple lies he’d heard. Hanji opened her mouth, a cease between her eyebrows was forming, and she carefully observed Levi’s reaction as she repeated the words that Armin had said.

“Eren… Eren is packing his bags to go to Japan. Levi,” she looked at him apprehensively, “Eren is leaving New York.”

Levi’s eyes widened, shock was obviously written all over his face, and his mouth kept opening and closing as if he couldn’t find the words to say. He then bent his head down, preventing Hanji from seeing his expression any further but she could only imagine what emotional turmoil he was going through right now.

He had already sorted out everything inside him but then this bomb came and Hanji wasn’t sure anymore of how could she possibly fix it.

But then, Levi spoke with utter certainty present in his voice and Hanji was surprised at the gravity of his conviction.

“Hey, Hanji. Can you accompany me?”

She smiled fondly, nodding and saying, “Sure thing, Shortstack.”

There was that determination in those gray eyes that were dull and lifeless just a while ago. There was that fire that was blazing bright and Hanji could almost pat him on the back, but she didn’t want to taste one of his infamous moves right now. She’d rather continue being Levi’s most helpful friend at the moment.

“I’m gonna go get Eren.”

 

* * *

 

Just two weeks ago, Eren was the one who called off the relationship he had with Levi. And now that it was Levi’s turn, Hanji couldn’t help but think _they have a_ very _rocky future ahead of them._ Everyone in their group of friends would think that if they were to look at the victims of the situation they were put under, and Hanji didn’t doubt that a certain dark-haired girl would be the first one to raise her hand to object to this ill-fated relationship that Eren and Levi had.

But the thing was, everyone also knew how much they loved each other. They knew that Eren would sacrifice everything for Levi and Levi would give everything to Eren. That was why Hanji wasn’t surprised at the current circumstance that she got herself into.

She dropped off Levi, which was something that made her jaw drop and stare at the raven for a good minute because _Levi is actually agreeing to get inside my car, like what the fuck. Are the birds migrating backwards now?_ She couldn’t help but appreciate the moment and there was also that very fact that Levi put a plastic bag under his seat because he was _afraid to touch your fucking germs. God knows what else are in here_. She was very amused nonetheless, no matter how much they were in a hurry.

She kept things light during the ride, by saying that Eren couldn’t possibly go on the plane at such short notice and that maybe Armin hadn’t said it right because he was lacking details. But even Hanji didn’t know what was really going on; Eren was just there at Levi’s house early this evening! How could everything go shit right away? But everything probably went shit already the second Levi pushed Eren away.

Levi didn’t say anything back but he scrunched his eyebrows together and threatened Hanji that he would kick her out of her seat and throw her on the street if she didn’t keep her eyes on the road. There was a nervous jitter around them and Hanji kept her mouth shut the rest of the ride afterwards.

When they arrived at Eren’s apartment complex, Levi immediately unbuckled his seatbelt and jumped out of his seat. Hanji couldn’t help but smile at the sudden analogy of a hero rescuing his damsel in distress, the very same thing that she just mentioned earlier to Levi.  The only thing that Levi could do in this situation was to stop Eren from leaving, after he had told the brunet those inconsiderate things that he didn’t mean.

She was all alone in the car when her phone rang again and this time, she looked at the caller ID and was glad that Armin was calling again. She wanted to ask the mushroom blonde about what he had just said earlier; she didn’t manage to call him back because Levi was trying to get to his destination as fast as he could. Hanji couldn’t help but feel surprised—she’d never seen her friend act that desperate before. _Only Eren could make Levi a mess._

She didn’t bother with the greeting as she picked her phone and began talking, “Armin! You should’ve told me what time is Eren’s flight! You’re totally freaking me out—”

_“Uh… about that. I’m guessing that Levi is already there?”_

She was confused. “Yes, he is.”

There was a sigh on the other line and Hanji grew a bit impatient, about to ask the blonde what was going on and to answer her question earlier.

_“Sorry. But Mikasa and I devised a little plan…”_

Everything clicked then. Of course, it wasn’t believable that Eren was leaving in a matter of hours and there was no way that he would be doing that without telling Levi, no matter what state their relationship was. But it was credible in the lawyer’s eyes—because Eren meant so much to him. Hanji never thought that such trick would work on Levi, of all people, but she would be more shocked if he were to sit around and do nothing if that kind of news about Eren were to be served to him.

_They used Levi’s desperation. And I can’t say that it’s not the quickest way to bring the reunion of the two._

_“…Eren’s not leaving tonight but…”_

_Uh—_

_“…He’s leaving next week. That’s why, Levi better get Eren back or else… It’s now or never.”_

_Well, holy crap._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *looks away* Next chapter may be where everything will finally be all good :D
> 
> Btw, I finally graduated from high school :) College will be the next stop! I really wanna know if some of you guys are nearby XvX


	29. The Warmth of Your Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hope... That's the only thing he can cling onto. Levi is willing to give everything in order to get Eren back, if it means he can start over again with him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OMG THE SECOND TO THE LAST CHAPTER TTvTT

**I don’t own SnK or that certain phrase from the last part of this chapter (it’s from the movie, _The Vow_ )**

* * *

  _“If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day, so I never have to live without you.”_

_–A.A. Milne, Winnie the Pooh_

* * *

 

**~Chapter Twenty-Nine: The Warmth of Your Love~**

Levi ran.

He ran to the fucking stairs when he was sure that he was out of Hanji’s sight. He wouldn’t let her see how desperate he was, even though it must have been already pretty obvious when they had that talk earlier. Yeah, he definitely wanted to get to Eren on time—he didn’t want to see an empty apartment if he were to open his door with the key that the brunet had entrusted upon him. He was thankful that in his hazy and confused state of mind hours ago, he didn’t give Eren back his key. Exchanging one of the most mundane yet important things that they possessed was another sign of their trust on each other. Levi just hoped that he didn’t completely mess up.

He arrived in front of the familiar door wheezing—two weeks of secluding himself in that hole of a big house of his was sure a bad idea, mentally and physically—and he didn’t waste time to raise his fist to knock. His hand stopped midair though, remembering that Eren might not want to see him or worse, maybe he was already on the way to the airport.

It was ridiculous. Levi couldn’t fathom how could Eren possibly disappear in a matter of a short time and it got the raven’s heart beating painfully against his chest. What if Eren was really not in this room anymore? What if Levi arrived at a scene of a most harsh breakup, with everything cleaned out and with no trace of his beloved artist? What would he do if he had already lost Eren?

He pulled the key from the pocket of his jeans, thankful that he didn’t forget to bring it in the midst of the chaos in his mind after he had heard the news about Eren. Who wouldn’t go crazy if you were to find out that the only one that you’d ever loved was leaving you behind and might never come back? It frightened Levi. He was scared that one of his nightmares would come true. And it would be his entire fault.

It was him who pushed Eren away, thinking that some distance between them would make everything better—that they wouldn’t be able to hurt each other because of this terrible fate that entangled their lives together. But it was wrong. It _felt_ wrong. Levi hadn’t felt as hurt as he was now, without Eren on his side, and he knew that he made the terrible choice when Hanji told him about the flash drive. He told Eren that the past would do nothing but remind them that they weren’t supposed to be together in the first place, but Eren called that bullshit. He threw away the only evidence that could potentially lead Rod Reiss to his final downfall, and it was all for the hope that he would be able to start anew again. And Levi knew that Eren was thinking about doing that with him.

Levi didn’t know what Eren had done, and now he was regretting every bit of what he had said to him. He filled the brunet with lies and he realized that he didn’t have a right to be angry with Eren when he did the same thing to him. They were protecting each other, even if it was the wrong method. The past might be scary and painful but as long as they had each other, they could move forward and treat this incident as a proof that they fought. They fought and won.

But the winning part wouldn’t be evident if Levi were to back out now.

He inserted the key into the knob and opened the door without hesitation. What greeted him made him freeze on his track.

There was no light inside, no lamps that were turned on and forgotten, no laptops that shed light to the room with an essay waiting to be finished, no iPod that was playing their favorite music—it was like… a stranger’s living room. Levi didn’t want to go in any farther but he had to, if he wanted to see Eren. His stomach lurched at the thought that he was already too late, that maybe coming here was a mistake and that he should’ve been at the airport. He swiftly walked towards the bedroom and his heart throbbed as he pressed his clammy hand around the knob of the door. When he pushed it open, he prayed that he would be able to see that silly smile on that lean brunet again, and those ocean green eyes that he loved so much.

What he didn’t expect was for that person to be haphazardly lying on the bed with… streaks of tears on the sides of his face, and his blanket strewn across his body, barely covering his one leg that was naked for Levi to see. The raven wanted to curse the young man for being so fucking oblivious because _how could he still be sleeping when someone had already broke into his fucking apartment?!_ But the relief and the happiness were spreading to his chest fast and before he knew it, the tears from his eyes just came out and rolled down his cheeks. He slumped on the floor, arms were propped on his legs as he continued to gaze on the sleeping brunet, afraid that the scene would pop like a bubble and disappear.

He didn’t know for long had he been there, on the ground and crying like a child, but he was a bit caught off-guard when he heard the rustling of the blankets and he knew that Eren was stirring awake. What was he doing anyway? Shouldn’t he be waking Eren up and not staring at him like a complete stalker who managed to invade his private room? Wait, would that even count as stalking if they were lovers— _ex-lovers_? Probably. Mulling over those questions wouldn’t really help him though, because Eren was slowly opening his eyes and groaning. _I don’t remember him being a light-sleeper…_

Those ocean green eyes that Levi had been anticipating to see every single second were revealing themselves to them and the raven almost forgot to breath. He figured that Eren was registering what was going on around him because it took him a solid fifteen seconds of looking at Levi with a drowsy expression before he snapped out of it. The brunet immediately sat up and Levi worried that he would drop headfirst to the ground by how he swayed side-to-side. _Idiot…_

“Le- _Levi_?!” Eren exclaimed, eyes were comically wide as saucers and Levi almost snorted. Eren Jaeger would always give him the most interesting reactions ever. This was one of the things that he loved about him.

He sighed. There was really no way out of this—wait, in the first place, wasn’t he supposed to talk to him anyway? He just really didn’t expect the young man to be sleeping at this time. _He must have been exhausted. Just what did he do after he saw me?_

“Wh-Why are you here?” The green-eyed man asked him, blinking rapidly to remove the sleepiness out of him. Though, the sudden appearance of Levi had probably already woken the living daylights out of him. 

“That… Uh,” Levi coughed to swallow the bile of nervousness blocking his throat. Why couldn’t he just talk to him as normally as he could? _Nothing’s really normal about it. I was the one who practically told him to stay the fuck away._ He looked away, trying to come up with a decent conversation-starter, but what was he supposed to say? _Sorry, I kinda trespassed into your apartment because I thought you were leaving me behind and moving to a country literally fucking halfway across the world. Anyway, do you think you can forgive me and please not leave?_

Yeah, right. Eren would probably give him one of those deadpanned looks like _are you fucking kidding me right now?_ Levi was never the one to talk smoothly, never the one to openly and easily express himself through words. He had moments where he could give out an endearing impromptu speech but those were reserved from the ones who could read him—the ones who knew him well. But now that Eren was right there in front of him, somehow, the words just wouldn’t come out and he was only glad that the urge to cry was finally gone.

“Were you crying?” Eren suddenly asked, and Levi whipped his head to the side to hurriedly wipe away the tears that could lead the brunet to asking him that question. Of course, there were streaks of tears and it might be because of the moonlight that Eren managed to see that. How come his room was lit while the rest of the place was dark anyway?

“I—I wasn’t.” Fuck. His voice cracked.

There was silence on the other side and that prickling sensation of someone intensely staring at him doubled and he knew that Eren was boring his eyes onto him. It prompted him to turn and look at his lov— _ex_ , and wow, how he hated correcting himself in his mind over Eren’s status in his life.

Eren was really staring at him and Levi was immediately drawn to him. He stood at the foot of his bed, awkwardly shifting his weight from one foot to another. Talk. He should really talk right now.

Eren changed his position, shuffling over to one side of his twin bed and patting the one equally spaced side next to him. Levi looked at him like he just grew four ears on his face but Eren smiled and that rapid heartbeat was back. Levi knew that he was visibly blushing because of the hot feeling in his face. How could he be embarrassed when he had already slept with this person many times? And those times were as intimate and loving as they always were. So how come this was making his stomach churn, like an unsettling but oddly pleasant feeling, and was making him lightheaded now?

No matter how long they were apart from each other, how come Levi could be affected this strongly by Eren?

He slowly walked up to his side and he sat on the bed, hearing it creak under his weight and feeling the little warmth that was left where Eren had occupied it. He removed his shoes and wished that he didn’t change his sweatpants into denim jeans. It wasn’t like he knew that Eren would be inviting him to bed right when they saw each other. But… he was happy. As Eren lied back down and Levi followed suit, they faced each other. The weight of the anxieties and fears was gone from his chest the longer he stared at those Caribbean eyes. He hoped that he could freeze the time so that they would remain in this cocoon of happiness. However, any bubble of content could burst any moment. He knew that by experience, and he also knew that this was no different.

“You’re leaving.”

Those words were simple but they were like sharp knives piercing his lungs. He continued to gaze at the angle of that tanned face and the small wrinkles forming from the constant laughs and smiles that Eren had given the world—had given _him_. The smile that tugged his lips upwards was a sad one, and Levi wished he could erase the remnants of melancholy from that expression. His smile was one of the things that he loved about Eren. The one that he wanted to protect.

“I am,” Eren responded. His eyes were shining and Levi knew that that wasn’t because of the light from outside.

He didn’t know what to say to him. He couldn’t even demand an answer because he didn’t deserve it. He avoided Eren for two weeks after what had happened to the Reiss Company, after what had happened to Kenny because he thought about it thoroughly—he thought that the best solution for everyone to stop hurting was for everyone to be separated. The same should also be applied to the two of them.

Kenny had died protecting Levi, the very reason why his uncle had killed the Jaegers and condemned himself as a sinner. He ought to feel grateful or happy that someone cared enough to do that for him, but instead, he felt angry and frustrated. But most of all, Levi hated himself. He knew that he was no superhuman—just like what Hanji said—but he wished that he could at least do something, just…anything. Anything just so that his uncle wouldn’t die like that or see Eren suffering from his trauma, but it was all too late. He realized that the web of threads that were connecting them together was all foreshadowing that great tragedy. He should’ve seen it, but he was too happy with Eren. He didn’t want to let go. So he let himself be blinded by love.

But… he realized one way to cut off those threads. Him. He needed himself to let go. He needed himself to open his eyes to the truth—the truth that he and Eren cannot be together. And this was the only way they would stop hurting.

He was wrong.

He didn’t want to lose him—those green eyes staring at him expectantly and unwavering, those lips that uttered those words that became his favorite because they were the most genuine he had ever heard in his life after his parent’s death. He didn’t want to lose his love. His love was the only thing that kept Levi sane and happy—very, very happy—and he knew that it was selfish, but he didn’t want to lose Eren Jaeger.

He wanted his past, his present, and his future. He wanted everything from him, just like how Levi was willing to offer his very self to Eren. He wanted to put his love and his trust on the line again because he knew—he knew that he would never regret it as long as Eren was by his side.

“I’m going with you,” Levi uttered. A tear rolled down to his side and Eren’s mouth parted in shock. He was looking at Levi with brightened eyes and it looked like he was struggling to find the words to reply to that. But he wasn’t nearly done. Just like what Eren had commented before, Levi wasn’t good at expressing his feelings through words. But for Eren, he would try.

“I’m sorry that I pushed you away. I can’t believe you had to go through that before just to protect me. I’m sorry that I couldn’t tell you anything—I was…I was angry. I was angry that I wasn’t able to do anything.” Eren opened his lips to say something but Levi shook his head to indicate that he wasn’t finished. “I watched my uncle die right in front of my eyes, and I feel…I feel sickened because you experienced the same damn thing with your mother. When you looked at me, you had probably seen the face of your family’s killer, and I—I couldn’t pretend that I didn’t know. That’s why I decided that the best way for me to stop hurting you was to stay away.”

“Levi…” Eren murmured, his own tears were falling and Levi lifted his hand to wipe them away. His fingers caught one tear after another and he couldn’t help but remember how similar this situation was when they were in France. He had also opened up to Eren back then, and he brought him to the grave of his parents. He also recalled that Eren promised something to him, right before everything went to shithole.

“I want to see your parents and properly apologize to them, for what my uncle had done to them. He might have had taken the responsibility of ensuring my survival, so now it’s my turn to return the favor. I’ll take the duty of bowing before your parents and say “I’m sorry” many times even if I know that’s nowhere near enough. But,” he paused and rested his hand on Eren’s cheek, gently caressing the smooth skin. He chuckled. “I don’t think they’ll ever forgive me.”

“Why?” Eren asked softly. He put his own hand over Levi’s and watched as emotions passed through the raven’s silver eyes.

“Because I want to ask for their blessings.”

Those green eyes were staring at him intensely and Levi didn’t want to lose himself before he could even finish what he was going to say.

“I want you to be in my life, Eren. I was only beating myself up for the wrong things and I should’ve known; I want to be a part of your life, _now and forever_. I want to wake up to your burnt eggs or your half-cooked pancakes or to that decent tea that only you could make—Hanji’s tea was shit but I’ll give her a B for effort.” Eren laughed and Levi smiled unconsciously because _who wouldn’t get affected by that cute laugh anyway?_ “I want to take more pictures with you and fill up that wall of memories until we need another big room to hang them. I want to go to other places with you—we’ll stay in Paris for however long you want, but I won’t ride a fucking carousel again.” Eren pouted at that and Levi sent him a scolding look full of love. “I want to go to that amusement park again or the aquarium. We can do that every year to commemorate the first time we met or our anniversary. I want to see you at the law firm again, waiting there with Petra and the others like you always do, with a bunch of art supplies and that bigass sketchbook of yours. Eren, give me another chance.”

“Oh, Levi.” Eren closed his eyes and Levi waited patiently. Patience was hardly a thing for the two of them. They had been rushing to things, which were either dangerous or completely selfish—and Levi knew that patience was one thing that they had to instill to themselves before they fucked up again, before he fucked up again.

“Pixis offered me a chance to go abroad. He said that he doesn’t want me to stop now when my talent is only beginning to grow. That’s why he gave me that gift: to study in Japan while working with patrons so I’ll be learning and earning money at the same time. It’s like a full-ride scholarship. I—I didn’t want to do it at first,” he opened his eyes and he was looking almost regretfully at Levi, “because I didn’t want to leave you. I don’t want to lose you.”

It stung to hear Eren sound like that and Levi knew that he was feeling regretful because he was willing to decline the offer that was given to him for Levi. He thought that he couldn’t have another chance with Eren, but that was utterly ridiculous. The brunet had shown his love to him in every form he could think of and Levi didn’t know how to forgive himself that he thought Eren would get tired of him. Eren also loved him, just like how he always had in the past.

He leaned closer until his lips hovered over Eren’s forehead and Levi pressed them until he could feel the warmth of his through his lips. He felt underserving to have this person in his life—Eren would be better off with a less complicated man—but Levi was selfish. He wanted Eren from the very beginning. It had nothing to do with the charm of Fate’s third time. It had everything to do with Eren Jaeger. It was because it was Eren, and he wanted nothing else, no one else but him.

“You won’t,” he said softly and Eren shifted to look up to him. Levi smiled, one that was reserved for Eren and Eren alone.

“What do you mean?” Eren asked with those big, bright eyes of his and Levi couldn’t resist the urge to hug him. So he did. He pressed their bodies together and Eren’s one arm flew to his back where he started rubbing the back of his neck, feeling the bristles of Levi’s undercut. Levi wrapped his arms securely around the brunet, patting his messy hair endearingly.

“I’m gonna go to Japan with you, Eren. I won’t let you go this time.”

He felt Eren freeze—no doubt shocked at the sudden declaration of Levi, though he had already said it a moment ago—and he couldn’t blame the younger because Levi didn’t really think about anything when he was on his way here. His mind was only filled with dread and hope, but after their exchange, Levi knew what he had to do.

He had to stop running away. He had to face his problems, and this time, it would be with Eren’s hand wrapped around his. He would stand next to Eren because there was no way that they would fall if one was present to help the other stand again. They would face whatever else that could come onto them in the future, and Levi knew that they would falter like they did many times in the past, but he knew that there would only be one thing to do in the end.

Come home to the arms of his love. And Eren was his home.

Eren finally relaxed in Levi’s arms and he couldn’t help but pull him even closer. He didn’t know if he would be able to sleep, not wanting to wake up in his dreams or nightmares and realize that Eren wasn’t there next to him, but…

He felt Eren’s even breathing and Levi couldn’t help but think, maybe Eren had found his peace in Levi’s presence.

What was he saying about fearing the future? Yeah, he really should stop that now. Eren was in his arms and that was all that mattered.

_This_ was all that mattered.

With that in mind, Levi had finally fallen asleep without a trace of darkness trailing on his wake, because there was that light that was guiding him. And that light told him that it was all right. Everything would be fine.

 

* * *

 

Levi awoke to a strange sensation of something pressing lightly on both of his cheeks alternatively, and he cracked one eye open but the blurry and lit image that greeted him made him close it again. It was too early. Too early to think about what he was gonna do in the house because he finished all his paperwork in a week’s time and he regretted that he took those two weeks off—

His eyes snapped open and he finally processed everything. Before him was Eren Jaeger, obviously shirtless because the firm and tanned lean muscles were the second to greet Levi’s sight. Eren was smiling at him with all his shining white teeth almost blinding Levi and he wondered if the brat had already brushed his teeth. He was a light-sleeper so Eren couldn’t possibly do that without waking him, so how—

“It’s already one in the afternoon, Levi. Are you planning to go to work at all?” Eren asked. His classic smartass attitude was present in his voice in which Levi snorted at.

“How come you have this much energy so early in the mor—” he immediately stopped mid-question and he clamped his mouth shut as his gray eyes focused on Eren, widening by the passing second. “Did—Did you just say it’s already _one_ in the _afternoon_?! What the f—”

“Yeah. You were sleeping pretty soundly,” Eren added with a smirk on his face.

Levi groaned and cursed. Erwin would grill him about skipping more of his work and he might get fired in no time, but the warmth that was surrounding him was too good to pass. Eren was there for him. He didn’t leave him. He registered that very fact as he stared at the young man unashamedly, which really embarrassed the other as evident with the way his cheeks slightly reddened.

“Can you stop looking at me like that?” Eren sounded scandalized and it made Levi spurred onto his teasing.

“You have to get used to this if you’re gonna spend the rest of your life with me, brat,” he retorted back with a smirk on his own.

The redness on Eren’s cheeks spread across his face and Levi wanted to chuckle because he knew where to push Eren’s buttons to the point of exploding. This was another reason why he loved him.

“You…You sounded like you were proposing just now,” Eren said, eyebrows were twitching and Levi rolled onto his back, feeling his muscles ache because he was not used to sleeping in a cramped space. He wasn’t complaining though—he got to sleep with Eren for the first time in two weeks they were apart. He wished he could’ve changed into something else other than the jeans that he was still wearing though; they were really uncomfortable as fuck.

This was what it was like to be living in Eren’s apartment, and he wondered if the brunet had ever felt cold in his bed without Levi. He sure was lonely and cold without Eren, and the big empty space on his bed was an everyday reminder of that. He didn’t want to go through that again—he might be exaggerating and cliché, but he didn’t care. He only wanted to be with Eren and that was it.

He looked at him and Eren stared back with equal love in his eyes and Levi smiled.

“Well, I’ll definitely do that in the future, so why not practice now?”

Needless to say, Levi had seen Eren beat his record of how-red-he-could-be-because-of-Levi.

But then Eren presented a dopey smile on his face with his adorable—yes, Levi was definitely getting mushy—red cheeks. He said teasingly, “Then, maybe I should make you wait ten years before I say ‘yes’?”

Levi wasn’t about to get beaten though and he leaned in close to Eren until their lips were just a breath away. He looked at those plumped pink lips and felt his desire to take away the loneliness of his own lips grow. He remembered the streaks of tears on Eren’s face last night and he couldn’t help but think of how much he wanted to make that the last time that he would see the brunet cry. Instead, Levi wanted Eren to cry out of happiness. That would be better.

Before he sealed the distance between them and give himself the satisfaction of tasting the sweetest kiss they’d ever shared so far with each other, Levi uttered his vow to Eren.

“That’s okay, brat. I promise to always live in the warmth of your love and call it home, because no words or actions can possibly show you the extent of how much I love you.”

Eternal love. Eternal happiness. That was what Levi was willing to give Eren.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank god I have my laptop right now XD I thought about this chapter during the car ride leaving home (I'm on a vacation right now) and wow... The last chapter will be the next one and I know that this chapter may be cliché, I just thought that the interaction between Eren and Levi would go like this if they were to have this kind of heart-to-heart talk, just like what happened to them in France. *sniffs* I don't wanna say bye yettttt TTvTT P-Please, just wait for the next chapter for more notes from me ~v~


	30. The Vow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Every beginning has an ending, but it means that there is another beginning that is bound to exist at the end of the story. This is the journey of their love together, and they promise to find that love again even in the next lifetime, and the next one after that, and the next . . .

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I watched Christina Perri's and Colbie Caillat's concert and they were so freaking amazing and now I need to put "A Thousand Years" here--the lyrics are just *v*
> 
> And ah, the format of this story is different from the other chapters XD You'll get it soon enough. I did promise that there will be a chapter of Levi's POV during the first time he met Eren ;)

**I don’t own SnK or the movie/book/song mentioned here**

* * *

  _"I vow to love you and no matter what challenges might carry us apart, we will always find a way back to each other."_

-Leo, _The Vow_

* * *

 

  **~Chapter Thirty: The Vow~**

Levi was pissed.

He just got back from Japan several days ago and he ought to adjust to the time difference here in this country now, but _no_. That fucking Commander Eyebrows had to ruin his day, which was supposedly consisted of his lazing around and maybe making the best of what his vacation days had left him. He couldn’t believe that he was standing in the middle of the fucking crowd—for fuck’s sake, did they all shower? He hoped so because he wasn’t gonna be pleased if anyone of them were to bump into him. Someone was gonna die. And a certain Captain America look-alike would be the first on his list.

He just needed the documents, so why the hell was he enduring the heat while an incoming headache was threatening to burst his temples out? Nothing like a good throbbing headache could top the cherry on the cake. Fuck. He had to get out of there. Why did he even agree to that ‘diplomatic’ condition of Erwin Fucking Smith?

Though, he had to admit that this was better than being greeted by a crazy scientist who bounced with energy as if they snorted an insane amount of Nerds or other high-sugar-dosed-candy every thirty minutes. That would probably send him to the mental institute right away.

Well… Hanji wasn’t really that bad. Maybe? He really didn’t want to think about that. He just hated those two close friends he had at the moment because nothing like having been stood up could possible stop the annoyance running high in his circulation right now.

Then, he bumped to someone.

And all hells broke loose. Levi barely heard the crisp crunch under the sole of his shoe because he only saw red. Holy shit, why the fuck was his day getting worse and worse by each passing second?

"What the fu—"

And the person who bumped to him had the audacity to actually start cursing at _him_?! Oh, holy hell, this imbecile was gonna get it.

Levi didn’t waste any time to swivel around, dark circles under his eyes were probably showing and indicating that he indeed needed his fucking sleep. The offender of his was fast at turning too and both of them faced each other at the same exact time and _what the hell_.

The world must be less cruel than he thought it was because Levi’s anger didn’t skyrocket at the sight of the lanky teenager because _wow_. Big bright eyes were looking at him and they were watering with unshed tears and if Levi were a lesser man, he would’ve had his jaw hanging open because at that split second, he processed that he was staring at the most gorgeous eyes he’d ever saw in his entire life. Blue, but not quite blue. Green, but not quite green. And he wanted to stare at them forever, but he completely forgot that his expression right now was most likely not a friendly one because the next thing he knew, the ~~cute~~ —annoying teen began to let out those fat, crocodile tears from his goddamned beautiful eyes.

"I'm soooo sowwrry!" the stranger sobbed and Levi’s temple twitched.

Forget those awe-striking pair of eyes. He was gonna pummel this crybaby’s ass to tomorrow because his forgotten headache came back full-force, with the addition of a crying grown-ass young adult.

Fuck his life.

           

* * *

 

Only that Levi was smiling.

Hanji’s mouth was hanging open comically and Levi wondered when was she going to close her damn mouth because flies might actually come and attack her. _Disgusting_.  He really needed a constant reminder as to why was he still friends with this eccentric less-than-a-lady because he didn’t think he could take any more of her doofiness. But who he was lying to anyway?

Hanji Zoe had been there for him during his ups and downs, and this moment was certainly ‘up’ for them. The redhead was without a doubt gonna say something and Levi wanted to beat her to it before she could start rambling on. Erwin wasn’t really helping the situation because he was merely standing a foot away from them, staring at Levi with deadpanned eyes as if he was saying _wow, I cannot believe that THIS man is finally going through this_.

Why were they there for him again? He really ought to call Farlan and Isabel to hurry the fuck up and save him from these weirdass people.

“I can’t believe—” He held up one hand and Hanji instantly stopped talking, clamping her lips shut.

“Spare me the speech for later. My ears are gonna bleed,” Levi stated as a matter-of-fact and he cringed when Hanji looked like she was about to cry. She made a move to hug Levi but he successfully evaded her attack, careful not to bump to anything because nobody would be prepared to a blood-curling punishment if some shit tarnished his silver-lined black suit. He’d been carefully and patiently waiting all this time, but then again he insisted on coming early to check if everything was ready.

He didn’t rent half of the amusement park for nothing.

“Aw! Okay, okay! At the future reception then!” Hanji gushed, beaming widely and showing all her blinding teeth. Levi shook his head and mentally asked himself if he would ever be ready for Hanji Zoe. Erwin finally approached them from where they were and now they were forming a triangle from where they were standing. It was ridiculous too, because Hanji was wearing a suit—a black one, like Erwin, but the blonde had a blue bowtie while the redhead wore a black necktie—but Levi let that one side. He couldn’t really convince Hanji to be decently normal anytime soon—that would be like trying to unstick your hand out from the mouth of a skinny jar.

“But really, renting the amusement park? I gotta tell you, this is like the most oddest but original proposing venue I’ve ever heard of,” Erwin remarked coolly, eyes swept around once before those blue orbs landed on Levi. The raven rolled his eyes at him and dusted off some nonexistent dirt from his black dress pants.

“Thank you, Erwin,” he suddenly said, startling both Hanji and the subject of gratitude. Both of his friends raised an eyebrow at him, as if saying _care to elaborate_ and Levi almost wanted them to keep on guessing because he obviously loved them like that. Not. He just wanted, for once, to be the one teasing them instead because he seriously had enough of their constant sexual jokes, which actually resulted to them being beet-red after Levi told them what Eren had given him for his last birthday—also known as Christmas and he always dreaded the day because he knew he would be some age away from Eren’s, but the brunet upheld his lover’s birthday of equal importance, if not more, and had always assured him that he was perfectly fine if he were actually keeping up with his libido and not running out of stamina to knock Eren’s breath away. Hanji and Erwin kinda stepped their teasing a notch down after that, much to his relief, but the redhead noisy woman wouldn’t just shut her trap about how incredibly cheesy Levi had become because of Eren. And then, Erwin joined with the teasing again.

Levi wanted some payback. But he obviously couldn’t do that right now without ruining his perfectly neat and expensive suit. He’d rather wait until he was completely equipped to shave Erwin Smith’s eyebrows and to replace Hanji’s glasses with the wrong lenses. It wasn’t that evil… Not really.

But he really gotta hand it to Erwin. Fate might have been playing around with Levi and Eren but the raven was sure of something.

Going to the amusement park because a certain Commander Eyebrows forgot about their meeting was the best mistake he’d ever made in his life.

It was the mistake that he wouldn’t mind leaving there on his record if it meant that he would have Eren Jaeger in his life.

 

* * *

 

Levi finally resolved the conflict that erupted in the middle of the fucking crowd by dragging the brunet away and making him sit his ass down on the bench where a bigass tree was shielding them away from the stares of many people. He couldn’t even fathom how this situation got so out of hand—wait, right. It was because this tallass kid started bawling for the people to see. He stood in front of him but avoided looking at those sea-green eyes because he didn’t want to get lost in them and make a fool out of himself.

“What the fuck is wrong with you, kid?" he growled. He didn’t really want to snap at him but Levi was at the end of his patience. He needed his sleep, period. The boy flinched though and he regretted lashing out at him because he didn’t deserved it. Okay, maybe the kid was partially at fault because he couldn’t contain his own tears and for making Levi look like a cruel lover who had the nerve to break up with his boyfriend in the middle of this scorching heat—and not to mention, they were in the amusement park.

"I-I-I'm sorry!” the stranger exclaimed and lowered his head to apologize. But he suddenly looked up, startling Levi a bit but he willed himself to remain impassive. "W-Wait... Why am I apologizing to _you_ when you were the one who broke my phone?!" He yelled out as he pointed an accusing finger to the raven. Despite his actions, Levi didn’t miss those green eyes completely checking him out _. Well, shit._ Might as well do the same thing while maintaining his angry-constipated expression, which wasn’t really hard because his exhaustion was doing half of the work.

And the kid wasn’t half bad. But he was clearly off-limits and Levi wasn’t about to breach that border regarding age differences. He was a decent person with a decent job and decent amount of friends, who he might recall bailed on him but that was beside the point. He’d rather not taint such innocence—

"First of all, phones get fucking dropped all the time by spoiled brats like you. Second, you were the one walking like you fucking owned the road. And third, you caused unnecessary shit by bawling your fucking eyes out in the middle of the fucking crowd like a—"

He stopped. The kid was crying again. Oh, God. This was going to be a long day. He didn’t know what came over him but he actually offered his handkerchief to him, but not without his insults and jabs that could’ve been worse if he wasn’t feeling guilty about the fact that he indeed stepped on the brat’s phone. And why the hell did he offer to fix his phone again? Right. Because Levi was a decent man who could offer decent apologies to decent people.

Certainly not because the kid had those big, bright ocean eyes that kept Levi drawn into them.

"So you were crying because you got ditched and was dumped by your girlfriend?"

Oh, my god. Why the fuck did he just ask that? Levi knew exactly why but he wasn’t close to admitting the reason for his obvious prying when he was still mentally recalculating his life decisions up to that point because _is he really interested in this kid?!_

"I don't think it is any of your business, _sir_ ," the stranger gritted out, making Levi silently grimace. Yup, he really shouldn’t have asked.

_Time to change the subject._

"Let's get on to that ride," Levi offered instead, trying to forget his initial embarrassment because that was the only thing that he could do at the moment. The brunet looked at the ride, which stood tall and made Levi’s stomach queasy at the thought of being that up high but _fuck it_ , and the brat stood there deep in thought as Levi grew even more impatient.

"Oi. Are you just going to stand there like an idiot?" he asked, though he tried not to be brusque about it. It wasn’t like he was freaking excited to get onto that ride with a stranger who looked like he was just fresh out of high school and who happened to have the most enticing pair of eyes ever. Yeah, Levi was definitely not trying to get to know that intriguing stranger... He was only trying to offer up his apologies?

Something was _definitely_ wrong if he started asking a stranger to come and ride this shitty amusement park’s attractions with him. Of course, Levi was lying because their rides looked freaking intimidating and he wanted to puke at the sight of them. He wasn’t the one to back out though. Not a chance.

Not when he was trying to impress someone.

_Fuck,_ something was definitely wrong with him.

 

* * *

           

“Hey, are you nervous?”

Levi’s eyebrow twitched but he focused his gray eyes on the people who surrounded them at the grand space. There was something comforting at the sight of his childhood friends, Isabel and Farlan, standing across from him near the benches and Levi couldn’t believe that they were here because he wasn’t used to seeing them in any other place other than their home country. There was a light swell in his chest at the thought of those two traveling across the ocean just to see this very memorable day with him. It wasn’t the time for tears though, because the light jitter that was lit up in his veins was making his stomach queasy and he was reminded of that day when he offered Eren to accompany him on the rides that Levi despised. Oh, the things that he did for Eren.

“I’m not,” he lied through his teeth but his words were countered by the slight bounce on the balls of his feet because _how the hell is he supposed to stand still when his heart is hammering wildly against his chest?_

“You need to take a chill pill,” Hanji suggested. She was standing next to Levi and Erwin was on the other side of the raven, and together they formed one of the best trios that would be present today. “What are you afraid of anyway? That Eren would bail out on you? Don’t worry, he’s not Captain Eyebrows.”

Levi didn’t have any retort to that and he only glared at Hanji, hoping that she would wilt away as far as possible because _yes, he’s really nervous as fuck._ No need to add comments that would make him want to go to the bathroom for the fifth time.

Levi rented half of the amusement park and purposely chose the grand lot where a beautiful fountain was located at the center and with enough space for all the people to stand and fit in. He contemplated whether to rent the entire area or not, but with a lot of convincing from Erwin and Hanji who said that that was absolutely unnecessary and a waste of money, he settled with his current decision. Levi wasn’t really against the idea of having enough people that would give the atmosphere that they were totally in the amusement park because he figured that Eren would like the thrill of having this event take place in such setting plus, his ever-so-loving boyfriend and his friends loved the crowd.

It was spring—because it was the same season when he first met Eren—and the stars were clattered in the dark sky, twinkling happily as if offering some encouragement to Levi, which he really needed. He couldn’t believe that _this_ would be this nerve-wracking.

He thumbed the smooth velvet surface of the box in his pocket. He couldn’t believe that he was really doing this.

Just this morning, Levi barely managed to entangle himself from Eren, because who wouldn’t be able to resist the warmth that only Eren could provide him? But in order for his plan to work out, he needed to shift the gears and get ready for action. He called Mikasa and Armin to check up on them and so far, so good. Levi had instructed them to keep Eren distracted the whole day while Levi and his own squad prepared everything necessary at the venue. The surprises would be up when Eren arrived, and that was what keeping Levi on his toes. What if something went wrong and he managed to shut down the whole electricity system of the place? What if someone screwed up on their job and the surprises wouldn’t work?

He was gonna go crazy, and it was only ten minutes before the subjected time. He could still hear little cries from people who were riding the rides somewhere on the other side of the amusement park. Oh, god. He wondered if he would be able to pull this off.

Isabel suddenly skipped towards him and gave him a lopsided smile.

“All this time, I actually thought you didn’t have a romantic bone in your body, but guess I thought wrong,” she remarked.

Levi thought it was ridiculous. He really wasn’t a romantic, but what Isabel had said made him smile. He was momentarily blinded and he almost twitched when he caught Hanji holding her camera up, positioned as to how she took a picture of him.

“Hanji…”

“Aw, c’mon! Eren would love to see this!”

He sighed. He really couldn’t argue with that. He didn’t even complain anymore when Farlan finally revealed his own recording camera and was focusing it to the people present here.

All of Eren’s friends were littered around the open space and Levi realized that if he were going to propose to the man that he loved, then the people who also cared and loved Eren deserved to see this awaited moment of their beloved brunet. They had been through a lot, and these people who were present at this very moment had witnessed Eren and Levi fight and overcome the obstacles that rose up against them. They were there to help them—Mike had protected Eren in all those five years, Jean and Eren’s high school friends got themselves involved in order to free Eren from the burden of his past, and Mikasa’s parents raised him as their own son and had accepted him as a part of their family. They weren’t the only ones—Hanji, Erwin, the SOS, and Levi’s childhood friends were also here to see this dream come alive. They made Levi realize just how many people had been connected to them all this time.

Levi looked up to the sky and mouthed something to Hanji.

It was time to set everything in motion.

 

* * *

           

Levi threw up. Like, how unfuckingcool was that? He couldn’t even believe that he offered to give the brat a ride when it was his fault that the raven’s stomach was currently empty. He was certainly NOT happy that he found out that it was perfectly legal to be attracted to Eren—he found out his name, at last. Shit, something was definitely wrong…or right for once? He couldn’t help but mull over what had happened during eight or more hours he was at the amusement park. He spent a day with a stranger—what the hell had he been drinking this morning?

When they arrived at their destination, Levi was faced with a yet another predicament. Eren was sleeping. His head almost slipping off the headrest, and his arms were lying on his sides. Levi glanced at the apartment building and noticed that there were only a few lights lit up. It was already 12:10 am.

"Aren't you gonna get in trouble?" Levi hissed at the sleeping figure and he leaned in closer to Eren, trying to wake up the brunet. The young man stirred, his head totally slipping off the headrest and Levi was glad that he was able to catch Eren's head on his shoulder.

"You have to wake up, you know—" Levi was cut off as he turned to look at the young man beside him. He really did look like a teenager, with slightly tanned skin and boyish features. His eyelashes were mad long and Levi found that genuinely attractive. Not that he would admit that out loud.

"I spent one day with him and I'm getting all mushy," Levi muttered under his breath and attempted to look away from the tempting young man on him. But it was difficult and somehow, Levi found himself leaning even closer until his lips hovered the green-eyed brat's forehead.

_I'm probably gonna regret this_ was his final thought and Levi finally pressed his lips on the smooth temple of the young man, who was suddenly breathing unevenly but Levi didn't even notice it. He was busy trying to get a hold of the rampaging beast inside his chest, namely his heart.

He turned his face to the front and felt like it was suddenly stifling hot—like his face was literally burning and he wanted to drink gallons of water and hope that it would put out the fire. But he resolved to wake the heck up of the brat on his shoulder instead. He swiveled to his side again, raising his unoccupied hand to pinch the young man's cheek, but he was met with staring green orbs.

"Uh..." Eren mumbled.

Levi realized then that he was screwed. Oh, yeah. He figured that somewhere along his way back here in the country from Japan, he definitely messed up something.

And when he felt Eren’s pair of lips pressed up against his cheek, he knew that there was no way that his heart would ever calm down without ever thinking of kissing those lips. There was no way of going back—

_Oh, shit. Did I just really fall in love with a brat that I just met?_

But Levi didn’t regret anything that day. And their meetings resumed.

 

* * *

 

Everyone took those remaining five minutes to hide. Mikasa and Armin updated Hanji that they were almost there and Levi was reminded of _Hunger Games_ when all their friends and family suddenly scrambled to find a place to mask their presence in the shadows. It almost made him want to follow them, but he had a greater dignity than that.

There were lamps provided around the place but Levi specifically ordered them to light up just one of them, and it would be near him so that Eren would be able to find his way to Levi. Just like he always had in the past.

He swallowed when he heard the obvious sound of footsteps and then he heard Eren call out.

“Mikasa? Armin? Where are you, guys? It’s so dark here.” The last statement was a bit quieter like Eren was mumbling to himself and Levi didn’t doubt that he was.

When Eren appeared, he was some distance away from Levi, walking on the pavement that would lead the way to the raven. Levi instantly swallowed the lump in his throat and pocketed the velvet box in his pants as if to check if it was still there. Yeah, it was still there and _I’m really doing this._

Eren’s lips formed a smile the moment his eyes landed on Levi and the latter immediately smiled back, something he learned he wouldn’t be able to fight off. This was one of the things that Eren brought into his life, his smiles that could light up Levi’s world—no matter how cliché that sounded. Eren then practically skipped on his way to Levi and the grey-eyed man was really glad that his boyfriend could be pretty oblivious on some occasions. It wasn’t until he was merely standing some distance away from Levi when he finally took notice that there was something peculiar around him. Those ocean eyes scanned his surroundings, resting on the single lamppost that was lit before it landed on Levi’s face.

“…Why are _you_ here?” Eren asked suspiciously, eyebrows were drawing together.

Levi snapped his fingers without taking his eyes off Eren.

And the big Ferris wheel lit up.

Eren let out a loud gasp, mouth was parting and Levi was reminded that he always teased him about looking like a goldfish when he was surprised. Those beautiful eyes were staring at the lights and Levi could see that Eren had a hard time tearing his eyes off the sight in front of him by how he craned his neck to turn to Levi.

“What is this…?” he choked out. As the two of them grew more to love each other, the more they found out things about their characters. Their quirks that they had grown fond of, their habits that they had become used to, and their ways of saying I love you’s. That’s why, Levi knew that Eren could be deeply touched by things like this, and the brat was definitely holding his tears back. Levi would’ve gladly let out his own tears, too, if not for the fact that he knew that they had an audience and that this was just the first step of everything he had set up.

“What’s that?” Eren suddenly asked, eyes were searching for answers and Levi knew that he was probably straining his ears too. They both heard it—a faint tune of violin and piano, sounds were harmonizing with each other. A familiar voice followed it, and both of them turned towards the lamppost that shone to reveal Krista singing and the others smiling at them. Levi broke into a smile—even if it was a small one—he thought they were still hiding. He certainly didn’t expect them to be at the gazebo.

_Heart beats fast_

_Colors and promises_

_How to be brave?_

_How can I love when I'm afraid to fall?_

_But watching you stand alone,_

_All of my doubt suddenly goes away somehow._

_One step closer_

Tears started to roll down Eren’s cheeks and the brunet slowly wiped them away. Levi’s own eyes watered, glistening with unshed tears. He took that moment to bend and kneel on one knee, taking the box that he had been checking for the past several hours out of his pocket with a trembling hand.

There were no doubts or fears when he held it in front of Eren. He was nervous but it was because he was thinking that his heart wouldn’t be able to take it—it might just explode with happiness.

_I have died every day waiting for you_

_Darling, don't be afraid I have loved you_

_For a thousand years_

_I'll love you for a thousand more_

Eren bit his bottom lip, smiling, and his tears came tumbling down his face. Levi’s hands shook but he willed them to be steady.

_And all along I believed I would find you_

_Time has brought your heart to me_

_I have loved you for a thousand years_

_I'll love you for a thousand more_

Levi opened his mouth to finally speak. His head was a jumble but he knew of the words that he wanted to say ever since he met Eren.

“I... I can’t believe that I’m doing this when I’m already 33.” He shook his head slightly and Eren laughed. “But I guess this is what love does to you. Fuck, that was cheesy.” Levi really wanted to gut himself. _Wow, talk about being smooth. Mikasa and Four-Eyes are probably laughing right now._ Eren kept looking at him with mirth in his eyes and thank god, his tears stopped. Levi didn’t want to get affected by looking at those shining bright eyes because he knew that he would get emotional himself—not that he would admit that out loud.

“This…I’ve never done this in my entire life nor attempted to. You’re the first one,” Levi looked up and met Eren’s gaze directly. “You’re the first one to prove to me that being in love with someone can change you—for the better or worse. You’re the first one to show me what a real home feels like; that the warmth that it brings is actually real. You made me believe in Fate.”

“Levi…” Eren started, and it looked like his tears weren’t going to stop anytime soon.

Levi opened the black box, displaying a silver band that shone with the lights surrounding them, and then stared back at Eren. His eyes were dancing with the colors, different hues were reflected against them, and they fascinated Levi even more than ever. Maybe it was because he could see how happy Eren was. Or maybe it was the other way around—Levi could see how happy he was in the eyes of his beloved.

“Eren, I vow to remain by your side, in sickness and in health, no matter how many times you turn on the smoking detector with your cooking,” Eren laughed at that, which made Levi’s lips tug upwards, “no matter what challenges are presented in front of us, be it your over-protective sister or my nosy friends,” there were several complaints about that in the background and one of them was definitely Hanji. Levi continued, “I vow to make up with you, despite our differences and the fights that we’ve had and will definitely have in the future—it can’t be help that one is a stubborn old fool and the other is a hotheaded brat,” Eren snorted at that.

Levi took Eren’s hand and smiled with all sincerity and love he felt for this person before him. He then said, “I vow to love you until the very last of my breath, _always and forever_. Eren, will you marry me?”

Eren bent down and Levi felt him press his forehead against his, Eren’s tears were falling on Levi’s cheeks but the raven didn’t care. His lover squeezed his hand before he uttered his answer; “I vow to love you even more with each passing second until the very last of my breath, _always and forever_. Yes, Levi. I will marry you.”

Levi smiled, to the point that he was laughing with happiness. He caressed Eren’s cheek before he lifted his hand. He took the ring out of the box and slid it into Eren’s finger, his own tears were rolling down his face to the point that he looked like he was a sobbing mess. Then, there was a loud cheer behind them and a loud _boom_ interrupted the silence.

Blazing lights streaked across the sky and there was only one thing that both of them could think of: _beautiful._

People came out of their hiding spot and Hanji yelled out, “Hey! That was practically your wedding vows! Just get married already!”

It got everyone laughing and for the first time, Levi didn’t hide his tears—they were his own tears of joy anyway, it would be a shame to keep them to himself.      

He was suddenly pulled and he was startled when he was met with Eren’s ocean eyes. The brunet gave him a grin before he pecked his lips.

“That’s it?” Levi deadpanned, wanting to sound a bit demanding but it was hard to when he had a huge smile on his face. Eren didn’t waste time to close the distance between them, and Levi’s lips met his halfway. The kisses that they’d shared had been sweet, but this no doubt was the sweetest of them all. Levi could actually just ignore the fact that everyone’s attention was on them and just feel the softness of his fiancé’s lips—now, he really liked the sound of _that_ —but then, Eren pulled away and Levi almost tugged his hair back.

Eren smiled at him and said, “When we first met each other, we didn’t try the Ferris wheel, did we?”

Levi shook his head and chuckled.

“Time to cross that off your list, then. But don’t fall,” he teased.

Eren began to lead the way to the humongous wheel and he looked back at Levi to say, “I don’t mind falling in love with you all over again.” And he winked.

Levi’s face warmed. He wondered how long would it take until his heart gave out, dealing with this _adorable shit_ for the rest of his life.

_For the rest of his life, huh? That doesn’t sound too bad_.

           

 

Levi Ackerman is pretty sure that he will find a certain brat again in his next lifetime, and the next after that, and the next… And he will definitely fall in love again with him—with Eren Jaeger.

 

* * *

 

**On the sideline . . .**

Armin kept his unshed tears back to where they belonged as he continued to stare at one of the best friends that he had. Eren looked definitely happy, the happiest Armin had seen him in his life, and he was glad that Eren and Levi met each other.

He turned to Mikasa and saw her raised eyebrow, along with Jean who looked deep in thought. Both of them spoke at the same time.

“So that Shortie was the one who took Eren home _that_ night…?”

“That Shortie made a move on Eren when I broke up with him…?”

Armin couldn’t help but wonder when would they start calling Levi by his name. Surely, they would respect him by not calling him ‘Shortie’ sometime in this lifetime, right?

Right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ...Okay, I don't know where to begin because a lot of things are happening all at once in my life XD But okay, here it goes: 
> 
> A HUGE THANK YOU for those who watched this story unfold from beginning to the end, for those who stuck through--wow, such patience LOL I was really nervous about this story because it's my first time writing a BL fic *looks away*   
> I'm such a SnK fan and I've never been truly involved in uhh this whole shipping business until now... (Btw, I'm also shipping KageHina now, too... what even... But I'm also into HakYona (Hak is just... *hearts-eyes appear*)--> Lemme be your friend if you happen to ship these couples hehehe ^3^)
> 
> NOW, Special thanks to: Neko_yuki_onna (your comment in every update is really encouraging :)), Fallen_Nightmares, MikoVampire (I can feel your emotions through the CAPSLOCK *grins*), IAmNotCapableOfInventingACleverUsername, andddddd   
> OokamiXkitsune (I won't ever forget that you're one of the very very few readers who actually gives me such long, amusing, and meticulous comments XD You're forever remembered and good luck with everything you do :D)
> 
> Oh, and uh, sorry about the mistakes and everything XD Whenever I finish a chapter, I merely reread it once and then *done*.  
> THANKS FOR EVERYTHING :D I hope I can follow this with my new story soon ^v^


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